Superman Complex
by seevousplay
Summary: Edward Cullen is a rock star in the biggest band of the decade. He's America's "It Boy," but he's still unhappy. Will Bella be in time to save him? AH AU. Nominated for Rare Gem Award
1. Chapter 1

Edward Cullen is a rock star in the biggest band of the decade. He's America's "It Boy," but he's still unhappy. Will Bella be in time to save him? AH AU

**Disclaimer:** Stephanie Meyer is the genius who created _Twilight_; I'm just toying around with her characters.

_Superman Complex_

So, she isn't sure why, but she's so fucking lost right now. Seriously, this is something out of that one movie, where the band can't find the stage…. you know, _This is Spinal Tap_? Yeah, that one. She's walking in circles, and every time she thinks she's close to finding the way to the stage, or the crowd or where ever the fuck, Bella just finds herself opening a door to a storage closet, or walking in circles.

She really doesn't even know how she got down here, she knows she's about two floors under ground now, she knows she went down two flights of stairs, and when she went to look for the right way back up, the way she came, she just found more stairs leading down.

"This is so _Alice in Wonderland_," she sighs, walking down to the end of a corridor, looking around and hoping she finds a way out. She's about to turn around, head back the way she came when she hears a little sound, almost like a cry, but she isn't sure. She goes to the sound, opening the door and almost slamming it closed just because she can't _believe_ what she's seeing.

She doesn't though, she doesn't close the door. No, Charlie taught her better than that. She hurries into the closet and closes the door behind her, almost like someone might show up out of no where and see them together.

Edward Cullen, the _one and only_ Edward Cullen is on his knees, crying, wrist out, holding a fucking _box cutter_ over his bright blue vein, crying about how he's so alone. Bella's a little wary, not quite sure what she's supposed to do, but she just takes a step closer, hesitantly, and whispers, "Mr. Cullen?"

It's like Edward hadn't seen her before, but now that he has, he just glares and runs the blade hard over his skin. He hisses at the feeling for a second, but moves the blade and runs it over his wrist again, harder, deeper, and Bella is in some kind of shock, at all the blood. She doesn't know what she's supposed to do. She rushes forward, even with Edward's 'leave me, just get the fuck out's' and reaches for the blade, trying to stop him before the rusty, coppery, smell of blood gets to her.

Edward's still quick, turns the blade away from himself, pointing and slashing at Bella's forearm, and Bella cries out as the blood pushes out from the wound, mixing in an almost beautiful swirl with Edward's. She can almost see the color difference, even though there really isn't one, but in her mind, while Edward is bleeding out onto the floor, and Bella is hovering over him, there is, and Bella's transfixed by it.

While Bella's staring at the blood that's pooling around them, Edward's shaky hand is slicing into his opposite wrist, hard, or as hard as he can, he can't use much pressure, he's already bled out enough blood to soak his shirt, and his jeans below him, spots of crimson marking his material possessions brightly.

"Mr. Cullen," Bella tries again, reaching her hand to cover the cut on her arm. It burns, but she's not worrying about herself right now, she's much more worried about Edward. So when she kneels down, the first thing she goes for is the box cutter. She tosses it to the side of the closet, out of reach, and grabs Edward's wrists in her hands, tightens down on them to stop the blood flow. "Mr. Cullen, you need to listen to me, right now, ok? My name is Isabella Swan, and we're going to get you out of here."

"No one will care," Edward sobs, "No one will care whether I'm dead or alive."

Bella shakes her head, but Edward is persistent, "No one, I'm worthless. I'm nothing. No one loves me, I'm alone, and I'm. Now, I'm dying."

Bella shakes her head again, pulling her right hand off of Edward's wrist to hold his chin steady, His eyes are bloodshot, and she thinks that maybe Edward's a little… inebriated? Drunk? High? She's not sure, but she says, "You are not alone, I'm right here, and there is a packed house out there, waiting, and in an hour, they'll be screaming _your_ name, Mr. Cullen, your name, and you're down here, trying to end it? You're not going to die."

Edward blinks a few times, inhales deeply, and now all she can smell is the copper of blood, and Bella can tell Edward's starting to panic, but runs her thumb over Edward's cheek soothingly, "Mr. Cullen, do you have a phone, so I can find a way out?"

Even though Edward doesn't answer, Bella wipes her bloodied hand on his shirt and reaches around in Edward's pockets until she finds it. There's no service, (of course there isn't) but at least it's got numbers she can use. Bella's going to have to call Edward's band mates, but first she's going to have to find the stupid stairs.

"Ok, Mr. Cullen, I need you to do me a big favor alright? You're not dying, I'm not going to let you, but you have to do something for me."

"Doesn't matter. No one will care," he pouts, and Bella's really getting sick of it at this point.

"Snap the fuck out of it," she says loudly, her voice echoing off the walls of the small room. "_I _will care; do you realize that if I just leave, you will die? Do you? I can't let that be on my conscience. Now wrap your hands over the cuts on opposite arms, and wrap your arms around my neck." Edward does it—slowly-- but he does it. "Good, ok, now we're going to stand up, and you're going to wrap your legs around my waist and hold on. We're going to get you help, ok Mr. Cullen?"

Edward nods, and once they're standing, he follows Bella's instructions and wraps his legs around Bella's waist. He's feeling a little light headed, dropping his head to Bella's shoulder, and whispering, "I'm too heavy."

"I've got you," she whispers back, even though her legs are already shaking from the weight, and she's already squeamish from all the blood. "I've got you, Mr. Cullen, don't worry."

"Thank you."

"No, no, Mr. Cullen," Bella panics; she can hear the defeated tone in his voice, like he's giving up. "You can't pass out on me; you have to keep talking, ok, please, just keep talking. Tell me anything, just keep talking."

Bella's walking as fast as her tiny legs can take her, carrying the extra, what? One hundred and seventy pounds? She's searching, and she wishes this _was_ _Alice in Wonderland_ because then the Cheshire Cat would show up, and even if he didn't point Bella in the right direction, he'd point her in _some_ direction, other than the one she was going.

"Mr. Cullen, keep talking to me, I can't hear you," but Bella can feel his lips moving over the skin of her neck, murmuring over and over again, but she can't _hear_ it. Edward probably knows the way back up, but Bella wants him to focus on keeping his wrists held tight. "Hey, keep that grip tight, ok Mr. Cullen? I need you to hold it tight."

She's kind of worried about him, he's getting quieter, and she can feel Edward's blood flowing down her back and she knows that she's bleeding on Edward. She's looking around frantically, telling him over and over again to keep talking, and she hears Edward talking about his sixth birthday, and how they had a Superman cake, and it was his favorite.

Finally Bella finds the stairs, and she rushes up the first set, but after she gets to the landing, she's completely and utterly out of breath, and she doesn't think she can make it up another flight. "I need"-she breathes, panting-"help. We need help."

She reaches for Edward's phone, and thanks _whoever_ for small favors, because she's got service. "Baby, who should I call, I need help, and I can't. We need help."

"Jasper," he whispers, and if Edward's lips weren't on Bella's neck, she wouldn't have been able to comprehend what's being said to her. She flips up the screen, goes for the address book, looking over Edward's shoulder, and typing JA-S-P-E-R before hitting send and putting the phone to her ear.

"Edward, where the fuck are you?" Is the first thing Bella hears, and almost drops the phone when the voice sounds in her ear.

"J- Mr. Whitlock? Uhm. My name is Bella," and she's still breathing hard, "I. We. Edward--I mean--Mr. Cullen, he needs your help."

Jasper's quiet for a second and then he's calling for Emmett, who's listening in. "Who are you?"

"I. I don't, can't breathe, don't," she stumbles, and almost drops Edward as they make their ascent up the next flight up stairs. "He's bleeding, he. Box cutter. Stairs." She can't say anything else _and_ get up the stairs, so she just kind of ends the call and holds on tight to the railing. "Mr. Cullen, please, keep talking."

She hears steps, fast moving steps, getting closer, and closer, and when she sees Edward's band mates, she does everything she can not to collapse right there, just says, "Call 9-1-1."

Bella sees Emmett reach for his phone, at the same time Jasper is grabbing Edward out of her arms and cradling him in his own. Bella falls to her knees instantly at the lack of weight and she can hear Edward crying, apologizing over and over again. He's still gripping at his wrists. Bella isn't sure what to do, so she pulls her shirt over her head, and uses all of the strength she's got left to rip the shirt into two strips, wrapping them tight around Edward's wrists.

"Mr. Cullen, I know it hurts, but you have to keep them tight, ok? You have to keep them from bleeding." He's lost a lot of blood, Edward has, and Bella knows they're going to have a fuck of a time trying to keep him alive now, he's already pale, and he's cold to the touch, and he's shaking. "Here," she pants out, still ridiculously out of breath, "Give him here," and Jasper, he doesn't know what's going on, or what happened, or who she is, but he hands him over to her anyway, and stands up to make sure Emmett's called.

Wrapping her arms around Edward, she lays them down and covers as much of Edward's body with her own, trying to keep her warm, despite the cooling blood on their skin.

"Keep talking to me, Edward," she whispers quietly, "I can't hear you."

She passes out before Edward can start talking again.

*

When Bella wakes up, she can hear quiet talking, almost like arguing back and forth, and she can feel a warm body next to her, gripping her like she'll fly away. Her eyes blink open, and Edward Cullen is curled around her, and the first thing Bella notices is that Edward's in a hospital gown, and the blood is gone. Bella still feels dirty, can feel the blood seeping down her neck, even though she's clean too. The voices stop, and when Bella looks up, both of Edward's band mates are staring at her, toeing the ground like they've got bad news.

"So, uh, thanks," Jasper starts. "I mean, you saved his life, you know?"

Bella just nods, she's not really sure what to do anyway, so nodding seems like the best idea. "No problem, ya?"

Emmett's next, "You have to leave," and it's a jumbled mix of words thrown together amazingly fast, and Bella _almost_ doesn't catch it. "The doctor said if you stay, and he wakes up, he'll have what's called the Superman Complex. The nurses couldn't even stitch up his wrists because he wouldn't let you go, and if he wakes up, he'll be Lois Lane, and you'll be Superman. You _have_ to leave before he wakes up."

Bella can barely _sit_ up, let alone walk out of the hospital and not… you know, die. But Emmett persists, "We'll pay you, for all of your medical expenses, and your recovery, any therapy you'll need, obviously we'll pay for it, but you need to go before he wakes up."

Jasper, who has stayed quiet through this puts a hand up, "Em," and then looks at Bella. "What he's trying to say is that, if you stay, and he wakes up, you'll be stuck with him for months, years even, and the doctor said that with him, probably longer, because of his abandonment issues. Seven days a week, twenty-four hours a day, non stop, like taking care of a child."

"You won't be able to get rid of him,. He'll cling to you every where, doctor says he won't so much as sleep unless you're sleeping next to him. You'll be the hero, and he'll be the damsel in distress. It will be easier if you leave." Emmett is not so willing to understand that Bella _can't_ leave.

"Emmett, c'mon," Jasper tries, but this time, Bella holds up a hand.

"What happens if I go? What will happen to Mr. Cullen then?"

"He'll be medicated for the next few days as it is, but after that, he'll be monitored by professionals for the following weeks, to make sure he doesn't pull anything."

"Why wouldn't he be monitored by professionals if I stay?"

"The doctor says that if you're around, he won't need the monitoring. He thinks you'll be enough."

"You have to go," Emmett tries again, "Seriously. You don't know him, or what he's about, and even if you want to stay _now_, you're life will be put on hold for months, years even."

"Either way," Jasper interrupts, "We have a gag order for you, to sign you know, this is scandalous stuff, and if you don't sign it, you can leak it to the press."

"I wouldn't do that, ever."

"Just to clear our worries out then, yeah? But the decision, ultimately is yours. You'll be provided housing and everything if you stay, of course, and will be compensated for it all, and Edward, well, he probably won't remember any of this when he wakes from his medicated coma, but he'll rely on you if you're here, you understand?"

Bella nods, taking in all of what she was just told, and then Jasper adds, "Neither of us want to see him medicated and cooped up for the next few months, but this is a big burden, for you, and it's not fair to you either. The decision though, we leave to you."

*

Emmett and Jasper leave Bella alone with her thoughts a few minutes later. Leaving the very ominous, 'the decision is yours', which is so fucking _Captain Planet_ of them. Bella wants to slap them. If they weren't part of Bella's favorite band, and she hadn't almost lost the front man to suicide, she's pretty sure she'd hate Emmett McCarty and Jasper Whitlock.

She doesn't though. Couldn't really. She knows that both of them are just trying to look out for Edward's safety, all the while taking into account that _they_ can't help him. Not on their own, and Bella knows. She's been a fan of _Twilight_ since their first record was released six years ago. She knows how close the three of them are. Knows all the stories about them. How Jasper and Edward saved Emmett from himself before Rosalie Hale came into Emmett's life. How Emmett and Edward saved Jasper from the fan girls after they found out about his secret marriage to Alice Brandon. Bella knows they're family, with or without the blood similarities, and knows that they must be feeling completely useless right now… not being able to help Edward through this.

"Why did you do this, Edward Cullen?" she whispers to him softly, stroking the bronze hair settled on her chest. Edward exhales softly into her hospital gown and tightens his grip on her body.

She feels like she's been hit with a truck, her legs feel like jelly, and her arm burns like she held it over an open flame. She can't even _try_ to imagine how Edward's arms are feeling right now.

Bella's almost asleep when she hears the soft sounds of feet padding down the hallway. She doesn't know who it could be, but when the door to their room opens, Bella squints and then gasps, because it's Alice Brandon, all four feet ten inches of her, hurrying over to Edward's side.

"Oh god," she whispers, hand coming up to cover the sobs ripping from her body. "Edward, oh my god."

Bella clears her throat, sorry that she can't get away and give Alice and Edward a few minutes alone. Alice looks up at her, tears in her eyes, and smiles a weak, appreciative smile.

"You saved his life," she whispers. "You saved him. Thank you so much," she continues. "He's. Edward is my best friend, Miss Swan, and you. I. I couldn't be there. I. I didn't _know_. I didn't _see_."

Bella shakes her head, and lets Alice cry, motioning to the chair so that Alice can sit down. "Don't thank me," she breathes. "I was at the wrong place at the right time. I'm glad he'll be ok, that's all."

"Miss Swan," Alice smiles. "I don't know how you did it, or how you got up the stairs, or… Or anything, but please, let me thank you. You just saved his life; all of our lives."

The nurse comes in shortly after, putting a syringe filled with pain medication into Bella's IV, checks her vitals, and then walks out with a very portentous, "You won't feel a thing in a little bit."

Bella falls asleep as Alice starts talking again.

*

When she wakes up again, the room is full of people that Bella doesn't know. She recognizes a most of them; Rosalie Hale, Emmett McCarty, Jasper Whitlock, and Alice Brandon. (She blushes because they're _famous_, and she's just… Bella) a few of the other faces are not so familiar.

When Alice sees that she's awake, she grins up at Bella, moving to the bed to grab her hand, sitting on the tiny space available on the hospital bed.

"Miss Swan-"

"Bella. Just Bella, please."

"Bella," Alice corrects. "Allow me to introduce Esme and Carlisle Cullen, Edward's parents. Carlisle, Esme, this is Bella."

Esme comes up, taking Bella's free hand and squeezes tightly. "It's really a great pleasure to meet you, Bella. We owe you quite a bit of thanks."

"You don't," Bella shakes her head. "I did what anyone else would do."

"But it was _you_ who did it," Carlisle says, coming up to shake her hand. "And for that, we thank you."

Carlisle Cullen, Bella finds out, is a doctor in Edward's home town of Forks, Washington. Esme Cullen was a full time mom for Edward, but when he got older, she started a daycare because she missed the sounds of children.

Carlisle, he comes up to Bella's side, the one Edward is gripping onto with every ounce of strength, and looks over the chart.

"It looks like your legs are pretty bruised, and you torn a ligament in your knee, so that's what the brace is for, but besides that, and the stitches in your wrist, you should be able to leave the hospital in a few days," he smiles sadly, looking up at her with what she thinks is anticipation.

"A few days?"

"Well, with the minor damage to your person, you could probably get out of here tomorrow, if you wished it, but the doctors here in Phoenix would like you to stay to keep Edward comfortable while they wean him off the pain medication.

"Obviously, the choice is yours, Bella. For our sake, we'd wish you to stay."

"Not all of us," Emmett sighs. Rosalie nods, and pulls Emmett's hands into her own.

"It's not safe for him to wake up with her here. Carlisle, you of all people should know the consequences."

"Enough, Rosalie," Carlisle shakes his head. "We can discuss this at the hotel."

Bella can feel the tension that's suddenly washed over the room, but doesn't know how to fix it, so she just exhales deeply and rests her head on Edward's.

"Doctor Cullen?"

"Carlisle, please Bella, its Carlisle."

"Carlisle, when will Edward be taken off the medication? I mean, if I stay?"

"Well," Carlisle says, taking a breath. "That depends completely on how he reacts when he wakes up. It could go in multiple directions. He could be stable alone when he wakes up for all we know. Or he could be ridiculously dependent on you, we're just not sure – and won't be sure—until Edward wakes up.

"I really can't tell you much of anything, but Bella, please realize the consequences of your actions. I take it to mean that you're planning on staying."

Bella nods.

"As much as we want you to stay, and as much as we don't want our son hospitalized, monitored, and drugged, I can't let you stay unless you completely understand the reality of your decision.

"Every step you take will have Edward at your side, and best case scenario, he recovers in months; _months_, Bella. Worst case scenario, he could never recover. Your life," Carlisle sighs. "Will completely change because of him."

"I think I understand the severity of my decision," Bella says. "My life changed the minute I opened that closet door and saw him." Looking up from Carlisle to Esme she adds, "Look, I want to see him get better as fast as possible, just like the rest of you. I can't just leave knowing he'll be hospitalized indefinitely."

Esme starts to cry into her hands, with Carlisle walking over to her to pull her into him.

"I don't want to be a burden to anyone, and I'll sign whatever you need me to sign. You won't have to pay me, or anything. I can take care of myself."

Before she could go on, Jasper interrupts. "Bella, we understand that you want to help, but I'm not sure you fully understand it all. You'd have to move back to Forks with us, hun," he says softly, his 'drool-worthy' accent catching Bella's ears for the first time.

Bella remembers back to when she first started to listen to _Twilight_, how she walked into the record store and caught a glimpse of their EP. She'd never forget the day they got signed or the day they started their first headlining tour. She's seen them so many times live; she remembers (very clearly) the way Jasper's accent was accentuated by the microphones in Phoenix.

"Forks?"

"Oh dear," Esme sighs, collecting herself enough to sit down in the chair next to her. "Forks is our hometown, honey. We couldn't let him stay here, in a big town like this. Too much press. When we're in Forks, the family is able to maintain the anonymity that we prefer. We'd have to take Edward back to Forks."

"Where would I live?" Bella asks. "I mean, I could get an apartment I suppose, but it would take a while for me to get my stuff packed up. That's not to mention enough money to move, and get enough for a down payment on an apartment…"

Esme, again, breaks down into tears, and for a second, Bella thinks that maybe she's said the wrong thing again. Something terrible to make Esme cry that way. She's two seconds from apologizing when Esme looks up and grins at her.

"Oh Isabella, you're an angel," she cries, grabbing Bella's hands in her own. "You'll stay in our house, Bella. We wouldn't have it any other way."

"Oh no, I can't impose like that," Bella tries, shaking her head.

Emmett laughs then, followed by Rosalie and Alice, and then finally Jasper. Although she's surprised, she's happy that Emmett isn't telling her that she needs to leave again, or yelling at her again, that's worse than him thinking she can leave.

"Bella," Alice smiles. "The house is huge. It would be more of an imposition if you lived off the grounds. Don't worry about a thing. Emmett can call the movers, and have your apartment packed up in a matter of hours.

"Wait," Rosalie says, standing. "We really shouldn't force her to make this decision so hastily. We should give her a few hours at the _very_ least."

Instead of fighting, and telling the family that she's already made her decision, Bella sighs and nods, looking down at Edward, who has started gripping onto her tighter, now that the amount of pain reliever has been lessened.

"Bella," Carlisle whispers. "You should sleep. We'll be right outside, if there's a problem, just ring the bell, and we'll be here in just a minute."

"Of course," she nods, keeping her hands at her sides, even though all she really wants to do is run them through Edward's hair, and hold him close to her, to calm him down, and help him loosen his grip on her bruised body.

Never in a million years did she ever think that she'd be _here_ one day. Never. If someone had told her that she'd go to a concert that she'd pay too much for the tickets, and that she'd get lost in the underground labyrinth only to find the front man of her favorite band at her feet, slitting his wrists…. She'd never believe them.

Couple that with the fact that she'd carried him, _carried_ him out of the labyrinth and up a flight of stairs, making sure his wrists stayed covered to stop bleeding… No way!

Later that night, as the family slept out in the waiting room, Edward shifts in her arms, and gasps out as his wrist catches on her hospital gown.

"Shh," she coos. "I've got you, Edward."

If someone told Bella that she'd wake up in a hospital bed lying with _Edward_ _Cullen_, she'd have told that someone that they were deranged. If that someone then told her that he would be utterly dependent on her indefinitely, she would have kicked that someone's ass and then told them to get the fuck out of her head.

Alas, here she is, sitting up in the hospital bed, lying with Edward Cullen, his arms draped over her body, his head resting against her chest, seemingly listening to her heart beat. She doesn't know what she's going to do, how she's going to explain to her friends, her boss, her _mother_, but of three things, she's absolutely certain; Edward Cullen, famous rock star, America's "It Boy," needed her, she felt compelled to be with him, to help him, and lastly, that she was most definitely moving to Forks, Washington with the Cullens, and the rest of her favorite band.

*

The doctors come in the next day, to do some tests on her, make sure she could walk around and function after that stunt she'd pulled at the arena. Doctor Crowley says that it was remarkable that she'd been able to climb those stairs with Edward's dead weight. He' tells her that she'd had what's called an 'adrenaline rush,' because she'd been so hyped up.

"You can Google it," Doctor Crowley laughs, winking at her. "In any case, Miss Swan, Edward will be waking up tomorrow afternoon. As I'm sure Carlisle has told you, we're almost positive that he'll have a severe case of what we call 'Superman Complex.' What you'll need to figure out within the next few hours, is whether you will be staying or not, and if so, you'll need to figure out all the other arrangements with his family as well.

"I'm sure Carlisle has explained to you, in great detail, the consequences of both decisions you can make, but as your treating physician, please let me reiterate.

"With S-C, Edward will have what we call 'damsel in distress' symptoms. The only thing I can compare it to that will even come close, is relating Edward's behavior to that of a child. Of course, until tomorrow, we won't be able to judge the severity. When he's awake, I'll be able to give you a better understanding as to what you're up against.

"Please though, Miss Swan, take into consideration that this will be almost certainly a long term thing. He might never recover, not fully anyway."

"I've thought about it as much as I'm going to think about it. I won't let him be hospitalized indefinitely. I'll be here when he wakes up," she nods determinedly, running her hand down his back soothingly.

Doctor Crowley nods, sighing. "From what we saw when you came in, Edward is almost positively going to rely on you for almost everything. At the very least, you'll have to supervise him at all times for at least the first month. That includes showers and everything else.

"The good part about this, if there is a good part, is the fact that he won't fight you, or be evasive with you in anyway," he tells her. "He will be –or in all the cases I've seen before—completely honest with you in every single aspect of his life."

"Why is that?"

"Well, as far as the doctors can figure, it's because he trusts you unconditionally. You've saved him, and therefore, can do no wrong. In his eyes, you can't break that trust, even if you use the information against him in some way.

"Also, that brings me to my next point," he hedges a little, looking up at the clock before back down at Bella.

"Get to the point, ok doc?"

"Actually, uh, Carlisle wanted to discuss this part with you privately. But I thought you'd like to have my opinion on this as well.

"With S-C, in most cases, the D-I-D doesn't exactly know what's happened. Almost always, they don't realize what happens until their person – you—tell them what happened to them. Also in most cases, where their person is still present, they go back to normal, or fall into a normal routine shortly after being released."

"That's great news, isn't it?"

"Well, that's a double-edged sword, Miss Swan."

"I don't think I understand you…" Bella says, looking down at Edward, and then up at the doctor again.

"Edward will go back to being Edward, in time, but first, he'll go through a healing process. In most cases, the process involves extreme depression (with or without their person) extreme violence, mood swings, irritability, sexual frustration, and physical exhaustion.

"During the process, he will need to be monitored, by professionals. The reason I'm telling you this, is because he will expect a certain life style. He will expect _his_ lifestyle. Edward Cullen is America's 'It Boy,' Miss Swan. With that title, he'll expect certain things from you, things he probably had no trouble getting before all this."

Still Bella doesn't know what he's trying to say.

"English, Doctor Crowley."

"Because of the traumatic experience he's gone through, he'll no longer be willing to look outward for what he's previously looked for. In short, you might be asked to… release sexual tension? You'll be the only one he'll trust for a very long time, Miss Swan. With that kind of trust comes a certain amount of responsibility."

Mouth agape, Bella doesn't even notice that Carlisle is standing with a matching expression on his face, staring acidly at Doctor Crowley.

"I think that's enough, Tyler," Carlisle shakes his head. "I hope you're not implying that my son will force himself on her, or that she'll be forced to be sexual with him. Regardless of his complex, I know my son, his strengths, and his weaknesses. You have no right to announce those implications."

"I do _so_, Miss Swan is my patient," Tyler argues, crossing his arms over his chest petulantly. "As is your son. I'm just stating the facts, Carlisle, don't take it personally."

"Gentlemen," Bella speaks up, watching as the fury in Carlisle's eyes intensifies. His eyes are the same color that Edward's were last night, right before he sliced the blade over his skin the first time. When she thinks back to that, she clenches her eyes shut and gasps, heart pounding as she remembers the way the blood oozed out of the wound, the way his skin sliced open so easily.

Both doctors stop in their tracks as the racing beeps of the monitor pull them out of their debate. Carlisle rushes to Bella's side, reaching for her hand.

"Bella, what is it? Talk to me Bella."

When she realizes that she isn't alone, and that she isn't down in that labyrinth again, she sighs with relief, opening her eyes and looking right into Carlisle's. The fiery red color is gone, replaced once again with the light topaz they normally are, this time… laced with concern.

"Are you alright, Miss Swan?" Doctor Crowley asks, checking Bella's vitals again, making sure she's stable.

"I'd like to speak with Carlisle," she tells the doctor. "Please, Doctor Crowley. I appreciate the information you've given me, but for now, I'd like to discuss this with Carlisle."

Carlisle's eyes spark a little, Bella doesn't miss it, but then, she doesn't miss the pride in his eyes after Crowley walks out of their room either.

"I don't think for one minute that you're in any danger around my son," he tells her when they're alone. "I've researched S-C since I've gotten here, and there's been a few, very few, cases where physical violence, or sexual violence, has been recorded."

Thinking about it, Bella looks down at Edward, and her mind automatically thinking things like, _could be worse right? Edward Cullen has been in your fantasies more than once any way right?_ Blushing, she pushes those thoughts away, and looks back up at Carlisle.

"Don't you think that Edward will have some sort of expectations? I mean, he's in a very famous band, no offense, and I'm sure, before this, that his… appetite was…satiated frequently?"

"No offense taken, Bella. My son is not that kind of person. Neither were Emmett or Jasper before their girls came along. We raised all three of them to be gentlemen, and as such, none have taken part in the stereotypical rock star behavior. I assure you, Bella, you have nothing to worry about."

Laughing, Carlisle adds, "In fact, I think under different circumstances, he'd fall in love with someone like you."

Bella laughs too, but it's forced, and fake. _Great_.

"How do I know if he's getting better? What if he…." How does she ask something like, _what if he __does__ fall in love with me_? She shakes her head.

"What Bella? You have nothing to be ashamed of here. Just ask me."

"What if he does fall in love with me? I mean. How do I know it's not just his D-I-D complex?" Blushing, she looks down at Edward's messy tresses, avoiding Carlisle's eyes.

Sighing, Carlisle runs his hand down Bella's cheek, making her look at him. "We'll cross that bridge when we get to it."

Bella doesn't miss how he says 'when' and not 'if.' She tries not to think about it either.

*

The next morning is hectic. Alice has gone to Bella's apartment earlier and packed a few things for her, and helped Emmett and Jasper instruct the movers as to how to pack up the rest. Normally, or under _different_ circumstances, Bella would be embarrassed that two thirds of _Twilight_ was at her apartment. Right now though, she's just happy to have her own clothes so she can clean up, and get dressed.

"Doctor Crowley says we have a few hours before Edward wakes up again and also showed me where staff showers are, if you want to clean up, Esme will stay with Edward while you're away," Alice says, holding Bella's bag.

"Really? Just fifteen minutes," Bella looks over to Esme and sits up on the bed, trying to pry Edward off of her.

Since she's woken up at the hospital, Bella's been out of the bed only in less than five minute intervals, for brief cleaning and bathroom use. Most of the time, Edward has such a strong grasp on her that she doesn't want to get up. _Something I could get used to_, her mind whispers.

"Of course, love," Esme nods. "I'll sit on the bed while you're away. Go, shower, clean up," she waves her hand dismissively.

As Bella gets off the bed, Edward groans, but only until Esme comes and sits down. Alice leads Bella through the hospital, and toward the showers. "Doctor Crowley said you could take the knee brace off for the shower, just try to be careful and don't put a lot of pressure on it, ok? I'll be outside if you need help." Then Alice hands her a make up case filled with mini shampoos and conditioners and soaps. "We're on the road a lot," Alice shrugs. "Use these, and let me know when you're ready to get dressed, I'll be out here, if you need help."

The shower is warm and inviting, and Bella can't remember the last time she'd wanted to shower as bad as she does _right_ now. The water cascades off her back in beads, hot and steamy against her cold, pale skin. Her mind thinks about all the things that are changing in her life, everything she's taking on now. She shampoos her hair, scrubbing at her scalp and the back of her neck, getting rid of the feeling of blood.

She's pretty sure she'll be like Lady Macbeth with this. With the blood on her hands for the rest of her life. That's not something she's looking forward to, but she can't get it off of her mind, doesn't think she ever will.

Conditioning her hair feels like heaven, but that's _nothing_ compared to lathering the soap down her body and scrubbing her skin clean. Relishing in the last few seconds, she's about the turn off the water when she hears, "Bella!"

Flipping off the water and wrapping a towel around her body, Bella runs to Alice, forgetting about her gown and brace, sliding on the tile flooring as she does. "What Alice?"

Alice's face is full of panic, eyes wide with terror. "He's waking up," she whispers worryingly. "We have to get back. Esme just called for us. Hurry, Bella."

Bella realizes now how 'Alice' is synonymous with 'hyperactive.' She grabs Bella's hand in her right and Bella's overnight bag in her left and pulls her toward the hospital room, even though Bella's in nothing but the terry cloth towel limping through a crowded hospital, at an alarmingly fast, and painful, rate.

"Alice," Bella hisses. "I can't go back in this! You're family will be there!"

"You don't have to worry about that," Alice replies back fast, turning down the final hallway. "Just be there for Edward."

They get back to the room, and the first thing Bella sees is Esme in tears, sitting alone on the hospital bed. The second thing she sees is a flash of bronze and pale skin before she's pinned to the ground, a body sprawled on top of her, head buried in the crook of her neck, clinging to her tightly.

"Edward," she whispers, gasping. "You have to let me up, Edward, I can't breathe."

Edward doesn't say anything, but he does help Bella up, watches as Bella tightens the towel around her body self consciously, resting her weight on her good leg as the other already shows signs of new bruising and swelling. He brushes her off, pulling down the bottom hem of her towel, and rubbing at her elbow gently.

"You weren't here," he whispers, wrapping his hands around her waist, practically picking her up off the ground, holding her securely.

As best as she can, she ignores Edward, and looks over Edward's shoulder and asks, "Are you alright, Esme?"

"He just. He. His eyes. He," she stutters, looking at the back of Edward's head.

"As soon as he realized you weren't here, he jumped out and stumbled into the corner," Carlisle says, looking at Edward curiously. "He's woken up a few hours early, and with all that movement, we have to make sure he didn't rip his stitches, Bella. We need to check his vitals."

Esme lets out a cry, and buries her head in her hands. Alice and Rosalie gasp.

"Edward," Bella says. "Apologize to your mother, you hurt her feelings. She's only looking out for you."

Edward looks at her curiously. Bella isn't really sure if Edward will listen, but she keeps a stern look on her face so Edward knows she's serious. "I mean it, Edward."

She looks up to Carlisle, who nods softly, with a weak smile on his face; she's doing the right thing.

Letting her down, Edward reaches for Bella's hand, pulling away from her body, before he laces their fingers, and walks (stumbles) to Esme, reaching out hesitantly, to rest his hand on Esme's shoulder.

"Tell her you're sorry, Edward," Bella pushes, tightening her grasp on his hand reassuringly.

"I'm sorry," he whispers, voice scratchy and groggy from the lack of use.

Esme looks up, blinks, and wipes the tears away from her face. Alice and Rosalie let out a sigh, finally relaxing.

"Oh Edward, it's alright, honey. It's alright. How are you feeling?"

Esme's reaction scares him, and Edward shies back into Bella's shoulder, wrapping his arms around her again. She's still clad only in a towel, but tries not to think about that right now, instead just stands limply in Edward's grasp.

When Esme gets up, fresh tears in her eyes, Carlisle walks over to her, and wraps his arms around her. "Bella, we need to check the bandages."

"I need to get dressed," she says, pointing down at her body.

Emmett laughs, Jasper too, followed shortly by Alice and Rosalie. "Towels suit you, Bella Swan," Emmett winks.

"Thank you, McCarty," Bella scoffs, rolling her eyes. "I'm sure you all got a hell of a show, can I just get dressed now?"

Alice smiles and hands the bag over, looking between her and Edward, a tentative smile on her face.

"Edward," Bella whispers, pulling him away. "I have to put clothes on. I need you to let me go."

"No," he shakes his head, pulling her closer, tighter. "You were gone."

"Edward," she says again, voice crisp. "Let me go. I'm not going away again."

He only shakes his head again.

"Edward, please, I will be right back. I'm going to put some clothes on, in that little room right there, and then I will be right back," she points to the tiny bathroom that the hospital room provides. "I promise I won't leave you again, I just need to get dressed. Can you sit down please?"

Bottom lip trembling, Edward shakes his head, but pulls Bella toward the bathroom, eyes trained on her as he points to the room. He looks pretty adamant about waiting outside the door until she comes out.

"Now," Carlisle says softly, looking at his family. "No one touch him until Bella comes back out."

Edward paces back and forth until Bella opens the bathroom door, fully dressed.

"This was worse than we'd imagined," Doctor Crowley whispers to Carlisle. "It's almost like he's reverted down to the mental state of a child."

"Give him time," Carlisle nods. "He's just woken up, Tyler. Give him time."

*

As it happens, they don't really have much time, not to themselves anyway. Carlisle checks Bella's knee, checking for more damage since the shower, and does a set of ice and stimulation to reduce the pain and swelling. Doctor Crowley does a thousand and one tests on Edward, slowly, because Edward isn't exactly cooperating.

From the second he's been awake, both Crowley and Carlisle have been trying to talk to him, have him answer questions, do tricks, play fetch, play dead. Finally, poor Bella just says, "Enough," and Edward sighs with relief. "Edward's bandages are fine. Edward's vitals are stable. Edward's brain works. Get out! All of you!" Standing up, Bella crosses her arms across her chest, scowling at everyone. "I mean it, everyone out!"

Carlisle looks up, away from Edward for the first time since he's pulled the electrodes off her patella. He looks surprised, ridiculously so… but Bella stays serious.

"Carlisle, you're _overwhelming_ him. His heart is _racing_. You need to let him rest." Her eyes are hard and demanding, and it's in that instant that Carlisle knows she's right. Not only that she was _right_, but that she could – and would – be able to help his son.

As soon as the room empties, Edward sighs in relief and lies back on the bed, holding onto his chest, as if to stop his heart from racing out of his ribcage. He looks utterly uncomfortable, tired, pained, confused, terrified. When Bella walks up to him, she sits next to him, curling one leg underneath her, the other dangling over the bed in the brace as she looks him over. His eyes are closed tight and his chest is heaving.

"Edward," she whispers, reaching over to run her hand through his hair. "Hey, are you ok?" When he doesn't answer, Bella starts to card her fingers through his hair, in a slow, steady, rhythm.

Eventually, his eyes open, and he looks directly in Bella's brown eyes. He doesn't say anything, but his breathing is almost back to normal, his cheeks are as flushed, and he's seemingly more relieved.

"Do you remember what happened?" she asks cautiously, keeping eye contact with him, hands stilling in his hair. He shakes his head 'no,' and she sighs, breaking eye contact. "You took a box cutter to both of your wrists, Edward. You slashed open your skin so many times that you almost died. You could have died."

Edward's eyes are wide, _shock_, Bella thinks, but she doesn't stop carding her fingers through his hair.

"You're not dead, though, love, you're still here, and look," she reaches for his arms, smiling at the bandages. "Still in one piece, too."

Bella can tell he's got questions, she can see it in his eyes, but knows he's got a lot to process, so she just keeps talking to try to explain it all out.

"I found you in the room, before you made the first cut, and tried to stop you. I couldn't, obviously, but I helped you up, and with Jasper's and Emmett's help, we got you here. Your parents came out right away. They were so worried about you.

"Edward," she says quietly, and this is where she's unsure. Does she tell him? Does she keep it a secret? She isn't sure, but since all of this began, she's followed her head, and her heart, so now, with her heart telling her to tell him, she does. "You have what Doctor Crowley calls 'Superman Complex,'," his eyebrows furrow, like he's trying to understand, and then it comes to her. "Oh! Before _Twilight_ you were in med school, right? Emphasis on psychology?" He doesn't respond, but she continues, "Superman Complex is a result of what you did. You'll uh, rely on me, because I saved you, or something. We don't know how long it will last, or what the severity of your case is yet, that's what your dad and Doctor Crowley were trying to figure out."

"They ask too many questions," Edward whispers.

"I know right?" Bella laughs, taking his hand. "They'll be asking tons of questions all the time. If you want them to go away, just tell me, and I'll make them leave."

"Don't go away please? You were gone," he says softly, pouting his lips and sitting up, reaching to rest his head on her shoulder, his arms around her waist again.

"I'm here now, Edward. I'm here now."

Edward's grasp on her tightens minutely, and for some reason, Bella relishes in it. She knows that she most definitely should not want to feel the way her heart is feeling right now.

-------------------------------------

a/n: this project is kind of my _baby_. The term "Superman Complex" is completely my own fabricated diagnosis. I have no medical background, although, I'm asking a psycho psych major if things do make sense. Many, many thanks to **­­**_**the­-glory-days**_, as _always_, for kicking me in the ass every time I stop writing. Updates will be few and far between, but because they're so much longer than my other chapter updates, I hope that's alright with you guys.

**Reviews are appreciated. I'd love to hear your feedback :]**


	2. Chapter 2

Edward Cullen is a rock star in the biggest band of the decade. He's America's "It Boy," but he's still unhappy. Will Bella be in time to save him? AH AU

**Disclaimer:** Stephanie Meyer is the genius who created _Twilight_; I'm just toying around with her characters.

_Superman Complex_

The flight back to Port Angeles is ridiculously nerve-wracking for Edward, and in turn, Bella as well. Because of who he is, and the status he holds, getting out of the hospital, and into the airport unseen is virtually impossible.

They'd almost gotten to security unnoticed when a girl, maybe seventeen years old, comes up and jumps right in front of Edward and Bella, effectively stopping the two. Edward instantly cowers into Bella's side, gasping and tightening his hold on her hand as the fan grins and begs for a photograph.

"Please, Edward, just one photo? My friends will never believe that I saw you!" the girl gushes, holding up her camera.

In that instant, Bella is really happy that she'd helped Edward dress in his long sleeve Henley and leather jacket this morning, effectively covering his wrists and bandages. In fact, he doesn't look at all different to anyone, or at least… the girl hadn't noticed yet.

Bella steps in front of Edward slightly, grinning at the girl and taking her sunglasses off. "Sorry sweetie, no pictures today, maybe an autograph instead?"

"Excuse you?" The girl says, affronted that she is being rebuffed, probably. "Who exactly do you think you are? I just asked for a picture."

"And I said no," Bella says back, firmly, stepping further in front of Edward. "Look, he's not feeling good today, major headache, and I said no. If you have a pen or something he'll autograph whatever you want."

The girl still looks pretty pissed off, but noticing that Edward was letting this _woman_ call the shots, she puts her camera in her bag and pulls out a notebook with doodles on the front.

"School notebook?" Bella asks the girl. The girl nods, smiling as she hands the sharpie over.

"It's my anatomy notebook, I'm a senior."

"What's your name, so Edward can write out the autograph properly?"

"Jenny," she grins. "Just Jenny though, yeah?"

"Ok, Just Jenny," Bella winks, turning around to Edward. She hands him the pen, and even as his hand shakes, she helps steady him whispering for him to write out an autograph for the girl.

Once the autograph has been written out, Bella beams with pride and runs her hand down Edward's arm thoughtfully. She looks up at him and whispers, "We're almost home," soft, just for him.

When she turns around, she re links her hand with Edward's once more and hands back the autographed notebook.

_Dearest Jenny,_

_Thank you for your kind understanding. Twilight is blessed to have fans like you. Hope to see you soon._

_xo __**Edward Cullen**_

The girl looks down fast, reading it swiftly, and then looks up with a glistening smile on her face. "Oh goodness, thank you so much, Edward! You've made my _year_." The girl stops and holds her hand out for Bella to shake. "Thank you," Jenny says, looking at Bella. "I'm sorry about snapping. My show got cancelled a few days ago, and I flew all the way here from New York. I'm a little edgy."

"No matter," Bella smiles, shaking Jenny's hand. "I'm Bella, by the way. Thank you for your understanding."

"Anytime Bella!" she grins. "Totally. I've been _Twilighted_ before, so… I'm not too upset. Hopefully you guys will be touring again soon right?" She looks back at Edward, but Bella quickly intervenes.

"Nothing is certain quite yet. Keep an eye on the myspace, though, right? The band will update as soon as there's something new to report."

Jenny waves and watches as Bella and Edward finally get past security, where Bella smiles and rubs her thumb soothingly over Edward's hand. She brings her other hand up to his cheek and smiles, rubbing at his jaw bone. "Almost home," she tells him again, pride seeping from her whole body. "You're doing so great."

Emmett, Rosalie, Jasper, Alice, Carlisle, and Esme had come into the waiting area all unscathed and anonymous, which pisses Bella off to no end. _How come she and Edward got stopped?_ She shakes herself out of her reverie and brings her hand down from Edward's cheek, staring up into his eyes. "Are you going to be nice to your family today?" she asks softly, just for him. "It will break your mother's heart if you ignore her. She just wants to speak with you."

"Too much talking," Edward says quietly, looking over to the group before looking back at Bella. "I don't want to talk."

"Alright Edward," Bella sighs, smiling sadly at him before turning and walking up to the group.

"Why is it that Edward was the only one recognized?" Bella asks, looking at Emmett and Jasper. She notices how they all laugh, even Alice and Rosalie.

"Edward's never had the best luck," Jasper smiles weakly, looking at Bella with a smile. "You handled that fan brilliantly though. We thought for a second that we'd need to come bail you out when the girl insisted, but…"

"You're a natural," Alice grins, winking. "Just like us of course," she points to Rosalie and herself. Bella can't help but shake her head. She wants to say something like, _except I'm not fucking my Twilighter._ But that doesn't seem appropriate, especially in front of Carlisle and Esme, so she doesn't.

Edward's hand tightens on hers, and Bella thinks maybe she _did_ say it out loud, but no one else looks at her differently, so she turns to see that Edward is looking toward the loading gate, where everyone from first class is lining up.

"We get on the plane before anyone else," Carlisle tells the group. "Security and anonymity precautions of course. Good looking out, Edward." Everyone looks up at Edward, as if they're expecting him to say something, and poor Bella sees how Edward cringes. He surprises her though.

"Just want to get home, Dad."

It's not the first time he's spoken to anyone besides Bella, but it _is_ the first time he's said anything without coaxing, _and_ used a title, _Dad_. Bella sees the tears in Carlisle's eyes, coupled with the tears in Esme's, but doesn't comment on it.

"Me too, Edward. Me too," Carlisle nods, heading toward the gate to hand over their tickets. Bella hands over Edward's and her own, and waits for the flight attendant to hand them back, directing for them to follow Carlisle and the rest of the group.

The car ride from the hospital to the airport was almost impossible for Bella. With the way her heart's been fluttering in her chest to the way her face heats up every time Edward says anything to her… well, when he practically _climbs_ into her lap and pushes his face into her neck for comfort, she's close to losing it.

She has no idea how the plane ride is going to fare for Edward's condition, but knows that Carlisle has something to put him to sleep if it gets to be too much. It's terrifying for her because she calms him down by whispering to him, and by running her hands down his back, and through his hair. But that's only when they're alone. She doesn't know how she's supposed to do it with Alice, Rosalie, Emmett, Jasper, Esme, and Carlisle watching. It's personal, and secretive, and she doesn't know how the family will take it.

She doesn't get much of a choice, because when the attendant comes back to check the seatbelts, he freaks out and does exactly what he did in the car. She can hear Esme making some excuse, and thinks she hears the words _just married_, so she smiles, and giggles appropriately and cards her fingers through Edward's hair.

It's only partly for show.

The attendant winks and nods, leaving the _Twilight_ party to themselves for the remainder of the flight. Edward, as soon as the plane had taken off and the lights stopped flashing for seat belts, had taken his off, lifted the arm rest, and moved both himself, and Bella, so that they were both comfortable.

"Ok?" he asks quietly, looking down at her. For a second, it's only them, and no one is around to watch the exchange.

"Yes, Edward, this is fine," she nods, a little confused. This time, Edward's pulled her so that she was leaning into him, her head on his chest, her leg brace propped up on the seat she was just sitting in. His head is resting on top of hers, softly. It is usually the other way around, but Bella couldn't say she minded.

Edward doesn't say anything else, but he does wrap his arms around Bella protectively, linking their fingers together. He falls asleep shortly after positioning them and Bella heaves a sigh of relief.

"Tired?" Alice asks, catching Bella's eyes.

"You don't even know," Bella laughs nervously. "Security was ridiculous."

"Did he totally freak?" Emmett asks. "Edward _hates_ security at airports."

"We got to the gate and he totally stiffened up, like he didn't want to go through it. As if that wasn't bad enough, they tried to separate us, so they could do the checks, and he almost went insane. I convinced the guard to keep us together. The guard was totally pissed off, man. But when they started patting Edward down, he started whimpering, it was so sad."

Esme gasps, covering her mouth, and Bella gives her a weak smile.

"He endured though," she smiles proudly. "That's a step, right Carlisle? For him to endure?"

"Yes," Carlisle nods. "For Edward to have the control to do it, to be uncomfortable and stand it, for however long a period of time, is a very big step forward. Although, at this point, he's not doing it for himself."

"What do you mean?" Alice asks. All eyes look to Carlisle, everyone just as confused as Alice.

"He's doing it for Bella," Carlisle answers shortly. "He's doing it for her, because of the looks she gives him. Tyler said that people with cases of S-C are very visual, and tend to base their decisions on the facial expressions and body language of their person.

"When he starts to defy you," Carlisle grins. "Then we're _really_ making progress."

Bella wakes up with a start, to the sounds of Edward singing under his breath. She can't make out the words, but she knows its _Your Haven is My Home_, from their EP. It's not surprising, not so much as it is a little unnerving, because the song has lyrics like, _my eyes aren't the only parts of me undressing you now_, and _welcome to my inner mind, my inner hell, you'll never get out alive_. This very song is the song that made Bella start listening to the EP in the first place. It's the song they _never_ sing live anymore. It's the song Edward is singing to her in a plane… back to his house in Forks… after his suicide attempt.

When she cracks her eyes open, she sees that everyone is asleep, everyone except for Rosalie, who's carefully sculpting her nails into perfection. Bella moves slowly in his arms and turns up to watch him smile as he stops singing. "No," she whispers. "Don't stop singing please, I love that song."

"You know it?" Edward asks, looking at her curiously. He doesn't start singing again, but he does start moving his hands around, his fingers dancing on her ribs like he's playing the piano. Bella tries to remember the way the song sounds, when he plays it acoustically, with just the piano, while Jasper plays the guitar, and Emmett claps steadily, to keep the beat. The way his fingers are moving on her body are in time with the words he was singing. Her ribs are his new piano.

"It's my favorite song," she tells him. "It's the song that made me listen to your EP in the first place, all those years ago." She moves to sit up just a little, not enough for Edward to panic, just enough for her to grab her bag, and her iPod. She holds it out in front of him, lets him see it, and places one of the ear buds in his ear, so he can listen while she puts the other in her own ear.

"Listen," she whispers, turning the iPod onto _Your Haven is my Home_, done acoustically, a demo they never put on CD. She grins, leaning back against him as his fingers play her ribs again, and closes her eyes, facing in toward the seats.

Rosalie, done with her nails, looks at the two of them, sees the smiles and the blush on Bella's cheeks, and shakes her head. Someone is going to get hurt because of all this. And when that time comes, she's going to be the very first to say, "I told you so."

Eventually, Rosalie turns her attention away from Edward and Bella, and back to her nails, nudging for Emmett to wake up so that he can be a sense of reason for those two.

Bella hears Rosalie huff, and thinks maybe she's being inappropriate, because as far as she can tell, Rosalie doesn't huff like that to anyone else, not anyone else in the family anyway.

She takes out the ear bud just in time to catch Rosalie's head turning. Bella sighs and moves to sit up, thankfully pulled out of reverie with Edward Cullen. There isn't any good that can come out of being Edward's piano. Not for her anyway, and it isn't fair to pretend that it ever will change.

She can't let her heart become a traitor, not now, not when she's relying on it to agree with her head about things. She needs to stay focused, and think carefully about the steps she's taking to get Edward safely toward his recovery.

Edward gets this confused look on his face, assuming he did something bad, Bella thinks, and takes the ear bud out of his ear, handing it back. "I'm sorry," he whispers. "Don't go away."

That's like a pinch, finally, for her pulling her away from herself, and she's back in her role again, being there for Edward. "No, you didn't do anything wrong, Edward," she tells him, putting her hand on his cheek, making him look at her. "You didn't do anything wrong, I swear! Ok? You're doing so great, Edward, so great."

Edward smiles lightly, and Bella thinks it's time to maybe make some boundary lines, if only for herself. She needs to make sure she doesn't cross anymore lines.

"We're about thirty minutes from landing," Emmett whispers, looking at Bella and Edward curiously. Bella watches his eyes dart back from hers to Edward's face, and then back again. She drops her hand from Edward's face, suddenly aware that others are able to watch, and turns around to lay back into him, rubbing her fingers softly against Edward's leg, out of the way of wandering eyes.

She doesn't think Emmett would understand that she has only honorable intentions with Edward Cullen. Actually, if Bella thinks about it, she doesn't know if any of them know much of anything about her at all. The whole family is being so trusting, opening their home to her… and here she is, thinking about being Edward's piano.

She's hit with a huge wave of guilt when she looks at the sleeping forms of Esme and Carlisle. She sighs, a blush on her cheeks and looks down. _How can she feel the way she feels when they're putting their lives on hold to welcome her?_

Edward's arms wrap around her tighter, again, pulling her out of her own mind, and back into Edward's world.

"What's wrong?" she asks, looking up at him. He looks at her, then darts his eyes over to Emmett, who's still looking at him. "It's just Emmett, Edward. You know Emmett. He's been your best friend for two and a half decades."

Emmett laughs, "Just how much do you know about us, Swan?"

Bella blushes, immediately looking down. Edward growls a little, quietly, which makes Bella laugh, because _he's_ trying to protect _her_. "Edward," she whispers, nudging him. "Don't be rude. I'm fine."

She looks back up at Emmett and stares him straight in the eye. "I've been a fan of your band since before you got signed to Atlantic," she says proudly. "I have all the CD's, DVD's, and all the unreleased demos." She doesn't blink once, and Alice, who was quiet before, giggles. "What I'm not ashamed to admit it."

"Me too!" She laughs. "I was such a fan girl before I met Jasper. Honestly!"

Jasper confirms this with a snort, looking at Bella. "You don't even know, Bella. She was such a little brat about it. I mean, you'd think, if she met me, that she'd want to talk to me and like... get to know me, but no. Alice played the indifferent card, and totally rebuffed me."

"Damn straight," she smiles, leaning over to kiss Jasper's cheek. "We were at the same party, but when I saw him, I just smiled and said hello. He came to me."

"And the first time I went to her house and saw her room, I was totally assaulted with _Twilight_ merchandise. I mean, posters of my face blown up on her ceiling. I swear, I didn't even know she was a fan until then."

"I had creepy pillowcase covers," Alice grins proudly. "I was the _worst_ type of fan. But meeting him," she shrugs. "I just changed, I guess. Everything I said I'd do when I met them, I didn't do. Didn't help that Edward and I got on so well. I mentioned one thing about his piano solo for _Soles and True Believers_ and _wham_, instant friendship."

As soon as she stops, Alice gasps, covering her mouth up like she's said something wrong. "Oh, Edward. I. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-"

"Alice, you don't have to apologize," Bella says. "It's not like he doesn't remember everything, right, Edward?"

He nods, and pulls Bella closer, and whispers, "I remember." It's enough for Bella, and when Bella smiles, and sends a wink Alice's way, Alice's expression softens.

There's a minute of almost awkward silence, and then Emmett says, "So which one of us is your favorite, Swan?"

"I never had a favorite."

Alice and Rosalie look at her like she's crazy and ask, "What?"

"I never had a favorite, really. I mean, all three of you are good looking,"_ definitely not a lie—total understatement--,_ "sure, but your music is why I started listening to you," _not a lie_, "I liked your music before I even knew what you looked like, so… by the time I saw your faces, your instruments meant more than your looks."

Jasper and Emmett both have their mouths open, gawking at Bella like she's got a third eye. "What?" she asks.

"Either you're actually telling the truth, or you're a brilliant liar."

Bella lifts her head up high, smug, and grins, leaning back into Edward. She can feel his chest rolling with silent laughter, amused with her expression. When she looks up at him, he leans down and says, "You're pretty."

Bella's cheeks flame up.

"Oh she's good," Emmett says, Jasper nods, adding, "Edward's totally your favorite, isn't he?"

"He is _now_," Bella groans. "He's the only one that doesn't tease me."

"Oh, come on," Rosalie rolls her eyes. "Don't try to tell me that you've never thought about fucking him?"

"Rosalie Hale!" Alice gasps.

"What? Don't look at me like that, Alice. I mean, honestly."

Edward tightens his arms around Bella and stares at Rosalie pointedly. Rosalie sighs and tosses her hands up. "Ok, Jesus, I'm sorry, Bella. I didn't mean it." She looks up at Edward and says, "Happy now?"

Edward puts on a tiny smile and looks down at Bella again, squeezing her tightly.

When they all get out of the plane a little while later, Bella's cheeks are still red with embarrassment. She groans as she lifts her carryon to put over her shoulder, trying to help Edward with his as well.

Edward, regardless of his condition, is still very much a gentleman, and takes both his and her bag, and places them on his own shoulders effortlessly. She grins up at him and says, "What a gentleman!"

"Expect nothing less," Jasper smiles. "Esme and Carlisle raised us all. We're nothing if not gentlemen."

Edward doesn't comment, but smiles and takes Bella's hand so they can get out of the airport.

"Sleepy," he whispers, leaning down to her level to say it close to her ear. "Can we go to sleep when we get home?"

"If you want to take a nap, Edward, you can take a nap," Bella nods, helping him through the plane. Emmett and Rosalie go first, then after, Carlisle and Esme follow. Next are Alice and Jasper, leaving only Edward and Bella on the plane.

Hopefully going last means going through without being recognized, but Bella doesn't hold her breath. It's a good thing she doesn't, because they take less than ten steps off the plane when Bella hears, "Oh my god! It's Edward Cullen!"

Edward cringes, pulling his sunglasses down to shield his eyes and groans, more like whimpers. Bella does what she can, but really, the girl – the fan – is running toward them, camera in hand.

"Oh Edward! You're my hero, I'm so happy to see you; my friends just won't believe it! Can I get a picture? I thought you were touring? Did you cancel the rest? Are you ok? Is Emmett? Jasper? Edward? Are you ok? Edward?"

Finally, Bella holds her hand up and shakes her head, stepping further in front of Edward. "I'm really sorry, but we aren't doing pictures today."

"I didn't say I wanted _your_ picture, did I?" The girl sneers, lifting her camera and scoffing as she looks at Bella.

"Hun, I'm sorry, we, and when I say _we_," Bella clarifies, using hand quotations. "I mean Edward," she says sarcastically. "Aren't doing pictures today."

"Who died and made you his bodyguard?" the girl asks, laughing, camera still held high. "I'd probably kill myself if I had to put up with you."

"Alright, that's enough," Bella growls, seriously two seconds from slapping the girl in the face. "I said no, and unless you want me to break that silly little camera of yours, you'll walk away."

"You wish," the girl counters, finger ready to take the picture if she gets the opportunity.

Just as the girl goes to click the picture, Bella raises her hand up, snatches the camera out of the girl's hand and holds it close to her, Edward cowering behind her.

"What's your name?" Bella asks, looking around. "Your full name."

"You little bitch!" the girl screams, launching toward Bella, knocking her back into Edward. Then, Edward does something quickly, picking Bella up and cradling her in his arms safely, staring daggers at the fan.

Bella gasps, and squeaks, but holds tight to the camera. "Edward," she whispers, looking at him, then around for some help. She doesn't recognize anyone in the area, and knows that they're on their own. "Edward, you'll hurt your wrists. I'm ok, put me down."

Reluctantly, he does, and _when_ he does, Bella holds the camera out for the girl.

"I'm going to say this once," Bella says slowly. "I won't repeat myself, and if you interrupt me, I'll stop, flat out. I don't forget faces, little girl. I don't, and I won't forget yours. You," Bella seethes. "If I ever see _you_ again, I will have you removed from the premises. Any show you're at, any restaurant, I will have you removed."

"What gives you that right?"

"Well, the fact that you just physically assaulted us, gives me a start. Harassment gives that start a push, and then your attitude gives that push the right."

"You. You. You can't!" she gasps. "Edward, tell her she can't do this to me, please!"

"Hey," Bella says. "I won't say that again, but next time I see you, you'll regret today, _Jane_." Bella tosses the camera back to the girl. "Your name is etched into your SLR, I won't forget it."

Bella turns around swiftly, looking up at Edward with a smile, letting him know that everything's alright, and then walks away from Jane, hand linked in Edward's, toward baggage claim.

They finally get there, and Emmett and Jasper look almost frantic. "Where were you? What took you so long?" Jasper asks, looking them over. "Everything ok?"

"We're fine," Bella nods. "Another fan."

She barely even gets the words out of her mouth before she's being pushed to the ground, a loud scream of the unknown person behind her, pushing down awkwardly, on her bad leg. Bella doesn't cry out, just looks up to make sure Edward's alright. His eyes are glistening with tears behind his sunglasses; he looks shocked, scared, confused, and hesitant.

"You can't take them away from me, you horrible woman!" Jane screams, her whole body trembling with anger. "You can't!"

By that time, Emmett has the girl's arms restrained, holding her back, and Jasper is helping Bella off the floor, trying to keep the fan's attention off of Edward's shaking body.

When security arrives, they restrain the girl with handcuffs and cart her away, the whole time, she's babbling about getting Bella back for this.

When she's gone, Bella tries to put weight down on her leg, but finds that the pain is excruciating, and almost falls; Edward is there instantly, pulling her into his arms, cradling her body with his strong embrace.

"Bella," he whimpers, nuzzling his face into her hair. "Oh Bella."

"Don't jostle her, Edward," Carlisle warns softly, hands held out in front of him, just so Edward knows he doesn't mean any harm. "Keep her steady or you'll hurt her."

Bella shakes her head and makes Edward look at her. "You won't hurt me, Edward. I know you won't." Her hands wrap steadily around Edward's neck and she rubs her thumb over the fine hairs at the nape of it. "Am I too heavy?"

For the first time since the ordeal, Edward's lips crack up into a smile. He shakes his head and tightens his grasp.

"Edward," Carlisle says softly, hands still up. "You must be careful. Your wrists are stitched, if you rub them the wrong way, they'll rip. Don't exert yourself."

Bella looks up at Edward, but he shakes his head and pulls Bella closer to his body, holding her to him that much tighter. "Edward, if it hurts, put me down, ok?"

Alice intervenes before Edward can tell her no, "Oh Bella, you probably hate us now, don't you?" she asks, looking up at her with sad eyes.

"What?"

"With the fans and everything, and now that you're hurt. Please don't say you hate us."

"Alice," Bella stops her. "I could never hate you, I'll be fine. Honestly, this could have been so much worse. I mean, she could have gotten pictures and sold them to the press!"

"You silly girl," Emmett shakes his head. "Pictures, press, we can handle that. What we couldn't handle, was if you got more hurt than you already are."

"He's right, honey," Esme says, chiming in. "We deal with press every day. We don't care about that. But you… that we _do_ care about."

Bella blushes, resting her head against Edward's shoulder.

"We need to get back to the house so I can take a look at Bella's leg."

"I've had enough of airports for a while," Jasper nods. "Bella, I'll get our bags, Emmett can get Edward's. The cars are already waiting outside."

The drive, for Bella, is the worst. Her leg is throbbing, not to mention swelling at the knee cap, and black and yellow all around the surrounding area. She doesn't complain though, because compared to her pain, Edward looks terrible. He's still rigid, stiff as a board.

He's still shaking, and on edge from the encounter, and nothing Bella is trying is calming him down at all. He's got one hand laced with hers, holding her to him tightly, and the other gripping onto the shoulder strap of their carry on bag.

"Edward," she whispers quietly. "Please just relax, I'm ok."

He doesn't.

"He'll probably be like that for a while, Bella," Carlisle says. "It had to be quite a shock for him, tenfold, because the girl was hurting _you_. He's utterly dependant on you right now, and for him, your well being and safety is of the most importance."

Bella nods, combing her fingers through Edward's hair. "Everything is going to be just fine," she whispers to him. "I swear it."

Finally, the car pulls up to the Cullen Estate, and up to the front doors.

"Bella, I think you should have Edward show you to his room, so that he can relax and sleep for a while, to calm him down. He knows the way."

"About that," Bella blushes, looking up at Carlisle. "Where _am_ I to sleep?"

"Tyler said that he probably won't leave your side, and from what happened today, and at the hospital, I'm going to agree. You're welcome to stay in the guest bedroom, but then, alternately, you can stay in Edward's as well."

"Oh Carlisle," Esme tsks. "Of course you'll get your own bedroom, sweetheart. Don't listen to him. A girl's got a right to a bit of privacy, don't you think?" she asks, Bella's pretty sure it's a rhetorical question though, so she doesn't answer. "Anyway, Alice and I will get the room across the hall from Edward's made up for you while you get him to relax."

"Esme?" Jasper asks. "Isn't there a room joined to Edward's by a bathroom? Don't you think that would be a better room for Bella?"

"Oh Jazz," Alice grins. "That's perfect."

"Well, then it's settled," Esme says decisively. "It will be private when you need it, but close enough, and open enough so that you can be together quickly if you need to."

"Thank you," Bella smiles, shifting in Edward's arms as they all stand idly in front of the house. "Edward? Show me to your room?"

She knows she's probably heavy, and even worse going up the stairs, but Edward makes it look effortless.

"You should get some sleep," she tells him. "Come on, put me down, I'll be ok."

"No," Edward shakes his head.

"Edward, really hun, I'm fine."

Again, "no", and then he walks them both over to the bed, propping her up against the headboard as he crawls over her to rest his head on her lap. He grabs her hand, linking their fingers together softly, loosely, and sighs with relief. His body is still tense, but as Bella starts to rub his shoulders, running her free hand over his shirt, he begins to relax, slowly.

"Don't leave me," he whispers, grasping her hand a little tighter, just briefly. "Please don't go."

"I won't go until you tell me to, Edward," Bella says honestly. "And even then, it will be hard to get rid of me."

"I'll never ask you to leave," Edward says earnestly, and with this his whole body relaxes as he kisses her palm, yawning.

He's asleep soundly a few minutes later, but Bella can't find that kind of solace, not with her leg throbbing like it is. She knows that there's no way in hell she'd try to move Edward now that he's asleep so soundly, but also realizes that she _needs_ Carlisle to look at it.

"Carlisle," she sighs, groaning as the leg twitches involuntarily.

Almost as if he's heard her, Carlisle knocks, then comes in, medical bag in hand.

"Would it be ok to take a look at our leg now, Bella?"

Nodding, Bella sighs again, looking down at Edward and shrugging.

"I'll make do with what I've got. Are you comfortable like this?"

"Yes, for the most part," she nods. "Just generally uncomfortable because of the leg. Otherwise, I'm alright."

"Good, I'll have Emmett bring the electric-stimulation machine up with an ice pack after I take a look at what we're dealing with here. I can always give you some pain meds too, if you want them."

After removing the brace and carefully looking over the knee, he clears Bella of all her worry, "Nothing else seemed to tear, and it doesn't look like anything's broken, just that you landed wrong. It will be uncomfortable, but otherwise, you were very lucky. Now, I'll be back in a few minutes with the e-stim."

Carding her fingers through Edward's hair, Bella leans her head back against the head board and lets her eyes slip shut, relaxing until Carlisle comes back. When he does, Bella doesn't notice until the ice bag is resting on her knee. She gasps, eyes flying open, before she ducks her head and blushes.

"Didn't mean to startle you," Carlisle grins. "Emmett's on his way up with the machine."

Nodding, Bella smiles, and then Emmett's there, plugging it in for Carlisle, standing off to the side.

"Now, I'll set it for twenty minutes, and when it's done, it will go off automatically. I'll come up around that time to get all that off of you, and then you can sleep. The ice should help the swelling go down."

Emmett grins at Bella. "So, airport security called, the girl says you threatened her life."

"I just told her that if I ever saw her again, I'd have her removed from the premises. I didn't threaten her life."

"Well, in any case, she's no a repeat offender, so they let her go. You scared her pretty bad," he laughs. "Good work."

They leave shortly after, leaving her alone with Edward for a while. Tilting her head back gain, Bella lets her eyes flutter closed, resting once again as the tiny electric jolts play a steady rhythm on her leg.

She falls asleep, and reams about what life would be like with Edward Cullen if he wasn't an S-C patient…. But even her subconscious can't quite finish the thought.

The machine goes off while Bella slumbers on, and even as Carlisle pulls the sticky pads off of her skin, she doesn't wake. He leaves the machine off to the side of the room, and carefully moves both Bella and Edward so that they'll be more comfortable in their sleep.

Bella wakes up with two strong arms wrapped around her, cradling her into a rock hard body, relaxed and asleep around her. When she cracks her eyes open, she sighs, letting her mind wander off… just this once.

She moves her hands down his chest, imagining just what they'd feel like if he was bare-chested, lying next to her. Her phalanges tickling down the toned muscles of his torso, feeling every outline, memorizing every ridge.

She gets down to his belly, and then starts to feel pretty pervy, feeling up a sleeping man, but brushes her palms over his hips, just once, planning on bringing her hands back up afterward.

…what? She couldn't help it if his hips called to her palms; they have minds of their own.

So, she brushes her hands over the bones slowly, and right as she's about to stop, bring her hands up like she promised herself, Edward giggles.

All out giggles.

"Edward Cullen, are you awake?" Bella asks, pinching at his hipbones. When he shakes his head 'no' and giggles again, Bella asks, "Are you ticklish?"

"Yes!" he answers, giggling louder now that Bella's tickling Edward's side mercilessly. He screams out, thrashing about ridiculously, trying to escape her prying fingers, but fails, as Bella laughs back to him.

"Does it tickle?" she asks, laughing evilly as she waggles her eyebrows maniacally at him. He groans, still laughing, gaping for breath as he tries to get away.

"Edward!" Alice screams, covering her mouth as the whole family piles into the room, to find out when he was screaming.

Bella gasps, her hands instantly stopping their prior attack.

"Are you alright, Bella?" Carlisle asks. "What happened?"

Bella blushes deeply and pushes herself up, watching as the moment disintegrates before her eyes. Edward cowers, groaning, as he hides behind her, still catching his breath.

"Everything is fine," Bella answers, still not meeting anyone's eyes. "Edward is ticklish."

Esme laughs out, covering her mouth with her hand until Alice joins in, both of them giggling together at the door frame.

"Is that really appropriate, Bella?" Rosalie asks, crossing her arms over her chest. "I mean, we thought he was in pain."

Bella instantly shies down, looking at her lap; blush heating up even more, "I'm sorry."

"No," Carlisle says. "Don't be sorry for making my son laugh or smile. Don't ever be sorry for that." He looks over at Rosalie and shakes his head. "Rosalie, whether you agree or not, Bella is part of this family now, so deal with it on your own. She doesn't feel bad for making Edward happy."

"No, Carlisle, she's right," Bella says. "I should have been more considerate. I mean, you all thought the worst, and that was my fault."

"No dear," Esme intervenes. "You mustn't ever apologize for making him smile that way, not even when you scare us."

"Too much talking," Edward whispers, pulling Bella close.

"That's not very polite, Edward," Bella chides. "They just want to make sure you're safe."

Edward shrugs, pulling her closer, his arms winding around her tightly, yet careful of the stitches.

"It's alright, sweetheart," Esme says, pulling the family out of the bedroom. "When you wake up, we'll order pizza. For now, just rest."

They leave, closing the door behind them, and Edward exhales in relief. He pulls Bella close, molding his body to hers, and kisses her forehead, leaving his lips to linger on her skin as he falls back to sleep.

Bella wonders how long her heart is going to play along with this game; let her head make all the right decisions before it goes AWOL and starts thinking for itself. She really doubts that she has that kind of self-control, to stop herself when her heart starts calling the shots.

She hopes she has enough time to build some boundary lines before that time comes.

-------------------------------------

a/n: this project is kind of my baby. The term "Superman Complex" is completely my own fabricated diagnosis. I have no medical background, although, I'm asking a psych major if things do make sense. Many, many thanks to **­­**_**the­-glory-days**_, as always, for kicking me in the ass every time I stop writing. Updates will be few and far between, but because they're so much longer than my other chapter updates, I hope that's alright with you guys.

**Reviews are appreciated. I'd love to hear your feedback :]**


	3. Chapter 3

Edward Cullen is a rock star in the biggest band of the decade. He's America's "It Boy," but he's still unhappy. Will Bella be in time to save him? AH AU

**Disclaimer:** Stephanie Meyer created _Twilight_; I'm just toying around with her characters.

_Superman Complex_

Bella hopes tonight will help shape the mold of what life will be like for her for a while. She and Edward have a hell of a lot to figure out, and as Esme and Alice work to clean up the adjacent room, she and Edward rest. No more tickling, no more laughing, just resting. She's extra cautious of the fact that his wrists are bandaged tight, and that her leg is braced, but beside all that she also is trying to think about how her life is going to change here, very, very quickly.

At the hospital, she gave her mother a half-assed excuse as to where she was going, and why, and now that she's gone, she knows she's going to have to call and give her a better explanation, she's kind of dreading it.

With Edward's head in her lap, she cards her hands through his hair and pulls out her cell phone, and calls her mother.

When Renee answers, Bella says hello cheerfully, and Renee doesn't sound too upset, or too worried, so she tries to just act normal.

"So why did you have to pack up and leave so quickly? Owe somebody money?" her mother teases.

"No, Mom, god," Bella laughs. "I just got offered a job up north, tutoring, and… well, mom it's going to be so awesome, I just got settled, and. It's so beautiful up here, only a few hours from Dad, and it pays well, and for once, I'll get to use my knowledge for the reason I got it," she says brightly. Renee's weakness is Bella's happiness, and Bella knows it. She's betting on it.

"Well, honey, as long as you don't turn into a hermit up there, like your father. Well. You'll be fine, and maybe you'll find a man up there?" Bella knows that her mother is genuinely concerned about this possibility.

Bella groans, but doesn't offer any better reply than that, and then says, "I gotta go, Mom. I'll email you this week, ok?"

"Alright, lovey, be safe."

One down, two more to go. She'll have to call Angela, and her boss, and then she'll be home free. She's not too worried about her boss; she pretty much hated her job anyway, but Angela… Angela's her best friend, and…

Voicemail.

"Hey Ang. It's Bella. Look, I know this really sucks of me, and I'm a terrible friend for it, but… look. It was an emergency, and. I love you, but. I moved… like, this week, up north. My dad needed me, and I got a…. job... and…" _beep_.

"Goddamn mother fuck!" Bella shouts. Tossing her phone across the room. "Shit." Hands tangling up in her hair, she shuts her eyes and grimaces.

Edward wakes up with a start and eyes Bella closely, not sure what he did, something Bella has to tell him isn't his fault.

"Edward, don't worry, go back to sleep. Everything's alright."

"Are you upset, Bella?" he asks softly. "I didn't mean to make you upset. Please don't leave."

"I'm not leaving, Edward. Remember? I'm here until you tell me to go."

Edward laughs easily. "Never."

Shaking her head to seemingly rid her mind of the thoughts her heart starts hammering at her, Bella laughs, softly, and pats Edward's head as he lies back down.

"I smell," he says after a minute of silence. His voice is so straightforward and honest, Bella internally freaks out.

"You don't," she lies. Well, not really _lies_, but… Ok, he's not as …. fresh? as he could be, alright? But it isn't disgusting or anything; it's just like… antiseptic, and hospital like.

"I want to take a bath," he says, voice the same, like he hadn't heard her at all. "Can I take a bath, Bella?"

"If you want to, I can have Carlisle sit in with you?" she tries, closing her eyes and praying that he'll agree. He shakes his head 'no.'

_Of course,_ Bella thinks. She nods, and moves for him to sit up. "Alright, come with me, we'll go wrap your arms up," she says, pulling at him so that she can hobble off the bed. He doesn't let her go too far, instead, just picks her up and carries her into the kitchen, all the way down the stairs and everything, and sets her up on the counter, walking first to the freezer to pull out an ice pack, and then to the cabinet to grab the plastic wrap.

"This ok, Bella?" he asks, looking at her as he sets the ice pack on her knee. "This what you wanted?"

"Yes, Edward," she smiles softly at him, looking up to meet his eyes. After the pack is set on her leg, Edward puts his hands on either side of her legs on the counter and moves his body between them, looking up at her, waiting for whatever she says. She knows then, that he'd commit murder if she asked him to, not that she's going to.

She drops her eyes, breaking the gaze she had, and blushes, sighing as she rests her head on Edward's shoulder. Instinctively, his hands curl around her back, and her calves link around the backs of his legs.

It's so intimate, and so… those boundaries she wanted her heart to have…. Well, they failed.

"Edward," she whispers, her breath hitting the side of his neck, as she picks at her thumb nail with her hands on her lap. "I shouldn't…"

"_Let me be the one to hold you down when all your world crashes at your feet_," he whispers. "_Let me hold you now, let me hear that heart beat._"

She closes her eyes and takes a slow breath in. "Apocalyptic Love?" That song was an unreleased demo from their sophomore album, the song she loved to listen to acoustically, over and over, as Edward and Jasper sang in perfect harmonies.

Before he could respond, or Bella could do something stupid, Carlisle walked in, "Oh, I'm sorry, I'll come back?"

"No, no, Carlisle, it's fine," Bella says, calling him back. "I'll need your help wrapping his arms up for a _bath_," she says, looking right at him. Bringing up the bath, she hopes to change the subject away from what he just interrupted. She can see the look in his eyes, but she's not really ready to talk about it.

"I'm assuming he said he wanted you there?" he asks, looking at her and then Edward. Edward scoffs and looks down at Bella, still locked in by her calves, his arms still around her back.

"Edward, will you let your father help you wrap the bandages up?" Bella asks, looking up at him. "I can't say I'm that good with plastic wrapping, and he's a doctor…"

"If you want me to," Edward whispers, looking down at her, trailing his fingers over her back as he brings his hands to her lap.

"It's for the best, Edward," she shrugs, moving back on the counter. "Carlisle, I think you should look at his stitches. I always forget that he carries me, and… Well-"

"That can't be good for the stitches?" Carlisle finishes, asking the question.

"Exactly. I can't even begin to imagine how guilty I'd feel if I made his wrists worse. I could be causing permanent damage here," she says, sniffling softly.

"Bella," Carlisle says, moving closer, hands up so Edward doesn't get scared. "There could be damage either way, we don't know yet until the wounds heal, but for now, I think we're in the clear." Then he turns to Edward, "Can I take off the bandages and inspect the stitches, Edward?"

When Edward looks at Bella, he shakes his head, and rests it on her shoulder. "Is this what you want, Bella?" He asks her softly, just like before, like Carlisle isn't with them in the room.

"Yes," she murmurs, "I want you to be ok, Edward, and he can help you. Please, let him look?"

Without moving his head off of her shoulder, his lips soft against the heated skin of her neck, he holds out his arm for Carlisle. Bella tries not to blush.

"Edward, this could hurt, ok?" Carlisle says carefully. "It could hurt, when I pull the bandages off the stitching, are you ready?"

When Edward nods into Bella's throat, she smiles weakly up at Carlisle and bites her lip, hands wrapping around Edward's torso, rubbing down the vertebrae of his spine. "He's ready, Carlisle."

The first few stitches don't hurt much, just the faint pulling of the cloth against his skin, not too much. The further down, the more Carlisle pulled away; Bella smelt, before she saw, the blood. "This part _is_ going to hurt," he whispers, and then he starts pulling, and Bella can _hear_ the pulling of the cloth against his skin. The blood has dried into the gauze and bandaging, and dried to the skin and stitches.

Edward whimpers at first, and then gets quiet. Carlisle looks at Bella and mouths _like a band aid_? And she nods, looking up at him, then wrapping her arms around Edward a little tighter, and when Carlisle's sure he's not going to mess up the stitches, he pulls, hard and fast.

The next few things that happen are instantaneous. Edward involuntarily bites at Bella's neck, Bella screams, and Carlisle puts the icepack over Edward's skin, calming the burning sensation.

With a gasp, Carlisle and Edward both move back, leaving Bella on the counter, now holding onto her neck, tears welling up in her eyes.

"Bella?" Carlisle asks hesitantly. "Are you alright?"

"It was an accident," Edward whimpers, ashamed. "I didn't mean it, Bella, I'm so sorry, please don't leave me."

"Edward," she whispers. "Shhh, come here, come back."

He doesn't move for a second, but when Bella wipes at her eyes and smiles weakly at him, he moves, back to where he was, wrapping his arms around her and hugging her close. "I'm so sorry, Bella. I didn't mean it. It hurt, I. I couldn't control it."

"I know," she tells him, wrapping her arms around him. "It was just an accident, I'm not upset, I swear it ok?" Bella is fairly sure that if she was bitten under any other circumstances, she wouldn't be so understanding, in fact, she'd probably have liked it.

"I swear I didn't mean it, Bella."

After a second, Carlisle, who's stayed quiet since the final bandage was pulled away, says, "What happened?"

"Edward bit my neck," Bella grins. "My own little vampire," she laughs, at first just a little, then hysterically in seconds, physically shaking in Edward's arms. "When you pulled off the bandage, he bit me."

"I should take a look," he says. "Bella?"

"I'm alright, Carlisle," she tells him, grinning. "Really, you should take a look at Edward's wrists, and wrap them up for a bath."

"If you're sure," he says cautiously. "I can look at it later?"

"I'm fine, I promise. After the bath, you can look then, alright?"

Bella tries to think of ways to get out of giving Edward a bath, but doesn't have long to dwell on it, as Carlisle inspects the stitches, pulls out some antibacterial wipes, cleans the dried blood off, and then wraps it with clean bandages and plastic wrap.

The next arm is about the same, minus the biting, and goes a lot swifter.

"As long as he's careful," Carlisle begins. "I think the stitches will come out by the end of the month. He can't carry you any more though, he's already straining the wounds enough," he says, looking at Edward. "No more carrying her, Edward."

Edward scoffs and wraps his arms around Bella protectively, defying Carlisle easily. Bella giggles and cards her hand through his hair, "Enough Edward. Doctor's orders."

"You're hurt," he whispers to her. "I won't let you walk; I don't want you to go away."

"Is that why you won't let me walk?" she asks. "Because you think I'll leave you?"

"You can't leave me," he pleads. "Please, Bella. Don't go."

"I won't go," she tells him. "Remember? Not until you tell me to, whether I can walk or not." He relaxes a little, minutely, and Bella looks over at Carlisle. "So, wanna check out my wounds?" She's really, truly, honestly, not upset, but she would like Carlisle to look anyway.

He laughs lightly at her, and waits for Edward to move – jumping up onto the counter next to her, his fingers lace with hers – and he tilts Bella's neck to the side so that she can find out exactly how hard his son bit the person who's saving him. Bella giggles as Carlisle's fingers trace over the wound, thankfully the skin isn't broken, but already, Carlisle can see the swelling of the bruise, along with the deep discoloration that is accompanying it.

"Final verdict, Doctor Cullen?"

"You'll survive, Isabella, but," he smiles. "You'd do well to keep his teeth away from you, at least until he learns to control himself." He sends a wink Edward's way, to which, Edward blushes, but smiles, ducking down into Bella's neck again, this time, growling lightly into her skin.

Bella flushes, uncontrollably so, and tries not to make a fool of herself. "Bath time, Edward," she says, sliding off the counter, carefully, waiting for Edward to join her. "Ready?"

"Are _you_?" Carlisle asks.

"Not even close," she whispers, limping as best she can with the cast, following Edward up the stairs.

"Just holler if you need help," he calls after them, as they disappear.

Bella takes a deep breath and follows Edward into the bathroom. After turning the knobs for the water, she feels the temperature and tells Edward to wait until the tub fills before he starts to get in it. "Edward," she says, looking at him. "Try not to submerge your arms at all, once inside, and be careful not to over use them, ok?"

"Alright, Bella," he nods earnestly.

"I'm going to step out, just for a minute, don't get in until I get back, alright?" She knows now, that Edward won't do anything stupid, but knows better than to leave him alone too, just in case he slips, or falls, or hits his wrist, or. Or. Or. Or.

"Alright, Bella," he says again, grinning. "What do I get for being a good boy?"

She laughs at that, that innocence, and shakes her head. "We'll get pizza for dinner, Edward Cullen, that's what we'll get." Then she walks out of the room and walks down the hall to where she can hear both Jasper and Emmett practically their respective instruments.

She knocks carefully, and tries not to blush before she's said anything, and is proud of herself when Jasper opens the door and she doesn't gush.

"Hey, Bella, come in, come in. Em and I are working on a new song," he smiles. "Everything alright?"

"Yeah, yeah, fine," she nods, still in a bit star struck, which amuses her slightly, really, because she has been sleeping in the same bed as Edward Cullen for a few days now, and lives in his parents' home. She shouldn't be star struck. "Just that uh, we're."

"What happened to your neck?" Emmett asks, standing up from his kit and walking over to her, tilting her head to the side. "Are you hurt?"

Then she blushes, deep and uncontrollable, ducking her head quickly, lifting her hand to block the bruise.

"Oh shit," Jasper laughs. "Already?"

"What? No! No," she shakes her head. "Carlisle was cleaning his bandages," she tries, but already, Jasper and Emmett are rolling with laughter. "Seriously, you are so immature! Both of you!"

"Cleaning bandages, that's a new one," Emmett winks. "What other witty euphemisms do you have tucked in that pretty head of yours, Swan?"

"He's getting ready to take a bath, _Jesus_. I need your help," as soon as she said the word 'bath' both Emmett and Jasper sobered and looked at her. "I don't know how to do this, and sure, maybe I _am_ attracted to Edward, he's gorgeous, who wouldn't be? Now, will you both help me?"

Jasper nods, understanding her better now. "And he won't let one of us help him, it has to be you?"

"Yes," she whispers. "He barely let Carlisle fix his stitches today. He's been tearing them when he carries me, I already feel bad enough, and it hurt him to have the bandages pulled off. All the blood had dried, and the bandages were stuck to his skin. Edward wasn't ready, and he bit me, that's all, I swear."

"You don't have to justify anything," Emmett smiles. "Don't worry, we tease you if we like you, don't take it the wrong way."

Bella smiles, _finally_, she's making some sort of headway with Emmett.

"Back to the task at hand," Jasper says, suddenly authoritative. "You're in a bit of a predicament, aren't you, Bella?"

"I don't know if I can do this," she confesses softly. "He's going to be _naked_ in that bath water, and we can't use bubbles until his wrists are healed. I'm going to have to _help him bathe_."

"That you will, little girl," Jasper smiles weakly, amused but sympathetic. "You can do this, Bella. You carried him up a flight of stairs, and protected him against the rabid fans, you can _bathe_ him."

This is exactly what Bella needs. A sort pep talk, from his friends, her friends now too, gets her into the right mindset before she gets back into that bathroom.

"BELLA!" Edward bellows, bringing Bella back to the present. "THE WATER!"

"Shit," she groans. "I can do this; I am not a perv for doing this. I am taking care of him."

"You can do this," Jasper and Emmett grin. Then Emmett continues. "You _are_ a perv for doing this, but you're taking care of him, and we love you for it."

Bella laughs and runs (as fast as her brace can take her) back to the bathroom, turning off the faucet with just enough room above the lip of the tub to keep it from flooding. She smiles back at Edward, winking at him as she sees him sitting on the counter, waiting for her, just like she'd asked him to.

"Ready?" she asks. It's times like this where she realizes she's with '_Childlike_ _Edward'_. Not 'Rock Star Edward', or 'IT Boy Edward Cullen', or even 'Twenty-Something Edward', no. She's with Edward Cullen, S-C patient, not the man who sang to her on the counter top half an hour ago, not this time.

He lifts his arms up high above his head, grinning and nodding at her. "Help me, Bella?"

She takes a deep breath, bites her lip, and walks to him, their positions from earlier suddenly opposite. Now, she's between his legs, and he's on the counter, not the other way around. She brings her hands down to the hem of his shirt and tugs it up softly, pulling it above his shoulders, and then over his head.

She's blushing again, and for the life of her, can't make eye contact, even if she tried (which she hasn't – _won't_). Once the shirt is off, Edward smiles down at her and helps Bella fold it, putting it on the counter top, waiting.

Scooting off the counter, Edward stands with his hands to his sides, waiting for Bella to keep helping him. She shudders. "Edward, I. You can take your own pants off," she tells him. "I can't do that for you," she whispers, eyes still downcast, pointedly looking away.

"Ok, Bella," Edward says, nodding, unbuttoning his jeans and pulling them off, folding them as well, putting them right on top of his discarded shirt. "This ok, Bella?" he asks her, just like last time, last time when he got way to close to her, where she almost kissed him.

She pulls back, slightly, and nods, plastering a smile to her face as she takes in his body. He's just got boxers on now, and she's tempted to tell him to keep them on, for this bath, just so she can get used to this.

"Hey," she whispers. "Wait right here, Edward, ok?"

She hobbles out of the room and back to Jasper and Emmett. "Can I tell him to keep his boxers on?" she asks, hurriedly. "Please?"

"You'll have to deal with him sooner or later," Emmett shrugs. "I wouldn't worry about him, Bells; we don't really think you're that pervy. Just get the boxers off, let him be an exhibitionist for a while, and be alright with it."

"Fuck," she groans. "I'll do it then," she nods, mostly to herself, and then hobbles back to the bathroom, where Edward's waiting in just his boxers.

"Are you ok, Bella?" he asks. "Did I do something wrong?"

"No, Edward, you didn't," she smiles at him. "Ready for your bath?"

"Yep!" he smiles, grinning wide. "Do I have to keep these on?" he asks, thumbing the elastic band on his boxers. "They'll get wet if I do."

One final breath, and then she takes her eyes off the floor, and looks into his eyes. "You can take them off, if you're comfortable."

"I'm very comfortable with you, Bella," he smiles, so sweetly, so innocently, Bella really starts to feel perverted. "Are you comfortable with me, Bella?" he asks, pushing his boxers down. He tilts his head to the side in question, and Bella almost, literally almost, attacks him right then.

"For the most part," she answers honestly. "I just want you to get better, Edward. Now, tub, we'll clean you up?"

He nods, sidestepping her to get into the tub, sinking down into it slowly. He exhales as he gets used to the temperature of the water, and shivers, bringing his head to rest on his knees. "Ready, Bella."

With her eyes glaring at a spot on the wall, Bella moves to kneel down in front of the tub, arms resting idly on the lip, debating whether she should proceed or not. She's never given anyone a bath before, not even a little child. She never bathed with her ex boyfriends, so she's kind of… in the dark? She decides to take Edward's lead, start on his back. He pulls himself up, head resting on his knees as he waits for Bella to lather up the sponge.

"What's your favorite color, Edward?" Bella asks, voice surprisingly calm amidst the storm of her heart.

"Blue," he grins, shivering as she brings the soapy sponge up his spine, following the trail she's accustom to following with her fingertips. "What's your favorite color, Bella? It can be blue too, if you want."

"Mine is green," she tells him, trailing the sponge over his shoulders, down the length of his arms. "Green like gem stones, and like the moss here in Forks, dark green, like life."

"That feels nice," Edward sighs, closing his eyes as Bella swallows hard and continues her descent down his body. She runs the sponge over his torso, down to his hips, and then blinks a few times, skipping down to his feet and ankles.

She'll cross that bridge when she has too… with her eyes closed, rubber gloves, and an oxygen mask. (Without all of those physical barriers, her emotional ones are sure to crumble).

"Can I ask you a question, Bella?" Edward asks softly, lifting one leg so she can rinse off his calves. She nods of course, and he smiles. "What did you do before you found me?"

"Well, besides being an avid fan," she smiles, lifting his other leg. "I used to work as an editor for the newspaper in Phoenix. "

"Are you gonna miss it?" he asks her, looking up at her with wide eyes as she trails the sponge up his knee.

"Nope, not a bit. I hated my job, and I got my degree in English, I was wasting my education at that place. Here, while I'm with you, maybe I can start writing again."

"I'd like that," Edward nods. "I write, sometimes. Or, well. I used to. I haven't written since we put out the last CD," he shrugs. "I just haven't felt it, you know?"

He's not Childlike Edward anymore, no. Now he's Edward Cullen, lead singer and guitar player for _Twilight_. This knowledge is harder to swallow for Bella, because now he's a man. Well, he was a man before, always, but right now…

She blushes again, and runs the sponge over Edward's thighs again, before shifting her hands back to his spine, running the sponge down his back, and then into the water to rinse him off.

"All clean," she breathes, starring off to the side. "Are your arms too wet?"

"No. I'm not all clean, Bella. You missed a spot," he whispers, voice low. Bella's eyes are on his in an instant, mouth open wide and gaping.

"Edward, I."

"Here, Bella," he points, right above his heart on the far side of his torso. "It's still dry here, you missed it."

Bella exhales loudly, cheeks bright red. Reaching over with the sponge, she runs it over the 'dry spot' and rinses it off, but when she goes to pull away, Edward brings his hand up to her neck, his fingers running over the bruise his teeth left their earlier. He runs the pads of his fingers over it lightly, and leans in, kissing the mark softly, whispering, "I'm so sorry, Isabella. I didn't mean to hurt you."

Bella takes a shaky breath and pulls back. "I'm not hurt, Edward," she tells him. "I promise I'm ok. It's just a mark." Now she can feel the softness of his lips where she once felt his teeth, and she knows she's blushing red, bright red. "I swear."

"You're my favorite," he smiles. Childlike Edward is back, running his hands through her hair. "So pretty, Bella. Please don't go."

"Not until you tell me to," she tells him again, rinsing him off a final time before standing to hold up a towel. "Now, be careful getting up from the tub, it might be slippery." She looks away automatically when she hears the shifting in the water, and holds the towel open until he walks into it. Helping him wrap the terry cloth around his body, she runs her hands over his arms to dry him, leaning away.

"Ok, Edward. When you're dry, put on some pajamas and we'll go downstairs for pizza, ok?"

"Bella?" Edward asks, stopping her from leaving. He adjusts the towel over his waist, knotting it swiftly and pulls her close. "Thank you for everything," he whispers to her, moving to tilt her chin up. She's about to pull away, her head screaming _this is too close, this is too close!_ But she doesn't get the chance before he kisses her forehead, his cool lips resting on her skin for one second, two seconds, three. He pulls back, smiles at her, runs his fingers over the mark on her neck once more, and turns around, letting Bella go, "You saved me."

When Bella hurries out of the bathroom, Alice, Esme, Carlisle, Jasper, and Emmett are there, waiting, all with large smiles on their faces, grinning annoyingly. Bella groans, blushing again, deeper still, and looks to the floor, still unable to really breathe.

"So, the bath went… well?" Emmett asks, smiling outrageously.

"Boxers off?" Jasper asks, waggling his eyebrows.

"Alright, I get it, you can tease me later. Get out of his bedroom now, before he comes back out here and sees you all. I'm fine, he's clean. I didn't faint, alright? Now shoo."

Carlisle stands first, then Esme and Alice, and then the boys, all of them leaving, except for Carlisle. "How's your leg?" he asks. "I should have thought about the brace before I made you kneel down in the bathroom. Does it hurt?"

"It's just throbbing, I'm sure I'm fine, Carlisle. Honestly."

"When Edward goes to bed tonight, I want to do some more ice and e-stim, ok?" he asks. Looking at her, he says, "It can get worse, if you aren't careful, Isabella. You need to be cautious."

"I understand," she tells him, daring to look him in the eye. "Right now, the only thing I'm concerned about it getting Edward dressed. Period."

Carlisle laughs, salutes her, and walks out of the bedroom, closing the door behind him. He calls back, "Pizza will be here in twenty," and Bella listens for his footsteps, heading down the stairs and away from the bedroom.

"Edward? Are you alright in there?" Bella asks, knocking on the door, flannel pants in her hands. "I have your pajamas here."

"Come in," he says, opening the door. He's got his towel still around his waist (thank god) and he looks kind of lost. "I didn't know if I should put on my dirty boxers again, so I just waited."

"Edward," she laughs. "You could have come in and gotten your own pajamas."

"You said when I was dry. I'm not all the way dry yet," he says simply, shrugging his shoulders.

"Alright, here," she says, handing him his pajama pants. "Get dressed, and when you come out, I'll check out your bandages and everything ok?"

"Alright, Bella," he whispers, taking the pants, closing the door softly. Bella sits up on the bed and pulls at the Velcro on her brace to loosen it, rubbing softly at the bruises there. The whole brace comes off with another pull of the straps, and letting it lay idly on the bed, Bella leans back against the headboard and closes her eyes, trying to ease away the ache and the throbbing. She succeeds, briefly, until she pulls the cast back into place. She's not ready for Edward to see the extent of the bruising, not until she thinks he's ready, which isn't going to be any time soon, not with the way he's been so far. It's barely the first day out of the hospital, Edward being as attached as he is? He definitely doesn't need to see this, not yet.

Edward comes out, just as Bella pulls the brace back up, and smiles at her, hands at his sides to show her that he can get dressed on his own. "See Bella, I can do it all by myself," he grins, pulling at the elastic band of his sleep pants, just enough so Bella can see his boxers underneath. "See Bella? Did I do it ok?"

_You can't dress yourself without getting my approval?_ She thinks to herself, _I am way over my head here._

She doesn't say anything out loud at first, just grins and pushes off the bed, smiling up at him. "You did it right," she nods, patting at his hip. "Ready for some grub?"

He nods vigorously, and smiles, grabbing her hand and lacing their fingers.

"I think I should get more than just pizza for being a good boy, Bella," he says, looking right at her. "I think I deserve a kiss."

Bella blanches, her eyes go wide, and she gasps, shaking her head. "Edward that is not a good idea."

Edward shrugs, "One little kiss?"

She thinks back to what Dr. Crowley told her, the same thing that Carlisle insisted she needn't worry about. "Edward, no. That isn't a good idea," she shakes her head, determined, and shudders, amazed at her own resolve.

Edward leans in anyway, hands brushing her sides, then her arms, pulling her closer to him. "I think it's a good idea, in fact, I think _you_ think it's a good idea too."

Trying to think of some way to spin this around, Bella puts one hand on his chest, gripping at his tee shirt and stares up at him. After a second, his head dips down, leans in closer and then-

"Ouch," she gasps, putting her weight on her braced leg, for just one instant, and then pulls away from Edward, thankful that she thought of some way to stop the kiss.

"Bella, are you alright?" Edward asks, backing up further, giving her space, looking down at her leg.

"Fine, Edward, I'm fine. I just put weight on my leg accidentally, and it hurt for a second, I'm alright now."

He nods, and forgets (hopefully) about the kiss, and then, "Want to check my bandages before we eat?" Bella catches her breath for a second and then responds, making her head nod up and down in response. "When we get down into the kitchen with better light, we'll check into them ok? I'm sure you're fine, but maybe we should have Carlisle look at them, ok?"

Edward agrees, but Bella can tell that he definitely isn't happy about it. Most definitely isn't pleased with the fact that he has to let Carlisle help him again.

Bella tries not to let him affect her like that again, like the last time, and thinks about _anything_ else. She wonders how long it will take for Angela to call her back. She is actually dreading the call in fact. She doesn't really know what she's going to encounter with her, but that sounds like heaven compared to her purgatory here, with her own heart.

Tightening her grasp on his hand, Bella leads the way down the stairs, hobbling on every other step. Half way down, Edward picks her up, despite everything, and carries her the rest of the way down, even though she's pushing at his chest, telling him to put her down, as forcefully as she can muster.

"Bella, it hurts you," he says easily. "I won't get hurt."

At the landing, he puts Bella down and winks at her. "No worse for wear, I promise," and then leans down to kiss her forehead. "Let's have my father look at the wrap job, shall we?"

_America's It Boy is back_, she thinks, pushing her way in front of him. "Don't do it again," she tells him, index finger pointing at his chest. "I mean it, Cullen."

He tries (and fails) to hide a smirk, and then winks again, picking her up at the waist, bringing her nose to nose with him. "Say it again," he tells her, his breath hot on her cheek. "Do you still mean it?"

"Edward, put me down," she gasps. "You're going to hurt yourself."

"I don't think you mean it," he whispers, nuzzling her cheek with his nose. "I don't think you really want me to put you down."

Bella tries to think of everything she's learned about Edward Cullen over the years of being a fan of his music, and over the last forty-eight hours of being his … Superman? Superwoman? Supergirl? But for the life of her, can't think of anything that will help her out of his arms, not when her heart is telling her this is exactly where she wants to be.

"Edward Cullen, you put me down this instant," she says, loudly and clearly, face determined, even as her heart starts and stops and stutters, hammering loudly in her chest. "Put. Me. Down."

When Edward still doesn't put her down, instead trailing his nose over her cheek, down her jaw bone, toward her neck, she pushes at him with her fist, hard as she can from being in his arms. He stumbles back, back toward the banister, toward the staircase, and Bella can _see_ them falling backwards, him tripping over the stairs and down, hurting himself. She cries out, like she's going to brace herself for the fall, but he catches them before they go down, and then – finally, puts her down.

"What were you _thinking_?" she asks him, eyes narrowed and fierce. "You could have gotten hurt, Edward, is that what you're trying to do? Finish what you started, and this time, try to take me with you?" She knows, even as her body and mind go against everything she's feeling, that she's over reacting. That they were on the landing. That they couldn't have gotten hurt, even if he had lost his balance. For the life of her, she can't stop the flooding of emotions, can't stop the way she pushes at his chest and grips his shirt, holding onto him tightly, as she sobs, tears falling down her cheeks, unstoppable and unchecked.

"What's going on?" Esme asks, eyes on the two of them. She's not the only one there, in the archway between the foyer and the kitchen, Alice, Carlisle, Jasper, Emmett, and Rosalie are there too, all of the staring at Edward and Bella with questioning eyes.

"Did he hurt you, Bella?" This time, its Carlisle's voice, strong and concerned, even as Bella shakes her head back and forth, burying her head further into Edward's chest, embarrassed.

"What happened?" Alice asks, inching forward minutely, just enough so Bella can see her try.

Edward wraps his arms around Bella, holding her close, whispering just for her. "I'm so sorry, Bella, please. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you. I would never hurt you," he says softly, rubbing her back.

"I think we deserve to know what's going on here," Rosalie says, hands on her hips. "Why is she crying, Edward?"

"Rosalie!"

"What?" Rosalie asks. "Look, he got hurt, I realize that, but we all know he's still Edward," she shrugs. "He's still Edward, regardless of this condition, so I should be able to ask him direct questions without going through _her_."

Edward's arms wrap tighter around Bella's back, holding her closely. "Bella, please, look at me, I'm sorry."

She shakes her head, afraid to look up at him, not when she's breaking down. She's overwhelmed, completely in over her head, and for the first time since she's been in his life, she lets the weight of her decision to the forefront of her mind. It's a hefty responsibility, something she's not trained for, something she could screw up at any moment.

"I never meant to hurt you," Edward whispers.

"What is going on?" Rosalie asks again. "Really, this is ridiculous."

Finally, Bella turns, pulling herself away from Edward, patting his arm so he knows she's alright, that she's not really upset. Not with him anyway, more like herself.

"I tripped, and he caught me, even though he's got the bandages, and I got upset," _not completely a lie, definitely not the truth_, she thinks, shrugging her shoulders. "I over reacted, I'm sorry."

Rosalie groans, rolls her eyes, and walks back into the kitchen. Alice eyes her knowingly, but allows herself to be pulled away by Jasper's insistent hands. Emmett goes next, followed soon after by Esme. Carlisle catches her gaze and nods, understandingly, and then turns, leaving just the two of them again.

"Bella, I'm sorry, I was only teasing. I didn't know, I swear. I wouldn't have fallen, I'm good on my feet," Edward whispers, crouching down to catch her eyes. "Look at me," he pleads. "Please tell me you won't leave me."

"I won't leave you," she tells him. "I just, the stairs, Edward. I," she sighs, trying not to cry again. "I carried you up an entire flight, and the whole time, I could have lost my footing, I could have fallen and we could have-" she doesn't finish, just looks down at her hands. "You can't pick me up anymore, Edward. You could do serious damage to your hands if you're not careful."

"I just didn't want you to hurt," he murmurs. "I watch your face, Bella. I watch it and it hurts you to step with your leg. You're _hurting_, and it hurts me."

"I have to let my leg heal, Edward. It hurts me, yes, but I have to heal on my own."

"I don't want you to hurt," he shakes his head. "It makes me so sad, Bella. I don't like seeing you hurt."

Taking a breath, Bella takes Edward's hand and pulls him over to the couch, sitting him down next to her. She pulls her leg up, resting the heel of her foot on the table and pulls at the Velcro tabs on her brace, undoing them one by one. With each strap, the pressure on her swollen knee lessens, the throbbing echoing in her ears briefly before it disappears completely.

"I want you to see," she tells him. "When you see, I think it will help you to understand that it will heal." This could go terribly wrong, she knows that, but she can't _not_ show him now, after everything that just happened. "Everyday my bruises will heal. At first, they're going to look terrible, it's going to look worse before it looks better, but it _will_ get better. It's going to hurt," she nods. "I know it's going to hurt for a while, but no matter what, you cannot pick me up anymore, ok?"

Edward exhales a shaky breath, eyes focused on the Velcro strap between her fingers. He nods, and when he does, Bella pulls the last strap off, and lets the brace fall to the floor, landing with a soft sound on the carpeting. Edward gasps, closing his eyes and pushing his face into Bella's shoulder at the first sign of the yellow and purple and red and blue around her kneecap.

Bella would do the same if she could, but he needs to see this, he needs to realize that there are things that he can't fix. "Edward," she whispers, rubbing his cheek. "I need you to see this, for me, ok?"

Reluctantly, he moves his face from the crook of her shoulder and looks down at her knee again, staring at it, blinking his wide eyes, his bottom lip trembling.

She goes one-step further, pulling their entwined hands over, down her thigh to her knee, letting his fingertips graze the surface of the wounds, fleeting touches, soft, like his lips on her neck. "It doesn't hurt like this," she tells him. "When the brace is off, it doesn't throb and it doesn't push on the bruises, but I have to wear it so that I don't put pressure on it, and tear anything."

"I'm so sorry," Edward whispers, scooting off the side of the couch, resting his head on her thigh, right above the bruises. He trails his fingers over the colors slowly, softly, and moves his lips slowly over the darkest bruise, on the right side of her leg. She gasps at the warmth of his lips, again, and her leg jerks, involuntarily.

"Did I hurt you?" Edward asks, pulling back instantly. "Please, tell me I didn't hurt you again, I couldn't live with myself if I did. You're going to leave again, aren't you?"

"I'm not leaving," she shakes her head. "You didn't hurt me." She feels like she's said it so many times in the short time he's been awake, she wonders if getting a t-shirt would be too dry for his sense of humor.

She reaches for his face, cups his cheek, and pulls him back up, slowly. "Edward, I swear to you, with everything I have, and everything I am, I will not leave you, not until you tell me to, and even then, I'll put up a fight, alright?"

She grins wide and winks at him, and he giggles. The tension is over, for now, and it's enough for them, just to know that Bella is staying.

She puts the brace back on her leg, grimacing as she tightens the Velcro straps again, and with Edward's help, she gets up, and they walk to the kitchen, to eat pizza, with Edward's family.

"So Bella, everything is set up in your room," Alice grins. "The movers will be here first thing in the morning, so you'll have to wait to get everything, but the bedding is fresh on your bed, and I put the stuff in your overnight bags into the dresser. There's a television, and a desk as well." She pointedly doesn't mention what happened in the hallway, but Bella can see the silent _I'm here for you_ in her eyes.

"Anything else you need, we can order," Esme grins. "And we'll have to do some heavy decorating this week, but for now, at least it's a spot you can find solace. You'll have to tell me everything you like, so I can shop for bedding and drapery and art work and stuff. What's your favorite color, Bella, I'll start with a palette."

"It's green," Edward says, looking up at Esme. Bella beams. "Green like gem stones, and like the moss here in Forks, dark green, like life," he grins, looking at Bella with a silly look on his face.

"Thank you, Edward," Esme smiles, looking at him with sincere eyes, full of pride and overwhelming joy. Bella knows that look; she has that feeling in her heart every time Edward does something sweet for her. "Green is a great color."

Edward nods, and goes back to his pizza. Bella looks up at Carlisle and catches the _this is definitely progress_ look in his eyes before he too, looks away and starts in on his pizza.

-------------------------------------

a/n: this project is kind of my baby. The term "Superman Complex" is completely my own fabricated diagnosis. I have no medical background, although, I'm asking a psych major if things do make sense. Many, many thanks to **­­**_**the­-glory-days**_, as always, for kicking me in the ass every time I stop writing. Updates will be few and far between, but because they're so much longer than my other chapter updates, I hope that's alright with you guys.

Also, while you're waiting for the next installment, why don't you take a stroll to _the-glory-days_' page. She's currently writing a few amazing stories; Alphabet Weekends, updated twice a week, and In Another Life (&& In This Life) which are _stellar!_

**Reviews are appreciated. I'd love to hear your feedback :]**


	4. Chapter 4

Edward Cullen is a rock star in the biggest band of the decade. He's America's "It Boy," but he's still unhappy. Will Bella be in time to save him? AH AU

**Disclaimer:** Stephanie Meyer is the genius who created _Twilight_; I'm just toying around with her characters.

_Superman Complex_

Chapter 4

The night goes by smoother than expected. Bella still hasn't heard from Angela, but she supposes she will tomorrow, before Angela heads out for work. Edward, terrified to upset Bella in anyway, listens to her every word, finishing his pizza, staying downstairs with the family, asking her what she'd like to do, holding her hand, anything and everything.

When Edward's family decide to head up to bed, Edward puts out his hand to help Bella. "I won't carry you, but I was thinking maybe you could let me give you a piggy back ride? That way, I'm not straining my arms, and you're not stressing your leg. I don't want you to hurt."

"I appreciate your concern, but I can walk up those stairs just fine. Remember what we talked about? I need to heal in my own way, Edward." She looks up at him to take his hand. "Come on, let's get you settled for bed."

Before getting to the stairs, Carlisle stops Bella and asks if she can visit him in his study once Edward's asleep. She nods, agreeing, and smiles at Carlisle to hide the fear in her eyes. She's terrified now, that Carlisle will decide that she's not the right person to care for Edward anymore, that they need a professional.

When Edward squeezes his hand against her own, Bella is pulled away from her thoughts again and brought back to the present situation, back to Edward.

Unsure, like during bath time, as to how to proceed, Bella contemplates a reward system for Edward, every time he does something right, and on his own. That will take some thinking, some planning, and she'd have to talk to Carlisle before implicating it, but it sounds about right.

"Edward," she begins. "I have to tell you now, that I have my own room here, and I will probably want privacy at some point, and I'm going to ask you to respect that." His face darkens, but Bella continues before he can refute the idea. "I have to talk to Carlisle, but I have a bit of a proposition for you."

He nods, more curious than skeptical.

"The first few nights, I know it will be hard for you to sleep, let alone sleep alone, so I won't ask you to do it alone for now. I know you're trying your hardest, right?"

He nods, enthusiastically.

"After a few nights, maybe a week, we'll talk about sleeping in separate beds, with our bathroom doors open, so that if anything should occur in the middle of the night, we're a lavatory away, ok?"

He whimpers and shakes his head 'no'.

Taking a deep breath, Bella hopes she isn't going to ruin everything when she says, "Every night you sleep alone, I'll give you something."

His eyes open wide, and then, "What kind of something?"

"What kind of something do you want, Edward?" she asks. "I have chocolate, or we could do something fun the next day, or I could write for you," she giggles then, when she looks up into his eyes.

"What if I want a kiss?" He asks, and then, just like earlier on the staircase, Bella can see him, see Edward, _America's It Boy_, back in his sparkling, emerald green eyes.

"I don't think that's a good idea, Edward. We've talked about this," Bella says softly, looking down, and then up to meet his gaze; she's not going to bend on this.

"I think we talked about you _saying_ you thought it was a bad idea, but _thought_ it was a good one," he counters, grinning devilishly, taking a step forward toward her.

She automatically takes a step back. "What kind of kiss, Edward?" She kind of curses herself for not stopping that sentence before it fell out of her mouth. "I don't think it's a good idea, but a kiss on the forehead, or a kiss on the cheek, that would be alright."

"That's not the kind I want," he tells her, taking another step forward, this time reaching out to hold her at the waist.

"I don't think," she pauses, contemplating the reactions she'll get from this next part, but says it anyway. "I don't think, with your condition, that it would be wise for me to go to that level with you, Edward."

He is the one to take a step back this time, he looks hurt, for the briefest of seconds, and then his eyes glint mysteriously, and he smirks again. "You're exactly the type of girl I would have gone for before my condition, Bella, and I think you want to kiss me just as much as I want to kiss you. I can read people," he says, nodding. "And I know you want to kiss me."

She almost says _it doesn't matter what I want_, but shakes her head, and says instead, "No, Edward. I won't bend on this. Kissing is out of the question."

"All kinds of kisses, Bella?"

She exhales, crossing her arms over her chest, hips jutted in annoyance. "What kind of kiss do you have in mind then, Edward?"

"I want this kind," he says, voice low and raspy, swooping in to catch her at the small of her back, pulling her forward into him. Before she can protest, his lips are on hers, kissing her softly, his lips sweet and warm on her own.

When he pulls away, he blinks, staring down at her expectantly, waiting for her reaction.

"Edward Cullen," she shakes her head, blushing deep red. "You can't just kiss me like that!"

He grins at her, pulls her forward again, this time to kiss her forehead.

"I think I'll try sleeping alone starting _tonight_, if that is my reward."

Bella groans, letting Edward pull her across the room, to his bed. "I don't think I'm ready for that," he confesses. "I don't think I can do it. I want to, for you Bella. I want to be better for you." His voice is soft, broken. "I want to be good."

And just like that, Edward Cullen, _America's It Boy_, is gone again, like the wind.

"Hey," she whispers, pulling his chin up to look at his eyes. They're darker, clouded, and she can't help but tip toe up and kiss him soft, quick, on the cheek. "You're doing wonderfully, Edward. You're doing amazing, ok? You're already blowing the theories out of the water. Every day, from here on out, it's just progress, alright?"

He looks at her, unsure, but nods, after a second, and pulls her into a hug. "You're ok." After a minute, Bella leans back and pulls down the comforter. "Lay down, Edward. I'll sit with you for a minute, but then I have to talk to Carlisle. I'll come back afterward, and sleep in here. Is that alright?"

"What if I wake up?" he asks. "Don't leave me, Bella."

"If you wake up, you'll know I'm right down the hall, Edward. I'll be in Carlisle's study, for just a moment, and then from there, I'll go into my room, grab some better sleep clothes, maybe take a shower, and then I'll be right back here, with you. You can do this."

He nods, grimacing, holding back a yawn. "I don't want you to go," he whispers, laying his head in her lap. "You won't leave me, right?"

"Not until you tell me to, Edward Cullen."

He whispers something, soft and fleeting across her legs, but she doesn't catch it, and as she listens to his breathing even out, she doesn't have the heart to wake him.

When she's sure he's asleep, she pulls herself out from underneath his head and moves him up to the pillows, covering him with a blanket and smoothing the hair off his forehead before she heads out of the room, leaving the door cracked open.

When she heads down the hallway, her nerves wrack her, shaking her to her core and she thinks about the possibility of Carlisle telling her to go home, that they didn't realize the severity of the situation, that they need a professional. She thinks about what she'd tell him, maybe something like, "I made a promise to Edward, I'm not leaving until he's ready for me to go, no matter what you think." She shrugs it all away as she knocks on the study door.

_Knock, knock, knock._

"Come in, Bella," Carlisle says, greeting her with a smile as she comes into the study, closing the door behind her. He points to a comfy looking wingback, and asks her to take a seat, as he does the same behind a desk.

"So," he starts, still smiling. "I told Tyler that I would keep a daily log of Edward's progress, and notify him of the progress, if that's alright with you?" When she nods, he continues. "I thought you'd be alright with it. So now, we'll just start a nightly meeting, where we go over the events of the day. Does that sound alright with you? I think you're doing a great job, by the way, we all do."

She smiles, "Thank you, Carlisle, sometimes I don't know if I'm doing the right thing, and sometimes, I feel like, like I'm competing to do the right thing within me, so, I'm glad you think I'm doing well."

"I truly do," he nods. "I've done quite a bit of research, and have contacted quite a few of my colleagues about this condition since being home, and from what I've learned, you've helped Edward through what they referred to as the _Exploratory Affection Stage_. This stage, as far as I know, is just a very basic understanding of the condition and the world as it pertains to him in this stage. Do you understand?"

When he looks up at her, from his notes, she's got this confused look on her face, which she tries to hide, but Carlisle just laughs. "No? Ok, let me see. Well, in most cases of this condition, the D-I-D, or Edward, is unaware of the fact that he is not the same, and in almost all documented cases, the savior figure, you, carries this emotion, similar to survivor's guilt, do you follow?"

She nods.

"So, like survivor's guilt, the savior allows the D-I-D to get away with things people would not allow to slide in any other case. You're firm guidance in this first day alone, sets the pace for Edward's future, and as I explained to one of my associates, you are helping him heal at a much faster rate than we were expecting."

"Is that why he disobeys me? Didn't Dr. Crowley explain that he wouldn't go against anything I said?"

"Well, if I'm being honest, I think that Edward would have been defiant regardless," Carlisle shrugs. "He's always been headstrong, and even that first night in the hospital, the nurses said he wouldn't leave your side, and that was before you were even conscious. I think what happened before the hospital has a major part to play in that as well."

Bella shudders involuntarily, remembering the amount of blood, and the helpless feeling she felt before she took the situation into her own hands. "What do you mean?"

"Well, I wasn't down there, so I can't say for sure, but I think that whatever you said to him, whatever you did, it shaped the mold Edward fell into when he woke up," he explains. "That's why he was so loyal to you, even before you woke up, why he wants to help you, even when you tell him not to. I have to ask, Bella, what did you say to him down there?"

Bella shakes her head, not wanting to think about it, knowing she has to. "I. I don't know, it all happened so fast, and there was so much blood. He. He looked so upset, and then so helpless, and I just knew I couldn't leave him down there, I didn't want to leave him for a second. I just. I just did what I knew I needed to do."

He nods, scribbling down into his notebook. She thinks for a moment, and then, "He kept saying that no one loved him, and being here with you, I knew that isn't true, but he looked so alone, and then he made the cut and told me to leave. I tried to stop him and he slashed at me," she says, holding up her bandaged arm. "Then he took the box cutter to his other wrist and made the next incision. There was so much blood."

His hand flies across the page as he takes down more notes, nodding along with her words, and then he flips back a few pages before he looks back up at Bella.

"Along with the first stage, Edward seems to have completely bypassed another stage in this condition. The Affective Orientation stage, it seems, has been skipped. He remembered all of his family immediately. He also remembered the events leading up to the attempted suicide," Bella cringes, but Carlisle continues unfazed, "and is retaining everything since. In previous cases, Bella, this has been the stage that takes the most amount of time and effort, I have to say, I think you're the cause of this, partly."

"What? Why?"

"Well, do you remember right when he woke up, when Alice had you hurry back from the showers?"

Bella nods, looking at Carlisle curiously.

He continues, "He was very disoriented, confused, and showed signs of severe amnesia. Tyler and I feared the worst, knowing about this stage specifically. But you got back to the room and forced him to apologize to his mother. When you did that, I think, mind you this is just my opinion on it, that you started a domino effect in his brain. What I mean by that is, that when you forced him to recognize Esme, and forced him to communicate with her, it opened a metaphorical flood gate in his memory, bringing everyone and every past event back, up until the attempt."

Eyes wide, Bella says, "Surely that isn't my influence. You can't think he wouldn't have remembered the people who love him the most."

"Most S-C patients don't, sweetheart, not for months."

She gasps. "Carlisle, I don't know what I'm doing here, I'm in over my head, and I feel like I'm not making the right decisions," she confesses. "I don't know if what I'm doing, or what he does is right, or if. I just…"

"It's understandable, Bella. It's only been a day since he was released, and in less than twenty-four hours, he's made more progress than sixty percent of all S-C patients had. That's a remarkable statistic, and I think that's because of you."

"Do you remember, when he was still asleep, I asked you what happens if he falls in love with me?" she asks, afraid to continue.

Carlisle nods, donning a curious expression now, "Yes, I remember."

"He told me, before he fell asleep just now, that I was the type of girl he would have looked for before his condition, and then he uh, he kissed me."

His eyes go wide, but he pulls his lips into a tight line, allowing her to go on.

"I was trying to tell him that I needed my space, and that I needed him to respect that, and was going to initiate a reward system, you know? Like every night he slept alone, after the first week, he and I would do something fun that he liked, or I'd write for him, or something, you know?"

Carlisle nods and waves his hand for her to continue.

"He told me that he didn't want any of that," she stops. "Well, he didn't say he didn't want it per say, but he said he wanted a kiss instead. I told him that I didn't think it was a good idea, and he contradicted me, tried to tell me that I really did want to kiss him, and when I stayed firm to my decision against it, he told me I was the type of girl he would have looked for. That's when he kissed me."

"Interesting," Carlisle says, jotting something down. "This puts you in a very awkward position, doesn't it, Bella?"

"Um, yeah, a little," she shrugs. "I mean, I hate to say it, but your son is very good looking, and he's very sweet, and under normal circumstances I would have _wanted_ to kiss him. Hell, any circumstance other than this, and I probably would have kissed him, but I feel like I'm cornered here."

"Understandable," he tells her. "First, I just want you to know that if the situation were different, Esme and I believe you would have been the perfect match for Edward. You are smart, unbelievably compassionate, understanding, and quick witted."

Smiling, Bella blushes and looks down at her lap.

"But under these conditions, I get where you're coming from. I can't tell you how to handle this situation, especially since the way you've handled everything thus far it has been very well done. I can say that I think you should stay firm with him, and if you're uncomfortable, you let him know that. In this instance, I wouldn't disagree with you treating his like any other unwelcome male advance."

Laughing lightly, Bella nods.

"He has to know that there are boundaries, lines he cannot cross, like what I think you did before dinner, no?"

"Yes," she says, knowing they were going to get to this eventually. "He tried, and succeeded in carrying me down the stairs before dinner, and when I told him to put me down, he didn't, and he, well, he…" she doesn't know how to tell Carlisle that his son touched her in ways he shouldn't have, so instead she says, "he held me very close and kind of nuzzled my jaw, like a lover would?"

Carlisle nods, completely clinical, not the father, now the doctor.

"When I told him to put me down, he told me that I really didn't want him to put me down, that I wanted to stay in his arms, so I pushed him back, and when we almost fell, I cried out."

"Why did you cry out?"

"Because I got a flashback of me carrying him up the stairs in the concert venue. I felt the way I felt when I was there, terrified, and almost helpless, like it was happening all over again."

"Oh, I see, and that's when we all walked in?"

"Yes."

"So what did you do then?"

"After you all walked back into the kitchen, I sat down with him and showed him my bruises, told him that I needed to heal on my own, and while I healed, it was going to hurt, but it needed to hurt before it got better. It's almost like he reads my emotions."

"That he does," Carlisle says. "He's always been very good at reading others. When he was younger, Emmett and Jasper used to joke that he was a mind reader, because he could read people so well."

"Oh goodie," Bella laughs, rolling her eyes. "Carlisle, I don't know if I'm going to be able to differentiate what my heart feels from what my head knows is right much longer. I have to be honest with you, my heart stutters when he holds my hand, that can't help the situation."

Carlisle gives her a sympathetic smile, nodding in understanding. "Like I said, sweetheart, Esme and I couldn't think of anyone better suited for him than you, and maybe that's why you're helping him as much and as quickly as you are. Right now, Edward is in between noted stages. He's not in the Affective Orientation stage, but he's not showing signs of any of the other stages either. We can expect some verbal backlashes, mood swings, depression, and attempts at depenetration."

"Excuse me, what?"

"Depenetration," Carlisle repeats. "This is common in a communication theory called the 'social penetration' model of communication and relationships," he explains. "When the costs exceed the benefits, people tend to withdraw, and it usually leads to the termination of the relationship. It's common in dating, and things of the like, when you think about breaking up. In Edward's case, he will try to withdraw both physically and emotionally from you, and the rest of us.

"My colleagues say that in most cases, when depenetration begins with an S-C patient, they tend to pull away from their savior, both with resistance and emotionally. He won't confide in you, he will openly defy you, but not in the ways he's defying you now, and will try his best to get you to leave him be.

"Either outcome from this isn't very positive. The first is that the patient regresses to a lesser stage, becoming more dependent on the savior again, similar to his initial disorientation at the hospital. The second outcome is a bout of depression."

"Lesser of two evils, hmm?" Bella muses, trying to take it all in. Without meaning to, Bella yawns, and rubs at her eyes.

"I think for tonight, this is enough," Carlisle says, closing his book. "We'll see how everything goes tomorrow, but I have to say that your reward system is a very good idea. He may be a victim of S-C, but he is still a man, and he's still my son. If he does anything to make you uncomfortable, or something to put you in an awkward position, I give you permission to handle it as you see fit." Grinning, he holds up his fist and punches lightly into his other hand.

Bella grins, giggling, and stands up, stretching her back. "Thank you, Carlisle, for taking me into your home and everything. I'm just so worried that I'm going to do something wrong."

"I wouldn't worry about that, Bella dear. He's not so fragile that you have to walk on eggshells. If he does something to upset you, you handle it the way you've been handling it thus far, and I think you'll do fine."

Nodding, she moves to leave, waving once at him before she heads out the door.

"Oh, Bella?"

She stops, turns and looks at Carlisle. "Esme will probably tell you this tomorrow, when you go over decorations, but… you're family to us now, and when Edward is back to normal, you will still be family for us, no matter what happens, ok? Like I said, you're a perfect match for Edward, and on some level, I think he understands that better than any of us, but whatever way this ends, we are here for you, regardless of the decisions made in the future."

Bella smiles appreciatively at Carlisle, "Thank you for that, Carlisle, it means a lot to me."

"You mean a lot to us, little one. Now, go get ready for bed. Edward was always an early riser."

Laughing again, Bella mock salutes and heads back to Edward's room to check in on him, quickly walking through to see him sleeping soundly, and straight into her new room, marveling at the expanse of wall space, wondering if Esme will give her permission to paint it the way she wants.

Turning on the lights, Bella finds a pair of shorts and a tank top and takes one last look at her room before she heads to the bathroom, leaving the door opening up into Edward's room cracked, just so she can hear him if he calls out for her.

This shower is the first full shower she's had since the incident, and with that realization, she decides to forgo the shower and start a bath instead, filling the tub and looking under the cupboard for salts or bubbles. She doesn't have any in this bathroom, but she's sure Alice does, so, looking at the water level to make sure she has time, she walks through her bedroom, out into the hallway and knocks quietly on Jasper and Alice's door.

When Alice answers, she grins wide at Bella and pulls her into their room, hugging her close. "What can I do for you tonight, Bella?" she asks, grinning wide.

"Well, I wanted to take a bath, but there were no-"

"Leave that to me!" Alice giggles, turning fast and heading for the bathroom, practically gliding. "Do you like floral, or more homey smells? I mean, I've got vanilla, or rose, or lavender…"

"How about vanilla?" Bella asks. "I mean, I don't really care, whatever you have is fine."

Jasper laughs. "Vanilla is Edward's favorite smell, Bella Swan, are you trying to seduce him?"

"Oh hush, Jasper, you leave Bella alone. If the girl likes vanilla, then vanilla she will have. Now," Alice says, coming out of the bathroom with a cosmetic bag full of supplies. "Take this, we can go shopping for things you need tomorrow, with Esme. For tonight, just relax and use all of this."

Bella ends up using the bubbles and the salts, pouring in a heaping amount of salts into the steaming water of the tub as she turns off the taps. When she slides into the water, she moans, tilting her head back against the cool lip of the porcelain tub, letting the bubbles surround and cover her as she closes her eyes.

A few minutes pass of blissful silence, and then there's a knock at the bathroom door, Edward walks in, eyes droopy. "Bella, I woke up," he says simply, coming to sit by the bathtub, resting his head on his bandaged arms, on the edge of the tub. "Can I stay in here with you for a little bit, I'm scared."

Bella nods, bringing her hand up out of the water to push the hair off his forehead. "Want to talk about it?" she asks softly.

"I just woke up, and you weren't there. I know you told me you'd be back, but I was so scared that you left, Bella. I just-"

"I told you I wouldn't leave," she says again, running her hand through his hair. "I promise, Edward."

He sighs with content and closes his eyes. It's quiet in the bathroom, Edward looks like he's at peace, and while she's in the tub, Bella feels calm, collected. She's careful to make sure the bubbles are still covering the surface of the water, and after a time, as the water cools, she realizes that Edward is sleeping, even as she continues to play with his hair.

Sitting up, bringing her knees to her chest to keep her covered, she whispers, "Edward," running her hand over his cheek. "Edward, wake up. You've got to be uncomfortable. Go back and lie down, and as soon as I'm dressed, I'll come and lay with you, ok?"

He yawns, and stands, nodding, stretching his arms up over his head. "Okie dokie, Bella." She listens as he pads over the carpet to his bed and then hears the bed springs squeak with his weight. When she's sure he's in bed, she pulls the stopper off the drain and dries herself with a towel, slipping into her sleep shorts and tank top.

She brushes through her hair, braids it off to the side to keep it contained through the night, and brushes her teeth. When she's done, she walks back into Edward's room, puts her brace on the chair next to the bed, and does as she said she would; she lies down next to the sleeping boy and turns out the light, exhaling.

It was a long day and Bella finds herself getting sleepy fast. She curls into Edward's warmth without thinking about it, and lets herself just relax.

Gasping awake at the sound of her cell phone blaring from the nightstand, Bella blinks away the brightness of the morning sun, and flails her arm around to reach for her phone, disoriented.

"'Ello?"

"Hello? That's all you've got to say to me?"

Bella's eyes widen as she moves to sit up, ignoring the way Edward tries to pull her back in, groaning at her movement.

"Ang, hey. I'm so, so, so, sorry."

"Save it, Swan." Bella grimaces. Angela has only called her by her surname once before, and that was when Bella got drunk and threw up in Angela's favorite shoes. "I cannot, can_not_ believe that you picked up and moved when I was out of town, because a best friend wouldn't just pick up and leave when her best friend was away on business."

"Bella," Edward grumbles. "I'm still sleepy, lay back down."

"Wait," Angela says. "Wait, are you with a _guy_? You've got to be fucking kidding me, right?"

"Angie, it's not what you think, just hold on," Bella says. "Please, I really want to talk to you."

Angela huffs, but doesn't hang up, so Bella puts her on hold, and leans over to Edward.

"Edward, I have to take this call, and I need to do this alone. Go back to sleep, ok? I'll be in the next room."

When he starts to shake his head, moving to wrap his fingers into her nightshirt, Bella says, "No Edward, no. You don't get a choice here. I'm going to make this call, and you're either going to sleep, or you're going to get up, and go eat breakfast with your family, but I'm going to take this call, got it?"

"I don't want you to go," he says, bottom lip trembling. "You'll come back right?"

"Of course," she tells him. "Of course I'll come back, Edward. Now, lay back down, I'll be in the other room, but I need to take this, ok?"

When Edward doesn't make a fuss, Bella hurries over to her own room, limping as fast as she can, closing the doors behind her for some sembalance of privacy.

"Hey Ang," she says into the phone, bringing her friend off hold. "Ok, so go ahead, lay into me. I know I'm a shitty friend, it's terrible, I know."

Angela sighs, and Bella closes her eyes, waiting. "It's not that you're a bad friend, Bells, it was just so sudden, you know? I mean, I leave for work, come back, check my messages, and you're telling my answering machine that you've packed up and traveled north? Are you ok?"

"Yeah, Angie, I mean, I'm alright, but like, I got a job and they paid for the move and everything, so it was like a 'now or never' kind of thing. I had to make a decision, Ang. I can't really explain it, but I think it will be good for me. I mean, you know I hated that job anyway," she says, smiling into the phone.

"Yeah, for sure you hated it. Did you even call Mike to quit?"

"No, I thought about it, but really, I think I'm gonna let him stew for a few days," she smirks, thinking about how he'll take it.

"You're bad, Bella," Angela laughs. "Really, but that doesn't explain why you're in bed with a guy I haven't heard of."

"Oh, you've-" she stops, hand flying to her mouth to stop her from ending with 'heard of him' and blinks at the close call. "Look, he's just a guy, you know? Nothing special."

"Ok, in all the years I've been your friend, you have _never_ hooked up with a stranger. What's wrong?" Angela's voice is strong and determined. Bella knows right now she's going to really have to try or she's going to give something up.

"Nothing, really, it's just complicated, and I can't explain it. I'm not in any trouble, I swear. I don't owe anyone money, I'm not in any physical danger, and I'm not depressed. I really just can't talk about it, and I need you to trust me."

"Bells…."

"Angie, please?"

"You're scaring me, Bella. What's wrong? Is someone listening to you right now? Is that why you're acting weird? Answer yes or no."

"No, Angie, I told you, I'm not in trouble, I just can't talk about it. I'm really fine, and I'm gonna go visit my dad this week too. I'm decorating my new space, and am generally happy, Angela. I'll call you and send you pictures all the time, ok?"

"I just don't want to be the friend that you talked to, and then hear on the news tonight that you've been kidnapped, Bella. You have to give me something here."

"Angie, I swear on our friendship, that I'm ok. I'm just going to pull a 'Walden' and find myself out in the wilderness. I'm not in danger."

Bella knows Angela's hesitant, and shit, if she were in her shoes, Bella would feel the same. She hears Angela's defeated sigh and knows that she'll let it drop for now.

"I swear Isabella Marie, if I don't hear from you every single day this week, I'm going to call Charlie and tell him I'm worried, got it?"

"Got it."

After amends have been made, Bella and Angela talk for a little longer about how Mike's going to react, and how Angela's trip was, and menial things like they would if they were out to lunch.

"God, it's going to be so difficult out here without you," Angela says softly. "How am I supposed to meet people out here, I mean really, I'm antisocial and you're the only one who gets me."

"Angie, you are smart, and beautiful, and if you try, you'll find someone, but they better not replace me, or I swear…."

"What, you'll come home? Oh look, that person right there looks like replacement best friend material," she jokes, and Bella can _see_ her smiling.

"You know what I mean, Angie. I'll call you as soon as I can tomorrow, and I'll send you pictures of my place, k?"

"I love you, Bells, please, just be safe? And don't think I forgot about the guy I heard on the phone. If this makes any progress, I'm gonna want to know."

"I love you too, Angela. I'll seriously camera phone so pictures to you right now. I'll call you tomorrow."

Getting off the phone, Bella does as promised and takes a few pictures of her room, her canopy bed, the bare walls, everything, and opens a new message to send them to Angela.

_Angie,_

_Here's some photos of my bedroom. The walls are bare now, but I've got a totally wicked sweet idea, I think you'll like it too. I want to paint the walls a neutral, like beige or sage or something, and then paint on staff lines and music notes. What do you say? I think I'm up for the challenge._

_Love you, _

_Bells._

When she sends the message, she smiles up to her walls, and gets off the bed, limping back through the bathroom toward Edward's room. When she gets back, she almost trips over Edward, asleep on the floor by the bathroom door.

"Edward, what?" She asks, moving carefully to squat down to nudge him awake. It hurts like hell to strain her knee like that, but she does it anyway, and nudges at his shoulder. "Edward, wake up, are you alright?"

"Bella?" He says, disoriented. "Oh, Bella, you're back," and then he smiles, sitting up, wiping at the sleep in his eyes. "I wasn't listening to your call, I swear, I just liked the sound of your voice on the phone."

She sighs, and uses the wall to support her as she tries to stand up. She grimaces and lets out a little noise in pain. She's overjoyed when Edward doesn't automatically help her, but asks, "Bella, oh god, are you ok? Please let me help you," voice panicked.

"I'm ok," she says, reaching her hand out for him. "It just hurts to kneel down like that."

He takes her hand and helps her up the rest of the way, wrapping her arm over his shoulder to help her walk back to the bed, not straining his hands at all.

"Please let me help you down the stairs this morning," he says softly. "Just until my dad looks at your leg again? You can ride piggy back if you want, I don't have to use my arms at all, I just. Please?"

She smiles, at him, sitting down on the bed. "I'm alright, Edward. I promise, but if it will make you more at ease, you can give me a piggy back ride, but only until we get to the kitchen, ok?"

His entire face lights up. "I promise, thank you, Bella. You're the greatest." When he stands, he helps Bella, up and starts to lead her to the hallway.

"Wait, Edward. I have to change," she says, looking down at her pajama shorts and tank top.

"You're beautiful," Edward shrugs. "You don't need to change, besides, this family lives in pajamas until noon, even Alice, if you can believe it."

Bella snorts, still blushing from his compliment, "That is something I will believe when I see."

So Edward grabs her brace and tells her to climb up onto his back. It's awkward at first, but when Edward puts his hands on the backs of her thighs and pushes her up a little, Bella wraps her legs around his waist, and then she's secure, and feels safe enough to go down the stairs with Edward. She takes a deep breath, and closes her eyes, not really wanting to watch as they tackle this challenge together.

"I won't drop you," he tells her, grinning wide as they head down the stairs. She rests her head on her arms, around his shoulders and keeps her eyes closed until they're on flat land, heading toward the kitchen.

"Ok, Edward, put me down," she says, insisting. Carlisle, Esme, Alice, and Jasper are already in the kitchen, sitting at the table, looking up curiously at her and Edward. "Edward, put me down," she says again.

Carlisle stands up, face neutral, and greets them good morning, pulling out a chair for Bella. Edward deposits her into the chair, and takes the seat next to her, squeezing her hand to get her attention.

When she looks at him, he looks from her, to her knee, to Carlisle, and then back at her, raising his eyebrows.

"What? Oh, oh," she says, laughing a little.

"Carlisle, my knee's a little sore, and I think I might have put a little too much strain on it this morning, waking _someone_ up off the floor."

Edward blushes, and shrugs his shoulder, reaching for the cereal and the milk, pouring two bowls.

"Well, I can take a look, but you should be icing it more, I think. We never got around to the e-stim last night, but today, you'll have to do it a few times, to stop the swelling. I'm also going to insist that the brace stays on all day."

She nods, and grabs for her spoon.

"Also, you'll need to stay off it most of the day, so no shopping."

Alice groans. "But Carlisle, we've got a lot to do today, and shopping is necessary."

Bella intervenes. "Actually Alice, I don't think it's really a good idea to go out in public quite yet," she says, pointing at Edward with the mouth of her spoon. "Plus, I've got some ideas anyway, and we can do all the brainstorming from home. We can do shopping next week, ok?"

"I agree with Bella," Carlisle says. "I think it's best that we give Edward time to adjust before we subject him to the public again."

Esme nods, grinning as she watches Edward eat his cereal. "Edward," she whispers, not sure if he'll respond to her. "Edward, do you want to help decorate Bella's room with us today?"

He looks up at her and then at Bella, and nods. "Yeah," he says, almost-smiling at his mother. Bella smiles at him and nudges him to say more than just that. "Yeah, I'd like to help, if I'm not in the way."

"You're never in the way," Esme says easily, laughing at him. "Except when we were painting your room when you grew out of your dinosaur phase. Remember all that paint on the carpet?"

Carlisle laughs then. "Oh yeah, all that blue paint on the white carpet, and then all the way down the stairs."

"It wasn't my fault the can got stuck on my foot," Edward says, smiling as he looks down.

"No, Edward, it wasn't," Esme says. "It was just so cute, I mean, the painters didn't even notice he was there, and then they didn't even realize he'd gotten stuck in a paint bucket until they heard him tromping down the stairs. It was the sweetest thing."

He scoffs, and blushes, looking up at Bella for an instant.

Esme sighs, smiling idyllically, like she's remembering every little detail. "Your foot was stained for days."

"So was the carpet," Carlisle says. "We ended up just putting in wood floors, and had to redo the hallway too." His voice is soft and fond, trying to gauge Edward's reaction.

"I like the hardwood flooring," he shrugs. "And I like the blue walls too," he smiles, first at Esme, and then Carlisle.

"So do we, Edward, so do we."

-------------------------------------

a/n: this project is kind of my baby. The term "Superman Complex" is completely my own fabricated diagnosis. I have no medical background, although, I'm asking a psych major if things do make sense. Many, many thanks to **­­**_**the­-glory-days**_, as always, for kicking me in the ass every time I stop writing. In the mean time, check out her story **ALPHABET WEEKENDS** if you haven't already. She's absolutely insane. (Knew her before she got ff-famous ;] _yeahhh boyyyy)_

Updates will be few and far between, but because they're so much longer than my other chapter updates, I hope that's alright with you guys. So, few and far between tends to mean something like 'whenever I finish writing it. **The reviews really help me write faster, so keep them coming. **

A question was brought up a few times, so I thought I'd address it here:

Ages – Bella, 24, Alice, 24, Rosalie, 25 Edward, 26, Jasper, 26, Emmett, 26.

Really though, the ages don't make much of a difference, if you think of them as a little older, that's fine. The main thing to understand is that Bella is taking on a lot for such a young age. Other than that, if you want Edward to be twenty-eight and Alice to be 22, cool beans. :D

**Reviews are appreciated. I'd love to hear your feedback :]**


	5. Chapter 5

Edward Cullen is a rock star in the biggest band of the decade. He's America's "It Boy," but he's still unhappy. Will Bella be in time to save him? AH AU

Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer is the genius who created Twilight, I'm just toying around with her characters.

Superman Complex

As requested, Bella stays off her leg for the entirety of the day. Carlisle gets crutches for her to use, just for the day, to take the strain off of it. He also insists that she do e-stim every three hours to avoid over-swelling. This news, of course, upsets Alice and Esme, because they had plans to drag Bella out for shopping.

Both Esme and Alice realize that taking Edward out in public probably wouldn't be the best idea, so instead, Alice sits Bella down on her bed, in her new room, and sets up a laptop with a virtual design simulator.

With Alice on one side, and Esme on the other, they put in the room's dimefnsions, the placement and dimensions of the bed, nightstands, bureau, desk, and chair, and ask Bella what else she wants to do.

"Well," she starts, looking over to Edward, who's leaning against the footboard of the bed with Bella's feet in his lap. "I kind of wanted to paint this accent wall here," she points to the screen, "A neutral, like beige, and then paint staff lines and notes from a song. I think Edward and I could do that, once my leg starts to feel better?"

Edward's face beams with a smile, nodding enthusiastically.

"Alright, so the base coat would be a neutral, I can have that done this week, so it will be dry and ready for the staff lines?" Esme asks, typing in specifications into the laptop.

"So neutral beige," Alice says, nodding. "How about a light sage for the rest of the walls, Esme?"

"That sounds great, Bella. What do you think?"

"That sounds great to me," she grins, looking from Esme to Alice, then to Edward.

"Then from the paint sample, we can get bedding, and artwork," Alice says animatedly. "Oh, and reupholster the desk chair."

"I don't need all that," Bella shakes her head. "The bedding we have now is fine, painting the walls is understandable, but everything else is totally unnecessary."

"Bella, this is your home now, you can do whatever you want to this room," Esme grins.

"Plus, we haven't even started on the bathroom. It's a bummer because we wanted to talk bath supplies, and really, I can't do that unless you're with me to smell things, so…"

"It is very plain," Esme nods. "But Bella, you can pick it out, and Alice and I can go pick it all up."

"Alice, you just gave me that bag of stuff," Bella tries, internally scowling. "You don't have to buy me anything."

"That won't last long, Bella," Alice whines, pouting.

"You really should just let them go, Bella." Edward says. "Tell them what you like, and they'll get it for you. Ally loves to shop."

"Oh, Edward, I love when you're on my side!" Alice grins, sitting up to pat his hand.

To Bella's surprise, Edward doesn't even flinch at the contact. She makes a mental note to test that again later, and to tell Carlisle about it. When she looks at Alice, the grin she's sporting leaves Bella temporarily blinded, her own smile widening as a result.

"He's right you know," Esme smiles, looking from Bella to Edward. "We love to shop, and now we have a real excuse."

Bella sighs. She knows she's stuck now, regardless of everything else, she's going to have to let them shop for her… doesn't mean she has to like it though.

"Well? What kind of smells do you like? I didn't get a chance to look at your bathroom supplies at the apartment back in Phoenix. The movers said that anything already open was a no-go, so we had to trash it."

Bella's eyes widen, "Almost everything was open. I-" she stops, groaning. Every time she bought a new shampoo, conditioner, moisturizer, lotion, body wash, you name it, she tried it out to test it. Bella tries to think back to what her bathroom looked like, does some simple calculation, and whimpers when she estimates the cost that is now waste.

"Don't worry, we'll buy all new stuff for you."

She sighs. "I hate to break it to you, but I really, _really_, hate when people spend money on me." That's putting it lightly, she adds silently. "I just won't feel right about all this."

Edward scoffs. "Get used to it." Bella shoots him a murderous look and shakes her head. "Traitor," she mumbles, then smiles up at him, unable to glare any longer.

"Damn straight," Alice says, winking.

"So, Bella, smells? What colors do you want in your bathroom? Please let me decorate your bathroom. I know just the thing." Alice spits it out so fast, Bella really can't comprehend it, so she looks at Alice curiously, and then, "What exactly do you have in mind?"

"Well, I was thinking we'd stay neutral, and use a combination of homey smells like vanilla, honey, shay butter, and brown sugar, and then go floral with jasmine and freesia. If we go with that, the artwork can be kind of floral, kind of neutral, nothing flashy, or off the wall. What do you think, Edward?"

"I think Bella needs candles," he says, looking at Bella, nodding with a smile on his face, still not acknowledging Alice, but when Bella looks over to Alice, she doesn't look at all upset, still beaming in fact, happy that he answered at all, Bella assumes.

"Oh yeah, definitely. Maybe a vase with eucalyptus and wildflowers or something?"

She can see her mind working, the cogs grinding. "Alice?" Bella says, hands up.

"Please do not go overboard today when you're out?"

Edward laughs, and Esme giggles, nodding along with Edward's start. "Oh honey," she says. "'Overboard' is Alice's middle name."

*

Esme and Alice drag Jasper out and about an hour later, with the laptop and the specifications in hand, giving Edward and Bella some time to relax before lunch. As they go, Bella hears Alice babbling on about how much fun every thing will be. She almost, _almost_, feels bad for Jasper.

Carlisle is on the phone with some of his associates again, has been for the majority of the day, and Rosalie… well, Bella's pretty much positive that Rosalie is avoiding her.

Emmett comes down to join Edward and Bella in the kitchen when he hears the clicking of the gas stovetop. He grins at Bella and hops up onto the counter. Bella looks up, leaning on her crutches as she gets the flat plan out from the cabinet. She just looks, watches as Emmett watches her, knowing it will only be a matter of time before he breaks their silence.

"So, whatcha makin' Jellybean?"

Bella is about to answer with 'sandwiches', until -

"Wait, what? Jellybean?"

"Well, I figured you wouldn't let me call you Jelly Belly, so Jellybean it is," he grins, triumphantly. Bella compares this face to Angela's nephew last year on Easter when he found the $50 egg in the grass.

"Well Emmett, I'm just making some grilled sandwiches for lunch," she says, shaking her head fondly. "Would you like to partake in the festivities?"

Emmett looks from Bella to Edward. "You ok with me crashing your lunch?" he asks, shrugging his shoulders.

"If Bella is ok, I'm ok?" Edward answers, in a question, looking to Bella. She wonders if him avoiding other people is a stage, and makes another mental note to ask Carlisle. She also decides to make a mental note to get a notebook, so she doesn't have to make so many mental notes through out the day.

Nodding, she tells Emmett to take a seat, and then, "Do you think Rose and Carlisle would like something?"

"Carlisle for sure," Emmett nods. "I doubt he's eaten since this morning, but Rosie…."

Edward sighs, but Bella nods in understanding. "No, I get it, it's ok. I'll just make a few extras, and if she says no, you can just have them, alright Emmett?" Looking at him, Bella can see the question in his eyes, to see if she's really ok, but she starts up the flat plate on the stove, lines up the sourdough and oils the bottoms. She makes one veggie, layering mozzarella, tomato, basil, and avocado. Two with sliced turkey, and two with ham. The avocado and basil in the veggie smell so good, she sets it aside and saves it for herself.

She presses them with a spatula until the cheese starts to melt, and when it does, she makes sure they're warmed through before she pulls them off and puts them on plates for everyone. It's a quick fix for lunch, and healthy. Something she used to make for herself back in college, in between classes.

Carlisle comes down, takes one look at Bella in the kitchen and scowls, much like Edward. She knows it's because of his 'orders' to stay off her leg, so she grins, wiggles her leg, and laughs, handing a plate to Edward to set on the table. "See, no pressure. I've got crutches, and Edward's helping me plate everything. Now, no arguing. Ham or turkey?"

"Turkey," Carlisle says, winking at her as he goes to sit. "We have chips in the pantry too. Emmett, you want to get some for us?" When Emmett mock-salutes, he walks over to the cupboard, and Carlisle calls up the stairs. "Rosalie, lunch."

Bella looks at Edward, and then shrugs her shoulders. If Rosalie comes down and causes a scene, then oh well. "Hopefully she's hungry enough to be civil with me," she whispers to Edward, smirking at him.

He giggles and gets up to get drinks for the two of them. When he sits back down, he asks, "Is this alright, Bella?" passing her a bottle of grape juice from the fridge. "We have soda too, if you want soda."

"Not Edward, this is fine," she says, patting his hand. She notices, as she looks up, that no one has started eating, everyone waiting for Rosalie. She does the same, smiling up at Emmett, showing him that she really is alright. While they wait, Bella thinks back to a week ago, the first time she'd met Emmett McCarty. To when he told her that she needed to leave, that she couldn't stay and be there when Edward woke up. Now, Emmett is more like her big brother, a figure she never had in her life until now. Now she has both Emmett and Jasper to fill those rolls, but it's Emmett that surprises her the most.

Emmett was utterly against her staying while they were in the hospital, and now, two days after being back in Forks, Emmett has changed his tune. Maybe Rosalie will take more time to come around, but Bella hopes it doesn't take too long.

Right as Bella's about to cut into her sandwich, tired of waiting and almost positive that Rosalie isn't coming, she hears the tell-tale sounds of Rosalie's heels clicking down the hardwood flooring of the stairs.

"Rosie," Emmett says, smiling big. "Bella made lunch, want some?"

"Yeah," Bella nods. "There's turkey and ham paninis." _Please, take my peace offering, I'm handing it to you._

"I'm a vegetarian," Rosalie says, hands crossed over her chest. Now, Bella saw her eating Canadian bacon pizza last night, but instead of arguing, Bella smiles and offers up her plate.

"Here, you can have mine, it's a vegetarian sandwich," she says, smiling sincerely. She doesn't look up at Emmett or at Edward, or even at Carlisle, she keeps her eyes focused on Rosalie, watches as Rosalie sighs, grabs for the plate and sits down next to Emmett, across from Bella at the table.

When Bella does look away, she sees Emmett nudging at Rosalie's elbow, shoving at her, murmuring, _liar_, under his breath, just audible for Bella and Edward to hear.

Grabbing for a ham sandwich, Bella looks over to Edward and nods understandingly. Edward's scowl looks almost painful, but as soon as he catches Bella looking at him, the scowl disappears instantly, replacing itself with a warm smile as he takes a bite of his own sandwich.

After a few tense minutes, Rosalie huffs loudly. Bella looks up and sees Rosalie's piercing blue eyes glaring right at her.

"So I'm not a vegetarian," she says, head held high. "Whatever. Thanks."

"You're welcome, Rosalie," Bella says, no hint of superiority in her voice. "I won't be offended if you want a meat sandwich instead of the veggie. We can trade if you want."

"That's not necessary, Bella," Carlisle says, intervening. "Rosalie can finish the veggie panini."

Bella nods, looks back to Rosalie just in time to catch her rolling her eyes, looking down at her plate.

Bella counts this as a victory.

*

Resting upstairs in Edward's room, Bella helps Edward fall asleep, running her fingers through his hair softly. Not long after, she hears Alice and Esme coming up the stairs. Their voices are only second to the sounds of plastic bags swishing against their legs on the way up.

Trying not to wake Edward, Bella takes her time getting up, staying by Edward's side a little longer, just to make sure he'll sleep fine without her there, and then grabs for her crutches to see the damage. She hobbles through the bathroom and into what was once her bedroom.

Now it just looks like ground zero for a shopping explosion.

Taking in the room, Bella sees that Esme's already covered the floor with a painting blanket and has already taped off all the floor boards. Her bed now looks like a breeding ground for designer shopping bags, and her desk is now the harbor for paints, brushes, rollers, rolls of wallpaper, and a few frames. What couldn't fit on the bed and desk lay in waiting on the floor. How they were able to get everything upstairs before Bella heard them coming is a mystery.

"Esme, Alice," Bella begins. "What on Earth is all this?"

Esme looks to Alice, Alice looks to Esme, and then… Alice just explodes in a verbal assault to Bella's ears. She starts jabbering on about everything, and Bella tries, but only catches a few words like "ruined", and "moving trunk", and "clothes." Hand up, palm out, Bella stops Alice from going any further.

"One more time, Alice, only slower."

This time, Esme tries, "Well, Alice got a call from the movers, and they had a bit of a malfunction on the hydraulic gate, and well… long story short, most of your clothes were ruined."

Bella groans. "Could this move get any worse?"

"Only a majority got ruined, not everything, and to compensate for their mistake, they're not charging us for the move at all. There are still two boxes of clothes left, but we don't know what is in them, so we just bought some necessities, until we find out what you need. Then, when your leg is feeling better, we can go shopping."

Again, all Bella can do is groan, but she goes deeper into the shopping explosion and sits in the aftermath, pushing things around to get comfortable.

"The movers and the painters will be here tomorrow, but for now, I can decorate your bathroom," Alice smiles, a little sheepish, probably upset about the clothes Bella has lost. "You go ahead and rummage through everything, and if there's anything you don't like, set it aside, so we can return it."

Alice bounces into the bathroom, three bags on each arm, and leaves Bella and Esme alone to go through the clothes.

"You didn't have to do this, Esme," Bella whispers. "Really, I don't need all this."

"Yes we did, little one," Esme smiles. "It is indirectly our fault that most of your clothes are ruined." Bella shakes her head, but Esme continues. "You don't understand, Bella. Carlisle and I are so grateful to you, we'd give you _anything_ if it made you happy. He told me about Edward's progress…" she pauses, running the pad of her index finger under her eye to swipe at a tear. "You saved my son, Bella. You've saved him in so many ways; my little boy. You. I." Esme breaks down then, grabbing for Bella's hand and holding it tight. "I don't know what was going through his head when he tried to…. And I don't know what's going through your head now, but what I do know is that I would give anything I could to keep you happy here with us. You're an angel, and you make him happy. We'd do anything, and will do anything, to keep you comfortable. We've asked a lot of you, in a very short amount of time, but you've taken everything so well, and you're being so strong."

"Esme," Bella says, a teary smile on her face. "You don't need to give me anything, you're family has-"

"See? That's exactly why we _do_ need to do things for you. You haven't asked us for a thing, you're so strong. So, if Alice and I go a little overboard, trying to buy things to make you feel comfortable, like this is your home, it's because you mean so much to this family, so much to Edward."

Bella doesn't know exactly what to say, so instead she just smiles and squeezes Esme's hand.

"Just this once, Esme, just this once."

Esme laughs, wipes the tears off her face, and stands. "I'll go help Alice in the bathroom, you go through all the clothes, and we'll discuss everything else later."

Bella nods and pulls a bag onto her lap. It's going to be a long afternoon.

With Esme and Alice in the bathroom, Edward asleep in his room, and every one else away, Bella relaxes in solitude for the first time since meeting Edward Cullen in the labyrinth back in Phoenix. She leans back into the headboard and starts to pull out articles of clothing. Everything (of course) is her size, down to the underwear, and while most is _way_ out of her price range, it's also all things she would probably wear.

After the first bag, Bella conditions herself to just avoid the tags and when she does, she stops looking at the situation negatively, and actually enjoys herself.

An hour passes peacefully and quietly before the calm gives way to the storm. Bella is pulled from her retail reverie by a piercing scream, followed quickly by, "Bella, Carlisle, come quick!"

Forgoing the crutches, (she'll face Carlisle's wrath later) Bella runs through the bathroom and into Edward's room where Edward is on the floor, eyes shut, pulling at his stitches, with Rosalie standing above him.

"I don't know what happened. One minute, I was sitting with him, talking to him on the bed, and the next, he jumped off, landed on the floor, and started pulling off his bandages," Rosalie says, shell-shocked, shaking like a leaf.

Bella nods understandingly, moving her away, rubbing her arm in comfort, and then, "Emmett, come in here, Rose needs you!" She slides down to the floor, ignoring the instant throbbing of her knee and pulls at Edward's hands, pushing into the open skin, stopping the blood. She's maybe hyperventilating, or at least panicking, as she holds his wrists and then turns him over to straddle him, knees on either side of his waist, holding his bloodied wrists down to the floor, staring down at him.

"Edward Cullen, look at me," she whispers fiercely, letting everything else around them disappear. "It's just you and me, Edward, look at me."

He opens his eyes, and what Bella was hoping for isn't there at all. His eyes are _black_ with rage, mouth set into a deep and angry hatred. "You and me?! _You_ were gone!" he yells out, fighting against her, bucking his hips up at her, trying to free himself. "You left me! I _hate_ you!"

Bella gasps and freezes for an instant, just long enough for Edward to push her off of him, back into the bed, hard enough that she's sure she'll have a bruise where the frame hit her back. Alice and Esme scream when Bella cries out, but Edward is undeterred. He comes right up in her face and stares her down, like he's about to attack.

"I'm not afraid of you," she says, voice shaking, her bottom lip trembling. "I'm not afraid of you, and no matter what you do or say to me right now, I'm not leaving you. I'll never leave you, Edward."

For a second, Bella sees his eyes change, shift, like he hears what she says, hears and believes it, but then the black comes back, and the scowl, and he's pushing her shoulder blades back into the bed frame, knees on either sides of her hips.

Their positions have been reversed.

"Edward, let her go, you're hurting her," Alice says, voice high and tight with confusion and fear. Briefly, Bella looks to her, makes sure Jasper is with her, and then focuses on Edward.

Her leg is bent awkwardly, but after everything, it's the last thing on her mind, as the blood from his wrists trickles down his hands and onto her shirt. "Edward," she says softly. "I'll never leave you."

"_Liar!_" he shouts, pushing her back harder. "You're a liar. You were _gone!_ I _hate _you."

She takes a second, brings her hand up and cups her palm to his cheek, holding his face. Without thinking, he nuzzles into the palm, and Bella watches as Edward's face changes, as his eyes go from coal black to emerald green.

"There you are," she says softly. "It's ok, Edward, it's ok. I'm here."

"Bella," he whimpers, letting go of her shoulders. "What have I done?" He looks so terrified, so ashamed, Bella just shakes her head.

"It's ok, Edward. You were scared. We all get scared," she tells him, bringing her hand away from his cheek, down to cup his wrist. She brings her other hand up to cup the other wrist, and looks into his eyes. "Edward, you have to let Carlisle help you, do you understand?"

Her voice is firm, but still gentle, so he knows she's not mad. She isn't really, just confused. Her adrenaline is running high, she's shaking, but she doesn't hurt, not yet.

"Do you understand?"

"Oh Bella, I'm so, so sorry," he cries, tears running down his cheeks as he rests his head in the crux of her neck. "Please don't leave me, please. I didn't mean it. I don't hate you, I swear, Bella. Please."

"I told you I wouldn't leave you," she whispers, her lips resting against the shell of his ear. She looks up, catches Carlisle's eye and nods, beckoning him to help. "Now, Carlisle is going to help you, understand?"

When Edward nods, Carlisle kneels down and takes the first wrist. "We're just gonna have to do some new stitches," he says, evaluating the damage. "Then bandage them back up." He hands Bella a pill and looks at Edward.

"Edward, I need you to take this, ok?" Bella says. She knows, right now, that Edward will not argue, and when he opens his mouth, he swallows it down dry. "It will make you feel better, ok? Just a pain killer so it doesn't hurt anymore."

He nods and Carlisle comes in to clean everything up, wipes away all the blood, dabs the wounds with iodine, and applies pressure, so the bleeding will slow enough that he can fix the stitches.

"Bella," he says soft, pulling her out of her reverie. She looks up, then he continues. "Can you hold this down for me, so I can start the sutures?" As Bella moves her hand to hold down the compress, Edward sighs and shifts down to lean further onto Bella.

"I don't hate you," he whispers again. "Swear I don't." His voice is soft and drowsy already.

"Is the medication already kicking in?" Bella asks, looking to Carlisle as he stitches the wound.

Carlisle shakes his head 'no' and says, "Not yet, but I imagine that this is his body's way of shutting down. Regardless of the emotional trauma, the physical damage is wearing him out." He says, finishing the first wrist, moving to the second.

"Bella?" Alice whispers, capturing her attention. "Bella, are you alright? Your leg, its…" When Alice stops, Bella looks down at her bent and twisted leg under Edward, and shrugs, moving it slightly to straighten it out. She tries to keep her face neutral, but fails, the emotion caught by Edward, who whimpers into her neck.

"Bella, please don't leave me. I didn't mean to."

"No matter what you do or say today, or any other day in the future, I won't leave you, Edward," she tells him softly, rubbing her free hand down his back, down the knobs of his spine. "Never."

Carlisle finishes up the dressing on the first hand and shifts to Edward's other side to do the other, and starts to clean up Bella's hand, wiping up the blood before he starts on Edward's other wrist.

"Bella," Carlisle whispers. "You have to tell him he was wrong. If you don't reprimand him now, the next time he's in this state, he'll do it again, possibly with more violence; no matter how sorry he may be right now."

Bella nods in understanding, but doesn't tell Edward anything, not while the entire family is watching them. Carlisle sighs, but finishes the sutures and pulls both Edward and Bella off the bedroom floor.

"Alice, go clear off Bella's bed, clean up her room a bit so she can take Edward in there," Esme says calmly, giving out directions. "Bella, can you get Edward out of his bloody clothes so he can rest?"

"Emmett and I will clean up this mess," Carlisle nods, heading to the bathroom to wash his hands and his equipment. "Rosalie, go get a bucket and hot water, bring it back up here so we can clean up this mess. Jasper, go help Alice clean Bella's room up. Esme, go down, make some tea for everyone to calm down, please?"

There's a collective nod from the family, and then everyone disperses, except for Bella, Edward, Carlisle and Emmett. Emmett goes for the bedding, Carlisle grabs the rug, and they toss it to the side of the room, waiting for Rosalie to return. Bella pulls Edward into the bathroom slowly, watching to make sure he's coherent enough to walk, both of them leaning into each other. She helps him out of his soiled clothes in the bathroom, dropping his shirt and jeans into the sink, leaving him in his boxers to sleep in.

They wait for a minute, leaning against the counter in the bathroom, while Jasper and Alice finish up, and then Bella takes him into the room to lay him down, covering him with her comforter.

"Hey, Edward, look at me," she says. When he does, she continues. "Edward, what happened back there was not ok, do you understand?" Edward's eyes close, and he tries to look away. "No, look at me, baby, look at me." When his eyes open, Bella smiles at him, cupping his cheek with her palm. "Edward, I know you were scared, I know that, but what you did cannot happen again, ok? You got hurt, and you hurt me pretty bad back there-"

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you, I really didn't Bella, you have to believe me."

"Edward, no, I know, it's ok. I'm going to be alright, but you can't do it again, baby. You just can't do that. You could have really hurt yourself again, or even Rosalie, when you woke up like that."

"Rosalie doesn't like you," he says, like it's a justification for his actions.

"Edward Cullen, you know better than that. Rosalie is just wary because she loves you, and you should be ashamed to have even thought that."

"I'm sorry," he whispers.

"I have half a mind to make you apologize to Rose for that."

His eyes go wide, so she shakes her head. "I won't make you apologize, but I do want you to address the family and apologize when you feel like you can. Your poor mother was terrified."

He nods in understanding, and Bella leans over to kiss his forehead. "Go to sleep, little one," she murmurs, even though he's older than her. "I'll be here when you wake up."

When his breathing evens out, she gets up, this time, grabbing for the crutches that she'd abandoned when she heard Rosalie scream earlier, and limps to the closet for one of the new sundresses Alice picked out for her.

After skimming through the closet, she decides on a lightweight blue dress. The bust line is a little low for her liking, but it is soft, with a Moroccan pattern on it, dark blue with gold and light blue accent work.

[view dress in profile]

She isn't exactly sure how Alice knew her sizes so perfectly, but as Bella slipped out of her bloody clothes, and into her new dress, she realizes that it fit her like a glove. Smoothing it down, she grabs her dirty clothes and crutches her way to the bathroom to clean up a bit.

Walking into the bathroom, she looks at her reflection, patting down her dress in the front, looking at the side and then the back.

_Edward would love this dress_, she thinks to herself, instantly shaking the thought from her head, giggling at herself.

When she turns around, Bella gasps, falling back into the counter as she sees Rosalie sitting in the bathtub, holding her knees to her chest.

"I just. Oh Bella, I didn't mean to do that, I. I was just sitting in with him, and when he started to freak out, I ran my hand through his hair, and then. I. He."

"Rose, it wasn't your fault. He's going to have outbursts like this, and there's nothing we can do but be here for him when they're over," Bella says, moving to sit on the lip of the tub, leaning the crutches against the wall. "You didn't do anything wrong, Rosalie. Do you understand?"

Rosalie nods after a second. Bella smiles and reaches to help her out of the tub.

"Listen, we got off to a bad start," Rosalie says quietly, obviously not used to apologizing for her actions. "I didn't think we needed you here," she shrugs. "I mean, you were just some girl, some stranger, and I thought we could do it without you. Then, when I saw you on the plane, giggling at whatever Edward was saying, I thought you were just a _Twilight_ groupie, looking for a story, or blackmail material." She pauses for a second, looking up to smile guiltily at Bella. "I was wrong about everything. We can't help him without you, I saw that today, and you aren't here looking for a quick salary advance. I. God, when he pushed you back like that, into the bed frame, I just… Are you alright?"

Bella nods, smiling. "Yeah, my shoulders are a bit sore, and my knee is in need of a bath right about now, but other than that…"

"Hey, I can help with that," Rosalie says. "I'll get the clothes out of the bathroom, take them down to the wash room after I draw a bath for you."

"Oh, no Rosalie, I'm fine, you don't have to."

"No, please, just let me help? I owe you one hell of an apology, and my gratitude for saving Edward…again. Please just let me do this for you."

Without letting Bella answer, Rosalie grabs the clothes away from Bella, and sets them with the others in the sink. When Bella smiles up at Rosalie, Rosalie grins back wide and genuine at Bella, and helps turn the tabs on and get the bath bubbles ready.

"Alice went all out," Rosalie says, chuckling lightly as she looks under the cabinet. "Bathroom looks good though, no?"

"Oh yeah, it looks great," Bella agrees. "She went crazy in my closet too."

Rosalie laughs, "Sounds like Alice," with a nod, and pours the bubble bath in, making sure they foam up. When it's full, Rosalie takes a step back and asks, "Want me to help you in?"

"Oh, no," Bella waves. "I'm fine, thank you though, Rose, you really didn't have to."

"I did," Rosalie counters. "I did because I was stubborn and I was wrong, and Jesus. Just… thank you for staying."

"Even _you_ couldn't have scared me away," Bella winks, laughing.

Rosalie heads for the door, grabbing the clothes on her way out to Edward's room, where the boys are still cleaning. "I'll tell the guys to take a break for a bit, so you can relax."

Bella mock salutes, still laughing.

"Oh, and Bella?" Rosalie says, almost out the door. "You look hot in that dress. Alice did good."

Bella blushes as Rose laughs, closing the door as she leaves. Shaking her head, Bella slips out of the dress, hangs it over the counter, and wraps a towel around her. Before getting into the tub, she grabs for her crutches and walks back to her room, where Edward is sleeping soundly.

"Edward, honey, I'm gonna go shower. Go back to sleep, and I'll be in the bathroom if you wake up, ok?"

Edward grumbles a little, just kind of whimpers into Bella's hand, nuzzling into her warmth.

"Edward, did you hear me?"

He nods, reaches up to grab her hand, and lets his head tilt to kiss at the inside of her wrist. "Ok Bella," he says softly, groggy from sleep. He leaves one more open mouthed kiss on her pulse point and then holds onto it until Bella pulls it away.

Lip tucked between her teeth to hold in a moan, Bella stands up, glad his eyes are still closed so he can't see her blush, or her towel, and heads back to the bathroom.

As she walks back, crutching her way toward the bathroom door, Edward says, "Bella," soft and quiet. When she turns around, his eyes are open, and he's smiling. "I think I love you, Bella." Now, it's Edward's turn to blush. "I've never felt what I feel for you for anyone else."

Bella blushes then, deeper than before, and looks away from his piercing green eyes. He clears his throat, and before she can look back up at him, he's in front of her, clad only in boxers and bandages, and wraps his fingers around her hips, over the towel.

It's shocking for her, at first, and she gasps and loses her footing. Since he's got a hold of her, she doesn't go anywhere, just stays held safely in his hands.

"It's not because of my condition, Bella," he tells her. "You are the most compassionate person I've ever met, ever known. Compared to my mother, you're like Mother Teresa, and… and I've never felt like this before."

"Edward," Bella says, looking down.

"No," he shakes his head, pulling her closer to him, wrapping his arm around her waist. "This isn't the condition, Bella. You are the best thing about me. You're the _one_."

Bella gasps, and gets out of his grasp to balance on her crutches. "Don't Edward, please."

"I have to," he says, pleading. "I _have_ to tell you this now. You have to know the truth."

"Edward, you're not yourself right now, you can't do this to me," she shakes her head, trying not to cry. "You can't give me that little gem to think about right now. "You're sick, and I'm here for you, always, but I _can't_ be that for you."

"Bella, please. I. I feel like me right now, I feel like me, more than I've felt like me in weeks, even before –" he doesn't say it, but Bella knows he's thinking about the labyrinth. "I feel like me again, and I'm afraid I won't feel like me again, and I have to tell you now, before I. I."

Bella sighs, eyes closing slowly as she looks down.

"I have to tell you that I love you now because if I wake up and am disoriented again, I don't want you to think I didn't mean it. I mean it with everything I am."

She swallows hard and shakes her head. "Edward, you're sick. What if this is the condition talking. I saved you," she says. "What if you're confusing love and gratitude?"

"No, it's not the same," he says, taking a step forward again, wrapping both of his arms around her, one splayed at the line of her towel between her shoulders, the other around her waist. "Tell me you don't feel something for me," he says, resting his forehead against hers. "Tell me you don't, Bella."

"Edward, please," she whimpers, closing her eyes again. "Don't do this to me."

"Do this to you? Bella, you stole my heart at the worst possible time. Why did you have to do this to _me?_"

Bella shakes her head, pulling her head away from his, reaching down to uncoil him off of her. "Edward, think this through. Think about this, ok? You just got out of the hospital yesterday; we haven't even really known each other for a week. You can't love me."

"I know I shouldn't, but I do," he says adamantly. "I just _know_."

"Please, just. Not now, ok? I really need to take a bath, and you need to sleep, just lay down, ok?"

"I'm not giving up on you, Bella," he says, tightening his grip on her, leaning down to brush her nose with his, breathing her in. "I won't take it back either, and when all of this condition stuff is behind us, I'm going to tell you that I love you, and I'm going to mean it just as much then as I do right now, in this room, in this situation."

Bella's breath hitches, and Edward swoops in and kisses her, his hands holding him to her completely, licking at her bottom lip. She tries, she tries so hard to resist, but as his lips caress hers, she can't not kiss back, and so she does, kissing him with everything she can, crying silently.

When he pulls back, he wipes at her tears, and leans in once more to kiss her softly. "I'm sorry," he whispers. "I'm sorry that I had to meet you like this." He untangles himself and makes sure she's steady on her feet before he walks back to her bed and lays down, covering himself back up.

Bella hobbles to the bathroom, closes the door, and climbs into the tub.

She cries until she can't cry anymore, when the waters chilled and the bubbles are gone. When Alice comes in to check on her, Bella's got her head on her knees, a vacant expression on her face. She can hear Alice talking to her, can hear her asking if she's alright, but for the life of her, Bella can't answer… doesn't want to anymore.

When she doesn't respond, Alice leaves Bella alone for a minute, and then comes back with Emmett and Carlisle. Alice wraps her up in a towel as best she can, and pulls the plug out of the tub, and Emmett pulls her out of the water and out of the bathroom. He lays her on Edward's bed, and Alice comes in to cover her up further, dries her off, and then Carlisle starts talking to her, asking her questions.

"I can't do this anymore, Carlisle," she whispers, blinking. "I'm sorry, I just can't do this anymore."

-------------------------------------

a/n: don't hate me?

a/n ii: this project is kind of my baby. The term "Superman Complex" is completely my own fabricated diagnosis. I have no medical background, although, I'm asking a psych major if things do make sense. Many, many thanks to the-glory-days, as always, for kicking me in the ass every time I stop writing. In the mean time, check out her story ALPHABET WEEKENDS if you haven't already. She's absolutely insane. (Knew her before she got ff-famous ;] yeahhh boyyyy)

Updates will be few and far between, but because they're so much longer than my other chapter updates, I hope that's alright with you guys. So, few and far between tends to mean something like 'whenever I finish writing it. The reviews really help me write faster, so keep them coming.

**A question was brought up a few times, so I thought I'd address it here: **

**Ages – Bella, 24, Alice, 24, Rosalie, 25 Edward, 26, Jasper, 26, Emmett, 26. **

**Really though, the ages don't make much of a difference, if you think of them as a little older, that's fine. The main thing to understand is that Bella is taking on a lot for such a young age. Other than that, if you want Edward to be twenty-eight and Alice to be 22, sweet beans. :D**

Reviews are appreciated. I'd love to hear your feedback :]


	6. Chapter 6

Edward Cullen is a rock star in the biggest band of the decade. He's America's "It Boy," but he's still unhappy. Will Bella be in time to save him? AH AU

Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer is the genius who created **Twilight**, I'm just toying around with her characters.

**a/n: sorry about the delay. I totally left you hanging. Enjoy this one :D**

_Chapter 5:_

She can hear Alice talking to her, can hear her asking if she's alright, but for the life of her, Bella can't answer… doesn't want to anymore.

When she doesn't respond, Alice leaves Bella alone for a minute, and then comes back with Emmett and Carlisle. Alice wraps her up in a towel as best she can, and pulls the plug out of the tub, and Emmett pulls her out of the water and out of the bathroom. He lays her on Edward's bed, and Alice comes in to cover her up further, dries her off, and then Carlisle starts talking to her, asking her questions.

"I can't do this anymore, Carlisle," she whispers, blinking. "I'm sorry, I just can't do this anymore."

Bella watches as Carlisle smiles sadly down at her, hears Alice's gasp, but doesn't say anything more. There's nothing more to say really, not for her. Bella thinks herself a failure, she's failed Edward, failed Carlisle, failed Esme, failed herself.

"What happened, Bella?" Carlisle asks softly, sitting down on the bed next to Bella, pulling the comforter over her shoulders; it smells like Edward. She almost kicks if off, but stops, looks at Carlisle and shakes her head. "Bella, please talk to me."

Bella looks him in the eye, and then looks over his shoulder at Alice. She smiles sadly and takes the hint, closing the door behind her as she leaves to give Bella and Carlisle some privacy.

"I wasn't prepared for this, Carlisle," she says softly. "I thought I was, and I thought I could, but I can't."

"No, Bella, you are. You are helping, remember what we talked about? You've helped him so much."

"Remember when we talked about how Edward would be?" she asks. "In the hospital after Dr. Crowley tried to tell me about Edward's sexual appetite?"

"What did he do?" Carlisle asks, sitting up straight, worried, almost frantic. "Bella, did Edward hurt you?"

"No, no, Carlisle, please. It wasn't like that," she says, shaking her head, waiting for him to calm down. "Just, I asked you what happens if he falls in love with me, remember? And you said we'd cross that bridge when we got to it?" She pauses. "Carlisle, I'm at the river, drowning, and the bridge I'm supposed to cross is nonexistent."

"What are you saying, Bella?"

Bella sighs and sits up, tucking the comforter at her sides, under her armpits, like a security shield for her mangled heart. "I'm saying that he said he loved me."

"Oh dear."

Laughing mirthlessly, Bella nods. "My thoughts exactly."

She lets Carlisle think on that little gem for a minute, and then adds, "It was weird though, how he said it," she shrugs. "He said he felt like himself for the first time in weeks, even before he tried to…"

Carlisle nods, seemingly taking everything Bella's telling him into consideration.

Bella continues, "He said it wasn't the condition, and it wasn't his way of thanking me. He said it was love, not gratitude. Carlisle, I'm not… I'm not strong enough."

Carlisle chuckles. "If anyone is strong enough, little one, it's you."

"No one falls in love in a week," she says, mostly to herself, shaking her head. "Carlisle, I don't know how to counter this. He refuses to think that this is the condition, and every time he gets closer to me, it's harder for me to pull away. I feel so drawn to him. I just … no one falls in love in a week."

"Bella, sweetheart," he says quietly, smiling despite himself. "It's ok to feel what you're feeling." He pats at her arm and reaches for her hand. "And maybe you're right. Maybe people can't fall in love in a week, but…I'm a doctor, and I've seen some things." Bella laughs as his voice hits a mysterious tone. "In all seriousness, Bella, what you're feeling, what he's feeling… it may not be love for you, or for him… but love starts somewhere. Maybe it's not love yet, maybe it will never be, but whatever you're feeling is most definitely not wrong."

Carlisle smiles at Bella, and kisses her forehead. "I know you're scared, and I know you're confused, but I have faith in you. We all know you'll make the right decision. We're here for you, Bella. No matter what you decide. We're not going to leave you to make that decision alone."

He squeezes her hand once more, then stands, looking down at her with a smile. "I'll leave you to your thoughts now, and whatever you decide, we'll understand and respect. When you're ready, come downstairs and join us. Edward should be out for a few hours after that pain medication, but use the crutches if you get up, young lady." He waggles his finger at her and winks, walking toward the door.

Bella lies back down, her hands resting above her head on the pillow. She inhales deeply and tries to decide on where to even begin.

"Oh Bella?" Carlisle says, pulling Bella from her thoughts. "I don't know if this helps, but… our family, well, we fall in love. The day I met Esme I knew it. Emmett and Rosalie, Jasper and Alice… Maybe it's something in the water, but… We fall hard. We fall fast," he pauses. "Sweetheart, we fall in love forever. Just. People may not fall in love in a week, but we do. I did, Esme did. It's in Edward's blood to fall in love." Carlisle smiles from the door, stepping out, hand on the doorknob. "If it truly is love, for him or for you, it's like I told you from the beginning, Bella Swan. You're family, and I'm sure I speak for everyone when I say Edward picked the right girl."

He leaves then, and when Bella's sure he's gone, she rolls over, head in the pillow and screams until her lungs give out. Screams and pounds her fists into the bed in frustration and downright confusion.

When she wakes up again, the room is significantly darker, and the setting sun, is casting ominous shadows over the dark furniture in Edward's room. She stirs, blinking to adjust to the darkness, and moves to roll over when she feels an arm tight around her waist. Upon further inspection, the arm is scratchy on her bare torso from the bandage, so Bella pulls down her tank top, covering her stomach and allows herself to lean back into Edward's warmth, just this once.

He tightens his hold, palm splayed flat on her abdomen, and pushes his leg through hers, wrapping around her ankle, effectively trapping her in his limbs.

"Edward," she whispers, running her fingers over the ridges of his knuckles, padding her fingers over his soft skin. "Edward, wake up."

He snuggles lightly into her hair, then groans, and Bella can feel him shake his head 'no'. He drums his fingers over her stomach from pinky to index to let her know he's awake, but doesn't move anything else.

"Edward, we have to talk," she says softly.

"I don't wanna," he whines. The inflection in his tone makes her turn her head back, catching his eyes, and that's when she realizes that this isn't exactly the same Edward from just a few hours ago. Edward Cullen's child-like counterpart is holding her close, not so much like a lover as Bella first thought, no. No, he's holding her like she's his security blanket.

"Edward, you and I need to discuss what happened today. Do you understand?"

"Yes, Bella," he replies sheepishly into the back of her neck, snuggling in closer to her, holding her tight.

"What you did wasn't good, Edward," she tells him, holding onto him. "You seriously jeopardized my stay here. I almost went home today." The last part is whispered, soft like a confession. "My head is screaming at me to go, telling me that I'm going to get hurt, but my heart is making me stay. I can't handle this, Edward. I can't handle you."

"What are you saying, Bella?" Edward asks, voice deep with concern, like Carlisle's was earlier. "Please don't leave me. You promised."

"Edward," she says, stuttering her breathes as he grasps her even tighter than before. "You don't understand. I'm just some girl. I wandered into a custodial closet on _accident_ and found you. I did what I knew was right. You don't love me. You love the idea of a savior."

"You're not just my savior," he says, lifting himself to hover over her, hands on either side of her head. "Bella, you may be my savior, but you're not _only_ my savior."

Bella's eyes close, refusing to look at him now, but his voice is different from before, different now.

"We fall fast," he whispers, dipping down to kiss her cheek, lips lingering there. "We fall hard."

Bella knows what he's going to say, even as his lips travel toward hers, leaving a trail of kisses up her jaw. "Bella, I'm not in love with a savior, I'm in love with a person. I won't pretend I'm not. It's against everything I am. I'm in love with a person, not an idea of one. I'm in love with _you_."

"Edward," she whispers, moving her face away from him. "Please, don't do this."

"We fall forever, conditions or not. I know who I want right now. When, or if this condition ever ends, I'll feel the same."

Bella shakes her head, "Edward, you can say that until you're blue in the face, but until you heal, and until you actually try to get better, I'll never know the truth."

Edward pauses for a moment, then nods, and pulls back. "After today, Isabella Swan, I will spend every minute trying to prove it to you. I'm going to speed through this recovery, get a clean bill of health, and sweep you off your feet."

"Edward, it's not about how fast you recover," she sighs. "It's about how thoroughly you recover. I don't care how long that takes."

"I don't want to lose you," he murmurs, leaning in again, lips hovering over her jawbone. "Bella, I'd do anything for you."

Raising her hand up, she rests it on his chest and pushes him up, off her and shakes her head. "That might be the problem, Edward. You can't just do it for me. You have to do it for you." She brushes her hand through his hair softly. "Get better for you, not for me or your family. You have to do it for you."

That night, Edward stays quiet. Bella thinks he's probably ashamed of himself after what he did earlier, in front of the family. She keeps him close, his hand tight in her own, and tries to interact enough for the both of them.

Alice keeps glancing at her worriedly, Bella knows it's because she's afraid that Bella's going to leave. When Alice starts cleaning the dessert dishes up, Bella leaves Edward on the couch and helps wash them.

"I'm not leaving, Alice," Bella tells her, taking a plate from the sink to dry. "I could never do that to Edward, or any of you, no matter how conflicted I feel."

"Oh Bella," Alice sighs, a wave of relief washing through Bella at her words. "I was so worried you were going to leave. When you said you couldn't do it anymore, I was so sad. You really are the best thing that's happened to Edward, with or without this silly road block." Alice puts down her dishtowel then, and all but attacks Bella, wrapping her arms under the crutches, around her waist. "I was so afraid you were too hurt to stay. I'll kill Edward myself if he scares you off."

Bella laughs, tightly holding to both Alice and her crutches, and giggles. "Alice, I'll die of suffocation first if you don't let up."

Alice immediately lets go, laughing. "So, what happened? I mean, I could probably guess by just the way you've looked at Edward all night, and by your eyes right now, but I'd like to hear all the mushy details." When Alice waggles her eyebrows at Bella, Bella practically snorts.

"Jesus, Alice, you're terrible."

"Details, you sexy thing," Alice says, eyebrows still dancing, a wicked grin on her face. She shoves her hands out, grabbing the air like a child grabs for an out-of-reach toy.

Just as Bella begins to blush, about to tell Alice to quiet down, Rosalie walks in with Edward at her side. Edward just looks awkward, and Rosalie's got fresh tears in her eyes.

"What happened?" Bella asks immediately, forgetting the previous conversation at once. "Is everything alright?"

"Edward and I talked," Rosalie says. "About what happened today. We-"

"I apologized for freaking out," Edward says, interrupting. "I didn't want her to think it was her fault that I'm the way I am."

"I apologized for treating you so poorly," Rosalie adds. "He knows we talked today."

"You apologized?" Bella asks curiously, looking at Edward proudly. He nods and Bella practically beams. "Really?"

"Yes," he says quietly. "I know you're afraid for me. I want to be better, Bella. I want to be better to prove to you that what I said wasn't just my condition. I want to try."

Both Alice and Rosalie look at Bella curiously.

"Edward…" Bella warns, eyeing him.

He doesn't continue out loud, just nods and smiles at Bella sweetly. He walks up to Bella, takes her hand and kisses her knuckles, humming a melody of a familiar song. Bella knows the song all too well, _My Own Volition. _

The way he's looking at her, Bella knows that Edward can tell she comprehends his message. How could she be a _Twilight_ fan and not know? _My Own Volition_ was the first song that played on MTV for the band. Parts of the song were statistically the most used phrases for tattoos in their musical genre for the last two years.

Bella also knows that Alice and Rosalie know the song. In fact, if she's not mistaken, Bella thinks that Alice and Rosalie both said _My Own Volition_ was in their top five _Twilight_ songs.

Edward is unfazed, pulling at Bella slightly, wary of her crutches, rocking her back with a slow dance, lips to her ear. Bella thinks she hears the sounds of feet leaving the kitchen, and assumes that Alice and Rosalie have taken Edward's not-so-subtle hint. Then Edward starts to sing softly in her ear. "_Hearts and hands and heads for see, everything you'll mean to me,_" he begins, lowering his voice for the next lyric, then takes a breath, exhaling against the shell of her ear, still dancing with her. "_You've chosen me, thankfully, and now it's time for me to tell everything you know so well._"

Knowing the song like she does, Bella anticipates the next lines of the song, and at any other time, would be drooling over this opportunity, but…

"_Bodies intertwined, limbs and lips, slowly as we thrust our hips,"_ his hips rock forward, slow, into her body, and she has to physically bite her lip to suppress the moan.

Smirking, he pulls her closer, bringing her body flush against his own with one hand flat on the small of her back, the other cupping her shoulder blade. He lets the crutches fall to the ground with a _clang_ and lifts her softly, making sure there is no pressure put on her leg. He sways them back and forth to the beat in her head.

"_What I feel for you I fear, will linger to the death my dear. I've chose you now, finally, and now for always, just you and me_."

His lips linger at the lobe of her ear, his tongue darting to flick at it as he breathes in. He kisses at the spot right behind her ear, and slowly pulls back, hands still holding her upright.

Edward dances with her for a while longer, until they're pulled out of their own little world by a sniffle from the entryway.

Edward looks up first, then Bella, only to find out that they were being watched by the rest of the family. Esme's got tears in her eyes, Carlisle's got a supportive hand on her shoulder. Jasper's holding Alice around the waist, hands on her hips, with her leaning her back to his chest. Rosalie is resting her head on Emmett's shoulder, his big arm wrapped around her shoulders, holding her to him.

"That was beautiful," Esme says first, smiling at Bella and Edward. Bella is mortified, cheeks flame red, biting her lip.

Still unfazed, Edward looks back at Bella and picks her up, putting her up onto the kitchen island. "I'm going to get better for me, Bella, but I'm going to recover for _you._" He makes sure she's steady on the countertop and reaches for her crutches, leaning them against the island before he turns back toward the living room, leaving the family to watch her sit there.

Bella's face is still crimson, but everyone disperses except for Alice and Rosalie, who come back into the kitchen instantly, both with unhinged jaws and wide eyes.

"Oh my _fucking_ God. You totally love him," Rosalie gasps.

Alice looks excited for a minute and then her face falls. "That's why you wanted to leave, right?" She asks quietly. "You think his feelings are a result of S-C?"

"You wanted to leave?" Rosalie asks, confused. "I thought you said you were staying?"

"Ladies? Excuse me for a moment."

All the girls look to the entrance of the kitchen. Carlisle's grin is humongous. "Bella? You should see this." Bella looks at him curiously, hops off the counter and grabs her crutches, walking back to the living room. She smiles wide, one single tear sliding down her cheek at the sight.

When Alice and Rosalie join Bella and Carlisle in the entryway, they both apply matching expressions to their faces, and Bella follows.

Edward is sitting with a guitar on his lap, strumming unfamiliar chords. Jasper is sitting off to the side with what looks like an acoustic bass, and Emmett is sitting on the couch with a drum pad and a tambourine.

Jasper and Edward are watching each other's fingers, playing chords and bouncing ideas off each other.

"This is how they write," Rose whispers to Bella. "He and Jasper find good sounds, Emmett waits it out, and then Edward writes."

"I don't know what you did, Bella, but this is definitely not a bad thing," Carlisle tells her, smiling. "Creative cognition is one of the best forms of therapy."

Bella shrugs. "This isn't my doing, Carlisle. This is all Edward."

"Fascinating."

They stay quietly in the doorway, staying out of the way as the boys practice, with Esme sitting Indian-style on the couch, grinning wide.

"What direction were you planning on this album?" Jasper asks Edward, still strumming.

"Haven't decided," Edward shrugs, switching to a minor key. "I want to do an acoustic album. With some of our old school songs redone, yeah?"

"We could do that," Emmett nods. "With those kind of albums, we can get away with staying off the road for a while longer. Acoustic albums will keep the fans happy while we recover."

"I wouldn't mind being on the road again," Edward says, still not looking up from his guitar.

For some reason, that sentence, for Bella, doesn't bring her good feelings. It sounds like Edward is making excuses for himself.

"Carlisle, should he be touring this soon?" Alice asks quietly, following Bella's train of thought.

"No, Tyler said he should take at least a year off," he answers, looking to Bella like she knows the answers.

"You're the doctor," Bella shrugs. "I'm just the girl who pulled him out of a supply closet."

"You, my dear, are much more that that, and you know it," Carlisle says. "Bu we should turn him off the idea of going out. He's just not ready."

"Who's not ready?"

Everyone turns to look over Carlisle's shoulder, only to see Edward standing their, guitar strapped to his back.

Bella crutches forward. "You. You're not ready."

"For what?" he asks, eyes on her alone.

"To tour," she says honestly. "You are not ready to go out, Edward. Baby steps, ok? No need to leap without looking."

"I want to get better," he argues. "Going out will help me."

"Edward, it took you a week to talk to your family. You haven't even been out of the house. Not to mention that you still have bandages on your wrists because you're constantly ruining them."

"It will be good for me," he says, crossing his arms over his chest.

"It might be, Edward, but I'm not letting you dive into an empty pool, sorry. I can only save you so much."

He stops then, quiet for a minute, and sighs. "Can I still write?" he asks, like he's compromising. Bella immediately nods.

"You can. You can write, you can play, paint, sing; whatever you want, as long as it's here. I have to heal too you know?"

"I know," he whispers to her, definitely ashamed now. "I just don't want you to leave. I want to be better."

"I know, and you know better than to think that I'm leaving," she smiles. "Now, go write a song and be creative with the boys. I'll come back when you need to go to sleep."

Edward nods, dances over to kiss her cheek, and pulls the guitar back around to his chest, thrumming the chords to _Apocalyptic Lover_. Bella's not sure if the song is actually directed toward her in this instance, or it's just a different song running through his head, but she doesn't care either way, and turns around smiling.

Edward, Jasper, and Emmett play for a while, nothing new, just old songs from the first few albums, just the music, not the lyrics.

Alice, Bella, and Rosalie stay in the kitchen, pretending to talk, but really not. More like just listening to their respective beaus. Bella tries not to consider Edward this way, not with the way he's been wishy-washy, but her heart really can't _not_ think like that when Edward strums a loud chord and sing-songs her name.

Esme and Carlisle adjourn to their room for a while, Carlisle only coming back down to remind Bella to meet in the study later.

The night crawls by with soft music and bright laughter, until Edward yawns and misses a fret.

"Bella," he calls into the quiet, his voice echoing off the walls of the living room and into the kitchen. "Can we go to bed now?"

She puts her coffee cup into the sink and crutches to the living room where the boys are waiting.

Edward stands, grinning mischievously, and before she can ask what's going on, she's off the ground, tightly held up by Emmett.

"Edward will get your crutches," Emmett says. "I didn't know you were this light until this afternoon," he laughs, loud and boisterous.

"Well, I'm glad you know now," Edward says. "Bella shouldn't be walking up and down those stairs."

Bella sighs as Emmett takes her upstairs, shaking her head. "Take me to my room, Em."

"What?" Emmett and Edward ask at the same time. Edward continues with, "Why are you going to your room? I can't fall asleep without you. I'm sorry, I didn't know this would make you mad. Please don't make me sleep alone."

"Pajamas, Edward, calm down. I just need some pajamas," she smiles at him. "I can change on my own, thank you very much."

Getting out of Emmett's arms, back on her crutches and into her room without Edward following her is an experience, but she laughs it off as she closes the door, him scratching and whining like a puppy. Eventually she hears him laugh, get up, and head down the hall toward his own room.

When she opens the drawer for pajamas, she's a little taken aback by what she sees. Not only is there a lot of lace, but there's a mass of silk, and, to her unfortunate surprise, her old ratty pajamas that she'd had in her bag are now mysteriously missing.

"Alice," she mutters under her breath. It takes a minute, but she digs through the drawer and eventually finds something mildly tame. There's a teeny tiny pair of shorts with a 'J' on the right butt cheek, which Bella knows (thanks to Angela) stands for Juicy. They're yellow and polka dot, but as she searches, there's no matching top, so she resorts to white cotton babydoll, happy to know that it doesn't show too much, and is long enough to cover her midsection.

Getting Edward to fall asleep tonight is easy. She lays with him for a bit, strokes her fingers through his hair. He's out like a light, and when she's sure, Bella leaves him alone and heads for the study, careful in the dark with her crutches.

She and Carlisle discuss the events of the day, from the dramatics of the afternoon to the bath, to the progress in the evening. Carlisle, much to Bella's disbelief, was very positive about everything.

"Remember Bella? I told you he'd have severe mood swings. His uncontrollable emotions are a major part of the healing process."

"You told me about the outbursts," she shakes her head. "You never aid anything about uncontrollable emotions." Now that she thinks about it, the two really go hand in hand, but in reality, everything she'd thought about Edward not really loving her… it could be true.

"Oh god," she says, eyes wide in realization. "He _is_ confusing love and gratitude."

"Bella, no." Carlisle shakes his head. "Anger to elation, depression to euphoria, that's what I'm talking about. Yes, Edward is grateful to you, we all are. And his production of feelings may be over zealous and unorthodox, but he is being honest. I don't think he's able to really lie to you, Bella."

"Maybe that's what I'm afraid of too, "she says. "That he'll _think_ he loves me for days and days and days and then one day, out of the blue, he'll figure out he _doesn't_ and tell me that it _was_ just gratitude."

Carlisle smiles sadly and Bella looks away. "Look, its crazy, I get it, but I've felt a pull to Edward Cullen just like every other girl in America. The day I picked up the first CD, I was just. I don't know, ok? I just, I don't want to fall in love with him."

"Sounds to me like you're trying to talk yourself out of something that's already happened," Carlisle's voice is soft and sympathetic. "You don't have to say it out loud, and you know I won't say anything, but Bella, sweetheart, it's in your eyes."

Bella nods, looking down to hide the blush, and yawns.

"Go to bed, little one, it's been a long day for all of us."

"That's an understatement if I've ever heard one," she laughs. "Today was catastrophic."

"Funny you say 'catastrophic'" Carlisle muses. "The song Edward, Jazz, and Em were working on was called _Perfection in Chaos_. Well, that's the working title anyway…"

Bella smiles, and then Carlisle laughs. "Wonder who that's about."

As Bella leaves that night, back up to Edward's room to rest, she lets herself think about what it would be like to love Edward Cullen.

-------------------------------------  
a/n: this project is kind of my baby. The term "Superman Complex" is completely my own fabricated diagnosis. I have no medical background, although, I'm asking a psych major if things do make sense. Many, many thanks to the-glory-days, as always, for kicking me in the ass every time I stop writing. Her story **In Another Life** just got updated. Check it out!

Updates will be few and far between, but because they're so much longer than my other chapter updates, I hope that's alright with you guys. So, few and far between tends to mean something like 'whenever I finish writing it. The reviews really help me write faster, so keep them coming.

**A question was brought up a few times, so I thought I'd address it here: **

**Ages – Bella, 24, Alice, 24, Rosalie, 25 Edward, 26, Jasper, 26, Emmett, 26. **

**Really though, the ages don't make much of a difference, if you think of them as a little older, that's fine. The main thing to understand is that Bella is taking on a lot for such a young age. Other than that, if you want Edward to be twenty-eight and Alice to be 22, sweet beans. :D**

Reviews are appreciated. I'd love to hear your feedback :]


	7. Chapter 7

Edward Cullen is a rock star in the biggest band of the decade. He's America's "It Boy," but he's still unhappy. Will Bella be in time to save him? AH AU

Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer created **Twilight**; I'm just toying around with her characters.

**Author's Note: Whoa, two plus months delay? I suck at life, so I finished writing it tonight.**

**NOT BETA'D. I just wanted to get it to you all as fast as possible! Hope you enjoy this part :D**

Superman Complex

--

After the outburst, Bella feels like the calm is just building. It's comparable, she thinks, to a lull between swells in the ocean, and everyday, she just waits for the next wave to crash.

It doesn't.

Everyday, Edward plays, either guitar or piano, slowly at first, and always with Bella. As the days go on, Bella notices that Edward is getting comfortable on his own when he plays. It's then that she leaves, gives him some alone time. The songs go from old _Twilight_ songs, from the older albums that Bella recognizes easily, to new melodies, unfamiliar sounds, phrases, words.

He's writing, and Bella's resting against the headboard of Edward's bed. She's typing another email to Angela, everyday, as promised. The song Edward's playing now, it's darker, mostly minor chords, eerie, like Halloween. She listens, but stays in his room as he plays from the music room with Emmett and Jasper.

It's only been a week since she arrived in Forks. One week, and already, Edward has learned the concept of personal space again. He's never too far away, just down the hall, but it's enough to know that Edward needs alone time, just like Bella does, and they respect each other's privacy.

Every night, Bella and Edward go to sleep, or Bella helps Edward fall asleep, and then she's up again, heading off to Carlisle's study to discuss the day, and Edward's progress.

Dr. Crowley, on the seventh day, sends an email reply to Carlisle for Bella, explaining how unprecedented this kind of recovery is. He explains to them the details of another case of "Superman Complex" and how it is _so absolutely _different than the recovery in Edward's case.

"It doesn't matter," Bella says, handing the email print out to Carlisle. "It doesn't matter how _quickly_ he recovers, Carlisle. He's not a test subject. The way Crowley speaks of him, it's almost like he's just a lab rat, some number." She sighs and shakes her head. "It's the _quality_ of his recovery. It might be good right now, calm, but he isn't talking to anyone. Well, that's not true, he's talking, acting normal, but he's not confiding in me. I think he's hiding."

Carlisle nods, like he understands, and tells Bella what she said is probably true. He adds, "I also think he's trying to shield you. From the ugly parts of this process of recovery."

Bella laughs at that. "Wait, ugly parts? Carlisle, he almost bled out while I carried him up two flights of stairs." Carlisle smiles at her comment and nods. "I know what you're saying, Carlisle. I get it, but it's just ridiculous."

"I agree, but to Edward, it might be his determining factor to recovering properly."

The rest of the powwow is just business, discussing some of the things that Edward has done repeatedly, some of the chords he's been playing a lot, some of the melodies, things like that.

That night, Bella crawls into bed, and curls into Edward's side, splaying her hand flat under his shirt on his stomach. Over the last six nights, and the nights in the hospital, Bella has come to realize that Edward sleeps more peacefully when she's closest. Even when she tries to pull away, she'll wake up in the middle of the night with his arms wrapped around her, legs twined together.

Bella's resistance against loving Edward is wavering dangerously close to extinction. Thinking about it, Bella comes up with two options;

_One, let him love you, fall in love with him, possibly get your heart broken_.

Or

Two, guard yourself for as long as it takes for him to recover, hide your feelings, and get your heart broken anyway.

It only takes a second to determine that the decision has already been made.

In the morning, Edward's eyes are on her when she wakes up, smiling down at her, one hand on her cheek, the other twirling her hair.

"I want to try something," he whispers, nervous. Bella looks up at him, eyebrow raised.

"What do you want to try, Edward? Are you feeling ok?"

"I feel fine. Amazing actually. I just. This morning, when I woke up, you. I want to wake up with you like this every day."

Bella doesn't even try to hide her blush this morning, just smiles at him and shrugs. "Well, I'm not going anywhere."

"I just. You're. Can I. I mean… I want to, uh," he pauses, sighing. "I'm just gonna…" and then his lips are on hers again, soft and perfect.

Bella kisses him back, and when Edward realizes it, suddenly, Bella's on her back and Edward's above her, kissing her passionately. She's seeing stars, or would if her eyes were open. One hand comes up, tight into her hair as she holds him in place above her, kissing him back with the same intensity of his kisses.

When he pulls back, he presses his forehead to hers, breathing deeply and murmurs, "I love you, Bella Swan," against her lips. On instinct, she begins to shake her head, but then stops herself.

"I think, well, I think I'm in love with you too," she says, eyes closed. "This _can't_ end well." The last part is mostly to herself, out loud.

"Who says it has to end at all? I love you. I love you with everything I am, I've told you that. Forever, Bella."

Bella looks up at him then, sees the sincerity in his eyes, and nods. "I know you mean it now, Edward. It's enough, for now it's enough."

Edward grins wide and presses his lips to hers again, softer, more patient than the last. She smiles against his lips and kisses him back.

_Day eight. _

_I've been here for less than eight full days, and I think maybe, possibly, I might have made the biggest mistake of my life. I really can't bring myself to care, how sad is that? God. _

_Over the week, I've been contemplating keeping a journal, as I've been told, but it wasn't until after I emailed "Marcie" that I figured I really __**should**__ be doing it. I should write down my feelings, because I sure as hell can't tell anyone else right now. Plus, it's doctor's orders._

_Right now, "Charlie Brown" is in the den with "Schroeder" and "Linus" talking about music and things I've generally learned to stay out of since meeting them._

"_Lucy" and "Sally" are cleaning up my room. The painters finished the walls two days ago, so they're dry enough to do some furniture rearranging. "Sally" is going absolutely nuts trying to rearrange my stuff. Even "Lucy" is getting frustrated now. :)_

_So, in other news, I don't know what to do with "Charlie Brown" yet. I mean, I know I'm setting myself up for heartache, but ever since that last outburst, he's been … I guess he's been pretending to be better. I think he's pretending. It's hard to tell, but I know he's hiding something. I know, with his condition, that I'm just setting myself to fall-and-fail but… it's "Charlie Brown", so who can say no to __**Charlie Brown**__?!_

_It's been calm for the last few days. "Marcie" has been asking too many questions, and sooner or later, I'm going to have to tell her about "Charlie Brown" but … I promised I wouldn't, so I don't know what I'm supposed to do. She knows I'm not the one-night-stand kind of girl._

_To be honest, I don't know what kind of girl I am anymore. This is the most __**unlike**__ me I've ever been. I've always been a shy, timid, conservative kind of girl, but recently, I just can't help but feel like I left my old life 1500 miles from here. _

_In one day, my life changed forever. I'm still not sure if it was a good decision or a bad one…_

_My mission, whether I choose to accept it, is to get "Charlie Brown" talking again. He needs to be honest with me, and until we get a __**real**__ dialogue going, there's nothing I can do._

_Until next time,_

_-Peppermint Patty_

"Bella, are you done emailing yet? Alice is driving me insane. Get your ass in here," Rosalie called through the open bathroom door. "What are you doing anyway? Writing a novel?"

"Something like that," Bella laughs. "No, just a journal, Carlisle's orders. Never got around to it until right now."

"Well, hurry up, Alice's good chi bullshit is driving me nuts."

"Hey!" Alice protests.

Bella laughs, shuts down the laptop and heads to the other bedroom to find it completely and utterly transformed.

"Alice? What. Uh?"

"Don't thank me," Alice grins wickedly. "It's amazing though, no?"

Bella nods. "Amazing is an understatement, Alice, Jesus."

"Well, we really couldn't have done anything until the movers finally got here. Shit, I mean, two days for packing, three for travel? We definitely won't be using them again, especially since they ruined half your stuff."

"Don't worry about that, Alice, it's fine."

Rosalie laughs. "I bet, you got a whole new-"

"And improved!" Alice interrupts, grinning.

"Wardrobe," Rosalie finishes, pushing Alice out of the way.

"And," Alice says, recovering from the shove. "You have good taste in furniture, especially that dark leather chair and foot rest in the corner, and the desk and chair set. They're perfect for the rest of the room, so I got rid of the old ones. They look amazing."

"Who looks amazing?"

Everyone turns to the door, where Edward is grinning wickedly, leaning against the frame in a way Bella can only describe as sexy.

"You're right," he says, walking into the room. "Bella does look amazing today."

"Alice bought it, it's nothing special," she shrugs. "Comfortable, and it stays out of the way of the walking brace, so…"

"Nothing special?" Alice says, almost hurt. "Bella, that designer piece is the antithesis of 'nothing special'. It is so fashion forward, it's ahead of the times, and. You just don't understand that you need to appreciate-"

"Alice," Rosalie stops her. "It's a jumpsuit, and yeah, it's cute. But she's grubbing around in _Forks_. It's not like we're in Beverly Hills. It would mean something there, or in Manhattan, or Milan, or Paris, not here in Podunk, Forks."

"Well, Edward's right, it does look amazing," Alice relents, shrugging her shoulders.

Edward walks closer, close enough that Bella can feel his breath on her forehead as the girls fight over fashion pieces that Bella cares nothing about. She can feel the heat from his body through his clothes. "Amazing yes, but it's kind of an underestimation, don't you think? I think you look divine." His words are soft, sweet on her skin, just for her. He pulls her closer, hands pulling at her pockets until they're flush against each other.

Unable to stop herself, Bella's right hand rests on his forearm, her left going to his bicep, holding him close. She doesn't even try to stop him from kissing her this time. She kisses back, despite being in a room full of people.

For a second, it's fine, Rosalie and Alice are still talking fashion, just backroom noise to their kisses, and then it's quiet, silent. Bella pulls back as Alice starts to giggle, and mutters, "Shit," under her breath.

"Whoa there, Edward," Emmett laughs. "Let the girl breathe."

Ignoring him, Edward leans back in, this time, with his hands on her cheeks, and kisses her again, softer this time, chaste.

"Edward," Bella says, pulling away again. "Enough."

Edward looks hurt when he lets her go. "But, Bella, I thought you said-"

She cuts him off. "I said I was falling in love with you, Edward. Not that it was a good idea to pursue it. That doesn't mean you can kiss me like that all the time."

"What _does_ it mean then?" he asks, less hurt now, more confused.

"I don't know," she whispers. "I . God. I can ruin _everything_ for you, Edward. Don't you understand?"

Alice coughs, clearing her throat, and Bella turns her back, facing away from Edward.

"If it makes any difference," Alice says. "I think you're perfect for him. I also think that there's no way you can ruin anything. He's only getting better, even Carlisle thinks so."

"What if something happens? I mean, ever since the last outburst, Edward hasn't said a word about it." Looking away, she wipes a tear off her face and looks at Edward. "You're shielding me. From _what_, I don't know, because it sure as hell can't be worse than pulling you out of a janitorial closet, Edward." She blinks, willing the tears away. "If I get involved with you. _If_ I do, you can't try to hide things from me. I can't help you if you hide away."

"Oh honey," Rosalie sighs, smiling sadly. "You can't deny it… you've been involved since the beginning."

"Stay out of it, Rosie," Emmett tells her.

Jasper does the same, pulling Alice to the door, "Alice, come on, let's let them talk."

When the door closes behind the four, Bella sighs, leaning against the dresser behind her.

"I don't want you to stop liking me," he admits slowly. "If you leave me. I-"

"You'll survive, Edward. I don't plan on leaving, but if I do, you will survive. I have to know you'll be ok."

"I won't be," Edward says. "No. Stop talking like this. Bella, you can't leave me. I need you," he pleads, walking close to her, hands back on her hips. "Please don't leave me."

Bella sighs, smiling softly. "There you are," she says, bringing her hand up to his cheek, cupping it with her palm. "Why were you hiding from me, Edward? You don't have to pretend with me. If you're scared, tell me. Don't pretend to be normal in front of me. I'm here for _you_."

"Please, I'm sorry. Don't… I just," he pauses, lowering his head to her shoulder. "I thought if I acted normal, if I was normal you wouldn't leave. I. God, please don't leave me now."

"Edward, stop. Please. I'm not leaving, ok? Not until you tell me to." She shrugs, thinking about how that won't be enough to get her to leave.

"I'm scared all the time, Bella. That you'll leave, that I'll try to… that I'll try to kill myself again. I'm terrified that if I don't get better I'll let everyone down. It's. I," Edward frantically spits out. "I think about how no one with S-C gets better, not all the way. I. I don't want to. I."

Bella stops him there, bringing her other hand to his face. "Hey, hey, look at me."

"You don't understand," he tells her. "Dammit, you just don't get it!" He pulls away from her sharply. Bella waits, thinks maybe this is that crashing wave she's been waiting for.

He stalks away, toward her bed and stands with his back to her, heaving. In a flash, he turns; eyes coal black, just like the last outburst. Bella stiffens.

"I don't _want_ to get better, god damn you!" He yells, fists at his sides as he walks to her. "I don't want to get better because I don't want to stop loving you! You. You're just. Just some _girl_. Some insignificant, ordinary girl, and now, fuck Bella, I'm head over fucking heels for you, and I don't want it to ever stop."

Eyes still dark; Edward puts his hands on either side of her, his fists on the dresser, pushing his hips to hers, hard into the wooden dresser behind them.

"What have you done to me?" He asks harshly, voice low and gravelly. "You've done something. I don't get it. I was fine, I was happy, and then _you_-" Bella brings her hand up and slaps him, hard and crisp across the cheek, effectively stopping his screaming.

"I saved your god damned life, Edward Cullen," Bella hisses. "And if you were so fucking happy, why'd you try to off yourself, huh? Cat got your tongue, Eddie?" She asks sarcastically.

"Shut up!" He shouts, banging his fists on the dresser. "Shut up! Shut up!"

Bella pushes him, hard enough to get away from his grasp. "Do you remember all that blood, Edward? The blood that _poured_ out of your fucking wrists? Out of my arm when you turned the box cutter on me? Do you remember how hard it was for me to carry you out of that stupid little closet?" Voice tight, shaking, Bella wields the barely-there scar on her forearm, pointing to the still-braced knee with the other hand. "The way you almost gave up on me? How I had to rip off my fucking shirt to stop the blood flow at your wrists? Do you? Do you Edward?"

"Bella, enough."

Whipping around, Bella sees Carlisle standing tall in the doorframe. "He's had enough."

Bella turns back to Edward, regret and guilt betraying her anger. "Oh god, Edward, I'm so sorry."

Edward's eyes aren't black anymore, no; now, when Bella looks at him, his eyes are back to beautiful, innocent emerald green, glassy from his unshed tears.

Carlisle nods in understanding, holding his hand out for her to come to him. "It's alright, dear. It's ok. It's obvious that Edward said some things he didn't mean, just as it is that you didn't mean what you said either."

Edward, still looking shell-shocked, shakes his head. "She meant it. I know she meant it, and I don't blame her. She's. She's telling me the truth. I know that."

He walks toward the two of them, toward Bella and Carlisle and tentatively puts his hand out, cupping her elbow. "I've never thought of you as ordinary, or insignificant, Bella, I apologize." He blinks slowly, once, then again, and Bella watches as he backs away, toward the bathroom.

"Edward, please, wait," Bella whispers. "I didn't. I. I was so angry with you, I saw red, Edward and I couldn't stop."

She watches as he keeps walking toward the bathroom, toward his own room, and crumbles against Carlisle as Edward closes the connecting door for them. She cries against him for a minute, holding onto him, and then shakes her head. "I'm going to ruin everything," she whispers. "Just being here, I. He had another outburst and I pushed too hard. I can't do this, Carlisle."

Carlisle laughs fondly and shakes his head. "You're doing it, Bella. Your reaction was completely understandable, and, if I do say so, beneficial for him. He regrets the outburst, you can see it, and now he knows better than to bottle it up. This won't be the last, but he knows better now."

"How can you say that?" Bella asks, stepping back from him. "Carlisle, I pushed too hard."

"You pushed," Carlisle shrugs. "You pushed just enough to make him realize that what he said can't be tolerated, and I see nothing wrong with that. I wanted to come in here and stop him the moment he started screaming, and when he called you ordinary, Esme just about growled. No, Bella, if anything, you handled this much better than the rest of us."

"He's afraid that he won't get better," she admits. "He knows the odds, about the fact that no one documented has recovered completely, and he's afraid he'll always be like this."

"Not one of those documented cases had someone like you," Carlisle says, looking down at her, catching her eye. He winks, and then grins. "You're our secret weapon, Isabella Swan, and don't you forget it."

Bella laughs, sighing, and lets Carlisle go back to the others. "Tell them we're alright, and after I talk to Edward, that we'll be down for lunch, ok?"

He mock-salutes and turns, leaving the room and closing the door behind him. When she's sure he's gone down the stairs, taking the others with him, Bella walks through the bathroom door and finds Edward in his bedroom, lying on his bed, eyes closed and wet.

"Edward," she whispers, walking up to the bed and crawling in next to him, sharing the pillow with him. "I'm sorry for how I reacted back there. I know what I said was harsh, and there was probably a better way to tell you all of that, but. I don't know it was just. I was mad at you, Edward. So, so mad, and I'm sorry."

His eyes flutter open, inches from her own, and she smiles, bringing her hand up to brush his hair off of his forehead. "Don't worry, Edward," she murmurs. "We're going to get through this, and you're going to get better."

He sighs, leaning forward to rest his forehead against hers. She runs her thumbs under his eyes and wipes away the tears. He bites the corner of his lip, and then takes a deep breath. "What if. What if when I get better, I don't feel the same way about you?"

_I'm afraid of that too_, she thinks. "If that happens, Edward, _if_ it happens, you and I will always be friends. I'll be there to watch you fall in love for real, and be front row when you marry her and start a family," she laughs sadly. "I won't resent you for coming to your senses, Edward. If that's what's meant to happen, then that's what's meant to happen."

"I don't want to fall out of love with you," he mutters.

"Then don't," she shrugs her shoulders. "Right now, let's just be happy and in love and careful. If that day comes where you don't feel what you feel for me today, tell me, and we'll deal with it together. No more secrets."

"No more secrets," he repeats, nodding.

Then Bella does something she hasn't done yet. She kisses him first, softly at first, just brushing her lips against his. It escalates quickly, both using the kiss to admit their fears, to confess their worries, to promise. Breathless, Bella pulls back first, panting, and then brushes her fingers through his unruly hair.

"Come on, your mother has lunch for us."

"Are they upset with me?" he asks quietly, reaching to grab for her hand when she stands. "Because of what I said to you?"

"What I said to you was a thousand times worse than what you said to me," she laughs. "If they're mad at anyone, it's me."

"I'm starting to think that they love you more than me," Edward groans, rolling his eyes as he walks with her. Bella just grins, wide and proud, and shrugs her shoulders. "Come, lead the way," she says, pulling him down the stairs. "I'll even let you give me a piggy back ride if you stop moping."

He instantly perks up. "Really? Do you really mean it, Bella?"

"Yes, really," she winks, hands up. "Ready for lunch?"

"Yes!" He says jovially, leaning down to pick Bella up to lead her down the stairs. When they get into the kitchen, everyone is silent for a moment, only Carlisle looks up to acknowledge their presence. Bella and Edward sit quietly and throughout lunch, everyone succumbs to the awkward silence that's fallen over the table. It's almost as if they're all afraid that Edward is going to explode again. Finally, Bella can't take it anymore. She puts her fork down loudly, clears her throat, and says, "Everyone needs to stop staring. Edward is fine, god damn it. You all know that the outbursts were coming, this should not be surprising."

Alice's eyes dance with amusement, as do Emmett's. Rosalie smiles apologetically, and then looks away. Jasper winks at Bella, a smile on his face, while Carlisle looks at Bella with she believes is encouragement.

Edward just smiles at her, grabs her hand above the table and holds it tightly. Bella instantly calms, grabbing for her fork again to resume eating.

Emmett breaks the silence not ten seconds later, waggling his eyebrows. "So… when is the wedding?" His cheery grin mocking Bella with an older brother type of teasing.

"Right after your funeral," Bella replies cheekily, easily. "So… tomorrow?"

Emmett erupts with loud, boisterous laughter and stands up to high-five her. "Very nice, Jellybean, very nice. Edward, I approve."

Grinning, Bella, along with the rest of the table continue to eat the meal with ease, lazy smiles and idle chatter between them. Jasper, Emmett, and Rosalie clear off the table as soon as they're finished, and when they're gone, Esme scoots her chair over to sit next to Bella."

"The paint on the walls should be dry enough for your project, Bella," Esme tells her, pulling out her laptop from seemingly nowhere. Bella groans playfully, just as Alice comes to sit down on the opposite side of Edward.

"With this program, Alice has taken photos of the room, the walls, the furniture and things, and when we upload them, we mark the dimensions and it gives us a topical view of your room, and better access to wall designs, see?"

Esme types at the keyboard quickly and the room shows up with all the furniture logged. With another quick keystroke, Esme pulls up the wall.

"This is the wall as it is now, and with the program, we can put in the design ideas to see how it'll turn out."

Bella nods, looking at the screen. "Edward, do you have any song ideas? I was thinking maybe "Apocalyptic Love", what do you think?"

Edward smiles, nodding, and Bella thinks he's probably thinking back to the kitchen counter when he was getting the ice for her. "You mean '_Let me be the one to hold you down when all your world crashes at your feet_. _Let me hold you now, let me hear that heart beat.'_"

"Actually, I was thinking more of the piano solo after that verse," Bella says, blushing. "After the line '_This purgatory silence is deafening, too loud for my ears, please tell me what's wrong so I can help quell your fears_.'"

Bella looks at the screen, then to Esme. "Can we get five staff lines evenly spread over the wall? From one end to the other?"

Esme types something in, and the sets of five lines show up easily in a vibrant black, to contrast the muted sage wall.

"Do you think we could take a snap shot of the music notes from Edward's software and super impose them in this?"

Esme looks from Alice to Edward obviously unsure. Edward looks at the screen and then up at Bella, nodding. "I don't see why not, I'll be right back."

He leaves quickly, kissing Bella's hand as he goes to email a screenshot to Esme from his computer upstairs. Bella waits for the email, Alice and Esme discuss other options for the room with her.

"We could get art to hang, if the project doesn't turn out the way you like," Alice suggests. "When Jazz and I go to Los Angeles next week, I can go to my friend's gallery to pick up a few pieces."

Bella looks up suddenly, away from the screen. "You're going to California?"

"Well yeah, silly. I do have a job you know? I took off as much time as possible, but one of my clients just can't be rearranged. I'll be back that next week, which means you better be ready for new clothes."

Groaning, Bella rolls her eyes and looks down at the computer, in obvious disregard. "I want to use a matte paint for the black staffs and notes, and then coat them with a clear coat to make them stand out against the sage. Real precise clear coating, you know?"

Esme grins, looking pleased. "I wish you would let me help, you're seriously speaking my language with this project, Isabella Swan."

Bella laughs and jokes with Esme and Alice until the laptop chirps with a new message. "It's weird, thinking about how Edward Cullen of _Twilight_ has an email address like a normal person. I guess I'm still star struck, but… it's odd, thinking about how he's just a normal guy."

Esme laughs. "His email is mamasboy610[at]gmail[dot]com. Who in their right mind would guess that that is Edward's email address?"

"Mama's boy?" Bella asks. "You're kidding."

"Afraid not. Six-ten is my birthday, and when _Twilight_ got big, his EdwardCullen[at]gmail[dot]com email address got flooded with fan mail.

Edward comes back, smiling easily at Bella, then Esme.

"Thank you, baby," Esme whispers, grinning wide at her son.

Bella knows that Edward is trying, and lately, he's been so good, his smile at Esme proves that he's actually making an effort to get better. "Is the photo alright?"

"The photo is perfect," Esme says, winking.

Watching as Esme uploads the photo into the program, Bella's hand finds Edward's and tangles her fingers with his, waiting until the program responds and shows them the results. Esme turns the laptop toward them and says, "How's this? If you like it, we can get started tomorrow."

Bella looks from the screen to Edward, and when he looks at her, she smiles and rests her head on his shoulder. "It's perfect, Esme. I can't wait."

-------------------------------------

a/n: this project is kind of my baby. The term "Superman Complex" is used for my own fabricated diagnosis. I have no medical background, although, I'm asking a psych major if things do make sense. Many, many thanks to **­­**_**the­-glory-days**_, as always, for kicking me in the ass every time I stop writing. Updates will be few and far between, but because they're so much longer than my other chapter updates, I hope that's alright with you guys.

**Reviews are appreciated. I'd love to hear your feedback :]**


	8. Chapter 8

Edward Cullen is a rock star in the biggest band of the decade. He's America's "It Boy," but he's still unhappy. Will Bella be in time to save him? AH AU

Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer created **Twilight**; I'm just toying around with her characters.

Author's Note: Sorry I suck. I lost my flash drives and everything was gone. Thanks to **the-glory-days** for having a copy. Ilybb

----

Three weeks, six days.

Bella finds herself still in awe, confused, and unsure in Forks three weeks and six days after meeting Edward Cullen of _Twilight_ in a janitorial closet in Arizona. She's learned a few things over her stay, first and foremost being that as soon as Edward seems to be making any kind of progress, he'll do something heinous to revert back to day one.

The day of the room painting, Bella and Edward quickly lay down plastic over the furniture, pulling it to the middle of the room, and lay plastic all along the floor to avoid repeating Edward's childhood mistake. He stirs the paint, makes sure it's distributed in the buckets, and as Bella inspects, she sees that the paint is the perfect black.

"It's going to be amazing, Edward," Bella smiles, dipping her paint brush in the onyx color, taking it over to her step ladder to get the highest staff lines first. "Not too much paint on the brush, ok?"

She's noticed, since last night, that he's been so quiet, and she'd be afraid that he was reverting back to his old "I don't talk about my feelings" Edward, except that he'd whispered his fears to her last night as she let him rest his head on her chest, to feel her heart beat.

Obviously, she realizes that Rome wasn't built in a day, and that Edward can't be fixed in one either, so she tries to stay understanding and also tries to talk for the two of them.

The first staff lines, notes, accidentals, and time signatures are completed without interference. The house is quiet, with the exception of Bella's iHome, the speakers pouring out a soft, relaxing playlist to keep them focused. Soon though, as it nears lunch time, Bella's arms begin to spasm, holding her hands so high above her head for such a long time, so she plops her paint brush back down into the rectangle box and exhales, running the back of her hand over her forehead.

A knock at the door makes Bella jump, and unfortunately, lose her footing, and as Esme walks in, Bella, like her paint brush, finds herself plopped down into the excess paint bucket.

For a brief second, everyone is quiet. Edward's jaw is slacked, Esme looks worried, and Bella's cheeks flare up ruby red with embarrassment. "Oh, Bella, sweetheart, are you alright?"

At Esme's kind and concerned words, Bella looks up, lips pursed to contain her giggles, and nods, easily losing control and laughing boisterously over the soft music. Edward, immediately moves to her side and pulls her out of the bucket at Bella's insistence and helps her inspect the damage.

"Esme, Alice is going to skin me," Bella gasps, breathless from laughter. Looking down, Bella's once pink jumpsuit with JUICY on the behind is now dripping black paint down her legs.

"Alice will get over it," Edward says, reaching to pull his old high school t-shirt off to help Bella wipe off the cold matte paint.

"If it makes a difference, the room looks amazing," Esme smiles. "And its lunch time, so, once you get changed, put that outfit in the bathtub with cool water, I'll come up after we all eat and see what I can do about it. I mean, probably nothing, but we'll see what I can do."

Bella nods, wiping at the backs of her thighs with the shirt. Esme lets herself out, and Edward walks back to his room.

"Here," he says when he comes back. "Wear these. They're old gym clothes, you can paint in those."

Escorting herself to the bathroom, she sees that the apple of her cheeks are still tinged pink, but she appreciates the fact that this time, it isn't so much from embarrassment as it is from joviality.

She carefully removes the Juicy Couture clothes and slips into Edward's gym shorts and wife beater, doing as Esme suggested and leaving the suit in the bathtub with cold water.

Lunch is quiet, not awkward, just quiet with contentedness. Esme's made a cold chicken salad with soft noodles and crunchy celery and it's light enough to keep them from becoming sloths, but heavy enough for them to have enough energy to continue through their painting excursion.

After the plates are cleared by Bella and Edward (at Bella's insistence), Esme begs to be able to help them finish. Bella relents and lets Esme help finish the upper staffs as Bella begins on the lower ones.

By nightfall, the room's accent wall is complete with the first coat of paint. Tomorrow, the clear coat will cover the black with shine, and after that, Bella's room will be complete. As she helps clean out the brushes that night, Bella realizes just how serious that is. The Cullen family has cleared a space for her, a full room, just for her, so that she feels as if she belongs.

After clean up, a quick stir fry dinner, and some light conversation, the boys take off upstairs to write, or play, or practice, or whatever, and when the first bits of guitar start to permeate through the walls, Bella recognizes the opening chords to "Absolute Sunset" off of their first EP. She takes a deep breath, tries to find a deeper meaning in Edward's choice of practice songs, and then stops herself.

Carlisle, Bella assumes, can see her internal struggle, but grins easily, and pats her on the shoulder as he leaves the den to go to his study. "Bella, he will tell you, don't doubt him."

Bella smiles softly at Edward's father, but stops him before he goes upstairs. "Did you hear anything back from Dr. Crowley?"

"Since the last correspondence, no," Carlisle says. "I had a few choice words about him treating my son and his girlfriend as lab rats," he winks, gripping the banister on his ascent. "I'm sure I won't hear from him until I send him a progress report. You'll be the first to know."

Bella groans, but as he walks away, she opens up her laptop to check her email and journal about the day. She logs into her email, sees that Angela is online, and starts up a direct chat, instead of sending one bulk email.

**Isabella:** Hello!!!!!**  
Angela: ** Bella! OMG, how are you? How do you like NorPac WA?**  
Isabella:** Could be worse, ;], just finished painting the first coat in the room. Pretty excited about it.**  
Angela: **Not that I'm not extremely interested in your … paint, but when are you going to tell me about the man candy? I know you, B. What's going on?**  
Isabella: **It's hard to explain, Ang, trust me, if I knew the words, I'd type them, but it's like… I really want to be with him, and I want it to work, and right now, I've got my fingers crossed so that I don't jinx myself.**  
Angela: **Sounds serious, B…. you sure you're not in mob trouble or something?**  
Isabella: **LOL. Angela, we talked about this, did we not? Come _on_, I'm not involved with the mob :P**  
Angela: **I'm just looking out for my BFF, ok?  
**Isabella:** Alright, alright. So… what else is new? How's Ben? Did you hear anything from Mike about me quitting the job sans notice?**  
Angela: ** Actually yes. And Ben's great. Mike called Jessica, who called Bree, who called Lauren who asked Heidi to talk to your mother. Or something, shit, I don't know how the phone tree branched. Anyway, so Heidi called your mom, and your mom told her to tell Mike that you eloped with a Frenchmen named Jacques or something.  
**Isabella:** Oh god. She didn't.**  
Angela: **Oh she did… so what does Heidi do?  
**Isabella: **Tells Lauren to tell Bree to tell Jessica to rub it in Mike's face?  
**Angela: **Exactamundo, mi amiga. Mike ran into me in Starbucks – thanks a lot for ditching me, btw, he finds me everywhere – and asked me if it was true.  
** Isabella: **And what did you say?  
**Angela: **I said yes, and that I got an email from you the day before saying you were two months pregnant.  
**Isabella:** ANGELA!!! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU!! :[**  
Angela: ** Well? How else could I get back at you for ditching me in dry as fuck Phoenix? I mean, I don't even have your address, B. Your cell phone is NEVER on, trust me, I check BBM tyvm, you never get my messages. Always a 'D' never an 'R'**  
Isabella:** … I know, Ang, and I'm sorry. It's just that… Just that the whole thing is so fast. As soon as I get my mail situation set up, I'll give you my address, ok?  
**Angela: **I'm not mad, Bells. I just miss my BFF and would rather see her face than see her name on my IM screen, you know?  
**Isabella: **I love you Angie, I promise I'll explain when I can, but I have to go, ok?  
**Angela: **you're deflecting, Swan. You keep forgetting that I ~know you. Can you call me tomorrow, so I can have a verbal dialogue with my best friend cum sister cum ex-roommate?  
**Isabella: **LOL. Yes, mother.  
**Angela: **I'm just looking out for you, so be nice, bitch.  
**Isabella: **Love you Angie. I'll ttysoon.  
**Angela: **byee!!!

Bella signs out of chat after she actually checks her email, writing back her mom a one liner, briefly explaining the moving truck dilemma and then goes to her journal to write.

_Day nine._

_Painting with "Charlie Brown" was fun today. I fell in some paint, but generally, I think the day was a success. "Charlie Brown" gave me some old gym clothes to wear, and I feel like such a teenager thinking about the implications of this. Tell me I'm ridiculous, I can handle it._

… _I think._

_Anyway, while "Charlie Brown" has been quiet, I'm not too worried about what I mentioned before. "Charlie Brown" and I had a weird confrontation about the issue, and thankfully, all was resolved. I think "Sally" and "Lucy" got scared, but then, I think "Sally" was madder at me for not recognizing the importance of a jumpsuit than for the heated dialogue. _

_Speaking of which, I completely ruined one today. A jumpsuit I mean. "Sally" told me it was perfect to paint in because it wouldn't get in the way. I don't need an article of clothing to get in my way for it to turn out disastrous. I tripped over my own feet and fell into the paint bucket._

"_Charlie Brown" is practicing right now, an old song, and while I don't exactly understand WHY, I'm going to let him come to me. I think that will be the best._

_That's all for now._

_Until next time,_

_Peppermint Patty._

Bella exhales softly as she finishes up her document and posts it, making sure she shuts down her laptop before she walks from the den up to the practice room. Knocking, she waits for a bit until Jasper opens the door and lets her in, telling her to sit wherever.

Edward looks up at her and smiles, beams, and winks as he strums the chords to "Recumbent Calm". Emmett starts to keep time with his foot, drum pad on his lap, sticks at the ready as Jasper comes in on acoustic bass. As they begin to come together, Bella takes a deep breath and waits for Edward's sweet, velvety voice to sing the passionate words to _Twilight's_ number one love song. She's not disappointed when he does, his eyes closing as Bella watches.

"When the wind blows, slight, a gasp from strawberry lips, your eyes shine bright, nova," he sings softly, the guitar fading as his vocals carry the harmony. "Smile to reach your apple cheeks, fragrant rubies dress them sweetly. Love, you're happy here."

The bass comes back slowly, a crescendo builds from piano to mezzo forte as Edward sings a sweet chorus of a lover's dance. The guitar picks up, Edward's fingers picking at the strings, and then the music decrescendos down to a soft piano and Edward sings again, softly, like a whisper.

"Simple lavender laughter dances meekly, soft, a whisper behind your new moon orbs. Listen," he says the last word louder, only to soften once more. "Listen, happy Eros, your adoration flows, peaceful, fleeting. Molasses time holds no one back. No one, not you. Your cherry blush, perfection."

Again there's a rise and fall in the music as the chorus dances and then the music fades down to Emmett's strong foot keeping time, and then nothing.

Bella opens her eyes after the silence continues for a while, not sure at what point she closed them, and looks to see all three of them staring at her. She realizes, as they stare, that she's got this huge goofy grin on her face, cheeks hot with embarrassment at being caught in that state. She shrugs, catching all of their glances and waits.

Emmett laughs first, and pushes at Edward's shoulder. "I wish girls looked at me like that," he says, waggling his eyebrows.

Edward pushes him back. "Rosalie looks at you like that all the time."

"Question is, what has Bella all gaga over that song?" Jasper says, his own smile wide on his cheeks.

"I think the question should be, who was the song written for," Bella decides, looking between the three of them. "I know all of you write, and I'm pretty sure the second album was way more collaborative lyrically than the last three."

"And you would know, would you?" Emmett says, looking between Jasper and Edward.

"Well? Who was it written for?"

Edward answers with apparent ease after the other two refuse answers. "You."

"What? I didn't know you five years ago. I didn't even know me five years ago," Bella laughs, the blush on her cheeks again.

"_Molasses time holds no one, not you, your cherry blush perfection,"_ Edward sings, winking at her. "I wrote this one, about my dream girl when I was nineteen years old. Every aspect of it, of _her_, I find in you now. Flushed cheeks, bright eyes, strawberry lips, lavender laughter… the song is you in lyrical form."

Emmett and Jasper scoff, rolling their eyes, but Bella just stares, enamored more now than ever. "God, are you fucking real?" she asks, pinching herself. "Maybe I'm dreaming all of this."

The three of them laugh at her, but she just smiles anyway and sighs. "When Angela and I were in high school, our senior year, I had this album; it was our favorite song. We always wrote little stories about white knights coming to save the maiden, and it was always to that song." Her eyes falter for a second, her smile quivering as she thinks about Angela and their friendship.

"Jellybean?" Emmett asks quietly, putting his drumsticks and pad down. Bella watches as the three of them stare at her with odd expressions.

"I'm good, sorry," Bella smiles. "Anyway, I love this song almost as much as I love "Apocalyptic Love". She stands from the stool and stretches her hands up over her head and yawns.

"I'm going to go to sleep, ok?" She tells Edward. "It's been a long day, and I'm exhausted. Wake me up when you come in."

"No, I'll come with you," Edward says, automatically standing up.

"No, no, stay, if you're comfortable writing and playing, I _want_ that for you. I'll just be down the hall. Maybe I'll take a bath."

Edward's cheeks blossom with pink this time, and Bella knows exactly where his mind went. "I'm pretty sure I still have black paint on my ass," she adds in, lifting the baggy short-leg up and toeing the ground to look behind at the backs of her legs. "I mean, I wouldn't be surprised."

Edward exhales loudly, and then when Bella catches his eye, she winks and heads away, closing the door as she hears Emmett and Jasper cat calling and whistling.

She knocks on Alice's door, waits, and yawns again. When Alice finally answers, dressed in silky pajama shorts and a cotton tank, Bella asks, "When are you going to LA again?"

"Two days, why?" Alice asks, tilting her head to the side.

"When will you be going back?"

"Probably next month, Bella, what is this?"

"Well, it's just. My best friend, Angie, she does business in LA and New York City a lot, and well. It's just. I want to see her so bad. When I left, I didn't say goodbye, and we talked today, and it's just-"

"What do you mean, you talked today?" Alice asks again, and Bella knows where that train of thought is going.

"Gag order, remember? I won't say anything like that. I just miss her is all. And if I could go down with you and Jasper, when Edward's doing a little better, I mean, I could go to lunch or something, and you three can stay back at the hotel."

Alice shrugs. "My best friend's name was Victoria. Before I met Jasper, she and I were total fans, you know?" She pulls Bella inside and flops down on the bed, banging on the wall by the headboard.

Before Alice can continue, Rosalie comes in, dressed in Emmett's old football jersey, and lies down next to Alice. Bella makes herself comfortable with the two of them and says, "So what, are we gonna girl talk now?"

Alice grins wide. "Exactly. So, like I was saying, Victoria and I used to be best friends, and we used to go to shows all the time together. Then one day, while she was out of town on business, I got an invite from a client of mine to go to the after party for a _Twilight_ show. Vicky was pissed, and told me if I was as good a friend as I said I was, that I would decline the invite.

"Obviously, I didn't. When Jasper and I started seeing each other, Victoria, still mad, started pretending to be my best friend again, so I thought we were ok. I was so happy, and then one day, I come back to the hotel where all the guys are staying, in Oregon mind you, in February, and she's walking around in a bikini in front of the boys and all the roadies." Alice's disgust is clear to Bella, who's also rolling her eyes.

"So I confront her, and she has the nerve to tell me that I'm just a groupie, and that the guys- Jasper included- actually don't like me. I knew she was using me. I was so upset that after Oregon, I stopped following the guys on tour, even though Jasper wanted me there, because _she_ was there. She started dating their sound tech, James, and was always walking around and sleeping with people behind his back. I was so disgusted with her. I mean, we talked about the skanky groupie girls all the time, and then my best friend became one. I don't know. It was heartbreaking. After that, _Twilight_ got a new sound tech, and Victoria stopped touring. Sometimes I miss our friendship, but it's like… it wasn't real if she gave up so easily."

Bella cocks her head to the side and bites her lip. "Angie isn't like that," she whispers. "I'm sorry Victoria was, but… Angela. She's so. Wise beyond her years, sweet, compassionate. I trust her with every single thought in my head."

"I didn't mean to imply that the two were in any way similar, I was just trying to commiserate missing a best friend," Alice says sadly. "Until Rose, and now you, I've been without a best friend. Rosie too, huh?"

Rose sighs, looks at Alice menacingly. "I hate this girl babble bull shit, Ali, and you know it." Alice pouts a little, and as Bella watches the two of them, she sees Rosalie fold and take a deep breath. "My best girlfriend was Tanya. Tanya was a bitch, just like me; we got along. I met Emmett at a bar in the city, started seeing him exclusively, you know? I gushed like a little fucking teenager to Tanya about how much of a sweetheart he was, and how hot and sexy he was, even though he and I hadn't fucked yet, and then one day, I get home from work, and Tanya's straddling him. Bitch was about to get cut, but Emmett just grimaced and picked her up with his hot muscles and put her down on the couch, pulling me outside with him.

"Emmett and I talked that night, he called some movers and they packed all my shit. I haven't talked to her since, but I heard her sisters and her got into some nasty shit with child porn. Something about their mom. You're lucky if your friend's as genuine as you think she is," Rosalie smiles sadly. "That camaraderie is hard to get back once you lose it."

Bella sighs. "Angela and I have been friends since we were like two, I miss that girl so fucking much. The last time we'd been away from each other for more than a week was when she went with her boyfriend, Ben, to a cabin for winter break."

Alice and Rosalie lean into Bella a little to make her smile, and then jump into talking about boys and sex and manicures and bad movies. Bella embraces the moment with her two new friends, and while the ache of missing her best friend doesn't go away, it eases a little as they do girl talk.

Bella yawns for the hundredth time and calls it a night, telling them about her bath plans, and then sleep plans.

"Hey Bella?" Rosalie stops her. "So, a little birdie may have told me that Edward melts when you scratch at his scalp line, right behind his ear. You should try it. I know Emmett likes his neck rubbed, makes him comply with everything." She winks at Bella, so of course, Bella blushes furiously, turning around to leave.

"Jasper likes his chest rubbed!" Alice yells, just as Bella gets out of the room, running smack-dab into Jasper's body, and subsequently, his chest.

"You like your chest rubbed," Bella babbles, wide-eyed and even redder than before.

"That I do," Jasper laughs, teasing. "Alice airing out our dirty little secrets again?"

Bella can't even answer, too embarrassed, so she turns out of Jasper's direct line of vision and makes a beeline for her room, closing the door and collapsing against it.

Edward comes in a second later, concerned. "Bella, where were you? Are you ok?"

"I got stuck with Alice and Rose. We were doing that thing where girls talk about everything that guys won't listen to."

"Sounds annoying?" Edward says, turning it into a question. Bella just shrugs and smiles.

"I'm fine, Edward, but I still need to take my bath. You going to sleep?"

"Can I. Uh, can I sit in there with you? I mean, like, once the bubbles are covering you? Like I did that one time?"

"Promise not to peek?" Bella asks, a hint of jesting in her tone, liking that Edward is squirming.

"Promise."

"I think you're gonna peek anyway," Bella laughs, rolling her neck. She walks into the bathroom, Edward on her heels and kneels to get the lighter out of the cabinet. "Go wait in your room. Once the bubbles are done and I'm sufficiently hidden, I'll call for you."

Edward nods and walks out of the bathroom, closing the door behind him. Bella takes the opportunity to pull out the lilac and vanilla bath oils and bubble bath to get the tub ready. The taps on high, she starts to hum and immediately feels the steam embrace her, slowly filling up the room, swirling with the floral smells. Undressing, she checks to make sure the paint is really all gone before she settles into the tub and turns off the taps.

Once she's covered, as far as she can tell, Bella calls out for Edward, who immediately opens the door, like he was waiting outside the door for her voice.

"Were you waiting at the door, Edward?"

Edward nods sheepishly, and bites at his lip as he walks toward the bathtub, now changed into his boxers. "I heard you singing to yourself, and I couldn't help it."

She shrugs and pats the lip of the tub, holding out a folded towel for Edward to rest his head against. "Are you ok today?" she asks him. "Want to talk about anything?"

He shakes his head 'no' and closes his eyes, letting Bella play with his hair, scratching at his scalp like Rosalie and Alice told her to.

"Today was a good day," he says after a second. "Except, me and you didn't kiss yet. And, I mean, if you want, I'd really like to kiss you again."

Bella smiles, her cheeks flushed again. "I'm a little indisposed at the moment, and moving could… show you some things we're both not ready for."

"Then don't move," Edward says, eyes open again as he smiles, moving to hover over her, careful of his arms. "Just one kiss," he whispers, waiting for Bella to tilt her head up. When she does, he licks at her bottom lip. Bella's whimpers aren't very loud, but in the silence of the bathroom, they echo off the walls like she had moaned. Her blush intensifies, but Edward doesn't stop. In fact, as Bella pulls back, Edward continues, moving from his crouching position up to his feet, sitting on the lip of the tub as he leans over Bella.

She brings her hands up to Edward's face, resting them at his cheeks, at first to stop him, and then to keep him close, holding him to her. She pulls him closer, sliding down into the tub, and Edward follows, licking his way into her mouth. Even still, Bella doesn't let go, just relents to him, kissing him back with just as much passion. He moves again, and this time, it makes Bella gasp and pull back; Edward's in the tub with her, straddling her waist.

"Edward!" she gasps, covering herself up, despite the assortment of bubbles. He's suddenly too close, much too close, and with the flimsy barrier of cotton between them, she's afraid of what will most certainly happen.

"Just kissing," Edward murmurs, leaning back in, arms carefully out of the water, resting on the lip of the tub behind Bella's head. "I promise, please, Bella. I need you to kiss me. Please."

Bella nods, slowly this time and watches as Edward keeps his eyes locked onto hers as he leans in, their bodies touching now more than they've ever touched before. She pulls her arms away from her chest and wraps them around Edward's neck as he licks at her lip again. "I'm going to kiss you again," Edward says, his breath on her lips. "Is that alright?"

Bella nods, minutely, and Edward does as he promised he'd do. He kisses her again. The kiss starts like the first, soft and sweet, and quickly escalates to more, more than just a kiss as Edward's hips involuntarily jerk down into her hips. She gasps, as does he, and when he moves to pull away, Bella tightens her hold and keeps him close. Bella grins when he moans back into her mouth and does it again.

Bella rocks her hips into his hardness, sucking his lip into her mouth, and then pulls back when she hears a knock at the bedroom door.

"Edward?"

Bella groans, blushing red. "Edward, that's your mother. You have to get out of here," she whispers. "Your mother is _right_ outside."

"Don't care," Edward moans, leaning back in to kiss her again. He wraps his hands in her hair and pulls her back to his mouth.

"Edward, honey, are you asleep?"

Bella again, pulls away. "Go Edward. Please."

He does, slowly, reluctantly, and stands up, carefully not looking down at her body, the bubbles all but gone. He wraps a towel around his waist and pulls off his soaked boxers, tossing them in the sink. Bella watches him leave, and then sinks down into the water to scream into it.

"What the fuck am I doing?" She asks herself, head in her hands after she resurfaces. "I'm going to get my heart broken."

* * *

a/n: this project is kind of my baby. The term "Superman Complex" is used for my own fabricated diagnosis. I have no medical background, although, I'm asking a psych major if things do make sense. Many, many thanks to _**the -glory-days**_, as always, for kicking me in the ass every time I stop writing. Updates will be few and far between, but because they're so much longer than my other chapter updates, I hope that's alright with you guys.

**Reviews are appreciated. I'd love to hear your feedback :]**


	9. Chapter 9

Edward Cullen is a rock star in the biggest band of the decade. He's America's "It Boy," but he's still unhappy. Will Bella be in time to save him? AH AU

Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer created **Twilight**; I'm just toying around with her characters.

---

After getting out of the tub, Bella dries off slowly, contemplating, and tries to remind herself that her first priority is Edward's health, not his (or her own) sexual appetite. She dresses herself in a pair of sweats and a tank top and exits the bathroom into Edward's room. When she gets in, and her eyes adjust, Edward's sitting on his bed, eyes downcast to his hands in his lap.

"Edward? What's wrong?" She asks, moving to sit down next to him, curling her legs up underneath her.

"I pushed too much, didn't I?" He asks, already so sure that he has, dejected and monotone."When Mom came up, she asked why I was wet, asked if you were in the bath, too. I. I told her I. I did not know _what_ to tell her, so I told her that you were in there now, that I was just finishing up. I. I lied to her, Bella."

"That's normal," Bella laughs. "Edward, every boy lies to his mother if he's caught in the act. That's nothing to be ashamed of. I mean, you were embarrassed, that's fine. And no, you didn't push too much. I just think that we should probably, you know… not get so close when we're so… naked?"

"I had my boxers on," Edward deadpans, shrugging, looking up for the first time. He looks back down almost immediately, with vibrant red cheeks.

"Your thin boxers were practically non-existent once they were wet, Edward, but that's beside the point. Baby, we can't just make out in the bathtub. Not right now, anyway. I mean, we have to be one-hundred percent focused on your health and getting you past this silly condition."

Edward sighs, nodding his head. "I know, it's just, today was such a good day, you know? We painted, and laughed, and I played, and sang for you, and. And Bella, you're so beautiful, so, so beautiful."

Blushing, Bella's the one to look away first this time, biting on her lip. "Thank you, Edward, but this is. This is something we need to take slowly. I mean, I've only been here for such a short time. We need to set some ground rules, set some goals for your recovery."

Groaning, Edward rolls his eyes. "Like the, 'you sleep alone, get a kiss' deal? Bella, I _like_ sleeping with you. It's not an incentive to get a kiss, when I can just sneak them when you're sleeping."

"Edward!" Bella gasps.

"What? I mean, you talk in your sleep. I can't help it if your words do things to me." He grins wide, like the proverbial cat that caught the canary. She moans in embarrassment and shakes her head. "How about we make some new rules then, hmm?"

She waits until she knows she's got his full attention and then ponders about it. "My immediate goals are to get the bandages off your arms, and have my knee be strong enough that I'm not limping around like Igor, ok?"

Edward nods.

"Good, so we're agreed that our physical health is our first priority. Secondly, I have some social goals for us. I want to go to Los Angeles with Jasper and Alice in three weeks. Now, in order to meet this goal, I'd like to try to get you out of the house, here around town, you understand?"

"Wait, like… around people? Bella. I. I don't-"

"You don't get a choice here. I think you're ready to go around town. It will be little things, just going for walks, getting coffee, things like that. I think if we go to La Push, it'll be easier. Don't you think? La Push is pretty close, right? My father's best friend lives on the reservation, and I can ensure our privacy out there."

"I don't know…"

"Edward, I don't _want_ to fly us out to LA without resocializing you first, but I will if you're not willing to go out here around town. I'm not going to stay in this house for years because you're afraid. You're already making so much progress, Edward. You can do this," Bella smiles, leaning in to kiss Edward's cheek. "Plus, we have to have lunch with my father next week."

That last part is a lie, but she hopes Edward can't tell, because she does _plan_ to go to lunch, she just hasn't called her father yet.

"What?" Edward looks frantic, his hands are shaking, and Bella knows she's done something right, knows this is the proper reaction. "Your… your father?"

"Of course, Edward. I mean, I told _everyone_ that he was the reason I was moving out here. It wouldn't make sense for me to say that without actually going to see him, right?" He shrugs his shoulders. "Anyway, I've already met your parents. It's your turn. My father's harmless, and he has no idea who you are, so it won't be a big deal when we go to his house."

"What if I have a break down, or if I freak out?" Edward asks, still nervous, jittering on the bed. Bella grabs his hands and smiles wide, catching his line of sight.

"I believe in you, Edward. I know you can do this, and besides, we're gonna start going in to town anyway, it can get you ready to meet my father."

Edward calms down – not a lot, but enough to make him sleepy. She stands him up and grabs the towel that he's wrapped up in and helps him over to the dresser. "Change into your pajama pants and come lay down," she tells him, handing him a pair of flannel pants. "We can talk about this tomorrow."

When he's dressed and back in bed, Bella takes a page from Rosalie's book and starts to scratch at Edward's scalp, calming him down. Soon enough, he's asleep, holding on to her tightly.

*

When Bella wakes up in the morning, it's to soft kisses all over her neck, accompanied by roaming hands under her tank top. She moans softly, arching into Edward's fingers. "Edward," she whispers breathily, licking her lip. "We talked about this. Our physical health is our first priority."

"My physical health is in dire need," Edward says, positioning himself between her legs. "If I don't touch you right now, I'm going to explode," he moans, rolling his hips into hers. She cries out, feeling his length, hard and hot against her sweats.

"Edward, please. Don't. We have to have boundaries."

"We do, clothes. Bella, stop thinking for just a minute, and just feel me," Edward groans. "You make me feel this way, I swear, I can't help myself. I _need_ you."

Bella tries to resist, tries until Edward sucks on the skin just below her ear. He lifts up her tank with his nimble fingers, just over her breasts so he can feel, and see, just how turned on she is.

"Edward, please." This time, the words come out not as resistance, but as a plea for more, begging for his hands to touch her, his hips to roll down onto her, his mouth to continue.

She brings her hands up; dragging them slowly up Edward's back and cups his shoulder blades as explores her body.

He kisses his way up her jaw to her lips and catches them with his own. When he bites down, Bella moans loudly into his mouth and digs her nails into his shoulders, arching her back up into him.

"Hey, Eddie, Mom's making pancakes, wake up!" Emmett calls through the door, pounding on it. "Jellybean, you too! You want chocolate chip or blueberry? I already know what Edward wants. Esme wants to know how you want yours."

Bella groans as Edward rolls off of her, and sits up, wiping at her lips. "It's too early for your yelling, Emmett," Bella yells at the door. "I like chocolate chips. We'll be down in fifteen."

Emmett makes an amused little noise in his throat and heads down the stairs, a muffled, "Edward and Bella, sitting in a tree," coming from him as he heads down the hall.

"Two times in less than twenty-four hours is a sign," Bella tells Edward. "We're going too fast, Edward."

Edward whines, "But Bella, you weren't stopping me two minutes ago, please, can we just finish this?"

"I don't think it's such a good idea, Edward. I'm sorry we got carried away, but really, we can't do this yet."

Edward groans, running his hand through his hair as he stares down at his still very hard cock. "What am I supposed to do, Bella? Will it away? It doesn't work like that."

Bella stands up, pulling her hair up into a rubber band, a messy bun at the top of her head, getting it out of the way. "I'm sorry, Edward, really I am, but I think we're crossing too many lines."

Edward all but growls as she walks away, then gets up to follow her, holding the door closed as she goes to open it. She turns around, surprised and reaches for the handle. "Edward, let go of the door."

Keeping his gaze, she watches as he shakes his head 'no', openly defying her. He closes the distance between them, presses himself up against her completely, pushing her back into the door. His hands trail down to her hips, just holding her there, tightly against the door.

"Edward, let me go," Bella says firmly. "Let me go before you do something you regret."

"How can I regret you?" He asks, leaning forward to kiss Bella. She moves her head to the side and puts her hands on his chest.

"Edward, let me go right now." Her voice is a little higher now, not afraid for her safety; just afraid of what Edward will think when he realizes what he's doing. "I mean it, Edward."

"I don't think you do," he whispers, kissing at her neck, just below her ear where he's already marked her. She shudders, but stays firm, ignoring his kisses, arms limply at her sides.

"You're going to regret this, Edward. Please, you're pushing too far." She uses his words from last night, hoping to trigger the little boy from last night, as opposed to whatever Edward this is now. "Edward, I mean it."

When she pushes at his chest, he fights it for a second and then releases her, blinking like he can't believe he just did that. "Oh, god, Bella."

"Don't," she whispers, wrapping her arms around him. "Don't shut me out. Talk to me. What was going through your head just then, baby?"

"I wanted you," he says, his voice so ashamed that Bella aches. "I wanted you even though you were telling me to stop, I wanted to keep going. I wanted to… I wanted to take you." He gasps out a breath and breaks down, hands gripping Bella tightly as his tears trail down his cheeks.

"Hey, it's ok," she whispers. "You stopped, Edward. You're stronger than that, love. You did it." Her voice is soft and hopeful as Edward squeezes her. "We need to keep the boundaries in place, Edward, for a while longer, ok?"

Edward nods as she wipes at his cheeks, and then tip toes up to kiss his full lips. "I love you for stopping," she whispers, hands draped over his shoulders, toying with the hair at the nape of his neck. "You're so strong."

He lets out a soft breath, relieved, and nods, leading her out of the room and toward the hall. When they get to the kitchen, Bella sees that Emmett is half-cocked and ready to make a joke, but she shakes her head quickly and glances at Edward's sullen face. Emmett's grin falters, but he looks at Bella and nods once, letting her know that he won't make the joke.

Breakfast is quiet, even Esme and Alice are quiet as they discuss Alice and Jasper's flight details. They'll be gone for a week, starting today, and when they get back, Bella will get the rest of her furnishings. Bella smiles politely but goes back to her breakfast without any comment. She keeps her fingers linked tightly to Edward's throughout the meal, and even after, as they all sit and wait for the taxi to come and pick up Alice and Jasper.

When the car honks from the driveway, Alice asks to talk to Bella alone. Bella gets up to help Alice with one her bags, and when they're alone, Alice smiles softly at Bella. "Esme said she interrupted something intimate last night," Alice confides. "Is everything alright?"

Bella's face falters for a minute. "Everything's going to be," she answers. "We have to stick to our boundaries for a while, even though it's obvious that we both want so much more. I need to make sure he's healthy, and that it's not just the condition making him want this."

Bella realizes after it's out that that's her main fear. That Edward doesn't really want her, maybe physically, maybe romantically, that it's just the condition. When she looks up, Alice is smiling sadly at her.

"Bells, Edward, condition or not, loves you, I just know it," she smiles. "I have a flight to catch, but if you need me, or decide you want anything from LA, call me."

Bella nods and heads back into the house as Alice and Jasper leave for the week. She goes up to Carlisle's study and asks to discuss her new plans.

"I want to take him out," she tells Carlisle easily. "I want to take him into town, or to the reservation and have him interact with people. You're all family, he knows you well, but I have a feeling that meeting and interacting with strangers will be much harder for him."

"Do you think he's particularly ready for this, Bella?" Carlisle asks. She sees his worried gaze and nods to reassure him.

"Yes, I do. I think he's content with what he knows here in this house, and if we don't get him out of it soon, he's going to be afraid to leave forever. Plus, Carlisle, I have to go see my father. My mother will call him eventually, and if I don't go see him, the lie I've crafted will fall apart."

"I realize that you've been here for a few weeks now, Bella, but do you really think he's ready to go out?" Carlisle asks again. "Do you think he could stay here at the house while you go see your father?"

"And what if he breaks down, Carlisle? I'll be hours away, and even if I was speeding all the way home, I wouldn't be here fast enough. I want him to get out of his comfort zone.. I mean, he's pressing at his boundaries enough as it is."

"What are you talking about?" He asks her, and as soon as he does, she groans.

"He's been… more physically responsive, for the last few hours," she says, trying as lightly as possible to bring up the fact that maybe, _maybe_, Dr. Crowley was right when he said that Edward would expect a physical, intimate relationship.

"Physically responsive," Carlisle repeats, and Bella sees that he understands where she's going. "Has he… has he forced himself on you?"

"Oh god, Carlisle, no. Absolutely not. It's just; he's been pushing at our boundaries. Like, I've insisted that we don't, uh, start a physical relationship, at least not until we're both physically healed. I mean, my knee is still ridiculously bruised, and he's still got stitching, and… and I'm not ready for that yet. But he tries, and."  
"And what, Bella. What has he done?"

Bella sighs, biting her lip. "He wasn't particularly happy this morning when Emmett, uh, interrupted us. We were just, uh, fuck, Carlisle. I can't have this conversation with you."

When Bella looks up, Carlisle's smiling, and… laughing? "Wait, are you laughing at me?"

"I can't help it, Bella. You're so adorable. Honestly, little one. Having this conversation, should be a breeze. I mean, after everything we've already discussed, this should be cake."

"I practically attacked your son, Carlisle, I'm taking advantage."

"If I know my son, you're not," he laughs, falling back into his chair, laughing loudly at her.

"Carlisle!" Bella admonishes. "Honestly. You're a child!"

Soon enough, he sobers, and asks her to continue her previous conversation. She explains how they were interrupted and how when she tried to leave, Edward held the door closed, and how she had to talk him down; how ashamed he was.

"I can't say that I'm alright with the fact that he almost forced himself on you," Carlisle says. "And I can see why you're trying to get him out of the house. If you put his focus elsewhere, you can keep his mind off the physical stimuli he's craving. Shall I consult with Dr. Crowley about this?"

"No," Bella answers quickly. "If you bring this to his attention, he'll say 'I told you so', and that's not the kind of answer we need. I think we need to try to push him a little. I think that we need to get him into the next stage."

There's a silence as Bella confesses this, and when she catches Carlisle's eye, he's obviously wary. "Bella, you know what he'll try if you do push him into the next stage. We've discussed this."

"I know," she tells him, nodding once, resolutely. "He'll begin to hate me, and to emotionally, verbally, and physically fight me off. Carlisle, this is the only way for him to get better. I mean, after he goes through this stage, we can gauge where to go from there, based on his reactions. It's been, what, a month since the accident? We need to get him out of this comfortable bubble."

"I'll need to talk to Esme about this, Bella. I… I know you're trying to do the right thing here, and I honestly agree with you, but this will impact the entire family. He'll push us all away again."

Bella nods and stands. "I understand, Carlisle, but I want to take him to the rez tomorrow, so please discuss this with Emmett, Rosalie, and Esme, as soon as you can."

She leaves the study and finds Edward in his bedroom, playing with her laptop.

"Who's Peppermint Patty, Bella? Is that you?"

Bella groans and plops down on the bed to sit beside Edward. "Yes," she admits. "Why are you reading my journal?"

"It was open, I didn't know. Are you mad at me?"

She shakes her head no, and leans in to rest on his shoulder. "No, I'm not mad. Carlisle asked me to keep a log of everything, and I didn't want to add real names, so I added in Peanuts characters instead."

"Rosalie really is like Lucy, huh? She's bitchy and controlling," Edward laughs, closing the laptop. Bella laughs, and takes the piece of technology from him and sets it on the night stand.

"Hey, how do you feel about going for a walk on the beach tomorrow?" She asks him, curling up next to him. I think you're ready."

"What? You mean, like out?"

"Yes, Edward, out of the house," she laughs, placing a kiss to his neck. "My friend Jacob lives out there, I've known him since we were kids. He and his wife own a little café out there. We can go get a coffee from his place, then head out to the beach, take a little walk. How does that sound?"

"What if I… What if I do something bad?"

"We can deal with it if it happens, Edward. I believe in you, and I think you can do it, ok? We'll see how you're feeling when we wake up tomorrow."

She can feel him nod as he buries in close to her. "What's Jacob like?" He asks her quietly. "And his wife, what's she like?"

Bella goes on to discuss Jake and Ness, how they were all friends growing up, and then finally the two of them eloped, and moved into a little apartment above a café on the rez. She tells him about all the mischief the three of them used to get into and as she goes into a particular stunt they tried to pull, the bedroom door opens, fast and wide, with Esme standing in the doorway with tears down her cheeks.

"Isabella, I need to speak with you."

Edward grips her tight, afraid to let her go, and tries to shield her from his mother.

"Edward, it's ok, let me go. I'm just going to talk to your mom," Bella says, sliding out of his grasp.

"Bella, no," he whispers. "She's upset. Please don't go."

"I'm alright, Edward, I promise. I'll be right back."

She gets up from the bed, winks at Edward, and then follows Esme out of the room and down the hallway to Carlisle's study. When the door closes, Esme turns on her.

"Are you out of your mind?" She's crying again, holding her balled up fists at her sides, clenching and shaking. "You're trying to push Edward into the next stage? Are you completely insane? I just got my son back!"

"Esme," Bella says softly. "Please understand that he's not back. He's just… he's floating through this, but he's not getting better."

"And who do you think you are to say that he's not getting any better? He's my son, I think I would know if he wasn't, don't you?" Esme starts pacing back and forth.

"I don't want to come between anyone, Esme, but he's not getting better. He's stagnant. He's… he's pushing boundaries, but not trying to get better. He's content here. We need to push him so that he can get past this condition."

"I won't let you!" Esme says, sobbing. "Carlisle, he told me. He told me how Edward will act when you do this, when you push him. I won't lose my son again!"

Bella grimaces, because what can she really say to that? Nothing. She is going to lose her son again, for however long it takes for him to move to the next stage. "It's only temporary, Es-"

"Only temporary? Bella, I lost my son months ago. I. I didn't even _know_ that he was unhappy, I just saw him pull away, and I didn't do anything about it! I…. I could have stopped it all; I could have stopped him from trying to. Trying to kill himself," she wails, falling to her knees, sobbing violently.

"Oh Esme," Bella sighs, heartbroken. She moves to her, kneeling before her and wrapping her arms around her. "There was nothing you could do, Esme. He… he made a decision, and nothing could have stopped him. None of this is your fault."

"I could have," she says, sniffling. "I could have called him more, let him know that he was loved. I could have –"

"He knew he was loved. The minute I met you I knew you loved him, Esme, there's nothing you could have done."

"That's why I can't let you do this, Bella. I can't lose him again, not if I can stop it this time. I wasn't there, for my baby, I wasn't there… this time, I am. I'm here and I can't let you take him away again."

There's a knock on the door, and Carlisle comes in, a sad expression on his face. "Bella, honey, Edward's frantic out here, can you come calm him down?"

She looks up at him and nods, unwrapping herself from Esme. "Esme, I… I'm taking him to the rez tomorrow, for coffee, and a walk on the beach. He needs to get out of the house." Bella blinks, wiping at the tears on her cheek and takes a deep breath. She looks at Carlisle, silently pleading with him to talk to Esme, to convince her. He nods and lets her through the door, only to be immediately assaulted by Edward.  
His arms are wrapped around her, his breath erratic as he buries his head in her neck. "Oh Bella, is everything alright?"

She smiles sadly at Edward's mop of hair and combs her fingers through it. "Everything is just fine, Edward. Don't be worried. I'm right here."

"I was so scared; please don't leave me, Bella. Please don't leave me."

Bella places a chaste kiss into his hair at the crown on his head and sighs. "Not until you tell me to go," she whispers. She knows he can hear her, but this time, when she says it, she thinks that the day he tells her to go is in her immediate future.

*

"Ok, so we're just going to the rez, it's about twenty minutes down the road, and we're going to First Beach. I have my phone, Edward has his, and I'll call if anything occurs, ok?"

Carlisle and Esme are huddled close to the door, nodding slowly. "Just be safe, and watch out for paparazzi."

"Jake assured me that the rez has a no-camera code or something," Bella tells him. "I called him this morning. We'll be alright."

The drive to the rez is short; Bella knows the way even in the dark, with her eyes closed. When they get there, Bella parks Carlisle's Benz in the small garage space that Jake has ready for them. When they get out of the car, Jacob is on her in an instant, twirling her around and laughing.

"Jake, put me down," Bella giggles. When he does, Edward wraps his arms around her protectively, and almost growls. Bella shakes her head, and pulls away. "Edward, this is my very good friend, Jacob. Jake, this is Edward."

"Hey, nice to meet you, Edward!" Jake smiles easily, Bella shakes her head minutely, silently asking Jake to back off for a second.

"Edward's not much of a people person, Jake. Can you just give us a minute, and we'll meet you inside?"

Jake shrugs and nods, leaning in to kiss Bella's forehead. "Ness is gonna shit when she sees how hot you've gotten! It's been way too long, Swan."

Bella rolls her eyes at Jake's retreating figure and laughs, turning to face Edward. "Hey, you ok?" Bella asks, looking up at Edward, her hands twined behind his back. "Edward?"

"I don't like him," Edward says quietly. "He touched you, I don't like it."

"Edward, he and I have been friends forever, we're gonna interact. It's ok, babe, I promise."

Edward shakes his head. "I want to go home, Bella. Please."

Bella sighs, shaking her head. "Baby, please do this with me. Jake and Ness are important to me. They mean a lot to me, and they're already expecting us. Let's just get coffee and head to the beach ok?"

Edward nods, holding onto her tighter than before. "Say you're mine, Bella," he pleads. "Please tell me you're mine."

Bella looks up at him, catching the seriousness in his eyes. "Edward," she whispers, blinking. "I'm yours. Of course I'm yours."

He closes his eyes and rests his forehead against hers. "I don't want to lose you, Bella."

"You won't lose me, Edward," she tells him, pushing up to kiss him softly. "I'm yours. Now, can we please go see my friends?"

He pulls her close for a minute, just holding her, and then kisses her cheek, nodding. "I'm sorry, Bella. Please don't be upset."

They walk up into the cafe and see both Ness and Jake behind the counter, arguing amiably about pastries to Seth Clearwater.

"Bella!" Ness yells! "Perfect, you're here. Now, tell me, Blueberry Scone, or Cinnamon Apple Muffin?"

"Cinnamon Apple," Bella answers easily. "Obviously."

Seth winks back at her and expresses his thanks. "I was afraid they'd argue about the pastries all morning. I should have known better than to ask them which they preferred. You know they like making everything a competition."

"And you chose my favorite pastry," Jacob says. "That means you like me better than Ness."

"You guys are so lame!" Bella sighs. "But while you're back there, running a café, get Seth his damn muffin, and get me two coffees and two blueberry scones."

Ness comes out from behind the counter, despite Bella's orders, and hugs her, kissing her cheek. "It's so good to see you, Bella Bear. Are you staying here long?" She pauses, looking to Edward to introduce herself.

"Edward, this is Ness. Ness, this is Edward."

"Hello," Edward says tersely, trying to smile. "Your café is nice."

Bella smiles up at Edward easily and leans against him. "We're gonna go sit at the corner table, ok? We can't stay long, we've got plans this morning, but I wanted to say hello, and get some of the best coffee in the state of Washington, you know?"

As she and Edward walk back to their table, Seth pats Bella on the back and smiles. "Good to see you, Bells. Make sure you say hi to my mom today, before you go, ok?"

"Yeah, of course, Seth. Good to see you as well!" Seth leaves the café with a grin, just as Jacob comes up and sets their coffees down.

"So, how long are you in my part of town, Bells?"

Bella looks to Edward, smiles easily. "Haven't really decided yet. I'm here for a while at least. We'll see."

Edward tightens his hold on her hand and nudges his head to the door.

"Hey Jake, Ness, we're gonna head down to the beach, ok? I'll be in touch soon. Thanks for the coffee."

"Don't be a stranger, Bella Swan," Jacob calls after them as they leave the café and head down to the beach.

"Everything ok, Edward?" Bella asks, concerned. "Are you alright?"

"I couldn't breathe in there," he tells her slowly as they make their way down to the sand. "There were too many people, Bella. I couldn't breathe, I was so scared."

He wraps his arms around her, cautious of their coffees and holds onto her tightly. "Oh god, Bella, I was so afraid."

"You're alright, Edward, it's ok," she murmurs, trying to calm him down. "You're shaking, Edward, please calm down."

"Don't let me go, Bella. Just hold me," he pleads. "I need you, Bella. I don't want you to leave me."

"You're not ready," Bella tells him. "I pushed you too hard, didn't I?" She looks up at him and catches his eye. "You're not ready for this are you?"

Edward shivers, and shakes his head 'no.' "I'm sorry, Bella. I tried to do this for you. I know you wanted to do this, but I can't. I can't breathe."

"Ok, baby, its ok, Edward. We're gonna get you home."

They walk back up to the car as quickly as they can, stopping in to say goodbye to Ness and Jake before taking off. When they get back to the Cullen house, Carlisle and Esme are waiting for them on the porch.

When they get out of the car, Bella pulls Edward up the path and looks at Carlisle, shaking her head. He nods in understanding, and lets them go upstairs without any conversation.

She helps Edward out of his coat and shoes and helps him lay down. When she rids herself of her own coat and shoes, she joins him, lying beside him, rubbing at his chest.

"I'm so sorry, Edward. I'm so sorry."

* * *

a/n: this project is kind of my baby. The term "Superman Complex" is used for my own fabricated diagnosis. I have no medical background. Many, many thanks to _**the-glory-days**_, as always, for kicking me in the ass every time I stop writing. Updates will be few and far between, but because they're so much longer than my other chapter updates, I hope that's alright with you guys.

**Reviews are appreciated. I'd love to hear your feedback :]**


	10. Chapter 10

Edward Cullen is a rock star in the biggest band of the decade. He's America's "It Boy," but he's still unhappy. Will Bella be in time to save him? AH AU

Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer created **Twilight**; I'm just toying around with her characters.

**AN:** **I don't really like doing Author's Notes pre-chapter, but I've had the same questions from 45678 people, so I'll address them here, just once :D**

**1: do you write the lyrics / poems / songs for "Twilight"?**  
Answer: Yes. I write the lyrics, poems, and songs for this story.

**2. how old are the characters / when does this take place / what month are they in?  
**Answer: All of these are subjective. Sometimes when I'm reading a story, I get so confused as to whether we're in April or if Bella's twenty-one, that I don't follow the main story as aptly as I should. For this reason, I've left those details to you. For the ages, which are a little more necessary, just think that Bella is around 22-24ish, and very young to be handly what she's handling. Alice is around her age, Rosalie and Edward are about the same age, and Jasper and Emmett are a bit older. No one over 29-30. See them how you see them, it's not pertinant to the plot.

**3. do you have a twitter?  
**Answer: Yes, it's brand – spanking- new and you can most certainly add me **at cevuplay** . I'll try my best to update and send teasers and stuff. You can also go to the Twillighted thread, (in my profile) set up by the-glory-days.

4. a lot of plot related questions have been asked, such as things like how Esme handles things, how Edward could have felt isolated with a family as amazing as his, etc. Anything plot related will come in the chapters, not an AN ;)

Ok, so, on a happier note, my BFF and beta **the-glory-days** made an amazing banner for this story, its on my profile. If you haven't already, check out her story **MAIL ON SUNDAYS**. It's her new one, and it's already VERY promising.

On to the chapter!

---

A knock at the door gets Bella's attention as she and Edward lay in a restless embrace. Edward continues to twist and turn, eyes shut tight as Bella holds him. She alternates between rubbing his back and his chest, and whispers soothing words into his ear.

"Bella." It's Carlisle. His head is ducked in as he looks at the two of them. "Dr. Crowley is on the phone and would very much like to consult with the two of us on Edward's condition, I hate to interrupt. Should I have him call back?"

"Now's not a very good time, Carlisle," she tells him, pushing Edward's hair off of his forehead. "Can you give me an hour or so?" Carlisle nods and heads back out the way he came.

"No, Bella, it's alright," Edward murmurs, twisting to face her. "You can go talk to Dr. Crowley."

Carlisle stops, waiting for Bella's response.

"Edward, no, I'm not leaving you," she whispers to him, just to him. "Tyler can wait. You're more important to me than him." Edward just shakes his head at her and kisses at the corner of her mouth. "You can sleep, I'll stay right here."

"May I recommend a compromise?" Carlisle interjects. "Edward, why don't you come with us. You won't have to talk to Crowley of course, but you can sit in and listen?"

Edward looks at Bella, and Bella nods easily. "Of course, Edward, come with us. We can sit on your father's couch while they talk terms that I don't quite understand. Maybe you can help me fill in the blanks."

Edward smiles at her widely as he sits up. "Ok, Bella, we can go sit."

"Great, great. I'll go tell Tyler that you'll be joining me, Bella. I'll give you two a minute."

When he leaves and the door closes behind him, Bella puts her palms on Edward's cheeks and stares into his eyes. "Edward, I'm so sorry, baby. I pushed you too hard, you weren't ready, and I didn't listen to you."

Edward's hands come up to cover her own, and he pulls them away from his cheeks and down to his lap. "You're trying to help me, Bella, I know that. I'm sorry I wasn't strong enough."

"Oh no, Edward, you're so strong, baby. Never think you're not strong enough. You did everything you could, and I pushed you too hard. We'll wait for a while before we go out again, ok? I'll call my dad and tell him to give me a bit longer before the drive up, ok?"

"Bella, no! We're going to see your father," he tells her. "I'm going to be the boyfriend you deserve, and I'm going to meet your father."

"Boyfriend, hmm?" Bella asks, a smirk on her lips. Edward nods and leans in close, a smile on his face. "You think you're my boyfriend now?"

"I know I am," he says with a grin, licking his lips before he rests his forehead against hers. "You're mine, remember?"

"Yours," Bella breathes, watching as Edward moves in closer, pressing his lips against hers. When he pulls back, she smiles and breathes a sigh in relief.

"I'm yours too, you know," he tells her. "I've _been_ yours."

She nods, getting off the bed and pulling him along behind her. "Let's get this over with as quickly as possible."

Edward nods and follows behind her, shuffling his feet as he does. She grins as she enters Carlisle's study, pulling Edward over to the couch.

"Tyler, Bella's here now, so we can continue the earlier conversation with her. "Please start from the beginning, Tyler."

"Hello, Bella, it's great that we're able to converse together finally," Dr. Crowley says, and Bella can just _see_ his creepy leer from through the phone. "Carlisle tells me you've been having a bit of trouble within the last couple of days."

"No," Bella says, shaking her head as Edward settles his head on her lap. "No trouble, just uneasy instances."

"Well, sounds like a little more than just uneasy instances," Dr. Crowley continues. "As a doctor, I don't really want to say I told you so, but… I told –"

"Enough, Tyler," Carlisle says sternly into the speaker phone. "Please act like a professional."

"I'm just trying to reiterate what I've already tried to explain to Bella," Tyler says. "I can't be blamed for my advice and warnings falling on deaf ears, Carlisle."

"Hey, Tyler?" Bella says, rolling her eyes. "If you took a step back for a second, you'd realize that this case was bigger than you or your stupid theories about how Edward could react. So what, you got something right. It wasn't like he forced himself on me, it was completely mutual."

"Mutual? You realize that your feelings could-"

"Could heal him? He's scared and learning, and healing, and I'm sorry, but the way I feel for him won't jeopardize that. He's surpassing every known stage of his condition, and I'm not going to stop him from his progress, even if that progress doesn't follow your stupid rules."

"Now, wait a minute, Bella," Tyler tries. "I don't think you understand the severity of this."

"No, I definitely do," Bella interrupts him before he can continue. "I understand completely how my feelings can change his recovery process, but I have to be true to myself, and I have to be honest with him if I ever expect him to be honest with me. So, if you don't mind, I'd like you to be a tad more professional when you interact with us. Stop treating Edward like a case-study, and do what doctors are supposed to do; treat Edward as a human, as a patient – _your_ patient. You should be ashamed of yourself."

Tyler doesn't say anything for a second, so Bella continues. "Now, if you don't mind, I'd like to discuss Edward's progress," Carlisle, smiling happily, nods, so Bella keeps going. "Edward and I went out today, to a town nearby for coffee, and while it wasn't a complete success, we've made progress. Hopefully, within the next week or so, we can try again, and try to get to the next stage in his recovery."

Edward looks up at Bella with a proud smile on his face and kisses at her palm.

"He's already done so much in just the last month, I don't want to push him as hard as I did today, but we're going to try again, next week. We're gonna go to Seattle to see my father. That should be pretty simple. I think Edward and I have a plan on how to take this condition and make it work for us."

"You've gone out? What about the bandages. S-C patients aren't supposed to be active in the community for months into the recovery. You're going to push him too far."

"No," Carlisle says. "I don't think she is. Isabella is quite capable of testing Edward's limits without pushing too far, Tyler. She has his best interests at heart at all times, and knows when to say 'no.' I'm not worried about him in her care. She's better than any psychologist that the family could have hired. And if, in the mean time, Edward finds that he loves Bella, and she him, then who am I to stop them."

"Carlisle, you know that his feelings are a result of the condition," Tyler argues. Bella can hear his fist slam down onto what she assumes is his desk.

"Then so be it," Bella answers for him. "If it turns out that his feelings aren't as we suspect, then sure, I'll be a little upset, but his wellbeing means more to me the relationship we could have. I want him to be healed and happy and to be able to put this condition in his past. I don't want to make this a big deal."

Edward looks up at her, a frown where his smile once was. He sits up and puts his lips to her ear. "Bella, I love you, it's _not_ my condition, you know that," his whisper is sharp and distinct. "I'm yours."

Bella nods as Edward places a soft kiss behind her ear. "I know, Edward," she whispers back. "I love you, too. I love you enough to let you go."

Edward gasps and pulls away. "No!" he shouts. "No! You can't go. Bella, don't let me go!" There's a small commotion on Carlisle's desk, but Bella's focus remains on Edward.

"Calm down, Edward, please," Bella says, reaching for him. He stands up fast and pushes Bella away.

"No, no. Don't say that. You're going to leave me!" he yells, standing directly in front of her. "Tell me the truth, Bella. Tell me."

Bella looks up at Edward sadly, holding her hands out for him to take. She knows Tyler can hear her, knows he's probably taking notes on everything. "You know my answer, Edward," she says softly, making sure all of his attention is on her. "You know that I won't leave until you tell me to go."

"Maybe you should just go now," Edward says, arms crossed defensively over his chest. "If you're just going to leave, why not now? Leave Bella. Get out of this house. You're going to do it anyway, why not now? Go live with _Jacob_," he sneers. His eyes are deep black, when Bella blinks the tears away.

Bella's silent for a moment, taking a deep breath as she looks up at him.

"Maybe I should then, if that's what you think is best," Bella says, shrugging his shoulders sadly, moving to stand up. When she stands, she walks to the door, tears in her eyes. "Carlisle, Tyler, we'll continue this later."

"Oh," Carlisle says. "I hung up on Tyler the minute Edward spoke up. He doesn't need to hear anything personal. I'll email him later."

Bella looks back at Carlisle, relieved. "Thank you, Carlisle. Excuse us for a minute."

She walks out of the study and to her room and waits for Edward to follow her. When Edward gets to the room, he slams the door, making her gasp. "What the fuck do you think you're doing?" he asks, stomping toward her.

"I'm going to pack," she says sadly. "You want me to go; I told you I'd leave when you asked me to."

She gets to the closet before Edward's arms are pressed tight over her chest, forcing her back to hit his chest quickly, so quickly that her breath leaves her in a rush. "I'm not finished with you yet," he whispers angrily in her ear. "You don't go until I say you go."

Bella melts back into him. "You already told me to go, Edward. I told you I would stay until you told me to go."

"Where are you gonna go, Bella? To _him_?" Edward asks, running his nose down Bella's jaw, his breath hot on her skin. "How quickly you drop your feelings for me over him, you capricious girl." He releases her then and pushes her toward the closet. "Go then. Pack. Get the fuck out of here."

Bella nods, her back to him and whimpers out a soft cry. She knew this was coming, she knew this is what she needed to do, but now that she's pushed him this far, she's reluctant to go. She knows that he'll stop her before she gets out the door – hopes that he'll stop her. She has to tell him the truth though, has to make sure he knows the truth, and then if he still wants her to go, she'll go.

She turns around to face him, sees his rigid posture, his still coal-black eyes and his murderous scowl. She takes a deep breath and steadies herself. "I'm sorry I pushed you today," she begins, her voice soft. "You kept trying to tell me that you weren't ready, and I pushed you too hard. I'll leave, just as you asked, but not because of Jacob, or Ness, or anyone else. It's only you, Edward."

Pausing, she glances up at him slowly. "I'm _yours_. My feelings for you haven't changed from what they were an hour ago. I love you. It's stupid and foolish, and it could be the worst mistake I've ever made, but I do. I love you with everything I have. Nothing in my life could compare to the way I feel when we're together, despite this condition. My feelings for you grow every day, every minute."

She turns back around to the closet before he can respond, not sure that she can watch his face as he tells her to leave again. She grabs for her overnight bag, waiting for his response, and starts to collect some of her things and putting them in the bag.

"Bella," she hears. The word is soft, like a plea, and when she turns around, Edward's eyes are still black, but his face is softened. She's not sure what to expect now, not this time.

"Yes?"

"You need to leave," he tells her softly. "Please get out of here. Please leave me. Go."

She nods, taking only what she's packed and stops in front of him, despite his request. "I love you," she whispers, kissing his cheek. "I'll always will."

She walks to the door, down the hallway and down to Carlisle's study. "It's time," she tells him, eyes watery, cheeks wet. "I'm, uh," she stutters, "I'm going to call a cab and go to the beach down at La Push. I have my phone, if anything, you know… uh, call me, ok?"

Carlisle stands to stop her, but she waves him away. "I told him I'd stay until he told me to and that's what I'm going to do. This is for the best, Carlisle."

She closes the study door fast, and scurries down the stairs, toward the front door. When she closes the front door, she pauses for a minute when she hears Edward's anguished cry. She stops, not sure she can make the call to the cab company, let alone go anywhere but here. Instead, she crumbles down next to the front door and cries.

There's a loud commotion as Bella breaks down, and then she hears Carlisle shout for Emmett, and then Esme's screams. There's a second of quiet before the sounds of running can be heard, loud steps stomping down the staircase. The front door whips open then with a frantic looking Edward.

Before he sees her curled up by the door, he screams out her name, deafeningly terrifying. She moves to stand as Carlisle and Emmett make it to the door. As soon as he hears her, he turns in her direction and runs the few feet to her, tackling her to the ground with a fierce hold.

"You don't get to leave," he tells her, holding her tight. It's not a tight lover's embrace, it's hard and cold, and so not Edward.

Carlisle and Emmett look at the two of them curiously, with Carlisle holding Emmett back. "Edward, get the fuck off of her!" Emmett shouts. "Carlisle, let me go. He's gonna hurt her."

"He won't hurt me," she tells him, her voice labored from the pressure on her chest. "Edward, let me up."

"Carlisle, you saw what he did to that fucking mirror, he's gonna hurt her. Let me restrain him!"

Edward doesn't move, but Bella does, she moves her hands up to his chest and pushes him up as hard as she can. "You wanted me to go, Edward. Not me. You can't have it both ways. I stay or I go. You choose. You _chose!"_ she tells him as he releases her. "Get off of me and make up your mind."

She gets up to her feet and brushes her backside off, her hands wiping at the dirt from the porch. When she pulls her hands away, there's blood staining her pale palm. She looks up curiously, and then down at Edward's hand. His hand is also stained with the crimson liquid, his knuckles swollen.

"Carlisle?"

"He punched the mirror in your room, Bella," he says sadly. "It shattered at his force."

"Edward, let me see your hand," she says softly. "We need to clean this up."

"Don't touch me!" He screams, looking at her with the same murderous look on his face. "Don't touch me! God, Bella!" He says, closing his eyes. "Get out of here before I _force_ you to stay! Get out of here!"

Bella gasps then, finally understanding what he was trying to tell her. The softened face, the defensive jealousy, the confusion. He wasn't trying to protect himself from getting hurt. He was trying to protect _her_!

"I'm not going," she says sternly. "I'm staying, Edward. I don't care what you want anymore."

She glances at Carlisle and Emmett, sees the confusion on their faces. She puts her attention back on Edward and watches as he looks up at her again. She steadies her gaze and makes sure he knows she's serious. "I'm staying."

His black eyes falter, his mouth twitching. "Bella, don't," he whispers. She watches as he begins to sway and closes the distance between them just in time to catch him from falling backwards, unconscious.

"Emmett, help me," she gasps, holding him as much as she can. "Help me get him back inside. It's over now."

Emmett nods and hurries to Bella's side, taking Edward and hauling him up into his arms.

"Take him to his room, Emmett," she tells him, grabbing for Carlisle. "Carlisle, wait for a moment." When Emmett disappears, she looks up at Carlisle. "He didn't want me to go, Carlisle. He was trying to protect me. I… he doesn't want this for me! This whole time, I thought he was going to push me away for him, but he was pushing me away to get me out of this, so I didn't-"

"Have to watch him fail," Carlisle finishes her sentence. "He's trying to protect you." His voice is incredulous, as is his face. "Fascinating."

"Carlisle, you have to fix his hand before he wakes up. I need to be alone with him when he comes to. Please, Carlisle."

He seemingly snaps out of his trance and nods. "Yes, that's probably for the best."

Bella races up the stairs to check the damage of her room, running into it to find Rosalie and Esme cleaning up the mess. When Rosalie sees Bella at the door, she lets out a breath. "Fuck, Bella that was so fucking scary! He punched the glass just as we all got here and screamed for you. Emmett thought he was going to kill you. He looked so angry; I'm so glad you're ok," she says, coming up to Bella and hugging her tight.

"I'm ok, Rosalie."

Esme smiles up at Bella and comes to kiss her cheek. "Tell me you're doing the right thing, Bella, please? I need to know you know what you're doing."

"I… I think I'm doing the right thing, Esme, I promise. I don't want to hurt him, he'll be… he'll be ok when he wakes up, Esme, I promise you that."

Esme nods and pulls Rosalie away from her as they go back to work. "I'm going to sit in with Edward until he wakes up. We'll come down when he's ready, ok?" The girls nod at her and she walks back to Edward's room, where Carlisle's already dressing Edward's latest wound.

"Well, Bella, the good news is, his stitches can come out today," Carlisle says. "I'm going to do that while he's asleep. I checked the bandages, to see if he messed them up any worse, but turns out… they're in perfect condition."

Bella smiles as she climbs up to sit Indian-style on the bed next to Edward. She pushes the hair off of his forehead and kisses his cheek as Carlisle finishes up dressing his fist and then pulling out the stitches. His wrists look frail and the scars are vibrant in contrast to his coloring, but the wounds are healed. She kisses each of the scars as Carlisle cleans up.

"Bella?"

"Yes, Carlisle?" she asks, looking away from Edward.

"You're the missing link," he tells her. "He's… you're the one."

Bella smiles at Carlisle and nods. "He's gonna be ok, Carlisle. It's gonna be alright."

Carlisle leans down and kisses Bella's forehead as he picks up his bag to leave. "I'll leave you to it, Bella. Thank you for staying."

"I'm not going anywhere, not anymore."

He closes the door behind him on his way out and then it's just the two of them. She curls up next to him and wraps her arms around him, her head resting on his chest. "No matter what, Edward, I'm never going to leave your side," she whispers to him softly, watching his eyelids flutter. "Never. You're going to fall, and I'm going to be there to pick up the pieces. I promise you that, Edward Cullen. I'm going to save you."

Edward sleeps for hours, late into the evening, without stirring once. Around six, Esme knocks on the bedroom door and slips inside, bringing a plate of sandwiches in for Bella, and a glass of milk. She doesn't ask any questions, just smiles at Bella and leaves the room. Bella's grateful for the silence. She doesn't know if she can take Esme's disappointed stares any longer than she just had to endure.

After eating one of the halves of the sandwich, Bella drinks her milk and curls back up into Edward's side, running her fingers through his hair softly as she hums to him.

Midnight rolls around and finally, _finally_, Edward stirs, waking up with a start and a gasp. He sits up bone straight, rigid and frightened and reaches out for Bella's hand. "Bella, Bella, you're still here," he says softly, partly relieved, partly disappointed.

"No matter what, Edward," she says, yawning. "You're stuck with me. I'm not going to leave you." She tells him again that she knows he's scared, that he's going to make mistakes, and have outbursts, but she tells him that none of that matters, because every time he does break down, he's healing. He's healing and getting better, and Bella makes sure Edward realizes that she's not going anywhere, ever.

"You can't stay, Bella," he murmurs sadly. "If you stay, you're going to miss out on so much. I… I don't know how long this will take, and I want to get better, I do. I'm so afraid that I'm going to make a mistake with you, that I'm going to hurt you like I did this morning, or like I did this afternoon. I…. I don't want to hurt you."

Bella hesitates for a second, thinking of what to say. "Then don't do it again, Edward. What you did today, it was an unforeseeable instance, but now we know better, we learned more about your condition today. We know more now than we ever did about Superman Complex."

Bella sees the confusion on Edward's face so she stops and smiles.

"Edward, your outburst today, it wasn't like the others. This one, it was to protect me, in a roundabout way, of course. You wanted me to go, but not because you were pushing me out, but because you wanted to save me from all this. No one's ever written about SC like that before. You were trying to be a martyr, Edward. Now that we know that, we can move on with that knowledge and I can continue to push you."

He nods, and yawns, lying back down. "Can we go back to sleep, Bella? I'm still sleepy." He stretches his hands up over his head, noticing for the first time that his stitches are out. "They're gone!" He smiles, looking at Bella with big doe eyes. "They're out?"

"Yep," Bella says proudly. "It's been a month now and when Carlisle checked the bandages, he found that they were ready to be out. Now, all we have to do is wait for your hand to heal, and all of the physical reminders of this condition will be gone. I mean, except the scars, but those will fade with time."

Edward smiles and pulls Bella close, so close that she's practically on top of him, her leg resting between Edward's. "Bella," he whispers, his breath brushing against her cheek. "May I kiss you?"

Bella nods, a smile breaking out over her face, and says, "Of course you can, Edward. Of course you can."

So he does. He closes the distance between them and tightens his hold around her, his hands looped around her waist, meeting at the small of her back. "I love you, Isabella Swan. I swear to you, I'm going to get better," he tells her before pressing his lips to hers. "I'm going to get better and prove to you, once and for all, that I'm really head over heels in love with you."

She smiles into the kiss and nods, weaving her hands into his messy hair.

"For now, it's enough just to believe," she tells him softly. "Right or wrong, I love you, too."

He pulls back, his smile matching hers, "It could never be wrong to feel what I feel for you, Bella."

She knows she shouldn't, but she agrees. Tomorrow is another day, and now that they've got this new bit of knowledge, they can move on.

They're one step closer to recovery. One step closer than anyone has ever been before.

--------

a/n: this project is kind of my _baby_. The term "Superman Complex" is completely my own fabricated diagnosis. I have no medical background. Special thanks to _**the -glory-days**_, as _always_, for kicking me in the ass every time I stop writing. Updates will be few and far between, but because they're so much longer than my other chapter updates, I hope that's alright with you guys.

**Reviews are appreciated. I'd love to hear your feedback :]**


	11. Chapter 11

Edward Cullen is a rock star in the biggest band of the decade. He's America's "It Boy," but he's still unhappy. Will Bella be in time to save him? AH AU

Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer created **Twilight**; I'm just toying around with her characters.

----

_Sup Journal, it's me, "Peppermint Patty", are you there?_

_The last few days have been really difficult. More difficult than I could have imagined a month ago. "Charlie Brown" is withdrawing from me again. He's not talking to me about what happened the day of the beach, and it's like he's resorting to ignoring me again. He's always close, always attached to me in some way, but it's not the same. _

_A month ago, "Charlie Brown's" father told me, "I can't let you stay unless you completely understand the reality of your decision." Right now, I don't think I ever thought it could be like this. I thought maybe I'd develop a crush, do what I had to, and bingo bango, I would be out of this joint… ok, maybe not exactly bingo bango, but…. Not __**this**__._

_I talked to "Charlie Brown's" father, and he said that there's nothing we can do except for wait. I'm just afraid he's going to crack under all of this pressure. I haven't talked to "Marcie" lately, and I really miss her. I need to make the call, but with all of this stress, she'll know something's wrong, and start asking questions._

_For now,_

_Peppermint Patty_

So Bella isn't lying when she says things changed. Edward started reverting back to "Child Like" Edward, holding her hand all the time, asking for permission, afraid of his own shadow. Bella continues to try to break him away from that, trying to hold him close without coddling him, but it's not what she was expecting. His behavior shift is completely unexpected for her. And after eight days, Bella begins to doubt herself.

The only time Edward's ever semi-normal, is in the practice room. Bella watches as he fights with himself over chords, soft guitar, something new, something Bella hasn't heard yet, at any rate. Every now and then, Bella will catch snippets of lyrics as he strums, "_Burned in my skin" _ and "_her heart combats"_ When he begins to quiet down, as the new sounds form a solid stopping point, Bella sighs, loud enough for Edward to look at her.

"Maybe Esme was right," she tells Edward, looking up at him from the drum stool. "Maybe I pushed you too hard, Edward."

It's quiet for a minute, and Bella rubs at the back of her neck nervously. She can feel the blood on her neck, can feel it oozing down her back, soaking her shirt. She shivers and gasps when Edward starts talking. "No Bella, no. I didn't mean to," Edward cries, putting down his guitar and resting on his knees below her. "I didn't mean to, please don't be mad at me."

"I'm not mad, Edward, it's just that… you're doing it again, you know? You're deflecting, and even Carlisle doesn't know what to make of it. I'm going to have to tell Dr. Crowley about this, see if he knows what we can do. I thought maybe I was doing the right thing when I pushed you, but…"

"No, Bella, don't call him. He doesn't understand, Bella. He doesn't get me. He doesn't get _us._"

"I don't know what else to do, Edward," Bella sighs, irritated with herself. "I obviously pushed you too far, and a week later, you're still the same."

"What can I do about it, Bella? I'm scared, and I don't want you to go. Please don't be mad," he tells her, his voice soft and petulant, like a child.

"Tell me what you're feeling, god dammit! You can't keep hiding from me! You promised," she exclaims, finally succumbing to the pressure. "I've waited for you, tried to let you tell me on your own, but you haven't – won't. I need you to trust me, Edward."

A knock on the door interrupts them, Jasper coming in, smiling awkwardly. "Sorry Bean, Edward, but Esme wants to know if you're ready to come down for dinner."

Bella looks at Edward and rolls her eyes. He obviously isn't going to make the decision for them. She opens her mouth to tell him that they'll be down in a minute but doesn't get the chance.

"No, start without us, Jasper."

Bella raises her eyebrows in surprise and crosses her arms over her chest. "We'll be down in a bit, Jazz, go ahead and eat without us," she confirms, waiting for him to leave. "And stop calling me 'Bean', you know I hate when Emmett does it."

Jasper snickers on his way out, says, "Whatever you say, Bean," and closes the door behind him.

"You didn't have to be so rude, Edward. He just got back, and wasn't here for your outburst, he doesn't understand what happened."

"He looks at me funny," Edward murmurs, looking down at his lap. "He looks at me like I'm going to blow up at him."

"Are you? Because I sure as _fuck_ don't know what to expect from you anymore."

Edward looks hurt, and immediately, Bella regrets her harsh tone. She sighs and rolls her eyes, moving to the ground in front of him. "Edward, baby, you _have to_ tell me what's going on with you. You have to tell me where your head is. You have to."

"I just…" he takes a deep breath. When he looks back up, his eyes are warm and vulnerable. Bella knows immediately that 'child like' Edward is gone; back is the Edward she knows and fell in love with. "When I woke up, and we talked about the progress, I felt so overwhelmed, Bella. I mean, I attacked you, I yelled at you and accused you of things I knew weren't true, and then you left. You left and I thought I'd never see you again. When I did see you again, I was so angry with you for staying, and then… and then you were still there when I woke up and you looked at me like I hung the moon. I _hurt_ you."

"You were trying to save me," she counters, shaking her head and palming his cheek. "You're a good man, Edward Cullen, you're just confused, but we're going to get through this."

"After we talked, and you told me about the progress, I still felt so overwhelmed. Like, instead of the news being positive, I started to think that I'd just let you down again, and I… it hurt thinking about it, Bella. I think about how I hurt you and…"

"I may not have known the severity of the situation when I got involved, but I knew that it wouldn't be easy, Edward. You can't think about anything except the future. If you keep looking back, you'll never get better."

For the first time in a full week, Edward looks at Bella with a soft smirk, his eyes light and happy. "How can you tell me things like that, Bella? How do you get me to believe you so easily?"

"It's a gift," she grins, winking at him before she leans in to kiss him. It's the first kiss they've shared since he started deflecting again. Bella sighs contentedly into the kiss and pulls back before it can expand into anything else.

"Why'd you pull away?" Edward whines, leaning back in to kiss her again. "Come back."

"No," she smiles, standing up and stretching her back. "Not until you talk to your family, Edward. No more kisses until we clear the air. Poor Jasper and Alice feel like outsiders and they're your best friends."

"_You're_ my best friend."

"Nice try," she laughs, rolling her eyes. "Let's go get dinner."

Edward groans, but Bella helps him up and leads him out of the practice room and into the hallway. Before she knows what's happening, Edward's picking her up, practically throwing her over his shoulder, and running down the stairs, laughter loud between the two of them.

Everyone at the dinner table looks up at the two of them, and Bella laughs even harder at their faces. Alice looks like it snowed on Christmas, Esme and Rosalie look concerned, and Jasper and Emmett are fist bumping. Carlisle just looks relieved. When the two of them get to their chairs, they finally stop laughing and sit down.

"Anything you'd like to share with the class, Jelly Bean?" Emmett asks, wiggling his eyebrows.

Bella laughs and shrugs her shoulders, "Not really. Rosalie and Alice told me not to tell you about our sexy lingerie pillow fights."

Rosalie and Alice start laughing loudly, caught off guard for a second, but then Rosalie comes back with, "Oh yeah, Al, you missed a great one this week. We wore the edible bras."

Alice, not missing a beat, groans and says, "Guys, you promised you'd wait!"

Bella laces her fingers between Edward's while the rest of the group continues to laugh and banter back and forth. Eventually, Edward squeezes her hand and Bella quiets everyone down.

"Edward has something he wants to tell everyone," Bella announces. Carlisle looks surprised, but everyone else just stays quiet, waiting.

"Well," he starts, clearing his throat. "I wanted to apologize for last week." He looks at Emmett and Carlisle, and Bella smiles, suddenly proud like a mother bear. "I really lost it, and I could have seriously hurt Bella. I want to thank you for trying to stop me, Em. I put you in a really tough spot, and you handled it. Mom, Rose, thanks for cleaning up my mistakes," he says softly. "I'm sorry I wrecked that mirror, Mom, I know you really liked it."

"It's nothing, Edward," Esme says, waving her hand dismissively.

"No, it's not _nothing_. It was yours, and I was selfish and ruined it. I just want to get better, and breaking things like I'm on a warpath isn't the way to do that. After last week's incident, I guess I just shut down. I mean, it was a lot to process, and the thought of failing again, or hurting Bella, and all of you, I just. I couldn't process it.

"I'm gonna keep trying, I'm going to work at it until Dr. Crowley tells me I'm cured."

Bella doesn't want to, but she starts thinking about how exactly he'll make that determination. She pushes that thought from her mind and does her best to keep listening to Edward as he talks with his family.

"So from now on, I'm going to try to be open, not just with Bella, but with everyone, you know?"

There's a not-so-awkward silence between everyone for a while, as everyone begins eating again. Esme looks absolutely relieved, as does Carlisle, and while Alice looks like she's got more questions, she stays quiet… everyone does really, until Jasper says, "So, edible bras, huh?"

Bella looks to Rosalie and after a brief pause; they both laugh loudly, shaking their heads at Jasper's subject change.

*

The next morning, Bella starts up her laptop and signs into her email so that she can finally talk to Angela. She know she's in for an e-lashing, knows she should have called her days ago. When she sees that Angela is logged in, she immediately opens a window and types.

**Isabella:** Hi Angie!**  
Angela: ** Hey stranger, you're lucky you caught me, I was about to call in the big guns. I'm not about to let my BFF go MIA for more than a week. WTF happened to every day? **  
Isabella:** I know! I know, and I'm sorry. I'm just busier than I thought I'd be, and this last week has been hectic. Did you get my email with the pictures of the room? Its deffff not that clean anymore, but do you like what I did with it?**  
Angela: **You've always been terrible at segues… Your room is amazing! How much are you paying for rent? I mean, that view is KILLER! **  
Isabella: **IKR? So, anyway, how's work going for you? And Ben?**  
Angela: ** Sucky, and spectacular, as always! He says 'hello' and also, agrees with me that you're a mob related kidnapping victim…**  
Isabella:** oh yes, the mob definitely allows me to g-chat, yep. Oh, Louie says "How YOU doin'"**  
Angela: **I can just imagine you doing that stupid Italian accent like Joey on "Friends". I miss you, you stupid BFF abandoner. **  
Isabella: **Trust me Ang, I miss you too. You're like… sometimes I feel like you're the last link to sanity,is that weird?**  
Angela: ** What aren't you telling me, Bella?**  
Isabella:** It's complicated, Angie… I miss Arizona, and the warmth, but- oh hey, I saw Jake and Nessie. Ness looks fucking gorgeous. Fuck her man, I swear it's not fair.**  
Angela: **Shut up, you two are like Greek goddesses, and I'm like your fucking hand maid or some shit. I'm sure she looks stunning, just like you.**  
Isabella: **You and I both know (don't try to disagree) that you're fucking fiiiine, Angela. Try to deny it and I'll call Ben right now.  
**Angela:** Oh, so you can call my boyfriend, but you can't call me?**  
Isabella:** Ang….**  
Angela:** Ok, ok, sorry. I just miss you.  
**Isabella: **Ditto.**  
Angela: ** So what happened with the hottie you slept with?**  
Isabella:** We haven't s_lept_ together, we sleep next to each other**  
Angela: **ON A REGULAR BASIS? WHO THE FUCK IS THIS MAN? ARE YOU SERIOUS ABOUT THIS? IS **IT** SERIOUS? YOU'VE BEEN GONE FOR A MONTH! ARE YOU SECRETLY MARRIED? IS IT A MORMON GUY WITH THREE OTHER WIVES?**  
Isabella: **Angie, no, calm down.**  
Angela: ** CUZ I WATCH THAT SHOW, BIG LOVE. I KNOW THERE ARE SECRETS AND SHIT. IF YOU'RE NOT THE FIRST WIFE, YOU'RE A SECRET WIFE. ARE YOU A SECRET WIFE? I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW YOU WERE MORMOM!!!**  
Isabella:** I'm not. To ALLLL of the above, Angela. Shit son, you're gonna give yourself an ulcer. I'm not secretly married, I'm just seeing someone, is all.**  
Angela: **Has Charlie met him?**  
Isabella: **no.  
**Angela: **Until Charlie approves, I do not approve of your den of iniquity.  
**Isabella:** Uh, for serious?  
**Angela: **As a heart attack. Go see Charlie. Then call me. Hey, I love you, but I have to go to work. Can we talk later?  
**Isabella:** I'll call you as soon as I can. xoxo  
**Angela:** love you too, xo

"Bella?"

Closing her laptop, Bella looks over at Edward and says, "Yes?"

"Who were you chatting with?"

"My friend Angela. I miss her a lot, Edward, it's hard not talking to her, you know? I guess I didn't think about it, with everything else going on. She knows I'm lying to her, like…"

"Like Jasper and Emmett would know if I were lying?" Bella nods and smiles sadly, putting the laptop on the floor as she moves to curl into Edward again.

"I'll be alright, Edward, don't worry. Angie knows I'll tell her what I can, and we're close enough that she knows not to pry right now," she laughs, recalling a part of their chat. "She thinks I'm the fourth wife."

"The what?"

"The fourth wife, of like… a Mormon. Like, that I was married off in secret. Who knows with Angela sometimes. At first, she thought I was abducted by a mobster, and now I'm a fourth wife. It's never dull with Angela Webber."

"You really love her," Edward says softly, pushing Bella's hair out of her face. "Don't you?"

"Like she's the other half of my heart."

Edward nods, pulling Bella closer and kisses the top of her head. "I wonder what's for breakfast."

"It's early still, I doubt anyone's awake. Want to go surprise everyone and make pancakes?" Edward nods quickly and sits up.

"Can we add chocolate chips into everyone's? Can we make weird shapes?"

"Weird shapes are pretty much all I can do, Edward," Bella laughs. "I don't know how anyone can do perfect circles, mine all come out looking like aliens."

The two of them walk downstairs, talking about what they can serve with their alien pancakes, and Edward decides that he can help by making some bacon, and later, some eggs and toast. The whole house is silent, so Bella's sure that even Esme's sleeping. Edward and Bella try their damnedest to stay quiet, but after barely getting the batter together, Esme pops into the kitchen just as Edward starts serenading Bella by the stovetop with a rubber spatula. His voice is soft and rugged from the chilly morning, and when Esme enters, Bella watches her face carefully.

Yesterday, Esme was borderline angry with Bella, feeling that what Bella did to Edward was exactly what she thought it was going to be. Today, Esme's face shows nothing but love for not just Edward, but Bella too. Bella smiles at Esme and elbows Edward softly to get him to acknowledge his mother's presence. He does so briefly, still singing to Bella, but now changing his tune. He goes from his own _Twilight_ songs from their EP to something Bella never thought she'd hear from his mouth.

_You can shake an apple off an apple tree. Shake it, shake it, sugar but you'll never shake me"_ He croons into the spatula, leaning into Bella, then out, dancing around the kitchen toward Esme. "_No siree, uh huh."_ He walks behind her and holds the spatula in front of her. Bella watches as Esme shakes her head 'no' and backs away from the utensil, into Edward's chest. She laughs and sighs, relenting, just as easily as Bella would have herself, and starts to sing with him. _"I'm gonna stick like glue,"_ Esme sings, rolling her eyes. "_Stick, because I'm stuck on you."_ Bella flips the first batch of pancakes as Esme and Edward dance around the kitchen. Esme provides the backups to Edward's Elvis, as he continues to dance and sing, swaying his hips like the King. "_I'm gonna run my fingers through your long brown hair, squeeze you tighter than a grizzly bear, uh huh, yessiree, uh huh. I'm gonna stick like glue, stick because, I'm stuck on you."_

While Edward sings into his spatula, Esme dancing backup, Jasper pulls a 'Risky Business', sliding into the kitchen, stealing the spatula out of Edward's hands and starts the next chorus, all the while, Bella tries to watch the pancakes, and not die laughing. "_Hide in the kitchen, hide in the hall" _Jasper sings, his voice a little raspy from just waking up, but still perfect pitch. "I_t ain't gonna do you no good at all, cuz once I catch ya then the kissing starts. A team of wild horses couldn't tear us apart."_

At this point, Bella is putting the first batch of pancakes on the plate, pouring the second batch into the pan as the three of them sing the rest of Elvis's "Stuck on You." She wishes she had a video camera so that she could catch the first family moment since this whole ordeal, but sadly, she does not. Instead she just enjoys the three of them all dancing and singing, in their pajamas as if nothing had ever changed.

They transition from one Elvis hit to the next, and as they do, more and more of the family comes down to find out what the commotion is. Carlisle's next, right as "All Shook Up" begins, so he pulls Esme into his arms and dances with her. He sings to her, grinning wide until Jasper takes Esme into his arms and steals her away.

Edward comes up to Bella as she finishes the next set of alien pancakes, still singing the main vocals, Jasper falling into an easy harmonies for the King's Rock and Roll hits. Esme and Carlisle sing to each other. Bella pulls out a fresh pan for the eggs, the bacon and pancakes finished by the time Edward begins "Don't Be Cruel" singing into her ear. _"Please forget my past, the future looks bright ahead, don't be cruel to a heart that's true. I don't want no other lover, baby it's just you I'm thinking of_." He leans forward and pulls Bella into a sweet kiss, their first real kiss in front of everyone.

Everyone stops of course, because the family's lead singer has stopped. Bella blushes as she feels all of their eyes on her. They're all smiling and happy, but Bella hates the attention. Thankfully Alice chooses that moment to join them, wearing one of Jasper's shirts and ties, and his Wayfarer sunglasses. _"Don't stop thinking of me, don't make me feel this way. Come over here and love me, you know what I want you to say."_ She continues singing, as does Jasper, Esme, and Carlisle. Bella reaches for the eggs and cracks two into the pan, still flustered, thinking about just how _perfect_ those particular lyrics were for their situation.

Edward kisses at the side of Bella's neck, whispering a fast "I love you," and then begins to sing again, taking over the lyrics once again, as Bella finishes up the breakfast.

Pancakes, bacon, eggs, and toast ready, she's about to call for an Elvis hiatus as the song ends. They need to get Emmett and Rosalie up, and as she finishes plating the eight plates, she walks toward the kitchen entrance, stopping only when she hears, _ "You ain't nothing but a hound dog, cryin' all the time,"_ and then Rosalie and Emmett are both in the kitchen, starting up a new Elvis song to add to the Breakfast Medley. As each family member comes to retrieve their plate from the stove, the singing quiets, until everyone's sitting at the table.

"Did that really happen?" Jasper asks, laughing loudly as he relinquishes his hold on the rubber spatula. "That was the greatest thing ever."

"You're regular Von Trapp Family Singers," Bella comments, winking at Jasper as she cuts into her stack of flapjacks. The quiet musings of the table continue as everyone eats breakfast, up until Edward leans in and kisses Bella's cheek. So of course, Jasper has to comment about their earlier kiss. "Some smooch at the stove top, Jelly Bean, huh?" Bella flushes furiously, rolling her eyes at Jasper.

Esme surprises Bella by reprimanding Jasper, "Jasper, you leave them alone. We have to watch you and Alice kiss on a regular basis. You leave them be."

Bella sticks her tongue out at Jasper and finishes her breakfast. Emmett and Rosalie offer to do the dishes, and just around ten, Jasper comes down into the front room, phone to his ear, and says, "Hey, Laurent's on the phone, he wants to talk about our plans."

Bella offers to leave, so that Edward, Emmett and Jasper and talk to their manager in peace, but Edward holds her steady, keeping her next to him on the love seat. Jasper puts the phone on speaker so that everyone in the room can hear.

The four boys talk about how the canceled tour will affect them as a band, and how Laurent's hopeful to get a new song out, to placate the fans. Emmett tries to reiterate the fact that the band is on hiatus, but Laurent, who unfortunately knows the details of that hiatus, doesn't sugar coat his reply.

"_You can pretend to be on hiatus while Edward recovers, but that doesn't make money, or keep fans. Everything got covered up nice and easy like, but a new song is something you should take into consideration to make sure no one starts digging."_

Sitting there, Bella thinks that sounds awfully like a threat. "Jasper," Bella whispers, staring carefully at him, then the phone, like he should be doing something about it.

Jasper nods. "Hey, Laurent, that sounds like blackmail, and you know how we feel about shit like that."

Emmett continues Jasper's thought, "Yeah, remember how our old manager James tried to leak pictures of my wedding? You're walking on that fine line, and if you want to keep on walking it, we are definitely prepared to take action against you."

"_Guys, guys, don't be so hasty_," Bella hears him back track. _"I'm just saying you need to take your fans into consideration, even if he got high and tried to off himself._"

"Hey!" Bella gasps, unable to stop herself. "Fuck off, douche bag, you don't get a say in how or when they go back into the studio. You better start watching your words!"

Jasper and Emmett laugh, Edward smirking at Bella with a proud look on his face. She apologizes silently as Laurent scoffs in the background, murmuring about how girls always get in the way. The boys quickly end the conversation with a "We'll think about it" before hanging up.

"I'm sorry, I'm so, so sorry," Bella says immediately after the phone's disconnected. "I didn't mean to lose my temper; I just couldn't _not_, after what he said."

"It's cool, Bean, one of us would have said something if you hadn't beat us to it," Emmett laughs, patting the top of his head as he gets up. "Maybe we should do a rough cut of some acoustic songs, put 'em on iTunes during the break, like we were thinking, just in case," Emmett adds, shrugging his shoulder as he goes. Jasper and Edward shrug in response, and when Edward pulls Bella up, she curls into him almost automatically.

"Thank you for sticking up for me," Edward whispers, walking them up to his room. They lay down, for their usual nap, and as Edward drifts, Bella can't help but think about what Laurent said. _"Got high and tried to off himself_."

Edward most definitely was on something the day she found him, but it faded into the background as the whirlwind of her new life began. She'd never put any thought into it before, hadn't thought that maybe some of his reactions might have been from drugs. She knew for a fact that he was no longer using, and from what she knew about drugs, he wasn't fighting any kind of intense addiction.

She kisses Edward's forehead as she gets up to talk to Carlisle about it, not really knowing enough about drug use to make any kind of firm determination, and stops short when she sees a leather bound journal, sticking out from underneath the bed. She debates for a second whether she should look into it, but reaches for it and opens it slowly.

As she goes through it, she sees all the familiar words of her favorite songs scratched out, rewritten, and penciled in to the book in her hands. She sees "_Recumbent_ _Calm_", the lyrics "_Smile to reach your apple cheeks, fragrant rubies dress them sweetly" _written in above darkly scratched out words, and smiles, reading over the other lyrics for their other albums, smiling as she sees his elegant writing, and sharp cross outs. Each page is dated and numbered, and every so often, she comes across what looks like different versions of how each CD should be tracked. The songs are given track numbers, and then scratched out, with little notes next to them, like one that says, "Emmett's a tool and thinks the drum outro sounds better leading into this" or "One love song per every two revenge". The notes make her smile, and as she keeps turning the pages, she sees newer songs, until one, one she's never seen before. It's dated the day of the accident, and some of the words are smeared, like they'd been spilled on. The writing isn't as elegant, the script loopy and childish.

He'd titled it _"Ethereal Faith" _and as she began to read, she had to stop after the first bit, shocked.

"_Chemical reactions show me sights behind closed eyes._

_Results of neon and bright white lights plague my dreary mind and_

_Beg for the attention I never got from you._

_My outlook is unhealthy-_

_Too different to be right_

_Don't let me be alone, please_

_Be one with me tonight._

Not quite sure what she's seeing, she continues on cautiously.

_We need to be one tonight_

_You need to see me for who I really am._

_Our time is ending now – ending fast,_

_Your faith in me… failing_

_No drug delays this departure._

_Our worlds collide_

_Our time starts_

_Your faith begins anew_

_When my life ends._

_I am stagnant in death,_

_In life, now and forever."_

When her tears hit the page, she blinks hard, not sure when she'd started crying, but wipes them away as she stands up fast, closing the book loudly and sniffling, holding in the sobs she knows are right at the cusp of draining out of her. When she stands, she sees Edward wake up, his eyes staring at her curiously.

"Bella?"

She sees his eyes dart from her to the book, and when she shakes her head, he says her name again, desperately this time. "_Bella_."

She shakes her head, crying in earnest now, and runs from the room, calling for Carlisle loudly. When his study door opens, Bella flies into his arms, the book tucked between them as she cries. Edward follows behind her, begging for her to forgive him, but she just keeps crying.

At this point, Bella can hear everyone in the hallway, all wondering what's going on, no one knowing for sure except for Edward. "Bella, please, please, don't leave me, I'm sorry, Bella, please."

Carlisle tightens his hands around Bella, and when he does, she sighs, her tears stuttering. She takes a deep breath and tries to calm herself and shakes her head. "I'm not leaving, Edward," she says into Carlisle's chest. "I just need a minute."

Edward whimpers, crumpling in on himself, right there in the hallway. Carlisle tells everyone to clear out, just for a while, so that he and Bella can talk. Bella is grateful for Carlisle's calm demeanor, but she can't just turn away from Edward like this. She hands Carlisle the book and turns toward Edward, kneeling down in front of him, her hands cupping his cheeks.

"Edward, baby, _why_?" she says, her bottom lip trembling. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I was afraid," he tells her. "I didn't want you to see it, 'cuz you'd see me, and I didn't want you to see me like that."

She leans forward, her wet cheeks bumping his as she kisses him. Her salty tears fall as she presses her mouth to his desperately. "I will _never_ stop believing in you," she tells him. "I _love_ you." She leans her forehead into his and stares at him, seeing him through watery eyes.

Kissing him once more, she stands and turns back to Carlisle and the study.

---

a/n: no offense to Mormons or mobsters was intended for this, or any other chapter of _Superman _Complex.

a/n 2: this project is kind of my _baby_. The term "Superman Complex" is completely my own fabricated diagnosis. I have no medical background. Special thanks to _**the -glory-days**_, as _always_, for kicking me in the ass every time I stop writing. Updates will be few and far between, but because they're so much longer than my other chapter updates, I hope that's all right with you guys.

--

**TWITTER: **cevuplay  
**FORMSPRING:** /cevuplay

**Reviews are appreciated. I'd love to hear your feedback :]**


	12. Chapter 12

Edward Cullen is a rock star in the biggest band of the decade. He's America's "It Boy," but he's still unhappy. Will Bella be in time to save him? AH AU

Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer created **Twilight**; I'm just toying around with her characters.

----

_Hypocrite: (noun) 1. A person who gives into hypocrisy  
[[__**hip**__-uh-krit]]_

_Hypocrisy: (noun) 1. The false professing of qualities such as virtue, piety, etc.  
[[hi-__**pok**_-_ruh-see]]_

_Journal, I've done it. I've done what I shouldn't have done. I'm the epitome of a hypocrite right now. I mean, "Charlie Brown's" been trying, and he has an issue, and I don't have any excuse at all for how I've behaved. It's been a week now, since I found the 'poetry book' and even though I feel bad about it, I… I can't not feel the way I do. I can see why "Charlie Brown" had decided to deflect; it's much easier than being truthful._

_He's in the den right now, with "Linus" working on something creative, but I can't bring myself to find interest in it right now. I'm so… drained. I talked to "Charlie Brown's" father on the day I found the book, and he was just as shocked as I was to see the words on the page. We'd both forgotten something crucial about _that_ day, and when he read the words, he came to the same conclusion. I'm scared, Journal, afraid that everything I've been brought here to do is impossible._

_This is why "Charlie Brown" hid the book from me. He was afraid I would see him, really see him, and I did, and what I saw… well, it scared the shit out of me. I mean, I saw him that day, I saw what happened, but seeing why, seeing his thoughts mere minutes before he did what he did…._

_Journal, I'm afraid I won't be able to help him. Don't tell anyone, ok?_

_-Peppermint Patty_

Bella tries her hardest not to let her mind wander, tries to pretend that everything is ok, that she didn't read the words on the page like she did.

"_I am stagnant in death / In life, now and forever_," the words haunt her like his blood down her shirt. "_Chemical reactions show me sights behind closed eyes." _When she'd read that, Laurent's words came screaming to the forefront of her mind, glaring and unmistakable.

She doesn't remember Dr. Crowley saying anything about drugs when they were in the hospital, doesn't remember hearing anything about the cocaine that was rushing through his veins that day, the day he took a blade to his wrists and tried to end it all.

She blinks out of her reverie when there's a light knock on the door. Alice smiles softly at her, just as Bella shuts her laptop, a little too quickly.

"Journal?" Alice asks, coming to sit down on Bella's bed, crossing her legs underneath her.

"Yeah, just, you know, what Carlisle told me to," Bella says, shrugging.

"You know you can talk to me, right Bella? I'm here for you, and… I know something's up, ok? I can _feel_ it, but I don't want to push you."

Bella waves her off, pulling out her biggest, (fakest), smile, and winks. "I'm fine, Ali, I promise. I just get melancholy after talking to Angie, that's all."

Bella sees Alice's unconvinced face, but slides her laptop onto the bedside table and gets up, stretching. "Want to go downstairs, take a walk or something?"

Alice sighs but nods, and Bella reaches out to link arms with her. "You never did tell me about your trip to Southern California, Alice. How was it?"

"Boring, actually," Alice says, looking at her nail beds. "I find I rather enjoy your company, my dear, well, when you're not lying to me that is."

"Alice, I'm-"

"Save the shit for Edward," Alice interrupts, eyebrow defined, challenging Bella to say something. "He believes your charade, and that's fine for him because he's better than he's ever been, but you and I both know that whatever the hell happened last week affected you more than you let on."

Bella sighs this time, trying not to let her carefully scripted façade fall by the wayside after one comment from Alice. "I'm fine, Alice. Drop it."

As they walk down the stairs, Bella looks down at her feet, the Ugg slippers soft and warm against the cool wood flooring. She's comfortable enough now with Alice to wear the expensive clothes like she ought to, proud that her figure allows her to look as good as she does. The high waist shorts and gauzy white top are soft and light, perfect for lounging for the day, and she can't help but hate feeling like she's betraying Alice a little more each time she says she's fine.

When they pass the den, Bella hears a snatch of lyrics from Edward's lips, a brief "_cliché as it sounds, my life is_..." and then Alice is pulling her away, out through the kitchen onto the back patio where Rosalie and Esme are lounging.

"Bella, it's good of you to join us," Rosalie says, her eyebrow arched similarly to Alice's earlier.

"Thanks, Rose," Bella says softly, moving to sit next to Esme, thinking perhaps, that if she sits there, she won't have to endure the torment of Alice and Rosalie. Maybe Esme will be a neutral zone.

"Bella, sweetheart, you know you can be honest with us," Esme says quietly, patting Bella's hand in a maternal way. _So much for a neutral zone_, she thinks, rolling her eyes.

"Seriously, all of you, I'm fine, alright? We can't all be chipper all the time," Bella groans. "Really, perfectly fine."

Bella sees Rosalie open her mouth, but Alice holds up her hand, "I already told her to save the shit, but she's adamant about keeping her 'I'm fine' story."

"I _am_ fine, Alice," Bella says, looking at her harshly. "Seriously, let it go. I said I'm fine, so believe that I'm fine until I say differently, which I won't."

The back door opens, and slides closed. "Leave her be," Emmett says, nudging Bella in the shoulder. "I think she's doing fine. Shit, I toured with the dude and didn't know he was doing lines between shows."

"Emmett!" Bella gasps, standing from her chair quickly. "Crowley says it was a one-time thing!"

"Jelly Bean, coke isn't a one-time thing kind of drug," Emmett says sadly.

"It could have been for Edward, Emmett. You don't know anything."

She sees Emmett look to Rosalie and then shrugs.

"Bella, are you sure you're-" Before Esme can finish, Bella sucks in a quick breath and screams, "I said I was fine!"

She doesn't even turn around to look at the stunned group before she hurries through the back door and runs through the den and up the stairs. As she goes, she faintly hears the sharp sounds of a missed chord, and then, before she slams the door to her room, she hears Edward's voice calling for her.

Sliding down the closed door to the bathroom she shares with Edward, she lets out a shaky breath, her bottom lip trembling.

"Edward, just leave her be. She needs a minute," she hears Carlisle say.

"What's going on? What happened, Bella? Please, baby, talk to me," Edward says, his voice closer, up against the door.

"Let her have some time, Edward."

"Time with what? What's wrong with her? Bella, what's wrong?"

She waits for Carlisle to tell him, waits for _someone_ to tell him, but she doesn't hear it, doesn't hear the words come.

"Bella," Edward whispers, she can hear him directly on the other side of the door. "Talk to me, baby, please."

She's quiet for a long minute, trying to quell her tears, stop them before they start.

"How long did you do drugs, Edward? How long?"

She hears his sharp intake of breath. "Just, just once," he says, confirming her beliefs. "One of the roadies gave it to me because I'd been so fucking depressed," he tells her. "He said it would have cheered me up a little, gotten me out of my funk, so I-"

"Why? Who were you writing about?"

"It was… it was more of a conversation," he says. "Bella, please let me in. Let me tell you to your face, please."

She wipes at her tears and unlocks the door, sliding out of the way, up against the tub. He comes in quietly, looking so ashamed, and so upset that Bella almost wants to tell him that she's fine and that she's sorry.

She doesn't.

When she doesn't say anything, he sits at her feet and places his hands over hers on her knees. "I was trying to get God to listen to me, Bella," he murmurs. "I couldn't stop feeling the way I was, and then I did the lines, and…. Everything seemed so much worse. I wanted God to know how fucked up I felt, so I wrote it down. Bella, please, don't look at me like that."

She blinks, unaware that her face is anything other than blank. "Huh?"

"Like you'll never love me like you did eight days ago," he whispers. "I noticed, baby, I saw your eyes change, I… but you were ok, you said you were ok, and we talked about it, and everything was ok again."

For the first time, Bella tells the truth. "I'm not ok, Edward. I'm not fine. I don't know if…"

"Don't say it, please don't say it. I don't think I can handle it."

She shakes her head and takes a deep breath. "I don't think I'm the right person to help you, Edward. I'm so afraid of failing you, and all I want is for you is to be happy, for you to have this behind you, and I think I'm the last person who should be helping you."

Edward gasps, pulling his hands back. "No, Bella, no!" He pauses a moment, waiting for her to say that she's going to stay, anything, going to keep trying, she assumes, but when she doesn't, his eyes flicker. "You're _mine!"_ he growls, pushing her back into the bathtub, hands tight on her shoulders as his lips crash into her own.

She doesn't pull away, doesn't even try. She just cries, kissing him back with everything she has. She brings her arms up around his shoulders and digs her fingers into the material of his shirt, grasping at it with all her strength. His arms loosen their hold, move from the tops of her shoulders to under her arms as he pulls her onto his lap, squeezing her tightly to him. She can feel every outline of muscle from their proximity, can feel the wetness of her tears, maybe his tears on her cheeks.

When he sniffles and pulls back, he gasps out, and as she thought, the tears weren't hers alone. "Bella, don't leave me," he whispers onto her lips, foreheads touching. "I can't do this without you."

He pulls her in again, kissing her fiercely. She watches him communicate his fears to her through his actions, and as his lips trail from her own down her neck, down the material of her white gauzy shirt, she can't stop the tears that fall from her eyes. "I_ love _you, Bella, you can't just leave," he murmurs into her chest. "Let me show you how much, please," he begs.

As she doesn't stop him, Edward continues the trail his lips began with his hands, his sandpaper fingers burning as they pull apart the neckline of her shirt, pulling if off her shoulders and letting it slide down her torso. He kisses the newly exposed skin softly, pulling at the taught straps of her bra, moving them out of his path, letting them fall limply down her arms. Her tears fall slowly down her cheeks, down her chin, and off onto the top of Edward's head as he kisses down her cool flesh, his hands frantic with need, pulling at her, prodding her, squeezing her tightly.

Her own hands are frantic as well, searching, feeling, gripping for anything she can hold onto, anything tangible from him as his hands reach for the button of her shorts. She grasps the hem of his shirt and pulls heavenward. It comes up and off quickly and easily as if it hadn't been there in the first place. His wet eyes meet hers briefly, blinking, and then his lips are on hers again, their skin so close. As he kisses her, his arms reach back and pull at the clasp under her shoulder blades, releasing her body from its confines.

It falls to the floor easily, just as Bella grips at the zipper of his jeans, pulling them away and down. He lifts her, grips her tightly and slides out of his jeans. They fall to the edge of their consciousness as his lips sear her own, biting and licking and gasping in quiet cries against the cold tile of the bathroom.

"Tell me you love me," he begs, his lips sliding down the line of her jaw, up toward her ear. "Tell me you love me, Bella, _please_." His arms tighten against her as he pleads. "Fuck, Bella, _lie_ if you have to, please just say it."

His hands fight with her shorts, ripping them harshly away from her body and onto the floor, leaving them both in just their underwear, their heavy breathing echoing off the walls.

She lets out a sob as she opens her mouth, her tears fresh and hot on her cheeks. "Edward," she murmurs, pulling him tighter, flush against her naked chest. "Oh god, Edward, I love you so much," she cries, kissing him everywhere her lips can reach.

His hands trail down her skin, his own tears clouding his vision as he pulls at the waistband of her panties, easing them down her legs along with his own. "Bella, I need you. Please believe me baby, I love you."

He bites at her bottom lip, pulling at it roughly as he kisses her, his hands gripping her hips tightly as he sniffles. She continues to cry, her arms around his neck as he holds her, her hand fisted in his hair. "I love you," she whispers through shaky breaths. "I love you too, Edward. I love you enough to let you go, let you get help."

His next moves are forceful and frenzied, he grips her waist tighter in his palms and sheathes himself inside of her, connecting them as one. "You're mine, Bella, please," he moans. She cries out, her voice reverberating off the walls loudly, back at their joined bodies. He doesn't pause, he doesn't wait, or ask her if she's alright, he holds her close, one hand splayed on her back, between her shoulder blades, the other tight on her waist as his hips move frantically, his body thrumming for release.

"You can't leave me," he whispers, biting at her neck, the same spot he bit all that time ago in the kitchen. It hurt then as it hurts now, a painful reminder of how much she loves him. His tongue darts to soothe the sting his teeth's wake. His lips suck on the skin violently as his lower half pistons into her quickly, holding her tightly in his hands as she cries.

"Edward," she gasps, her fingers digging into his scalp as her body reacts to his, she stretches out her neck to the side, giving him more room to lavish the skin with attention as she trails her hand down to his chest, over his heart, feeling it hammering at his ribcage.

"Oh god, Bella," he groans, the hand at her back scratching down her spine, nails digging into her flesh as his body finally seizes in release. "Oh god."

She nods, panting, her hips rolling into his as she finds her own culmination of emotions, pulling at his hair, pulling him up to kiss her. He does, licking into her mouth swiftly. She can feel what he's trying to tell her, can feel his need in more than one way. "Edward," she murmurs. "I'm so sorry," she says, her voice shaky from her tears. "I'm so, so sorry."

"Just tell me you're staying, please. I love you so much."

"I can't," she whispers, exhausted now, physically, mentally, and emotionally. "Edward, you need someone to help you who isn't as emotionally involved." Her excuse is breathy, a lie, and so far from what Bella really wants that she can't believe it's coming out of her mouth.

He holds her close, still not letting her go as she thinks about what she's just done. He rubs his fingers down her spine, and she can feel the tears slide down her shoulder. "You can't leave me," he says. "I need you."

"Need me like you needed the drug? Like you needed to end it all?"

"No," he murmurs. "So much more than that, Bella. Different than that. I need you like I need to fucking breathe."

That starts her tears again, her body so drained that she doesn't even have the will to remove herself from his lap, from his sweaty grasp. She doesn't have to though, he moves them both, standing with ease, and holding her to him as she uncurls her legs to stand. He doesn't let her go as he starts the shower, and as they wait for the water to warm, Bella stares at his chest, dripping from their physical intimacy, her palms flat against his torso.

He lifts her into the tub, helps her stay on her feet and just holds her there with him. She continues to cry against him, feeling so weak in his embrace as he takes care of her. The sponge that she once used to wash him, now takes its turn to cleanse her, sliding down her shoulder blades, past the reddened crescents on her back from Edward's fingers, down her legs and back up her front, from thighs to neck.

She watches him love her in a completely different way. She watches him covet her, sees the desire to protect her in his eyes, despite the fact that she's told him she's leaving anyway.

The tears finally slow, his own a memory, as he rinses them both off and turns off the taps. She jolts out of her daze as he wraps a towel around her body and rubs her slowly, drying her body with a softness she can't remember ever feeling, a tender lovingness that she remembers from her mother two decades ago.

"Let's rest," he tells her, his voice monotone and soft, resigned. "Which pajamas do you want to wear?"

She doesn't answer, instead, pulls his shirt from the ground and settles it over her head, smoothing it down over her waist. He smiles softly, and pulls on his boxers before they walk out of the bathroom and into Edward's bedroom. Together, they curl into the bed and into each other, a newfound closeness that neither want to rid themselves of.

Not now.

Not ever.

"I don't want to go," she confesses. "Edward, I don't want to go, but I can't stay. You'll never get better if I stay. I _need_ you to get better."

"I am getting better," he argues. "Bella, I'm getting so much better."

"How do I know? Yes, you're more communicative, you're more open and you can speak to your relatives, but what about Jacob and Ness? You passed out because we went out. And my father, we still have to meet my father. What about that?"

"We will," he promises. "We'll go tomorrow if that's what it will take to make you stay. Bella, you _can't_ just leave. We'll visit with your father, we'll go back to Jacob and Ness, and we'll go to the fucking mall in Seattle if that will prove how much I need you. Please, promise me you'll try."

"I _am_ trying," she cries. "Edward, I'm trying so fucking hard. I just. Fuck, when Angela and I were in college, one of our best friends, Alec, he-" she doesn't finish, she just curls further into him sobs into his naked chest. "Angie found him in his dorm room, the doctors said it was too late, that it looked like he'd been using for months. He was my best friend and I couldn't save him. He _died_, Edward. You can't die. You can't fucking… you just. I _can't_. I couldn't save him, and I can't save you."

"You already have, Bella. You save me every morning when I wake up and forget where I am. You're there, in every single thought. I'm a better man, a better brother, a better son because of you."

"I don't want to lose you," she confesses to him. "I don't want you to fall out of love with me, I don't want you to forget me."

"Never. It will never happen. Do you understand me?"

She doesn't respond, but she slips her hands around his waist and pulls at his hips until he's laying over her, his weight atop her hips, weighing her down. "Stay," he whispers, her hands still over his back as he rearranges himself above her.

"Forever."

*

"We slept together," she says into her knees, sitting in the chair in Carlisle's study. "In the bathroom. I didn't mean to, we didn't intend to, but it just happened."

Carlisle looks up from his book, for the first time in thirty minutes, and raises his eyebrow. "Is that what you came in here to tell me?" She grimaces, afraid and so unsure. She nods and looks back down at her knees, afraid to look at him.

She's been sitting in his office for the last hour, not saying anything, just sitting there, gathering her courage. She's no braver now then she was an hour ago, and it's even worse, now, with Carlisle's almost disappointed look.

"You were upset," he says, almost in an understanding sort of way. "Something in your past that Edward's actions made you confront, right?" Bella nods. "Something terrible that you blamed yourself for. Something you didn't want to repeat with Edward so you got scared, closed yourself off and decided it would be better to just leave."

"No, not just leave," Bella says, shaking her head fiercely. "Edward needs to recover one-hundred percent from this Carlisle. If I stay, he'll never fully recover, you know it too, don't you?"

She sees his eyes flicker down to his book, then back up again. He nods slowly, and Bella sighs.

"While he is making significant progress, he's going to plateau again, and the next time he does, he'll be like a ticking time bomb, waiting for something to set him off. If the bomb detonates, there will be nothing to salvage from the wreckage."

"How do you know?" she whispers, eyes wide with horror.

"I've been discussing Edward's case with a few colleagues of mine. Dr. Salazar, she's a world renowned psychologist. She's got more knowledge on Superman Complex cases than both myself and Tyler Crowley combined. She was in Ireland, working with a couple there, whose son was diagnosed with SC. She's given me her input, wanted me to run it by you, and Edward."

"What can I do?" Bella asks. "Please, I need to know he's going to be ok." She pauses for a second and looks up at him. "I don't think I can stay away, Carlisle. I don't think I can bear to be away from him now."

"Carmen said that might be an issue, but I have to tell you now, Bella, she says that falling in love with the 'savior' figure is common. I need you to know that before we go on. That's what she thinks now, I haven't changed my mind on the subject. I think he'd have loved you with or without this set back."

"She thinks it's just because of the SC?" He nods at her question. She continues, "What can we do to avoid the plateau, Carlisle?"

"Carmen thinks it's best if we bring in a specialist to work with the two of you. She thinks it's very beneficial for you to be part of his full recovery, but thinks that a specialist is also necessary for this. I'd like very much to bring her here."

Bella nods solemnly.

"Now Bella, this has nothing to do with you. We love you, even if you're sleeping with Edward. I'm not upset for you for being in love, this isn't a punishment. It will help you both, you know that right?"

She looks up at him slowly, "Really? You aren't angry with me?"

He laughs. "Bella, it was inevitable that you two got intimate, we've all been waiting for it to happen, ever since that kiss in the kitchen, we could all feel it building."

She watches as he shakes his head fondly and stands up, closing the book he's been looking at. "You're so cute when you're worried," he tells her, leaning down to kiss her forehead. "You're also part of this family, so stop worrying that we'll kick you out. You're here to stay."

She smiles up at him and practically jumps out of the chair to hug him. "Thank you so much, Carlisle. I think having your friend here will help. I won't feel so pressured, and maybe Edward can finally recover."

"That's the goal, sweetheart. Now get out of here. I hear Edward's written a new song. Esme heard a bit of it yesterday, before the big fiasco, and said it was beautiful."

"A new song?"

"Yes, I bet he'd play it for you if you asked him."

She smiles wide at Carlisle, squeezing him tight once more before she lets him go and runs from the study, down the steps and into the den, where Edward's writing in his lyric book.

She stops, leaning against the wall frame with a smile on her face. When he looks up, he takes a second to study her before he stands. She walks into the den and stands in front of him.

"You're staying," he says, and it isn't a question.

"I'm staying."

He lifts her up at the waist and twirls her in a circle, smiling so wide and happily, bigger than Bella's seen in weeks. When he puts her down, she wraps her arms around Edward's waist and kisses at his chest. "I want to hear your new song," she tells him.

"I love you," he answers, leaning over to get the book. "The music isn't ready yet, but the lyrics are done, you can read them if you want."

She takes the book in her hands and walks to the couch to sit down, him coming to sit right beside her, curling her legs over his lap. "Read them to me," she says, handing the book back to him as she curls further into him, practically sitting on his legs.

"Alright," he says softly, moving his lips to the shell of her ear. "It's called "Circuitous Heroes" and it's the first thing I've written since being back in Forks." He leans in and kisses at the bruised flesh right below her ear, the bite mark he's left on her skin. She shivers and smiles at the soft press of his lips.

"_Emotions are fleeting, they change with the wind_," he whispers. _"Her expression of disappointment is burned in my skin. When I close my eyes, I beg for her smile, but all I'm left with is my cold denial. Please forgive me for all that I've done. My existence is flawed, sure, but I'm resolute she is the one._"

Bella gasps, moving to look up at Edward, but he stops her. "Wait, it's not done," he tells her, kissing the same spot again. "There's more, so please don't say anything until I've finished, ok?" She nods.

"_Save me. I know her heart combats with her head, but believe me when I say it's her I'm to wed. Cliché as it sounds, my life is for her. My savior, my lover, my Supergirl. Father forgive me for all that I've done. I've made my mistakes, the ultimate sin. Save me Father, give me this chance. Let me have this last shot at romance."_

He pauses, taking a deep breath, his voice warm and sensual in her ear, falling over her like velvet.

"_I know her heart combats with her head, but believe me when I say it's her I'm to wed. Cliché as it sounds, my life is for her. My savior, my lover, my Supergirl_."

She waits a moment to see if there's more, and when he doesn't continue, she grins and looks up at him, seeing the nervous look in his eyes. "Well?"

"It's not exactly the same as the other Twilight songs, but it's so perfect," she grins, twisting in his lap, arms around his neck as she straddles him. The lyric book drops to the ground as Edward's hands wrap around her waist to hold her steady.

"For years, I've dreamed about you writing a song just for me," she confesses. "_Years_, Edward." He smirks at her, like the old Edward Cullen used to do during interviews.

"Yeah, well, I've been waiting my whole life for someone like you, so-"

"God, you two are so disgusting."

Bella looks up toward the doorway to see Rosalie standing there, arms crossed over her chest with a smile on her face.

"Bells, Carlisle told me to let you know that Dr. Salazar will be here next Tuesday." Bella nods, and Rosalie winks, leaving them alone again.

"Bella, who's Dr. Salazar?" Edward asks, his nose nudging her jaw bone, down toward her neck.

"Your new psychologist. Or well, our new psychologist. Carlisle thinks it will be beneficial to get a real shrink here, instead of just me."

"I don't want a new anything. I'm perfectly, incandescently happy with just you."

She rolls her eyes and pulls away from him, leaning her torso away from him. "It will be better for both of us."

"Well, we should go see your father before she gets here, right? And probably go back to Jacob's too?"

Looking at Edward, Bella just grins and leans forward, nodding as she presses her lips to his softly. "You're the first boy I've ever brought home to meet my dad, Edward."

"And the last too," he says, the smirk back on his face.

----

a/n: this project is kind of my _baby_. The term "Superman Complex" (AS USED BY ME) is completely my own fabricated diagnosis. I have no medical background. Special thanks to _**the -glory-days**_, as _always_, for kicking me in the ass every time I stop writing. Updates will be few and far between, but because they're so much longer than my other chapter updates, I hope that's all right with you guys.

--

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	13. Chapter 13

Edward Cullen is a rock star in the biggest band of the decade. He's America's "It Boy," but he's still unhappy. Will Bella be in time to save him? AH AU

Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer created _Twilight_; I'm just toying around with her characters.

----

The week flies by for Bella, with all of the upcoming changes, she does her best just to keep Edward at the level he is now, fearing what Carlisle had said about the silent bomb just exploding. The two of them make plans to go see Bella's father that weekend, just days before Dr. Salazar comes to evaluate them.

After Bella had given Carlisle the 'ok' to bring in Dr. Salazar, he called her immediately, and later that day, he met with Bella and explained what would be occurring.

"Bella," Carlisle begins. "She'll come in about two weeks, just to do a brief evaluation first. Then, after she's collected her notes and comes up with a plan, she'll come back and be staying with us."

"So, she'll be here for the day, to observe us, and then leave, and then come back? What a waste of a flight," Bella laughs. "Why doesn't she just stay?"

"Carmen thinks that if she exposes herself to Edward for too long a period in the beginning that he'll reject her. She thinks it best, and I agree that he meet her, and then have her depart. That way, you can find out how Edward likes her, at a later time, discuss with Carmen on how to reintroduce her on a more permanent basis."

She and Edward had talked about it briefly, on the couch the day he decided he wanted to meet her father, but since then, Bella hasn't brought it up. She was trying to avoid it. In fact, she's pretty sure the first thing Carmen will tell her is that she needs to stop being romantically involved with Edward. It's logical, and most definitely the smartest thing she could do to help him.

*

Finally, the day of the lunch with Bella's father arrives, and right from the start, Bella knows it's going to be the worst day ever. She wakes up gasping for breath, on the verge of a panic attack because of a nightmare she's just had.

As quietly as she can, she crawls out of bed, careful not to wake Edward, and sneaks off to the bathroom where she climbs into the bathtub, head in her hands, trying to stop panicking.

Eventually, she gets out of the tub and goes back to their bed. She pulls out her laptop to record it all in her journal.

_Hi Journal,_

_I woke up this morning with the worst feeling in my stomach. I dreamed that "Charlie Brown" had finally come to his senses and decided he was going to marry the red headed girl instead of staying with me. He'd done everything we'd agreed upon, but that made it so much worse. He was so honest with me about it, telling me straight out that he didn't love me anymore, and that he was sorry – wanted me in his life still- and that he was in love with someone else._

_The dream flashed forward to a wedding, with "Charlie Brown" at the altar and me by his side, acting as his "best man" smiling sadly through tears that I'd passed off as 'joyous' to him. I could see "Lucy" and "Sally" in the congregation, looking how I felt: betrayed and broken hearted. "Linus" and "Schroder" were behind me, being groomsmen, and then the little red headed girl walked out, following behind her beautiful bridesmaids, toward "Charlie Brown" grinning wickedly, like she knew how I felt and didn't care._

"_Charlie Brown" looked back at me as the little red headed girl got to him, one final time, and I couldn't help it. I watched myself run down the aisle in tears, sobbing and carrying my broken heart in my hands. "Charlie Brown" didn't stop the ceremony after I ran, and the little red headed girl yelled 'carry on' to the preacher as "Sally" and "Lucy" followed after me._

_The dream skipped ahead again, this time a few years down the road, with "Charlie Brown" calling me, telling me that he and the little red headed girl were expecting a girl and he wanted to name her after me. The little red headed girl pretended to be happy, but as soon as she got me on the phone, I could see her face, rolling her eyes as if I was in the room with her, despite the 3,000-mile difference. "Charlie Brown" came back onto the phone and told me he needed me to come to the birth, and then the christening, and then be the godparent, and I didn't say no because I was too in love with him to let him go._

_It flashed forward again to when I was a older, sick with cancer, still heartbroken on my death bed for "Charlie Brown" who was nowhere to be found, despite his good health. "Sally" and "Linus" came in, apologizing, saying that "Charlie Brown" wasn't coming. That he and the little red headed girl were vacationing and couldn't be pulled away._

_I shot awake, on the verge of a panic attack. _

_That's all for now,_

_Peppermint Patty _

"Bella? Why are you awake so early?" Edward asks, stretching out on the bed. He yawns as he wipes the sleep out of his eyes. "Everything ok?"

She nods, closing the laptop. "Yeah, I just had a nightmare," she answers. "I'm alright now. Let's just go back to sleep."

He pulls her closer, wrapping his arms around her tightly. "_I'll keep you safe, sing in your ear, run my hands through your hair to get you past this nightmare,"_ he sings softly, and Bella smirks, giggling, unable to hold it in.

"You're singing me "Lullaby at Sunrise"?" she asks, shaking her head as she curls into him, pulling the blankets over the two of them.

"Do you want to keep singing?"

"No, let's just go to sleep, today's a big day for us," he says, another yawn taking over him. "I need my rest if I have to face your father."

She nods into his chest, sinks as close as she can into him, and closes her eyes, trying to shake off the feeling of dread that the nightmare had left. She feared that her theory would be proved on Monday, when Carmen got there. She feared that she was just Edward's Superman, nothing more.

On Monday, she'd figure out how to deal with it. Right now, she was going to enjoy every single second she had with him.

--

"Are you scared to meet my father?" she asks Edward, smiling wide. "He's not that bad, not really. I think you'll like him."

"But will he like me?" Edward asks, running his hand through his hair as he fixes his tie. "I mean, what if he recognizes me and tells Angela or something?"

"First, he won't recognize you, and second, is it really such a terrible thing for Angela to find out?" He walks up behind her and wraps his fingers around her hips.

She hears Edward sigh into her hair, and she knows what he's going to say. She stops him before he can tell her why it would be bad. "I know, I know. No one can know it's you. It just sucks, you know? Knowing that I can't tell anyone that I'm completely in love with you. You know?"

He grins and kisses the top of her head. "Dad thinks it's best, and I can't say I don't agree with him. He knows what's good for our family. I can't go against that just because I want the world to know how we feel right now."

The _right now_ in his sentence forces Bella back into her nightmare from earlier that morning. She sees the older version of herself laying in the hospital bed, and before she can shake the memory, Edward is hugging her tighter, telling her it's alright. She turns in his arms, holds onto him, gripping at his shoulder blades, and breathes him in.

"What's wrong, Bella? I don't know what I did to make you upset, please. I'm so sorry, Bella, please talk to me."

"It was just my dream, I remembered part of it. I can't shake the feeling and…. Just forget it, I'm alright. Now, let me go put on the clothes Alice bought me, and slip into those heels she picked up in Los Angeles."

She heads back to her room and walks into the closet, grabbing for the garment bag that Alice had gotten ready for her. The shoes are still in the box, and when she opens it, she sees the red leather of the sole and smiles, knowing exactly who made them. She grins wide, setting them aside, and slips out of her clothes and into her dress clothes. It's a pair of grey high-waisted dress shorts and a white chemise top. There's a note from Alice and Rosalie telling her to tuck the shirt in and wear her hair down, but there's nothing else there, no other tips. She's a little surprised.

After dressing and fixing her hair, she walks back into Edward's room and clears her throat to get his attention. "How do I look?"

His eyes are wide, his mouth open so big she's sure he's going to get drool on his tie. "You look…"

"If I need to put on something else, something more appropriate for my father, please tell me."

"No, no, you look incredible. I just… Holy fucking shit, Bella, you're gorgeous."

She smirks at him and leads him toward the bedroom door, down the hall and down the steps. "We're going now. You can compliment me later, Edward," she laughs, winking back at him.

Carlisle meets them at the front door. She sees him look between her and Edward, so she asks Edward to go upstairs to get her coat. He goes, seemingly unaware, and whistles as he goes.

"Thanks," Carlisle says. "I wanted to speak to you briefly. I have to tell you that I'm not sure about this. Last time he was out, he wasn't very cooperative, and this is way more important than seeing friends. If your father feels as if you are in danger, or if he feels Edward isn't right for you, he will mention it, and as a father, I think he'll mention it in front of Edward. If he does, I'm afraid of how Edward will react."

"You're not giving Edward enough credit, Carlisle. He'll be fine."

"I want to believe in him as you do. You know I just want what's best for the both of you."

"I know that," Bella smiles.

"This is a very mild sedative. I'd like it very much that you use this if he starts acting up. It won't make him fall asleep, it'll just keep him very mellow, and if the need arises, you can both leave without incident." He hands her a small plastic bag with two tablets in it.

"They will dissolve like seltzer tablets, fizz for a moment, but not much," Carlisle continues. "You can tell Edward if you'd like, I don't mind. I just don't want this outing to ruin everything for you."

"What do you mean, for me? Aren't you worried about Edward?"

"How do you think your father will react if Edward has an episode? I'm a father, Bella, I know what I would do if my only daughter was dating someone who had any kind of psychological outburst. Even at your age, I wouldn't consent to it."

Bella smiles sadly at Carlisle. He smiles back, but sighs, "I just want you to be careful. If you have any sense of him having an episode, do this. For both of you."

"You know, he might want to take these anyway," she tells him. "He's really nervous to meet my father. I'll talk to him about it on the ride there. I'm really just glad neither of us are still bandaged."

"But you are bruised."

"That's nothing new for me," Bella laughs, patting Carlisle's arm as she puts the tablets into her pocket. "I'm always bruised, somewhere."

"Hopefully, that's something Rosalie can help you with when you get back. She's a trained yoga instructor. Yoga can be soothing and helpful with equilibrium."

"Yoga? Gross," Bella groans playfully, smiling as Edward comes back down with her coat. Carlisle hands her the keys and then they leave, smiling.

The drive is a decent hour's drive, but Bella has a lot on her mind, so it's a quiet one. She and Edward listen to an iPod playlist called 'One Hundred and Eleven Classical Masterpieces' which makes the drive a calm and almost serene affair. She tries to decide whether she should tell Edward about what Carlisle's given her for him, but she's honestly worried that it will set him off, so she's apprehensive.

"Edward?" She decides it would be for the best to be honest with him. "Carlisle gave me something…for you. Something that I'm not sure you'll like, but I have to tell you, because I want us to always be honest with each other."

"What is it, Bella? I'm sure it's not that bad." Edward laughs at Bella's nervousness, and grabs for her hand. She smiles appreciatively, but doesn't continue right away.

"They're in my purse. It's a mild sedative, to help keep you stay calm. They won't knock you out, but Carlisle thinks it might help with your nerves."

"You don't think I can do this?" Edward asks, biting at his lip. She sees the look in his eyes and knows what he's feeling.

"No, it's not that I don't think you can. I just… it's a big day, Edward, and I don't want you to get overwhelmed. My father's not scary, but I know that you're nervous. I don't _want_ you to be nervous, but I understand why you are."

"If you think it's for the best, Bella, I'll take them," Edward says softly, tightening his grip on her hand. "I want to show your father that you're in good hands with me."

"I _am_ in good hands," she tells him, pulling his hand up with her own to her lips. "You're perfect for me. Everything will go fine today, if you don't want to take the pills, I'll hold onto them. If you feel anxious later, I'll give you them to you then."

"What's your father like?" Edward asks. Bella's surprised he hadn't asked sooner, but answers him just the same.

"He's a cop," she tells him, pushing her hair back. "A detective actually, in Port Angeles. He deals with a lot of low level crime and things like that. When we get to the house, he'll have his rifles out on the table to scare you. He'll be cleaning them, drinking beer, wearing a flannel and some jeans. He will also make sure you look at his badge, which will be at his hip, like a lighthouse, so he knows that _you_ know he's the boss. But don't be worried, as soon as he sees how you are with me, he'll lighten up."

"So, guns, badge, flannel, beer," Edward says, calculating. "Where are we going to lunch then? Port Angeles is a big city, someone will recognize me."

"We're staying at the house," Bella says, soothingly. "I told him it'd been a while, and that I wanted to catch up without having to worry about being in the town. I'm making lunch when we get there. We'll probably make a stop at a grocery store on the way, so that I make sure I've got supplies. If I know my father – and I do – he'll have beer and salsa in the fridge, and some chips and boxed macaroni in the cupboard."

Edward and Bella laugh as she explains the menu, and as the drive slows, as they get into town, Edward starts fidgeting in his seat. She can see the sweat beading at his brow. When they get into the grocery store parking lot, she kills the engine and twists in her seat so she's facing Edward.

"Look at me," she whispers, her palm flat against his cheek. "Edward, you have nothing to worry about. My father will love you eventually, but I love you, and that's all that matters. If you're worried or nervous, there is no shame in taking the medication. Do you understand me? If you think you're proving something to me by _not_ taking them, you're mistaken. You're strong, and right now, you're healing, Edward. Healing. You don't have to worry about anything, ok? If you want to take these, take them," she says, reaching into her purse to grab the tablets. "Either way, I want you happy, nothing else, and if these will calm you down so that you can enjoy today without panicking, then fine."

"I don't want to take them," he says. "Is that ok?" He looks so scared, so lost.

"Edward, of course it's ok. Baby, you don't ever have to take these. I brought them for you, in case you got too overwhelmed. I won't make you take them unless you start to panic."

"Promise?"

"Yes, Edward, I promise you."

"I don't want to disappoint you," Edward confesses, leaning into her hand and holding it closer to his face. "I never want to disappoint you."

"You couldn't, even if you tried. Just be you."

He calms down, slowly, and as they make their way into the deserted grocery store, they walk hand in hand, sunglasses on, coats pulled tight to their bodies. She knows Edward's faced his fair share of fan sightings, and doesn't want, nor need, today to be one of those days.

They push a cart together through the store, from proteins to produce, and grab some ingredients to make cookies for dessert. At the butcher counter, Bella orders some fresh tilapia and shrimp to grill. She gets some fruit for a fruit salsa from the produce section. She also got some squash and asparagus to serve with it the fish, hoping that her father wouldn't be so adverse to greens that he'd deny her lunch.

"Dad's not much of a vegetable person, but when I was little, I'd eat them like nothing, so he always bought them. I'm hoping that he'll eat this today, even though I'm sure he'd much rather like those steaks."

As the two of them stroll through the store, she grabs a bag of lemons and a bag of ice, so she can make fresh lemonade. They pay – Edward pays – even though Bella insists against it, and they head back to the car.

"I love fish," Edward says. "I didn't know you knew how to cook so well. I mean, sandwiches and pancakes are hardly pan seared fish and vegetables."

"I don't do it often," Bella shrugs, starting up the car after all the groceries are stuffed away. "Only on special occasions, and today, is a special occasion."

"Am I the first person you've brought home to meet your father?" Edward asks. His eyes light up and he looks happy. Bella thinks he should always look like this.

"Yes," she laughs, patting his knee. "You are the only boy I've brought home to meet my parents. My mom's kind of crazy, so we'll save her for later. Plus, she'd recognize you and tell Angela. She loves your music about as much as we do."

"Really? I'll make sure to sign something for her, maybe that will help her to like me."

"You won't need to get anything for her, Edward. She'll like you because you love me."

"I do love you," he whispers. "I don't say it enough. I mean, I know Carlisle's friend is coming soon, and I know you're worried, but I love you, Isabella Marie. I do."

She takes a deep breath, smiling sadly. "I know that, Edward. I know you do right now, and that's all that matters to me. We're going to get you over this stupid Complex, and we'll be stronger on the other side."

She tries not to think about her dream, especially right as they're pulling into the driveway of her father's house. "You ready?"

"As I'll ever be."

"Just remember, beer, guns, flannel, badge, and you'll be fine. He's a teddy bear when you're past his games. Just be you."

The minute they walk in, just as Bella predicted, Charlie stands, his rifle in his hands, the cleaning rag tossed over his flannel-clad shoulder. Edward, who's holding the grocery bags, reaches his hand out, shyly, and smiles. "Detective Swan? I'm Edward, it's nice to finally meet you."

"Edward," Charlie says, his tone bored.

"Daddy," Bella breathes, waiting for him to put his rifle down before she hugs him fiercely. "I'm so glad to see you."

"You too, Bells. I hope he's treating you right, for you to move all the way up here. I talked with your mother about it. She said it was all very sudden."

"Not now, Dad," Bella says, shaking her head. "Edward, let's take the bags to the kitchen. I'll get started on lunch. Put your guns away, Daddy. You're not fooling anyone with your cop act."

She hears Charlie sigh as she walks back toward the kitchen, Edward on her heels. He sets the bags down and automatically wraps his arms around her, his chin resting over her head.

"Are you alright?" she asks him, gripping the back of his shirt in her fists as she holds onto him.

"Yes," he sighs, rubbing at her spine. "I'm just nervous, like I should be. If we get started on lunch, I'll be ok. I'm ready for this."

She can see the look in his eyes as she pulls back to look at him. She knows what he's saying is really, "I'm not going to freak out like I did at Jacob and Nessie's." She smiles up at him and tip toes up to kiss his cheek.

The sound of someone clearing their throats interrupts them, and Bella pulls back to roll her eyes at her father, who's leaning against the door jamb, waiting for them to pull apart.

"I bought fish for lunch, do you still have your grill pan? If not, this shindig will have to go outside."

"I have the grill pan," Charlie says. "Not that I know why on Earth anyone would use it. Grillin' is for barbeques and outdoors, not for kitchens."

"It's freezing outside, Daddy, I'm not going to cook outside if I don't have to. Now, where's the pan?" She pulls all the food out of the bags and separates everything. "Edward, do you want to rinse all the vegetables? I'll get the fish prepared for the grill."

Charlie gets the pan out of the cupboard. It's dusty and gross, so Bella washes it before she does anything else, and then sets it on the stove top, letting it heat up before she pulls out the fish. She dices up the mangos, pears, and squeezes some fresh lime over it.

Edward washes up the asparagus and the squash and gets them ready for the grill pan, rolling them in light olive oil and some salt and pepper before he hands them off to Bella. He rests his hands at Bella's hips and watches as she simultaneously reminisces with her father and prepares their lunch. With the fruit salsa finished, she asks Edward to chop up some onion and cilantro for it, and has him toss it with the same olive oil. The veggies are turned and then the fish and shrimp skewers go down, all three filets going down at once, the three kabobs going right next to them.

The lemonade takes a few minutes, and is done right as Bella flips the fish over to the next side. She dips the rims of the three glasses into water, and then into sugar before she pours the lemonade in and hands one to her father.

"This looks great, Bella," Edward comments as she plates the fruit salsa down, the fish on top of that, with the shrimp and vegetables off to the side. "Smells good, too."

"Yeah, Bells, looks delicious," Charlie says, grabbing his plate and glass of lemonade as he walks to the kitchen table. "I haven't had a good meal like this in ages."

"You need to eat better, Dad," Bella sighs, rolling her eyes.

"Not now, Isabella," Charlie says, laughing the words she'd said to him earlier back at her. "Now, Edward, what is it that you do?"

"I'm a musician," he answers, his hand holding Bella's tight under the table. "I write and play my own music."

"A musician?"

"Daddy," Bella warns, looking at him pointedly as she spears a piece of asparagus with her fork.

"Yes sir," Edward answers. "Music saved my life, on more than one occasion. It's my passion."

"What type of musician?"

"I play in a band, mostly guitar and piano, but I'm a classically trained pianist as well. I've studied it for years."

"You're dating a rock star, Hells Bells?" Charlie says, laughing through his mouthful of food. "You have better sense than that."

"He's not just a rock star, Dad," Bella moans. "He's an amazing and talented artist."

"I'm kidding, Bells, I'm kidding. He looks at you like you hung the moon, Bella. I'm just kidding."

Bella looks over at Edward and smiles softly, grinning wider when she sees his face, beaming and proud.

"I love her," Edward says with conviction. "She's my best friend, and so much more than that… she's my muse, and I love her."

"I don't need the details, Edward," Charlie says, taking his last bite. "Just treat her with respect, and love, and we're square, got it?"

"Yes sir."

Bella rolls her eyes. "I'm right here, Jesus. At least wait until I'm busy with cookie dough before you start talking about me like I'm not."

"There's cookies?" Charlie asks, his surprised face reminds Bella of a child.

"There will be if you continue to be nice to my boyfriend," Bella says, clearing their plates. "So, do you approve?"

"Well, I mean, he puts up with your bossy attitude, so that's a plus." Bella rolls her eyes again. "And he dotes on you as you should be doted on, another plus. He's too quiet, so, there's one negative. But he's like another part of you. You work seamlessly together, in the kitchen, in conversation…" Charlie pauses, taking a slow pull of his lemonade. "Its nuts, but it's like I'm intruding on you two just sitting at the table, which is equal parts disturbing and relieving. He completes you, and you do the same to him. I watched you cooking, how he looked at you. If you keep her happy, Edward, you have my approval."

"Yes sir, I promise," Edward nods, as he shakes Charlie's hand. "She's special, and I promise I'll take care of her."

Charlie just nods, staying at the kitchen table as Bella and Edward go back into the kitchen to get the cookies ready. Bella knows he can see them from where he's sitting, so she keeps her distance from Edward, even though all she wants to do is kiss him until they're both breathless. She starts to form the cookie dough with Edward at her side, and calls her father in a bit later to lick the bowl.

The cookies turn out perfectly, gooey in the center, the chocolate chips just melting into the dough, with a firm outer layer. Charlie eats four before they've even cooled, and as Bella continues to bake, she slips the cooled ones into the freshly washed – it being as dusty as the grill pan was – cookie jar with a slice of bread to keep them moist.

After a long day of lunch, baking, and reminiscing, Bella and Edward get ready to leave. Charlie pulls Bella aside as Edward heads out toward the car.

"Does he treat you good?" He asks, his voice serious.

"Yes, Daddy, like a princess."

"I'm your father, Bells. If I didn't ask these questions I wouldn't merit the title. I love you, you're my baby, and I want to make sure you're being treated like you deserve. Are you happy?"

"Happier than I've ever been in my life," she tells him, looking up at him with complete honesty. "He's everything I ever dreamed a prince would be, Dad. I promise."

"I want you to call me if anything happens. I know you're living closer now. I want to hear from you more often. Next time you're up this way, stop by, you hear?"

"Yes, Daddy," she says, rolling her eyes, playfully this time. "I will. I'll call you when I get home so you know we made it back safe."

He kisses her on the forehead and holds her close for a second, sighing deeply as he lets her go. Bella pats his shoulder after the hug and heads out after Edward, smiling happily as she skips along.

"I'm so proud of you, Edward. So proud." Bella grins and reaches her hand across the consol to hold his in her own as she starts the car and backs out of the drive. "He totally approves."

"Thank god," Edward breathes, pulling her hand up to kiss the back of it. "I just want you happy. You look so happy right now," he tells her softly. "I want you to look this happy always."

"You make me this happy," she says, squeezing his palm. "And you didn't need the pills, either. Carlisle will be impressed."

"I hope Carmen will be too. I just want a clean bill of health so we can be through with this. After she clears me, I'll be able to be with you, always."

As Edward says her name, Bella swallows thickly. She knows she's just bidding her time, the borrowed time she's got until Carmen comes. What if Carmen thinks it best that Bella leave? What if she thinks that Edward needs to be alone? She couldn't know that Edward still hates to sleep alone, or bathe alone. _She doesn't know him like I do_, she thinks.

"Bella? Baby, what happened? You're shaking. Are you ok? Pull over, Bella, please. Are you alright?"

Bella shakes herself out of it, blinking rapidly. "I'm sorry Edward, I got carried away," she smiles sadly. "I'm just worried about Carmen's ideas, that's all. She's going to be good for us though, and as soon as she thinks you're ready, we _will_ be together."

"I'm going to marry you, Isabella Swan. Just you wait."

---

a/n: This project is kind of my _baby_. The term "Superman Complex" (AS USED BY ME) is completely my own fabricated diagnosis. I have no medical background. Special thanks to _**the -glory-days**_, as _always_, for kicking me in the ass every time I stop writing. Updates will be few and far between, but because they're so much longer than my other chapter updates, I hope that's all right with you guys.

--

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	14. Chapter 14

Edward Cullen is a rock star in the biggest band of the decade. He's America's "It Boy," but he's still unhappy. Will Bella be in time to save him? AH AU

Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer created _Twilight_; I'm just toying around with her characters.

**AN: And real life gets in the way again!**

This morning, everyone took it easy, relaxing later than usual, even Alice. Bella notices the quiet as soon as she wakes up, her eyes catching the time on he digital clock; 11:30 AM. The vibrant red numbers makes her blink a few times, and when she finally realizes that those numbers are representing the actual time…. She gasps and sits up fast.

Carmen is due around two this afternoon, her evaluation is supposed to be candid, and Bella knows she shouldn't worry or work herself up, there's nothing she can do either way, but she does work herself up anyway. She jumps out of the bed, tripping over Edward and groaning as she stubs her big toe of the nightstand.

Edward moans, grabbing his chest where Bella fell, and sits up, blinking. "Bella, are you all right?" he asks, immediately concerned. "What's wrong?"

"What's wrong? Are you serious right now? What's wrong?" She asks, hopping on her right foot as she holds her left in her hand. She remembers that Carlisle asked her to stay calm in front of Edward about Carmen. Sighing, Bella sits back down on the bed, "We slept really late, and I stubbed my toe."

It's not exactly a lie, but she's sure as shit not being honest. He looks relieved by her answer, but she can tell he's worried, can see the indicators all over his face. His eyes are crinkled, he's gnawing on his lip. "Edward, I'm fine."

"You're nervous about today," he says. It's not a question, and Bella knows she needs to tread carefully. Edward's been doing so well, ever since meeting her father, no outbursts, nothing.

"I am," she answers, deciding on the truth. "But no matter what she decides, we're still going to be ok. You're gonna get better, with or without me right? I mean, honestly, I want to be here with you, but you'll get better even if I'm not here, right?"

Bella watches Edward look down at his hands, picking at his fingernails.

"Edward," she tries again. "If Dr. Salazar tells me to leave so you can get better, you _will_ get better, right?"

When he doesn't look up, Bella sighs and reaches for his chin, pulling his face up to meet her eyes. "Edward, you _are_ going to get better."

"I don't want you to leave, Bella," he tells her, but before he can continue, she cuts him off, putting her index finger to his lips.

"You will be fine, do you hear me? Carmen will tell us what she thinks is best for both of us. If she tells me to go, then I go, but that doesn't mean I'm going to be gone forever, just until you're better."

Bella gets up, standing up and stretching. She watches as Edward follows and sighs when he immediately attaches himself to her. "The physical strains, but a memory, emotionally we're trapped," she whispers, looking up at him.

"What's that from?" He asks, rubbing his thumb across her jaw. "It's kind of beautifully tragic."

Bella just laughs and shrugs. "So are you, Edward Cullen, so are you."

Together, the two of them get ready for the day, leaving the room to the bathroom. Bella starts the shower and gets the temperature up to the right warmth for Edward.

She calls to him, telling him the shower's ready for him, and waits. When he comes in, he's got this ridiculously mischievously look on his face.

Bella knows that look.

"No," she shakes her head, walking out of the bathroom as he laughs. She's already out the door before he can stop her.

She picks out a dress from her closet, going with a modest sundress that comes down just below her knees. It's a pretty light green and ties around the waist with a big bow. She decides that she can also take the time to do her hair, and walks into the bathroom as Edward showers. She knocks on the door frame to get his attention as she goes in, accidentally looking at his silhouette through the fogged shower door. It's steamy, but she can see him, standing still, with his head down. He didn't even acknowledge her entrance, which is definitely not normal for Edward.

"Edward?" She asks, concerned now. "Are you all right?"

When he doesn't immediately respond, Bella drops her dress and hurries to the bathroom door, pausing briefly to knock on the glass. "Edward, I'm going to come in, ok?"

She pops open the shower door and blinks as the steam billows out and clouds her vision. Once she gets her bearings back, she gasps and steps into the shower, grabbing Edward's hands. The razor in his right hand falls to the shower floor with a loud _clang_ that reverberates off the tiles with an ominous echo.

"Edward Anthony," Bella whispers, her pajamas soaked through, her tears disguised by the rivulets of water from the shower. "Look at me!" she yells, his unresponsive gaze unnerving. "Look at me, god damnit!"

She lets his left hand go and slaps him across the face, the blow pulling him out of whatever reverie he was in. He collapses into her arms, eyes rolling back as they close. The added weight catches Bella by surprise and she buckles under the pressure.

With Edward passed out on top of her, she can't move at all. The sound must have caught some attention, because the next thing Bella hears is banging on the bathroom door.

"Come in, please help me!" she cries out, trying to keep Edward's head up.

Emmett and Jasper come in first, carefully pulling Edward off of Bella. Carlisle wraps a towel around Edward's waist as Jasper helps Bella out of the tub.

I'm fine, Jasper, really," she says, dripping as she hurries over to Edward's side. Emmett had laid him out on the bathroom floor, so she slides to her knees and quickly assesses both of his wrists and then his hands, then his face. He's got a big red hand print on his cheek. A glaring reminder of what Bella had to do. She gasps at the mark, but is secretly relieved that it is the only mark on him.

"What happened?" Carlisle asks, looking over Edward. He looks to Emmett and says, "Emmett, go get my bag out of my study." Emmett nods and runs out of the bathroom, and Bella looks up to see both Jasper and Carlisle watching her.

"He was taking a shower. I went to pick out my outfit, he's. He's been so good lately, I didn't… I left him in here for maybe five minutes, and when I knocked on the door, he didn't respond. When I couldn't get his attention, I opened the shower door and he was staring at my razor." She sighs and puts her head in her hands. "I grabbed his wrists and the razor fell but he just kept staring, so I slapped him. He collapsed into my arms and we fell…. He's ok, right? He'll be ok?"

"I'll know in a few minutes," Carlisle says, holding his hand out as Emmett returns with the bag.

He gets out a small vile of what Bella can only assume to be smelling salts, and sets it under his nose.

Edward coughs awake, eyes wide, immediately searching for Bella. He sits up and grabs her, hugging her close to him, apologizing over and over again.

She holds him close and pets at his wet hair, trying to calm him down. Carlisle tells the boys to leave, and then gets up himself. He looks down at her and says, "I'll want to take a look at those bruises later, before Carmen gets here, so come see me, ok?" He points at her knees, and Bella groans. _Great, more bruises…_

Bella and Edward stay on the bathroom floor for another twenty minutes or so, him crying into her chest, her holding him in her arms.

"Baby, please," he mutters, his lips traveling over her exposed skin, kissing at her collarbone, up her neck to her jaw. "I need you," he says, his lips flat against the plane of her neck, moaning into her skin. His hands start to explore then, pulling at her wet pajamas, reaching down under them.

"Edward, stop. What's going on here?" Bella asks, pushing him away, reaching for his arms. "I don't know what you think you're doing, but you need to stop."

"Please," he says again, breaking out of her hold, touching her again, grabbing her close so he can kiss her. "I need to know you're real. That you're still here, even though… though I." He grabs her arm and flips it over, running his finger over the slight scar from their first encounter. "I did that to you, oh god. I'm so sorry, Isabella."

She doesn't get to ask him what he's doing, or tell him it's ok, because Alice knocks and hurries into the bathroom. "Bella, Carmen's earlier than we were expecting. Her plane landed in Port Angeles, she'll be here in an hour."

Bella gasps, starting to panic now. She thought she had time to get ready, to calm herself down, but now, with what's just happened with Edward, she has time for neither.

She stands up and pulls Edward with her. "Edward, I'm real," she tells him. She waves to Alice as she leaves them alone, mouthing a silent 'thank you' to her. She turns her attention back to Edward and says, "I'm here, I'm real, and we're ok. I'm all right. This scar will fade, and so will the memories. Right now, you have to get dressed, and we'll talk when that's done."

She leads him out of the bathroom and over to the closet, picking out clothes for him. She grabs a brown button down and some jeans, handing them to him so he can get dressed while she dries off.

"What happened in there?" She asks him, changing out of her pajamas and into her slightly wrinkled pale green dress. "Were you going to…" she trails off, not wanting to ask, but knowing she has to.

He stops buttoning his shirt, looking at her with an almost hurt expression on his face. "Absolutely not!" He exclaims, angry. He walks to her, shirt half open, jeans low on his hips, and puts his hands on her waist, walking her back against the wall. "I will never, ever do that again, Bella. I swear to you…. I. I saw I t, and picked it up, and it was like… I just, I saw everything, when I cut you, me, how you saved me, carried me out of that room. I will never put you through anything like that again. Ever."

Bella sighs in relieve and rests her cheek against his chest. "Thank you," she whispers, trying not to cry. "Thank you, Edward."

She kisses his bare chest and looks up at him, her eyes bright again. "Let's get ready for Carmen. We've got some explaining to do downstairs, and I'm starving." She grins. "Maybe we can talk to Carlisle about this revelation before she arrives."

"I don't want her to be here," he says. Bella's heard him say it before, but this time, it's different some how.

"I do," Bella says honestly. "I think her opinion will be very productive. She'll be honest, and unbiased, and I think she'll be very helpful for us."

She can tell he hasn't changed his mind about her, but she doesn't mind. She likes that they can disagree, it shows improvement on Edward's progress.

They go downstairs, ready to eat, to find the entire family waiting for them in the kitchen. She smiles at all of them and nods her head, silently telling them that everything is ok.

"He's good, aren't you?" she asks, prepping him to speak.

"I'm fine," he answers, looking at everyone. "I wasn't going to…" this time, Bella notices that Edward trails off, like he can't even fathom it. "I'll never scare any of you like that again."

When Esme walks up to Edward, she hesitates, but Bella doesn't expect what Edward does. He takes his mother into his arms and hugs her fiercely. "I'm so sorry, Mom," he tells, kissing the top of her head.

"Oh sweetie," Esme murmurs. "I know, baby, it's ok. We're ok, honey. We're here for you."

Bella just shakes her head fondly and walks toward the table, sitting between Alice and Rosalie while Edward has the much needed heart to heart with his mother. Eventually, he sits across from her at the table, runs his foot up Bella's calf, and smiles at her. She doesn't bring up the eye-opening experience that Edward had, instead, just asks Carlisle if they can all talk before Carmen arrives.

He agrees and they eat lunch. It's strangely normal, and Bella knows she isn't the only one who notices. Edward isn't sitting next to her, for one, and for another thing, he's interacting with everyone, responding, laughing… She wants to think this is just a normal thing, think that Edward is just having a good day, but she can't stop the thought that says that Edward is just putting on a show.

He's the front man of a band, an internationally famous band, he knows how to put on a show. She doesn't want to think it, but the thought crosses her mind more than once during their lunch together. He's more composed, lighter almost, like he appears in some of the DVD's from their tours. He isn't looking to her for every answer, isn't asking for her permission.

She shakes the thought out of her head and tries to stay positive. Maybe the shower incident triggered something good in him, something that will lead to recovery. She nods to herself, and then rejoins the conversation, which is optimistic and light, despite the fact that Carmen is due to change their lives irrevocably in less than an hour.

After lunch, Bella heads upstairs to grab the laptop. She leaves Edward downstairs, who's – remarkably- in the living room with Jasper and Emmett, talking about what they need to do for _Twilight_. She can hear him talk about that acoustic CD, how he'll – they'll - need time to adjust to what's going on.

"The pressure is just intense, I guess. The fans will know something's wrong, and I'm just not ready to be part of that scene yet. Not to mention Bella, I mean. I know Alice and Rose can handle the life, but Bella is so…not a part of that. I don't know if that will be good for her, you know, coming along?"

She decides not to listen to the rest, just goes into her room (not Edward's) and closes the door. She boots it up and decides that now's as good a time as any to update.

_Hi Journal,_

_I just wanted to take a minute out of the day to express my concerns. "Mrs. Donovan" comes today for her take on our situation, and I can't help but feel like "Charlie Brown" is hiding something from me. It's like he's putting on this face, hiding his true self. I don't want it to be true, I really want him to be happy, and to be himself, and BETTER, but I'm just unsure._

"_Charlie Brown's" dad and I are meeting today, to talk about what happened. I want him to know about everything, so I'll probably give him the link to you, too, Journal. Getting inside my head is probably something "Mrs. Donovan" will want to do, and I'm sure "Charlie Brown's" father will want this to show her. I'm not gonna mind, if he does. She'll need to see it eventually._

_I'm really nervous that "Lucy" will be right. Or well… what "Lucy" thought in the beginning. She said some things that make sense now. I don't know what I'm doing, and "Mrs. Donovan" will just reiterate that point. I don't want to leave the "Peanuts Family". They've let me in, and… God, I'm terrified._

"_Mrs. Donovan" is coming in and… I've just got this feeling like maybe "Charlie Brown" is really coming full circle. I heard him say something today, not about me directly, but about me and him, and being together… I just feel like maybe what he's feeling isn't what he was feeling? I don't have any concrete proof, but shit, I just. I'm scared, and the journal is supposed to be for my feelings, right?_

_I need to talk to "Marcie" but I'm pretty sure she'll read my emotions like the lines from a play. Maybe after everything today, it won't matter, and I'll be able to go home. I could stay with "Marcie" for a few days, until I get everything sorted, right?_

_Anyway, that's all for now, Journal._

_Yours,_

_Peppermint Patty._

Bella shuts down the laptop after that and walks to the banister to call to for Edward, who's still downstairs with Jasper and Emmett. They're still talking, Jasper this time, about how Laurent will be pleased that Edward's ready to put some new acoustic tracks down.

"Edward? Ready to meet with Carlisle?" Bella calls down, interrupting whatever Edward was saying. She knows that him thinking about her in a permanent future-type setting should be positive, but the way he worded it was like he… _No, I'm not going there_, she tells herself. "We have to meet with him before Carmen gets here."

She hears him bounding up the stairs, a smile still in place. "Ok, I'm ready when you are," he tells her. She gives him a weak smile in return, and sighs when he walks into the study before her.

She sits beside him, the laptop on her lap as Edward retells his story from before. Carlisle's face is thoughtful, and every now and then, Bella watches as he scribbles some things down, notes, and things like that. He doesn't ask for her opinions on anything, which only makes Bella's mood deflate that much more. Just because Carmen is coming, Bella feels like maybe she doesn't matter anymore. Especially when Carlisle says, "Carmen will be pleased with this piece of news, Edward. Really. This is great!"

Neither Edward nor Carlisle look to Bella, whose head is down and focused on the laptop. When Edward finishes telling Carlisle about the shower event, both look to Bella. She looks up at them and smiles softly, her thoughts almost overwhelming her.

"Bella? Dad asked if you had anything to add, are you ok?" Edward asks, looking at her, reaching out for her hand. She stands quickly and puts the laptop on Carlisle's desk.

"No, nothing else to report," Bella says, the soft smile accompanying her shaky voice. "But I thought I'd give you the laptop so you can see the journal, Carlisle, and maybe show Dr. Salazar eventually. The link is the homepage for the web browser, so you'll be able to access it easily. I have to finish getting ready though, before Dr. Salazar gets here."

She leaves the room, and before she's even out the door, Edward's talking to Carlisle about a song from their first album. One Bella knows every word to, _Sinking Fast Now_, is about changing your mind, shooting for something bigger and better, and how you're always left unsatisfied. She wonders if that's how Edward feels about her.

Her melancholy mood gets worse as she heads toward her bedroom, and suddenly the green dress she's wearing, which she picked out to wow Dr. Salazar, feels stifling. She walks to the closet and decides on a dress she had before Alice. A dress she wore once, for an office party. It's black and cotton and comfortable. The dress doesn't match Edward's eyes, it isn't form fitting, or formal, or silky, it's black, cotton, and comfortable. She doesn't want to pretend that she's capable anymore, not when she's feeling the way she does.

She pulls her hair to the side and braids it down from the crown of her head to the tip of her hair in a French braid, loose and wispy, and glides on some of the make up she Alice gave her. The mirror shows the reflection of someone who looks like her, but she doesn't feel quite like herself.

Before she can reflect any longer, she's pulled from her reverie by a knock on the door. Edward comes in a second later and opens his mouth to say something, then closes it.

"Every thing ok, Bella?" He asks, nonchalantly, Bella thinks. "Why did you change?"

"I felt like I was trying to hard," she answers. This is the worst – _absolute worst! _- time to be feeling the way she feels, but she can't seem to shake out of it. "This dress is comfortable."

"Well, you look great, and uh, Mom says Carmen's car pulled up."

And just like that, Edward is whisking her off, down the stairs. He doesn't look nervous, doesn't say anything to make her think he's worried at all, but maybe that's a good thing. If he's not thinking about the potential fact that she might be asked to leave, maybe he won't worry about it, if it happens.

They get to the landing just as Esme opens the door, and does the cheek-cheek kiss to Carmen. They exchange pleasantries for a minute before Carmen turns to her and Edward.

"Hello," she says brightly. "You must be Bella, it's great to meet you!"

It feels genuine, and that unnerves Bella that much more. "Hi, Dr. Salazar, yeah, I'm Bella Swan. You probably know Edward?"

"Yes, we've been introduced, it's great to see you again."

Carlisle interrupts, thankfully, because Bella doesn't know if she's going to make it through the introduction, let alone the evaluation. "Carmen, it's so good of you to come!" He says, and even he sounds delighted. If they all wanted her to leave, they could have just told her. They didn't need to go through the hassle of bringing in a family friend cum doctor cum psychological disorder specialist.

They talk for a while, and Bella closes her eyes and takes a deep breath. When she opens her eyes, Edward looks further away, and the only one paying her any attention is Rosalie. Rosalie looks like she understands, like she knows exactly what Bella is going through, even though Bella's sure Rosalie doesn't.

She smiles sadly at Rosalie and then turns her attention back to the conversation. Carmen and Carlisle are discussing what and where they'll be doing the evaluation, but Bella feels like all they're doing is deciding her fate without her. She tries, like hell, to pay attention, to stay alert and focused, but every time she looks to Edward, he's getting further from her. He's distancing himself - physically - from her, and it feels like her nightmare is coming to a head.

Maybe Carmen is _The Little Red Headed Girl_ from her nightmares. Maybe she's not _Mrs. Donovan, Charlie Brown's teacher_, but instead, she's the one _Charlie Brown_ pines for, despite Peppermint Patty's obvious infatuation. Maybe that's all it is, for both of them, simple, juvenile infatuation.

"Bella?"

She blinks, back in to the present now, and looks to see everyone staring at her. "I'm sorry, what?" She asks, making herself look less capable than she's ever felt. Esme smiles at her, that same smile that Rosalie gave her, and now Bella really feels pathetic.

"I was just suggesting that we, you me and Edward," Carmen says, looking at Bella like she understands what's going through her mind. "Get started? Maybe chat a little, before I talk with you one-on-one."

Edward nods, looking at Carmen without looking at Bella once, so Bella nods, following behind the two as Edward leads them into the den. Edward leads, he makes decisions, he opens doors, and he smiles, those are normal, rational things, but Bella sees them for something else, sees them as Edward's way of breaking ties with her, and forming a bond with Dr. Salazar.

When they sit, Bella's surprised when Edward sits next to her, taking her hand. She's so surprised, in fact, that she jumps. Edward pulls back, looking almost hurt, and scoots further down on the couch. _Get a hold of yourself, Bella,_ she chides mentally. She takes a cleansing breath, and moves to sit next to Edward, taking his hand in hers and offering an apologetic smile. She mouths, "I'm sorry," and when he nods and kisses at her temple, she feels at peace again.

"So, let's get this underway, shall we?" Carmen asks, looking at the two of them peacefully. "Edward, how are you feeling? What you've been through in the last three months has been very tramatic, but it seems as though you're coping quite well. What do you think the explanation for this is?"

"Bella," he answers easily. "My father has gone over the complex with me, he's explained all the phases, all of the setbacks and progressions that have been made in the field, but not only that, he's showed me how imperative the 'savior' is. I've had Bella since Day 1. She's been here through everything, helping me progress, even when I've wanted nothing more than to revert back to that frame of mind I was in before the incident."

Bella, sitting quietly and listening is shocked by this. She was under the impression that Carlisle was meeting only with her, not with him as well. She also didn't realize what was going on in his head was so severe. Had she known, she might have suggested a professional sooner.

"Interesting," Carmen says, and again, Bella's zoned out, and wherever the conversation had traveled is a mystery to her. "Bella, how do you feel about the last three months?" She sees Carmen's question for what it really is. _Do you think he's really progressing as he says he is?_

"Well, I don't know the ins and outs of the disorder, or what goes through his head most of the time, but Carlisle's told me what I should expect, and even when I'm caught off guard, I somehow know what I need to do to help him get past it."

"Like what? Can you give me an example?"

She looks up at Carmen, and then at Edward. "Well, I took him to the reservation a few miles from here, a while back, and -"

"Wait, you've taken him out in public? Interesting," Bella watches as Carmen interrupts, writing something down on the pad of paper concealed in her lap.

"Should I not have?" Bella asks. Carmen waves her hand dismissively and asks her to continue, so Bella does. "We went out, just to see some friends of mine. My father's from around here, so I knew a few people. Jake and Ness. We went to their bakery, had breakfast, and All of it kind of overwhelmed Edward, so we went home. Afterward, he asked me to leave, got really angry, and." She sighs, but Carmen - and Edward for that matter - look at her encouragingly as if asking her to continue. "He got angry and went into this frenzy. He almost hurt his family, and me, and himself, and I just.. instinctively knew how to calm him down. I spoke to him, held onto him, and he calmed, like I broke the spell."

"Most intriguing," Carmen notes. "How many times would you say he's gone into that sort of," she puts her hands up to use air-quotes, "Frenzy?"

"A few," Bella says. "Uh, once at the hospital, when he first woke up. Once in the airport, when a fan got a little rough, and a few times here. He hasn't for a while, not since Ness and Jake's, and we've gone out since."

"Really? Hmm, now, Edward, how would you explain your thought process when you're in what Bella calls a 'frenzy.' Would you say you're in control, or would you call it more of a blind rage?"

"The first time, in the hospital, it was more controlled. I knew who I was looking for, _what_ I was looking for. When I found her, Bella," he looks down at her and squeezes her hand. "I knew I was all right. The other times were a little less controlled. I couldn't stop myself until I heard her voice. It was like a fog, like I couldn't control my thoughts, or my body, and she broke through that."

"What about the last time?" Carmen asks. "Bella says you hurt her."

"I said he almost hurt me," Bella corrects. "I was fine."

"Maybe physically, but emotionally, how _could_ you be fine?" Carmen asks, almost condescending. Bella looks at her inquisitively and then cools herself down. Carmen continues, "That's neither here nor there, Edward, tell me about the last time."

"I was overwhelmed, like Bella explained. I got angry and told her to leave. I couldn't stop myself from yelling, and when she left the room, the rage didn't stop. I. I broke some things. Some of my mother's things, and then went after her. Emmett tried to stop me, my father did too, but I got to her, and I. I wanted to possess her being, I never wanted her to leave. My brain kept screaming, 'mine' over and over again, but then it stopped."

"Stopped, how?"

"Her voice."

"What do you mean, her voice? Did she scream for help?"

"No, she promised never to leave, told me she was right there, that she wouldn't leave, and I could see it in her eyes. I saw what she meant. She wouldn't abandon me like that."

"Is that right, Bella?"

Bella looks at Carmen's face, and for a moment she sees the amusement she heard in her voice when she told her how she felt. She can't help herself when she says, "What, you're not making your own assumption on this? My emotions went haywire that day, how could I be fine, remember?"

"Bella!" Edward says, whispering her name harshly in her ear.

"No, Edward, that's fine," Carmen says, writing something down swiftly. "Bella is very protective of you, just as you are of her. I can sense that she's worried, and I'll tell you right now that when I heard of this situation, I couldn't imagine a worse scenario of recovery than falling in love. However," she says, hand up to stop Bella, who's chomping at the bit to stop her. "I can see that you, Bella, have done some amazing things to aid his recovery. It's the exact opposite of what I'd assumed, and for that, I'm sorry."

She looks to Bella, and then to Edward. "I'm not sure I have everything I need to complete my evaluation, but I do have enough from you two. I'll need to confer with Carlisle, of course. He's been meeting with the two of you privately, as I would like to do, but perhaps not right now."

"What do you mean you have enough from us? Are you separating us?" Bella asks, the panic immediately written all over her face.

"No, not yet," Carmen answers. "I'll say this though. Edward, you would not have survived this without her. As for the romance, I'm not sure if that's so wise, especially when both of you are so fragile, but the trust you have in one another is astounding. The fact that you agreed to go with Bella, out, to see others so quickly after your incident is something I've never seen before. You have faith in her, a binding, knowing, faith that she won't steer you in the wrong direction. And Bella, you trust him enough to tell you if what you're asking of him is too much."

Bella watches her pause and write something down. "Now, I also wasn't expecting you to be functioning as you are now," she says to Edward. "Actually, if I didn't know why I was here, and I couldn't see the scars, and bruises, I wonder if I'd be able to tell at all. That says a million things about how influential Bella is, and has been. I still need to discuss things with your family, but unofficially, I think separating you would be detrimental to both of you."

The weight Bella feels on her chest feels lessened, but not gone, like she thought it would be after Carmen said that. She's confused, like she should feel better than she does, but she doesn't. Edward seems happy, seems more than happy.

"One more thing, before we stop," Carmen says. "I assume you've had a physical relationship, correct?" She looks between them. "You've been intimate?"

Bella answers this one. "Yes," she says. "We were... _intimate_ when we found out you were coming. We were both really upset about it at first, for different reasons, but the same reason, it turns out. We didn't want to be separated."

"Have you been intimate before?"

"Nothing like that, we've kissed, and things along that line, but we've only had sex once." Her blush is deep red, from her temples to her collar bone.

"Do you feel like its your first thought, when you're feeling emotionally overwhelmed, to be sexually intimate with one another?" Carmen asks them both. "Is that your first instinct?"

Bella thinks about Edward's reaction today in the bathroom, but it feels like it almost doesn't qualify.

"No," they say in unison. Bella looks up to Edward with a smile, and he continues. "I wouldn't say it's a first instinct. I want to be intimate with her. I mean, I'm male, and we sleep together every night. But my first instinct is to hear her voice. When I hear her talk to me, tell me that she's there, and that she's real. That's enough."

"Bella, what about you?"

"The physical connection," Bella answers. "I like feeling him. Skin on skin. If I can feel his cheek, when I'm trying to calm him down, or calm me down. Or if he holds my hand, it's right."

"Right how?" Carmen asks, still scribbling.

"Like I'm right where I'm supposed to be at that very second, with who I'm supposed to be with."

"Yeah," Edward says, nodding in agreement. "That's exactly what it feels like."

Carmen nods, and finishes writing long enough to look up at them. "I think that's all I need for now. If you could call Carlisle in, that would be great."

She looks back down, like she's forgotten about them already, so Bella stands, pulling Edward with her. She stops as they're almost out the door, and says, "Dr. Salazar?"

Carmen looks up. "Yes?"

"Does that mean we can be physically intimate? I mean, should we? Or... Can we?"

"I think," Carmen says, setting her pen down. "I think I'm learning what should and should not be done in this sense, from you. If you feel it's right, think it's right, do it. Your instincts have gotten you further than I've ever seen in the Superman Complex cases I've studied. Maybe physical intimacy is an important part of recovery."

Bella smirks and nods. "Thanks."

"Oh, and Bella?"

Bella turns back to face Carmen again. "Have fun."

a/n: This project is kind of my _baby_. The term "Superman Complex" (AS USED BY ME) is completely my own fabricated diagnosis. I have no medical background. Special thanks to _**the -glory-days**_, as _always_, for kicking me in the ass every time I stop writing. Updates will be few and far between, but because they're so much longer than my other chapter updates, I hope that's all right with you guys.

**TWITTER: **cevuplay  
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**Reviews are appreciated. I'd love to hear your feedback :]**


	15. Chapter 15

_Edward Cullen is a rock star in the biggest band of the decade. He's America's "It Boy," but he's still unhappy. Will Bella be in time to save him? AH AU_

Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer created _Twilight_; I'm just toying around with her characters.

**AN: And real life gets in the way again! A little shorter than normal, but it's an update!**

After being free of Carmen's interrogation, Bella makes quick work of getting out of there, heading straight for her room. Not Edward's room… her room. She can't really explain the way she's feeling, not in her head, not in words, and is trying desperately to figure it out. She goes over to get the laptop, to journal about it, and then realizes that she can't, Carlisle has it.

"Shit," she whispers to herself. "Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck." When she gave Carlisle the laptop, she thought for sure that Carmen was going to tell her to go. Thought that she was going to ask for her thoughts on leaving, and be done with it. Now though, Carmen – for all intents and purposes – has given her… blessing? Well, now all of the entries, the journal blogs she's written feel like a mistake.

There's a knock at the door, and when Bella goes to open it, Edward is there, a smirk gracing his lips. Bella rolls her eyes fondly, grinning, and opens the door up all the way to him, letting him in. He saunters in, sharply turning around, and pins Bella against the now closed door.

"So," he says, his face inches from hers. "Carmen."

"What about her?" Bella asks, biting her lip. He's got her hands pulled above her head; his hips flush against her own. She knows exactly what Edward's thinking, but he solidifies it when he starts to kiss at her jaw, nipping at the skin there.

"You know what," Edward answers, licking a trail down her throat. She pushes against his hands, trying to get out of his hold.

"Edward, enough," Bella says, biting her lip. It's not like she really wants to stop, but she's too conflicted to continue. "Not right now."

"Bella, wh- why? Dr. Salazar gave us the green light."

She shakes her head and wiggles out of his grasp. "Edward, you and I need to talk." She sees the look on his face and shakes her head to calm him. "Not about that, it's just… You and I are both in a completely different frame of mind than we were not twelve hours ago. I can't agree to go any further with you until we both talk about what's going on."

"What are you saying? That you don't want to sleep with me?"

Bella scoffs, rolling her eyes. "Stop it, Edward. You know exactly what I'm saying. Being deliberately obtuse is beneath you."

Edward looks at her and starts moving in her direction, prowling, like he's going to trap her again. "I'm not being obtuse. I'm trying to contain my fucking confusion. The psychologist downstairs just told me I could fuck my girlfriend, and said girlfriend is telling me no. What am I supposed to think?"

Scowling at him, Bella gets out of his path and walks to the closet, looking to change out of her black dress and into a white, willowy top and a pair of bleached cut offs. She pulls the clothes out of the closet and walks to the bathroom, not about to give Edward the opportunity to see her in any state of undress with his current mindset.

"You should think that I'm right about this," Bella tells him finally, walking into the bathroom, about to close the door. "We do need to talk and we will talk before anything happens. End of discussion."

She closes the door and attempts to lock it, but Edward's faster than she is, and twists the knob, pushing it open again. "No. This is not the end of this discussion. What's going on in that head of yours, Bella? You've been acting off all day, and now, now that Carmen thinks you're exactly what I need, you're rebuffing me?"

"Carmen, huh? First it was Dr. Salazar and now she's Carmen?" Bella asks, her nerves getting the best of her. "Why don't you ask _Carmen_ to sleep with you then?"

"Be serious, Isabella," Edward says, closing the bathroom door behind him as he presses her against the sink counter. "What are you thinking? Talk to me."

"That's what I'm trying to do, Edward, but you're going crazy about everything. I just want out of this dress."

"I could help you out of that dress," Edward suggests, leaning in against her. "Right here and now, I'll help you out of the dress."

"Edward, that's not the point," Bella sighs, trying to get out from his hold – again. "Get out of the bathroom," she tells him, her voice firm. "Now, Edward."

He looks at her, curious mixed with hurt, and leaves, into his own bedroom. He slams the door behind him and stomps all the way to what Bella assumes is his bed.

She quickly changes out of the dress, folding it softly and putting it on the cabinet in the bathroom, and then slips into her cut offs and her tank top. She looks in the mirror and mentally talks herself up. Telling herself that Carmen knows that she's doing something right, and that Edward's progress is because of her.

"Edward?" Bella says, knocking on the bathroom door leading to his bedroom.

"Can I come in now?"

"Oh, now you want to come." Edward says sharply.

Bella can practically see his eyes rolling.

"Don't be crude, Edward. Can I come in?"

It takes a minute, but eventually he says yes, and when she enters, she finds him curling into himself on the bed. She hesitantly crawls up to lay with him, wrapping her arm around his side, resting her palm over his chest.

"I was afraid," she whispers to him. "I was terrified that today would be my last day with you, Edward. I know what we're doing is really unorthodox when it comes to healing, and I thought for sure she would tell me I was bad for your recovery. I thought that… that when you saw her, you'd instantly attach yourself to her, like you did me, like I wouldn't be important anymore. Like what everyone thought."

She takes a deep breath, her forehead resting against his spine, her breath bouncing back at her as she tries to control her emotions. "And this morning, after your shower, you started… acting _differently_. You were calm, and collected, and I heard you talking to the guys, I heard you say you didn't want me with you on tour. I thought… I thought you didn't or wouldn't… that you were finished with me."

She lets out a long breath, finished with her confession, and waits.

And waits.

Edward doesn't respond, and after a full sixty seconds – she counted silently – she blinks back the tears, taking his silence as confirmation of her thoughts, and pulls back, away from him. She nods to herself and slides off the bed, remembering that not three hours ago, she was stubbing her toe. Now that seems like a bad omen that started her day.

She walks back the way she came, into the bathroom and closes the door behind her, as well as her connecting door, and tries to stop her trembling. She decides to leave her room, walking from there to Carlisle's study, which is perfectly empty, as he's downstairs with Dr. Salazar.

She sits in the wingback chair she sat in just last week, when she confessed to Carlisle that she was sleeping with Edward, and closes her eyes, laptop on her lap, closed and waiting for her to open and start to blog.

She doesn't.

Instead she opens the laptop and decides to delete all her entries, get rid of all of her thoughts, praying that with the click of the delete button, that she'll be able to clear her head. She goes back t o her first entry, almost two whole months ago, and re reads the words.

_Day eight. _

_I've been here for less than eight full days, and I think maybe, possibly, I might have made the biggest mistake of my life. I really can't bring myself to care, how sad is that? God. _

_So, in other news, I don't know what to do with "Charlie Brown" yet. I mean, I know I'm setting myself up for heartache, but ever since that last outburst, he's been … I guess he's been pretending to be better. I think he's pretending. It's hard to tell, but I know he's hiding something. I know, with his condition, that I'm just setting myself to fall-and-fail but… it's "Charlie Brown", so who can say no to **Charlie Brown**?_

_To be honest, I don't know what kind of girl I am anymore. This is the most **unlike** me I've ever been. I've always been a shy, timid, conservative kind of girl, but recently, I just can't help but feel like I left my old life 1500 miles from here. _

It looks so familiar to what she's feeling now. She's not who she was then, but she still doesn't know who she is, and she still feels like she's falling to fail, and Edward is still not telling her the truth. Bella wonders how she'll ever be able to go back to her old life, knowing what she knows now. She can never go back to writing, and journalism… never just fall back into life, into place like she was before.

The cursor hovers over the delete button, but in the end, she doesn't click it… can't click it. She changes the privacy setting instead, making them private, and password protected, keeping them… but keeping them hidden. After she updates it all, she closes the laptop and walks it back to her room, laying it on her desk before heading to the bathroom to take a bath.

She leaves the doors unlocked, not wanting Edward to freak out if he happens to come look for her – which he probably won't. He's made it pretty clear that he doesn't want to understand Bella's state of mind, and while Bella can kind of understand the way he feels, it goes both ways.

As she pours the bath bubbles into the warm running water, she runs her hand through the water slowly, helping the bubbles to expand into it. When it's filled enough, she folds up a hand towel to place at the top, for her neck to rest on, and slides into the bubbles, her hair pulled back over the lip of the tub so that it doesn't get wet. She closes her eyes, the smell of the vanilla and honey bubbles calming her instantly, if only on the surface.

She takes a few deep breaths and tries to relax, tries to think of anything _but _the only thing - person - on her mind. _Edward_.

The water feels soft and warm over her skin, but it doesn't stop her from the feeling of complete and utter uselessness. She tried to explain everything to him. She's never asked him to give her time. Today, she needs that time. She's always given him everything she has, and now that she's asking for a little understanding, she's not getting it. She's not getting any leeway from him, and that's not fair.

The tranquility she was looking for in the bath water is gone with the water's warmth, completely gone, and now she's just angry.

Angry with herself for breaking down.

Angry with Carmen for coming and evaluating them.

Angry with Carlisle for accepting Carmen so easily.

Angry with Edward for not giving, just taking.

She pulls herself out of the bath, grabbing the stopper from the drain, so the water doesn't sit, and dries off furiously. She slips into some gym shorts, a sports bra, and a hoodie and knots her hair up to the top of her head. After she gets into her running shoes, she writes out a note and puts it on her bed, leaving it for Edward.

Just in case.

_**Went for a run. I'll be back later**_

_**-**B_

After she stretches, she listens for any sign that Edward is even awake and sighs, balling up her fists to go.

She sees Rosalie in the living room and waves, telling her that she's going for a run, and then takes off, closing the front door behind her as she goes.

She keeps a slow pace, just a light jog so she can adapt to the cold bite of Forks weather. She doesn't get very far before Jasper is catching up to her, jogging along side her silently. She sees that for what it is, silent companionship.

She gives a light smile and then ups her pace, a little faster, then a lot faster, until she's at a downright sprint, her legs lunging quickly – left, right, left, right – and it burns and her throat is hot and cold, and so are her emotions.

She finally slows, her hands on her thighs as she bends at the waist, gasping out cold puffs of air.

"Fuck, my life is a Katy Perry song," she groans, squatting down, huddling into herself.

Jasper stops as well, arching his back as he stretches, barely winded from the run. He smiles sadly down at her, then reaches his hand out to help her up. "You kissed a girl and you liked it?" He asks, something she'd expect from Emmett, but not from him.

She laughs, all out laughs, her hand over her chest as she heaves for breath. "No, not that song, the "Hot and Cold" song," she explains. "My emotions are so spastic. I'm scared, I'm devastated, I'm exhausted, I'm energetic, I'm happy, I'm ecstatic. I can't even control it anymore; I don't know what to do."

"Well, when we're feeling that way, Edward writes, I play, and Emmett works out. Alice sketches, Rosalie broods, Esme redecorates, and Carlisle reads medical journals," Jasper smiles. "It isn't always easy, but if you find an outlet, it helps find that control."

He looks at her for a second and sighs. "You look like a roller coaster, but that isn't just from the run, I saw it earlier, when Edward found the razor. You were worried, like he'd tried to cut again, but happy when you saw he wasn't.

"It's a lot of responsibility, Bean, you can't expect it to come naturally. Even though," he says, raising his eyebrow. "It kind of does, for you at least."

"Did. Not anymore, Jasper. I… I can't do anything right for him today. I mean, I got scared when Carmen got here because… I know she can help, right? But I also felt so selfish because I didn't want to leave him, I wanted him to keep loving me."

"Bella, that's not. You know that's not a bad way to feel right? You're conflicted, but you're not wrong."

She looks up at him curiously and starts to walk, elongating her legs to stretch them as she moves forward. Jasper is at her side.

"I love Alice with every single part of me. If something happened and we had to separate, I'd understand it, but I'd fight it every step of the way. If she was sick and needed to be away from me, I'd feel that same pull you do. I'd feel selfish, but only because I want her. Always."

Bella sighs and steps up her pace again, the conversation over… for now at least. Jasper falls into step with her, and they keep it up for another twenty minutes before he starts to speed up, challenging Bella to do the same until they're running hard and fast again, but this time, for fun, not out of anger and confusion.

When they get back to the house, Bella and Jasper jog up the front steps, laughing together about their run. Jasper opens the door for her and she smiles lightly at Rosalie, and now Emmett, in the living room before going up the stairs to get back into the shower to wash off. She's sweaty, and her skin's too cold, but too hot all at once, and she's ready to rid herself of the physically confused part of herself.

She grabs some lounge clothes from her dresser and starts up the shower, still nowhere near a resolution, but feeling better, regardless. She wonders if Edward will discuss all of it with her, but decides to put it out of her mind through the shower, waiting for the water to warm before she undresses and steps inside.

The steam billows up the shower walls like clouds and fogs her sight blissfully, the warm water, and the warm air against her skin almost feels heavenly as she thaws out. As she reaches for the shampoo, she hears the bathroom door open, and light steps shuffling through the bathroom towards where she is. She knows exactly who just walked in. She continues on, lathering the shampoo in her hair, and waits for him to be the first to say something.

"I can't love you any less," he says as she begins to rinse her hair out. "Fuck, all day I've tried to stop, tried to find out if I could live without you here, but I couldn't. I fucking…." He pauses, and then he's pulling open the shower and stepping inside with her, his thin boxers instantly soaked through.

Bella gasps, stepping away from him as he crowds her against the tiles. "If Carmen separated us, I wanted to know that I could do this without you, and then she told us we were staying together. All I wanted was you. All I wanted was to show you, and you were so cold with me. I don't fucking get it. I don't get why you got defensive, and I don't get why you got frigid."

"Frigid? Are you serious right now, Edward?" She asks, scowling as she stares up at him. "You're joking, you have to be. I've given you all the fucking time I have for the last two months, and I tell you to wait one time. Onefucking time, and I'm frigid?"

"Carmen said it was ok, I thought you'd be over the moon about it, but instead you pushed me away."

"Yes, yes, it's all my fault. Of course," she says, pulling her towel off the towel rack and wrapping it around her as she steps out of the shower. "Of course it's my fault! How dare I say no to Edward Cullen's sexual advances? Dear me!" she sighs dramatically.

He growls at her as he follows, hopping out of his wet boxers, the fabric landing in the bathroom sink with a wet smack. A towel quickly replaces the wet clothing's space as he moves, hot on her heels.

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean? You're the one who said no."

"That's right, I did say no," Bella answers, stopping to turn and face him. "I said no because you and I needed to talk. We needed to talk about what we were going through, and instead you started groping and manhandling me."

"Manhandling you? I've never heard you complain before," Edward says, standing up close to her, staring down at her with deep dark eyes. Bella sighs, holds up her hand in a vague motion, and says, "Never mind, you don't fucking get it."

She moves to turn away when Edward grabs at her shoulders and pulls her flush against him. Her back pressed up against his chest as he breathes down her neck.

"Help me understand why my girlfriend would say no to fucking me," he groans, pushing his hips against her.

"Tell me what changed," she challenges, prying at his hands to get out of his grasp. "From the shower this morning, to Carmen's interview, you were completely different and I want to know what changed."

"Stop fucking moving," he says, tightening his hold on her. "You'll go when I tell you to go, Isabella."

"Talk to me," she says, still trying to get him off of her. "Get off of me and talk to me!"

"I want you," he tells her, biting at her neck, sucking the skin into his mouth. "I want you, only you, and I want you to be mine forever. Stop fucking moving!"

She cries out softly, the tears forming at the ducts of her eyes, shaking her head. "You can't have me, Edward. Not like this. You can force yourself on me, sure, you're stronger than I am, but if you do, you'll never have me."

That seems to get his attention. He pushes Bella forward, turning her in his grasp so that she's facing him. "You're _mine_."

"If I was, you'd never handle me the way you're handling me right now," she tells him, staring at him with hurt eyes.

He instantly lets go, backing away, standing a few feet from her, as he looks at her, his face a maze of confused emotions. She sees the inner battle going on in his eyes and shakes her head.

There's a knock at the door followed by Emmett's loud voice, "Bean? Everything all good up here? Jazz said you went running, just came up to see if you wanted to train with me."

Without moving, her eyes still trained on Edward, she answers Emmett. "Not now, Em, maybe later though, ok?"

It's quiet for a second, and then she hears Emmett's footfalls heading down the hallway until she can't hear them anymore.

"I'm not a toy, or a doll, or a groupie, Edward Cullen. I have feelings, and emotions, and a hell of a lot of spirit, and right now, you're not seeing any of that. I don't want to fuck you. I want you to listen to me, and I want you to talk to me so that I can listen to you. I want you to hold me and tell me that I can take as much fucking time as I need because you love me, not because you were waiting for a green light to bed me."

"What the fuck?" Edward asks, walking toward her again, closing in on her as she walks backward, away from him. "Is that what you think of me?"

"I never thought of you that way before this afternoon," she says, holding her head high. "Carmen gave us the go-ahead, I told you no, and you walked away from me. You walked away, and when I came in and told you all of my worst fears, trying to explain the way I felt, you ignored me. I've never been anything but patient with you, and when I needed you to extend that courtesy to me, you didn't."

He looks at her and sighs, shaking his head as he closes the distance between them, wrapping his hands around her waist. "I'm sorry," he whispers, resting his cheek on the top of her head, above her damp hair. "I'm so sorry, baby, I swear it."

She pushes him back so she can look into his eyes and stares, trying to gauge if he really meant it or not.

"I'm gonna just lay down," she tells him, tightening her towel around her chest as she pulls his hands away. "I need to think about all this."

"What is there to think about? Tell me," he pleads, reaching for her hand. "I said I was sorry, baby, I want to talk about things."

"I wanted to talk too, like… two hours ago," she answers, kissing at his palm as she lets his hand drop. "It's been an overwhelming kind of day. I think we should both just let ourselves calm down."

"Bella, please, I know what I did was selfish, I jus-"

"Edward?" she interrupts. "I'm asking you for time," she tells him easily. "I'm asking you for a little patience, so I can work through this before I take it all out on you. This isn't your fault, Edward. Not completely."

When she looks at his face, she takes a deep breath and reaches out for him, cupping her palm to his cheek. "Just give me an hour to regroup ok?"

He nods, silently. She smiles, and pulls away, going to the bathroom to get her lounge clothes, a pair of cotton shorts and a tank top, closes the door so that she can get dressed alone. She towels at her hair and opens the bathroom door back up, seeing Edward right where he was before, looking as if he hadn't moved.

"Edward?" she asks, walking to him. "Are you ok?"

He nods again, looking at her. "I just. I don't want to lose you. I know you need some time, but… can we just, just lie together? I promise I'll stay quiet so you can think things through, I just… I need to be close to you."

Bella smiles and nods, pulling him toward the bed with her. She crawls up first, pulling back the covers, and then waits for him to get in before she reaches over to get the blankets over him too. "I'm sorry," she whispers as she cuddles into him. "Today's been really tough."

"Me too," he whispers, kissing the top of her head. "We'll be ok though, right?"

She looks up at him and kisses at his chin. "We'll always be ok."

a/n: This project is kind of my _baby_. The term "Superman Complex" (AS USED BY ME) is completely my own fabricated diagnosis. I have no medical background. Special thanks to _**the -glory-days**_, as _always_, for kicking me in the ass every time I stop writing. Updates will be few and far between, but because they're so much longer than my other chapter updates, I hope that's all right with you guys.

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	16. Chapter 16

_Edward Cullen is a rock star in the biggest band of the decade. He's America's "It Boy," but he's still unhappy. Will Bella be in time to save him? AH AU_

Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer created _Twilight_; I'm just toying around with her characters.

AN: I've been feeling really uninspired lately, and I've recently moved, and started at a new university. Everything changed for me in a matter of months, and I'm still adjusting. I'm sorry for having a real life, and I hope you'll forgive me for taking so long to update. I will never abandon or take down this story, it might just take a while to be updated.

RECAP: Bella finds Edward in a closet, he tries to kill himself, she saves him. He develops Superman Complex, where he focuses on Bella as his savior. She leaves to Forks with him without explaining anything to anyone, not even her best friend, Angela. She lives with Edward's family in their house, secluded from everyone and everything. The first attempt to acclimate to society doesn't go well, Edward freaks out and begs Bella to leave. Bella refuses to go. Lunch with Bella's dad goes way better, the day before Dr. Carmen Salazar arrives. Carmen is a little condescending, doesn't really give them much of a chance, but when Bella and Edward are interviewed, she changes her mind. Edward pushes Bella for sex after Carmen says they can, and probably should do it. Bella asks for time.

And that's what you missed on _Glee_. Oh wait, uh, on Superman Complex

Bella and Edward fall into a bit of a groove—learning more about each other without being sexual. Truth be told, Bella's a little frightened that when she does has sex with Edward again, it will be too overwhelming—for both of them. She doesn't know what to do, and because she's trying not to think about it, it's the only thing she's can think about.

"Bella? Did you hear me? I was asking if you wanted to make banana bread tonight, for when Carmen comes back?"

Bella blinks. Carmen is coming in tomorrow, finally, after two weeks of silence; she finally called yesterday and said she'd be coming back tomorrow to talk with Edward and Bella.

"Oh, yeah Esme, that sounds great. I haven't made bread in a long time, though, so I might not be very helpful."

"Of course you will be dear. You'll keep me company at the very least. Plus, Edward said something about the boys recording tonight, so you'll probably end up bored out of your skull."

Bella smirks, nodding at Esme's assessment of her night, if the boys do choose to record. She's really hoping they do. Edward's been talking about it for a while—since the night after Carmen left. That first couple of days were really strained, and now, Bella's just glad they've come to some type of understanding.

"Should we go to the store first? Do we have everything we need?" Bella asks, after a long companionable silence. She looks around the kitchen. Her eyes sweep over the counters for bananas. "Bananas?"

"I'll have Alice stop by the store on her way home."

"Oh, right, she's with a client in Port Angeles, right? That's not too far, is it?"

Esme shakes her head no and smiles, walking over to Bella and kissing the top of her head. "Go see how Edward's doing, or take a bath or something. You look frazzled."

Bella almost says, "I want to have sex with Edward," but stops herself, remembering just in time that Esme is _Edward's___mother, not hers. Instead, she says, "You know what? I think I'm going to take you up on that bath. I need a good bath right now." She grins and stands up, leaving Esme in the kitchen and goes to find Edward.

She finds him in the practice room, playing around with two or three chords and humming along to the sounds. It's nothing really coherent. Leaning against the doorframe, Bella watches him twiddle through the different sounds, going from light to dark. She clears her throat when she realizes that he's not going to notice her right away. He stops immediately and smiles up at her from his spot on the floor.

"What's up, Bella?" he asks. He sets his guitar back on the stand and walks to her. "You ok?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," she nods. "I'm gonna go relax and prepare for tomorrow. Carmen's coming, remember?"

"I do," he answers with a quick grimace. "We got the all clear already. I'm not even going to stress over her coming."

"Good," Bella smirks. "I'll do enough worrying for the both of us. Now, I'm going to take a bath, and then your mother and I are making some banana bread. You want to help us out? I mean if you're not recording? We'll probably start after Alice gets back from her meeting with her client."

He shrugs. "You want me to help? I mean, I can serenade the two greatest ladies in my life as they bake." His grin makes Bella giggle.

"How about you don't mortify me?" Bella decides. "Remember when we made pancakes? Your whole family watched us make out by the stove."

"That wasn't making out, Bella Swan. Someday, I'll show you making out." He waggles his eyebrows. "Now come with me, I'll set up your bath for you."

Once the water is running and the candles are lit, Edward politely averts his eyes, so Bella can undress and slide into the water. This is part of their new groove. He is finally giving her what she asked for two weeks ago—time. She realizes this, and silently thanks him every time he does something sweet like this for her.

"Ok, I'm covered," she grins, flicking some of the bubbles at him. He rolls his eyes and sits on the lip of the tub and smiles at her.

"So, at this exact moment, what is the percentage of me attempting to kiss you? _And_ succeeding?"

She pretends to think about this for a while. She rubs her forefinger and thumb against jaw. "Well, that all depends. What's the percentage of you actually attempting said kiss?"

He doesn't even hesitate before he says, "One hundred percent."

Bella laughs. "Well then, I suppose the percentage of your success would be about ninety-nine point nine percent."

"Oh, is that all?" Edward asks, laughing. He leans forward and kisses her softly, nothing like their previous bath time make out session. This time, his lips are soft and warm on hers, his body angled over her protectively, as opposed to climbing into the tub with her and straddling her hips. He smiles at her sweetly as he pulls away, twirling a stray strand of hair out of her face. "Want me to stay?"

"Sure, if you want to. I mean—you don't have to."

She watches as he makes himself comfortable, rolling up a towel, so he can rest his neck against the lip of the tub. She runs her hand through his hair as he lies back, and together, they just rest, knowing that with Carmen coming, things might change.

This time, Bella's not as worried about the changes that Carmen might bring with her. She's resigned herself to knowing that she'll do whatever it takes to make him better—even if that means sleeping in separate rooms, or leaving for a time, or giving him space. He's done as much for her in the last few weeks, and she's grateful for it. She could do the same if she's asked to.

As the bath water loses its warmth, Bella—whose fingers are pruned—giggles. She waits for Edward to leave before she gets out of the bath and returns to her closet to find something to wear.

She decides on a pair of black leggings and a dark blue top. She pulls her hair back with a blue headband and puts lotion on her hands and arms before she follows the sounds of Edward's guitar in the practice room.

Jasper and Emmett are there too, on their respective instruments, all of them laughing over Edward's last chord failure.

"So, recording tonight?" They all look up at her. All three of them look guilty. "What? What did you do?"

Jasper smirks. "Nothing, Edward was just telling us about your bath," he grins, waggling his eyebrows.

"He totally peeked," Emmett says, nodding. "Said the bubbles were gone by the time you got out."

Bella gasps with her hand over her chest and laughs. "You pervert!" she says, pointing at him with her free hand. "You're never sitting in with me again!"

"No, Bella," Edward says fast, putting his guitar down to run to her, shooting glares at both of the boys in the room. "They're teasing. I mean, I did see, but I looked away. I know you want time, and I respect that."

Bella looks at him appraisingly, and then looks to the boys, who are laughing silently.

"Fine. But if this happens again, Edward Cullen, we're never having bath time again," she tells him, pointing her finger at him. She laughs and turns to leave. "Time to bake."

When she gets downstairs, she sees the front door open. Alice is talking to someone coming up the front porch. Alice says, "She'll be surprised to see you, and we're going to be baking, so it will give you some time to get caught up again." Bella walks to the door and screams.

"Oh my God!" she squeaks, running to Alice. Next to Alice is Angela, toting her luggage. She tackles Angela right there on the porch. She hugs her fiercely, swaying back and forth.

A stampede of feet comes down the stairs as the boys come down to make sure Bella's alright after her screaming.

Edward is the front runner, "Bella, baby, are you ok?" he asks as he comes to the front door. He looks confused as he sees her hugging another person.

"She's perfectly fine," Alice answers, grinning. "Boys, this is Angela. Angela, these are the boys."

Bella doesn't let go, just moves so Angela can greet them. She smiles, blushing. Bella tugs at her hand and pulls her into the house. "Angie, this is Edward Cullen, Emmett McCarty, and Jasper Whitlock. They already know that we're über fans and that we used to listen to their records all the time, so don't be embarrassed."

She smiles, laughing softly and waves with her free hand. Emmett grabs Angela's luggage from the porch. Alice tells him to put it in Bella's room.

"Angela, what are you doing here?" Bella asks, leading her to the couch. Everyone follows in, moving to arrange themselves on the living room furniture, and on the floor. Edward sits at Bella's feet, holding her hand.

"Um, this is totally overwhelming. I thought you were abducted by the mob, not living with our favorite band," Angela admits, looking a little angry. "I'm totally mad at you, but we can discuss that later, uh, in private?"

Bella nods, laughing as Edward tugs at her hand. "Fine, Jesus," she says. "Edward, Angela is my bestie from Arizona. She's the one I've been emailing back and forth with?"

"Did you invite her here?" he asks, smiling cautiously at Angela. "What about the gag order?"

"I invited her," Alice says from the love seat, sitting next to Jasper. "I background checked her like I background checked Bella."

"You background checked me?" Bella asks, looking at Alice.

"Duh, we've all been background checked, but you two in particular were fairly boring. Rosalie at least had a record," Alice sighs.

"Hey—hey, leave my indecent exposure out of this, Mary Alice," Rosalie laughs, leaning into Emmett on the floor by the fireplace. "It was one time—ten years ago."

"Anyway," Alice continues, looking back to Edward. "I spoke with Carlisle and Esme, and they agreed. Bella needs someone who knows her like we don't. It's not fair to her to be forced to stay here, and Angela is a peach. You'll all love her."

"Hey, I'm not being forced to stay," Bella says, mostly for Edward's benefit. "I mean, I'm glad Angela's here. She's my best friend and having her in the dark about it really sucked, but it was my choice to come here, and I don't regret that," she smiles, looking at Edward's grinning face.

Edward leans up, kissing Bella softly. She blushes and looks to Angela with a shrug. "Uh, I'm also dating him," she confesses. "My dad likes him. I mean, he doesn't know who Edward Cullen is, but he knows he's a musician, and he likes him."

Angela smirks. "I can't believe you're hooking up with Edward Cullen," she says, nudging Bella. "Oh my god. I said that out loud, didn't I?"

Emmett laughs and nods appreciatively. "I like her; she can stay."

"Well, it wasn't up to you any way, but I'm glad we have your approval," Alice says. "She's staying for a week, up in Bella's room. She's agreed to sign the necessary paperwork about our privacy, and she's Bella's best friend, so we can trust her."

Bella looks at Alice with a grateful smile. "I love you, Alice," she tells her, hugging Angela again. "So, so much for this."

Alice waves her hand dismissively. "Now, I think the boys had some things to do. We can continue this shindig at dinner. We've got breads and cookies and shit to bake. Shoo!" she says, swatting at Jasper.

Edward and Emmett follow Jasper back up the stairs with Angela's luggage. When they're out of sight, Angela tugs on Bella's shirt and mouths, "Oh my fucking god!" Bella just laughs.

"Yeah, welcome to my life. Follow me, I want you to meet Esme," Bella says, pulling her and Alice along. Rosalie follows into the kitchen and sits back, smiling.

"Is this Angela?" Esme says, looking from Alice to Bella, and then back at Angela. Bella nods. "Well, you're beautiful, and we've heard so much about you! Welcome, welcome."

"Thank you for having me," Angela says, smiling shyly. "It's good to be here."

The chit-chat doesn't last very long, not once Bella sees Esme nod her head toward upstairs. Taking the hint, Bella smiles in thanks and then pulls Angela along with her upstairs where they can have some privacy.

As soon as the door is closed, Angela turns on Bella, hands on her hips, eyes squinted. "You're dating, Edward-freaking-Cullen? Holy shit, Isabella Marie."

"You know why I couldn't say anything," Bella sighs, sitting on the bed. "And yes, we're dating. But it's complicated. I don't know how much Alice told you, but it's this whole, long, drawn out thing, and—Well, shit, what _did_ she tell you?"

"Nothing really, just that there was an accident, and you helped Edward. She didn't go into too many details. She just said that it was their fault that you never told me."

Bella takes a deep breath and then pats the bed beside her. "Well, sit down, this will take a while."

When Angela sits down, Bella explains the whole thing out. She tells her about finding Edward in the closet, about the asshole doctor, Tyler Crowley, and then about coming out here. She tells Angela about going to La Push, with Jake and Nessie, and then going to lunch with her father. When she gets to Carmen, Angela holds up her hand.

"Wait—wait, you slept with him?"

Rolling her eyes, Bella groans, "I knew that's all you'd catch."

"I'm honestly curious, bitch. Was it good?"

"Um, well, it was kind of sad, actually. I was really scared that I was going to have to leave, and he was terrified that I was leaving, and it just kind of happened? I mean, it was good, but …bittersweet?"

"And you haven't, since?"

"No," she shrugs. "The doctor said we could, because our dynamic is so close, but I just can't. I'm still adjusting to everything. Carmen's coming back, tomorrow, and Edward's agreed to give me some time. I just feel like we're not really dating as much as I'm just caring for him, or well, that's how I felt in the beginning, not anymore. I realized early on that what I felt was more than just—"

"Oh my god, you love him!" Angela gasps. "You totally love him." She smirks.

"That's the problem, Ang. He might not really love me back. The doctors don't know much about his condition, just how it manifests and some of the stages. Edward is completely off the charts, and Carmen said she wouldn't have known Edward had anything wrong with him."

"Well, that's good, right?"

"Yes and no. He could be pretending. We don't really know. I mean, I'd like to think he's getting better—and he is—to an extent. And a few weeks ago, he had this huge thing, and Carmen still doesn't know what to make of us."

"Well, shit."

"Bingo." Bella laughs.

They talk for a little while longer, laughing and going over what Angela's been up to. That is, until the smell of banana bread wafts through the house and into her room. "Shit," Bella laughs. "We were supposed to be doing that."

"Alice told me that she expected us to wander off," Angela shrugs. "She's—"

Bella just nods, laughing. "Yep."

They giggle for a little while longer until Edward knocks on the door, peeking inside. "So, ladies, um, can I borrow Bella for a minute?"

Bella looks to Angela, who nods. She gets up and closes the door behind her. "What's up, Edward?"

"I just miss you. You've been holed away for like two hours."

"She's my best friend, Edward. I haven't seen her in a long time. We had a lot to talk about."

"I know, I just missed you, and we recorded some acoustic tracks, and I wanted you to hear them, and tell me what you think."

"Angie, too?"

Edward grimaces slightly, scrunching up his nose. Bella raises an eyebrow and puts her hands on her hips. "Really, Edward?"

"Having you listen was also code for making out?" he says, pleading. When Bella doesn't relent, he sighs. "Can we make out later?"

Bella smiles and kisses him on the cheek. "I'll meet you in the practice room." She goes back inside the room and grabs Angela, practically dragging her to the practice room.

"You understand we'll be the first to hear these tracks?" Bella says, looking at Angela. "That's awesome, right?"

"And you're sure Edward doesn't mind?" Angela asks, looking nervous.

"Yes, I'm sure. It's only a few tracks; he's fine with it." Bella notices that Angela still looks skeptical, but follows along with Bella into the room anyway. Edward's sitting behind the glass, ready to start the tracks as Bella and Angela sit down.

They're older tracks, from their first two CDs, which makes both Bella and Angela extremely happy. Acoustically, the songs seem to take on a new meaning, and Bella watches Edward as he moves his fingers along the fret of the guitar silently as the tracks play.

"That's what we've got today, and then we did a cover, just for fun. Um, do you want to hear it?" Edward asks, looking to both girls. "It's just something, you know, just for us."

Bella nods, as does Angela, so he presses the play button for the cover. Bella giggles when she hears the opening rifts. "The Weight" by The Band, is one of Bella's all-time favorite songs. Charlie used to play this song all the time when she was little, and as Edward's voice sings the words softly on the track, Bella can't help the goofy grin on her face. Eventually, both Jasper's and Emmett's voices come in for the chorus, which is when Angela joins in—blushing bright red.

When the song ends, Bella nudges Angela, who is still pretty red, and stands up, giggling. "You're such a girl!" Bella teases and winks at her.

Edward comes over and kisses Bella's temple, wrapping his arm over her shoulders. "What did you think?" he asks her softly. Bella nods enthusiastically and wraps her arms around his waist.

"They were amazing," Bella nods. "Seriously. And how did you know about 'The Weight?' That's my favorite song since forever!"

Edward just laughs and shrugs. "I didn't know, not really. I love that song, too, and Jasper's a big softie for it, so—"

Bella looks at Angela and winks. Edward looks between them and notices the blush returning to Angela's cheeks.

"Oh, so Jasper's your favorite?"

"Um, can we not talk about this?" Angela pleads and looks at Bella for help.

"Leave her be," Bella says, pulling herself out of Edward's grasp. "Let's go down and help with the baking. We were supposed to be doing that anyway."

"The boys are down there now, too. When Carlisle gets back, it'll be just like pancakes," Edward smiles to Bella.

"Pancakes?"

Bella rolls her eyes and links arms with Angela, explaining the whole thing on their way downstairs. Edward follows closely behind them, a small strand of Bella's hair wrapped around his fingers as he trails.

When they get into the kitchen, Bella finds that almost everything is already done. There are four or five loaves of bread already cooling, and by the looks of it, two more in the oven. She frowns and sits down at the kitchen island. "I'm so sorry, Esme. We were gonna come down, but I lost track of time."

"No need to apologize, sweetheart. We'll do it again sometime. Although, I was going to make a batch of chocolate chip cookies. You and Angela could help me with that?"

Bella nods and looks to Angela, who looks equally excited about the idea. They get started on the batter, still rehashing memories. Angela tells the family more about Bella and what she was like as a kid, and Esme tells Angela about all the boys.

After the cookies are done, everyone gathers in the living room with a glass of milk and a few freshly baked treats, sitting around the fire. Eventually, Edward yawns, and when Bella looks at the clock, she groans and sits up.

"Time for bed, it seems. Carmen will be here bright and early."

Everyone seems to agree, each of them getting up and heading upstairs. "Angie, your bathroom connects with Edward's room, so if you use it, just lock the door, that way we don't walk in on you," Bella laughs. "All my bath stuff's in there already, so you can use all of it."

Angela nods, saying goodnight to everyone. "See you in the morning, then," she smiles, closing the door behind her.

Edward pulls Bella into their shared room and hugs her tight to his chest. "You're not really tired, are you?" he asks with a mischievous smirk.

They don't go to sleep until much later—with swollen lips and breathless.

In the morning, Carmen arrives with much less fanfare than the last time. Bella isn't as nervous, even though she thinks she probably should be. She greets everyone amicably and settles into the downstairs guest room, allowing the family to wake up. After she unpacks her things, Bella offers to help Esme in the kitchen with breakfast. They all congregate there, Angela sitting next to Emmett, looking just as star struck as the day before.

"You're quiet, kid," Emmett says, nudging her. "I figured someone who is friends with Jellybean would be a little more talkative."

"Leave her alone, Em. She'll be fine after some coffee, right Ang?" Bella asks, handing over a mug full.

Angela nods, gratefully, and sips it slowly. Carmen comes in and takes the seat next to her, introducing herself.

"Everyone knows I'm here just to observe for a week or two. I want to try and gauge the next course of action in Edward's condition. Right now," she turns her attention to the whole room. "I'm kind of impressed. I mean, in the two weeks since I was here, I can see a major improvement with Edward. In sessions, I'd like to dwell on that."

Edward and Bella both nod. As the eggs and bacon are cooked, Bella helps Esme slice up some of the breads from last night and gets everything on the table for a buffet style breakfast.

After everyone eats, Angela offers to help clean up the dishes while Edward and Bella go into the den with Carmen.

"I must say, you look much calmer today, Bella," Carmen smiles. "Is that because your friend is here?"

Bella sighs and thinks about how Carmen just delves right in. "Kind of, I suppose. Though, it's more the fact that you're not going to separate us—Edward and me. That's what had me so worked up that day. That and the shower thing."

"Ah, yes, the shower thing," Carmen nods, looking back through her notes. "Carlisle told me about that. Edward, what was going through your mind when you saw the razor?"

"At first," Edward begins, grabbing Bella's hand. "I was just picking it up to tease Bella about it. It had yellow flowers on it, and I was going to laugh about how girly it was. Then I saw the blade, and it was like a flashback in movies? You know, when there's no sound, and it's just image after image after image."

"Alright, what did you see then?"

"I saw everything I'd done that day during the concert. I saw Bella trying to stop me, and then me turning the weapon back at her. I felt it all over again," he murmurs, looking down at his lap."

"Bella? What did you do when you found him in this state? What would you say it was like?"

"He was completely zoned out," she says, smiling softly at Edward. "The razor was tight in his fist, and he was just staring at it. When I pulled it out of his hands, it slipped. W hen it hit the ground, it was as if the trance was broken. He fell against me. Out cold. I called for Carlisle and Jasper, and they came in and woke him up."

Carmen nods, still scribbling. "Then what?"

"He apologized to me for what he did. I was scared, but relieved that he was okay. When I asked him if he was trying to do it again, he looked so hurt."

"I won't ever do anything like that again," Edward says, looking directly at Bella. "I saw what it did to everyone. I won't _ever_ do that again."

Stopping them with a raised hand, Carmen says, "This sounds almost—and don't take my word on it right now, I still have a lot of research to do, mind you—almost like what the experts call, 'The Trigger.' Although, we don't have any experience with this, at this stage, it's just theoretical."

"Um, what?" Bella asks. "What does that mean?"

"'The Trigger' is the final stage of Superman Complex, Bella. No patient has ever gotten that far, that we know of, of course," she explains. "Theoretically, doctors have theorized that if the patient finds something that ties in the event to his present, that the disorder can be completely eradicated."

"Eradicated how?" Edward asks.

"Simple therapy and sure will," Carmen says. "Like I said, I have a lot of research to do, but from the sound of it, that event might just be what I think it is." She pauses for a second and writes down another little note.

"Bella, how was Edward after the event? Was he different in any way?"

"No—" Bella stops. "Wait, yes. I thought it was because you were coming, like he was putting on a face, but—but he did change. It was like he was back to being himself. The way he is now. How I think he was before the accident."

"Like he was before the attempted suicide?" Carmen asks. "Or before the shower incident?"

"Before the suicide," Bella says. "Mind you, I didn't know him, but he's much more confident, and he acts much more independently now, right?" she asks and looks at Edward. "Do you think so?"

"I don't really know," Edward shrugs. "I think so, I guess. But it's been a long time since I've felt like me again. I feel like the old me. Before the drugs. Before the band."

Carmen looks at him before scratching down another note. "Have you ever thought about going back to your life before all this? Do you think the stress of your fame has forced your hand a little?"

"Yeah, the stress was hard, and it built up and up and up," Edward nods. "But I can't just stop, you know? I love the music, I just—I wish—"

"What?" Bella asks. "What do you wish?"

"That we didn't have to tour and promote, and go out all the time. I like the music, I just hate the events," he says, breathing out a long exhale. "Whoa, it feels good to say that out loud," he smiles.

Bella laughs at him and rests her head on his shoulder.

Carmen nods. "I'd actually recommend that you take more time off. If you go back out at all, to tour, to promote, to travel, I'd say you take a good three to five years off."

Bella looks surprised. "Wait, why so long?"

"An event like this doesn't just go away, and if I'm right, Edward has been feeling depressed for much longer than he let on," she says, looking at Edward, who shrugs. "It's okay, Edward. That type of life isn't for everyone. Agents and producers, they aren't out there for your health, they're there for profit."

"So you think he should retire?" Bella asks.

"I'm asking him to take a long break, and until I research 'the Trigger,' I'd like him to keep an open mind about how his life will be if he doesn't go back at all."

"I can't just do that to Emmett and Jasper," Edward says. "And the fans. No way!"

Bella tightens her hand around his. "This is about you, Edward, not anyone else."

"Let me ask you, Edward," Carmen says. "You're almost thirty. Where do you see yourself in five years? Married? Family? Touring?"

Edward looks at Carmen curiously.

"You don't have to answer right now, Edward, just think it over. I'll meet with you guys again, tomorrow, and hopefully, we'll both have some answers."

Edward nods, and Bella smiles.

"Bella, you should also think about this. Your entire life has been turned upside down in three months. Can you go back to your life—the way it was? What will you be doing in five years?"

She leaves the question in the air as she starts to close her notebook. "That's all for today. I'll be observing everything around the house, but you don't have to worry about me being around. Honestly, it's more of a personal visit than professional. I haven't spent time with Esme for far too long," Carmen confides, winking at them both. "You can go."

a/n: This project is kind of my _baby_. The term "Superman Complex" (AS USED BY ME) is completely my own fabricated diagnosis. I have no medical background. Special thanks to _**the-glory-days**_, as _always_, for kicking me in the ass every time I stop writing. Updates will be few and far between, but because they're so much longer than my other chapter updates, I hope that's all right with you guys.

**TWITTER:**seevousplay  
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